Author's note: Break it down...I'm not exactly sure the time in which my events take place, it may jump around from season to season, unintentionally, please don't hurt me on that account. Well, whichever, hope you enjoy. If you don't, feel free to flame me. I'll probably deserve it.
NeoVenus22
Whatever Happens, Happens
Chapter One: What Jean Heard
Jean Grey was starving. She'd managed to scarf half of an English muffin before leaving for school that morning, but she'd had to make up a missed chemistry lab during lunch, and had soccer practice after school, so she was dying of hunger by the time she made it back to the Xavier Institute for Gifted Youngsters.
Whoever said that these were the best years of your life, clearly wasn't one of the X-Men. As if soccer, basketball, softball, advanced classes, and just the general struggle to graduate high school weren't enough, Jean also had to deal with the pressures of being a mutant. Which meant saving the world that hated her x-gene-bearing guts, and trying desperately to keep the whole thing secret. Jean was completely exhausted, and of course, starved.
The kitchen was empty, save for one lone coffee cup in the dishwasher that indicated Professor Xavier had been in earlier. Jean fixed herself a sandwich and ate it, not minding the complete silence that was settling. She thought about doing a quick psi-scan, to see where everyone was, but she knew there was no danger, or else they would have contacted her. In fact, she was quite enjoying these few moments alone.
As a senior, and as having been an X-Man longer than most, Jean was looked up to as some sort of authority figure. Her friends at school always asked her for sports, homework, or guy advice. Her friends here asked for training help in the Danger Room, even though Jean wasn't the best. She didn't have athletic prowess like Rogue, or a fierce come-and-get-it attitude like Spyke. She was good in a pinch, especially in creating psi-shields and levitating a teammate out of danger, but she didn't have the capability for leadership that Cyclops had, and was worried that they saw her as second-in-command, when she wasn't sure that she could handle that.
Between everyone asking for help, and her inherent nature to not turn someone down, Jean felt like she was being pulled in a million directions lately. It was so hard to help people and not get any credit for it, it was hard knowing that if she did, she could just as easily be looked upon as the villain in the situation, even if she was the hero.
Jean finished her sandwich and put the plate in the dishwasher, then headed for her room. She was walking past the library, when she heard Scott say, "And basically, I told him he had the personality and intellect of a gym sock, so I really wasn't threatened by him in the slightest."
Scott was answered by a pealing laugh that Jean didn't recognize. Did Scott have a girl over to the mansion? Had he okayed it with the Professor? And who could it be? Not Taryn, thank God. Taryn, Jean's former best friend, was driving Jean nuts with her very obvious crush on Scott, and it sickened her that Scott couldn't see through Taryn's phony act.
"Ya didn't!" a familiar voice said. Rogue. No wonder she didn't recognize the laugh; Rogue never laughed.
Wait...since when did Scott and Rogue have the sort of jokey, laughing relationship?
Jean hovered by the doorway, not entirely obscured. Not that it mattered, because the library was big enough that you might not necessarily see someone standing in the doorway, if you were in the right position. Besides, she didn't know yet if she wanted to go in.
Rogue and Scott were sitting across from each other, in the big leather chairs in the corner, next to the huge picture window. There was a tray of cookies on the table between them. There was a large, leafy plant that blocked Jean from view from them, but if she was standing, allowed her to see them.
"Yeah, I did," Scott said with a grin.
Rogue was actually smiling. "An' what did he say?"
"He didn't say anything. Just gulped for air like a fish."
Rogue laughed again, and Jean thought she saw the Goth's eyes flick in her direction. Quickly she ducked back into the hall. "Wish Ah'd been able to see it," Rogue said. "So glad to see Duncan put in his place for once."
So they were talking about Duncan? Jean rolled her eyes in annoyance. That was so like Scott. Why couldn't those two idiots just get along? Was it so hard?
They weren't saying anything. Jean peeked around the corner; they were chewing on cookies. She decided she should go, she really had no business listening in on their conversation. It was like reading their minds without permission, and she already knew Rogue didn't like her.
But as she was starting to go away, she heard Rogue ask, "Scott, when ya dream...d'ya dream in colors, or just in red?"
Jean stopped dead in her tracks and edged closer to the door, propelled by some higher force. She shouldn't listen. It was wrong. This was a private conversation.
She didn't budge, however.
