Innocence and Audacity
Chapter 2
AN: Hope you like this so far! I'd like to thank my TIP roomie, Aparna, for allowing me to use 'I and A', the title of a piece of music she wrote, for this fic.
Disclaimer: I don't even own the TITLE!
I suppose I'm getting a little ahead of myself, though. I'll go back to right before Sesshomaru invaded, when my father had been his most overbearing, and when everything was getting to be too much for me to endure.
"Please, father, if I could just take the morning off, spend it outside in the garden.I'm so sick of needlework, and it's such a beautiful day." "I said no, and I meant it! Now go to your lessons, you impudent girl! I need to attend to important matters!" I stared at him, in a state of shock, feeling as though my world was teetering over the edge of a cliff, about to plunge into disaster. I loved my father, though I had always been second best and just a girl in his eyes. He had always made it clear that he respected me for my intelligence and sharp wit, and though he tired of my willpower, he still seemed to be proud of it, against his better judgement. But now. he had told me to my face that I wasn't important enough to take up his precious time. With my lip quivering, I gave him my most deadly glare, turned on my heels, and fled, struggling to keep from weeping. My thoughts flew to my only conceivable source of comfort: Sango. She would be my solace. She would relieve me from my sorrow, and help me determine my course of action.
Sango was holed up in her room, cross-stitching. Unlike me, she actually seemed to enjoy it, much to the delight of our teachers and nurses.
"Good Morning, Kagome!" was her cheerful salutation. Once she saw the look on my face, she stopped sewing, choosing instead to jump up and embrace me.
"Oh, Kagome.what happened? Was it your father again?"
"He's always been strict, but lately.he's been downright cruel to me. I don't know why it bothers me so much, but Sango, he's the only family I've got left! And I'm so tired of being here. You're the only one I can really talk to, but the only time we get to talk is at night, before bed. During the day, we're attending pointless, pointless lessons.the teachers are all monks! They believe girls should be kept subdued and in submission; seen and not heard, for heaven's sake! All day long, the idiotic 'ladies' in here talk incessantly about catching husbands and looking hot in their new gowns, and these are the people I'm supposed to be friends with. My father hates it that I'm not exactly like them. I just can't be that. I'm not a perfect little porcelain doll!"
"It can't be that bad, sweet. Your father does love you; it's undeniable. Aren't you overreacting just a little? I'll always be here for you to talk to, and the life of a princess is something any one of those ladies would give up their favorite gowns for!"
"I know I sound really ungrateful, but it's not just that. I can't say anything if it's not about dresses or marriages, and all the while, the kingdom is failing. I know it, though no one says anything to me. Father grows grayer and more wan by the day, and I hear the servants talking. They say that servant work is actually the only work anyone can find, and outside the palace, the crops aren't growing, and children are dying. They say that it could be a curse, a plague on the house of Higurashi!" With this last outburst, I collapsed on the bed, weeping.
"Shush, it's okay, it's going to be alright." Sango attempted to comfort me, hugging me and allowing me to cry. Eventually I was able to sit up and dry my eyes. Turning to my dearest friend, I realized something strange: far from looking consoling, Sango's expression was one of extreme confusion and turmoil, as though she was having an incredible internal altercation with herself. She was definitely trying to make up her mind about something, something important. Finally, she turned to me, and remarked, "Your situation's much worse than I thought it was, and all this trouble is clearly taking a toll on you. Maybe I have a solution. I know you can't continue to live this way, and maybe it's not the right thing to do, but I think you should leave the palace." "WHAT? Do you have any idea what my father would DO to me if I were caught??!!!" "Of course I do, but really.what other options do you have? Do you want to continue being a prisoner in your own home?" she replied. Her last response stuck with me after I left her room that night, and continued to vex me over the following week. I desperately wanted to escape, but would that really solve any problems? What about the kingdom, and its problems? I knew that it could be seen as an act of inconceivable selfishness; leaving just as my land entered its darkest times. Finally, I came to a conclusion: I would sneak out of the castle early one morning, and return later on that day, so that no one would even guess that I had ever left, and so that I could see what the outside world was truly like. I would determine a better course of action after I knew what waited for me outside. Deciding which day to leave, however, proved to be a bigger task than I thought it would be: I would have to choose a day on which everyone in the castle was madly busy, and would be far too flustered to notice the absence of one silly little princess. I settled on the following Sunday. One of the aforementioned and ridiculously silly ladies of the castle was to be married to an equally moronic but rather handsome knight, and everyone, including my father, was involved. My role was miniscule and insulting: stay out of the way while the adults took care of everything. Though it may have been belittling, it was also perfect for my plans. I told Sango that I was ready, and we proceeded to make preparations. On Sunday morning, a few hours after dawn, I lay in wait.literally. An old trunk of Sango's had been secured; its legs and one of its hinges had been smashed. We were ready. I climbed into the chest and Sango shut the lid. We had already informed a handy but dull footman that it needed repairs, and he had eagerly agreed to take the trunk to town for the "two pretty princesses". Being rich does have its perks. I was about to find out whether they were worth sacrificing for freedom. I heard Sango remark, "I'd like to have it back by the end of the day, please", and knew that the footman had arrived to collect his cargo. I was ready for this. As I was carried out inside the trunk, my last waves of foreboding melted away. Though I wasn't completely sure I was doing the right thing, I knew that I was about to find out what real life was like; living, unsheltered and without restraints.