"Wow. No one's ever asked me that," Scott said, and Jean realized that even she, who'd known Scott the longest, had never asked him about his mutation. "Sometimes. Sometimes I dream in color. I mean, I know what colors are what, obviously, and I can distinguish them in my mind, you know? But a lot of the time, I dream in red."
"That mus' be awful," Rogue said sympathetically. One of them drummed their fingers on the table, Jean didn't dare look to see who, and then Rogue said, "Y'know, sometimes Ah think maybe we were destined t'meet."
"Oh, yeah?" Scott said, and to Jean's surprise, he didn't sound annoyed or bored, but actually interested. "How so?"
"It's like, ya understand me, y'know? Probably better than anyone else will. Like Kitty, she's only intangible when she wants ta be. An' Kurt, he's got his inducer, so he can be 'normal' with the push of a button. But me, Ah always gotta wear gloves. An' you always gotta wear shades. An' we may never be 'fixed'."
Jean felt her heart twisting. She hadn't thought about that. Hadn't thought about how hard it must be for the both of them. Yeah, Jean's mutation was hard, but it was a mental thing. She wasn't as much of a 'mutant' as, say, Kurt. She had a superior mind, but that wasn't the sort of thing you noticed right off the bat. If you didn't know her as personally as the X-Men did, you might never know that Jean was a telepath, a teke. And she could almost turn off her telepathy, not hear the thoughts around her. But Scott always saw in red.
She glanced in. Scott nodded, looking thoughtful. "I know what you mean."
The two of them stared at the tabletop for a long time, and finally Scott said, "Rogue? When you absorbed me..."
"Were ya in mah head?" Rogue finished.
He looked surprised that she had guessed that, but only for a second. And Jean felt a little surprised herself. They were sort of on the same wavelength, and she wasn't sure she liked that. "Yeah."
"Yeah, ya were. Still are, kinda."
"Is it hard? To deal with all those voices?"
Voices? Jean thought. Clearly they'd had some sort of conversation about this before.
"The Professor helps me sometimes, with controllin' 'em. Subduin' 'em, y'know? But they're always there. Ah can't turn 'em off. Ya know what Ah mean."
"It's hard, isn't it," Scott agreed. "To never be able to turn it off."
They offered weak but sincere smiles at each other, and commiserated together. Jean fell back into the hallway and leaned against the wall. She closed her eyes, lost in thought. The both of them always seemed so in control. Rogue didn't know that much about her powers, but she seemed like she had enough basic knowledge to operate. Scott usually seemed so together. He was a leader, and he acted like one, he naturally was like one, and it had never occurred to Jean that he wasn't perfectly okay with his mutation. Well, not so much okay as accepting.
Scott, and to some extent, Rogue, had never acted like they were particularly bothered, and so she had just assumed that they weren't bothered. Everyone else at the mansion was fairly comfortable with their powers, even Kurt, so...
"Can Ah help ya?"
Jean's eyes flew open, and she saw Rogue standing there, hands on hips, glaring at her.
"I, uh..." Jean said, then realized she didn't know what she could say. She was hanging out in front of the library, there was nothing else in the hall that she could have been busy with, and she'd been leaning against the wall. It was fairly obvious what was going on.
"What, didja think we wouldn't notice?" Rogue said. "Not that it comes as much of a surprise or nothin'. Gawd knows how many times you've been in mah mind uninvited."
"I--" Jean tried to defend herself.
"But Scott at least is your friend. Could extend him some kinda courtesy." Rogue shook her head, looking disgusted.
"Rogue, I wasn't--"
"Whatever," the younger girl said coldly, and stalked down the hallway.
Jean watched her go, and when she turned back, she saw Scott standing in the spot Rogue had vacated. "I'm not going to go as far as to accuse you of telepathy here," he said evenly. "I know you better than Rogue does, and I know you wouldn't do that. But eavesdropping is just as bad, Jean. It was a private conversation."
Well then maybe you shouldn't have left the door open, Jean thought angrily.
"I didn't think we had to worry about that sort of thing at the mansion," he answered coldly, and Jean realized that in her state of anger, she'd accidentally projected that thought. "Besides, most people would have realized it was a private conversation, and left."
"I'm sorry," she sighed. "I feel awful."
She felt sort of bad to be playing to his softer side, knowing that with the right expression and tone, she could get him to forgive her. It was a mean trick, and he didn't deserve it, especially when she'd been in the wrong, but she didn't want Scott to be mad at her.
But Scott surprised her. "Yeah, you should be," he said, brushing past her.