Chapter 2
AN: Hope you like this so far! I'd like to thank my TIP roomie, Aparna, for allowing me to use 'I and A', the title of a piece of music she wrote, for this fic.
Disclaimer: I don't even own the TITLE!
I suppose I'm getting a little ahead of myself, though. I'll go back to right before Sesshomaru invaded, when my father had been his most overbearing, and when everything was getting to be too much for me to endure.
"Please, father, if I could just take the morning off, spend it outside in the garden.I'm so sick of needlework, and it's such a beautiful day." "I said no, and I meant it! Now go to your lessons, you impudent girl! I need to attend to important matters!" I stared at him, in a state of shock, feeling as though my world was teetering over the edge of a cliff, about to plunge into disaster. I loved my father, though I had always been second best and just a girl in his eyes. He had always made it clear that he respected me for my intelligence and sharp wit, and though he tired of my willpower, he still seemed to be proud of it, against his better judgement. But now. he had told me to my face that I wasn't important enough to take up his precious time. With my lip quivering, I gave him my most deadly glare, turned on my heels, and fled, struggling to keep from weeping. My thoughts flew to my only conceivable source of comfort: Sango. She would be my solace. She would relieve me from my sorrow, and help me determine my course of action.
Sango was holed up in her room, cross-stitching. Unlike me, she actually seemed to enjoy it, much to the delight of our teachers and nurses.
"Good Morning, Kagome!" was her cheerful salutation. Once she saw the look on my face, she stopped sewing, choosing instead to jump up and embrace me.
"Oh, Kagome.what happened? Was it your father again?"
"He's always been strict, but lately.he's been downright cruel to me. I don't know why it bothers me so much, but Sango, he's the only family I've got left! And I'm so tired of being here. You're the only one I can really talk to, but the only time we get to talk is at night, before bed. During the day, we're attending pointless, pointless lessons.the teachers are all monks! They believe girls should be kept subdued and in submission; seen and not heard, for heaven's sake! All day long, the idiotic 'ladies' in here talk incessantly about catching husbands and looking hot in their new gowns, and these are the people I'm supposed to be friends with. My father hates it that I'm not exactly like them. I just can't be that. I'm not a perfect little porcelain doll!"
"It can't be that bad, sweet. Your father does love you; it's undeniable. Aren't you overreacting just a little? I'll always be here for you to talk to, and the life of a princess is something any one of those ladies would give up their favorite gowns for!"
"I know I sound really ungrateful, but it's not just that. I can't say anything if it's not about dresses or marriages, and all the while, the kingdom is failing. I know it, though no one says anything to me. Father grows grayer and more wan by the day, and I hear the servants talking. They say that servant work is actually the only work anyone can find, and outside the palace, the crops aren't growing, and children are dying. They say that it could be a curse, a plague on the house of Higurashi!" With this last outburst, I collapsed on the bed, weeping.
"Shush, it's okay, it's going to be alright." Sango attempted to comfort me, hugging me and allowing me to cry. Eventually I was able to sit up and dry my eyes. Turning to my dearest friend, I realized something strange: far from looking consoling, Sango's expression was one of extreme confusion and turmoil, as though she was having an incredible internal altercation with herself. She was definitely trying to make up her mind about something, something important. Finally, she turned to me, and remarked, "Your situation's much worse than I thought it was, and all this trouble is clearly taking a toll on you. Maybe I have a solution. I know you can't continue to live this way, and maybe it's not the right thing to do, but I think you should leave the palace." "WHAT? Do you have any idea what my father would DO to me if I were caught??!!!" "Of course I do, but really.what other options do you have? Do you want to continue being a prisoner in your own home?" she replied. Her last response stuck with me after I left her room that night, and continued to vex me over the following week. I desperately wanted to escape, but would that really solve any problems? What about the kingdom, and its problems? I knew that it could be seen as an act of inconceivable selfishness; leaving just as my land entered its darkest times. Finally, I came to a conclusion: I would sneak out of the castle early one morning, and return later on that day, so that no one would even guess that I had ever left, and so that I could see what the outside world was truly like. I would determine a better course of action after I knew what waited for me outside. Deciding which day to leave, however, proved to be a bigger task than I thought it would be: I would have to choose a day on which everyone in the castle was madly busy, and would be far too flustered to notice the absence of one silly little princess. I settled on the following Sunday. One of the aforementioned and ridiculously silly ladies of the castle was to be married to an equally moronic but rather handsome knight, and everyone, including my father, was involved. My role was miniscule and insulting: stay out of the way while the adults took care of everything. Though it may have been belittling, it was also perfect for my plans. I told Sango that I was ready, and we proceeded to make preparations. On Sunday morning, a few hours after dawn, I lay in wait.literally. An old trunk of Sango's had been secured; its legs and one of its hinges had been smashed. We were ready. I climbed into the chest and Sango shut the lid. We had already informed a handy but dull footman that it needed repairs, and he had eagerly agreed to take the trunk to town for the "two pretty princesses". Being rich does have its perks. I was about to find out whether they were worth sacrificing for freedom. I heard Sango remark, "I'd like to have it back by the end of the day, please", and knew that the footman had arrived to collect his cargo. I was ready for this. As I was carried out inside the trunk, my last waves of foreboding melted away. Though I wasn't completely sure I was doing the right thing, I knew that I was about to find out what real life was like; living, unsheltered and without restraints.