The Legend of Zelda: The Return
Chapter 9
My life has gone from bad to something so awful they haven't invented a word for it yet.
In fact I just have.
Link. That'll be the word.
Ten years from now, people won't say "things have gone from bad to worse" anymore. Nope. They'll say "things have gone from worse to Link." That's what they'll say.
"Where are we going?" I shout at Nabooru over the sound of the wind and Epona's hooves on the ground.
"Kokiri's forest," she shouts back. "It's the designated spot to regroup." I stiffen.
Kokiri's forest . . .
Why did it have to be Kokiri's forest?
My life's gone from worse to Link all right.
I remember . . .
The last day I was in Kokiri's forest. It had started out as a typical day for the kid who didn't have a fairy. Woke up, and went out to play. By myself. As per usual. The fact that it was my birthday made no difference in my routine. Nobody but Saria knew or cared anyway. And that day Saria was still on one of her excursions to her special place. That should have been my first clue it wasn't going to be a good day. My days were never good when Saria was at her special place, because she was my only shield from Mido's pranks.
But I actually managed to avoid Mido that morning, and headed straight into the Lost Woods. I had intended to find the Skull Kids and play with them, but they were gone somewhere too. I didn't think much of it at the time, but looking back, they were as close to the Deku Tree as the Kokiri were, and they probably realized something was going on.
That should have been my second sign that this just wasn't going to be my day.
So I spent the rest of the morning and most of the afternoon practicing with my slingshot, imagining my targets were Mido's head, and wishing I had a real bow and quiver. Eventually though, I got bored and decided to head home. It took me awhile, as I'd wandered further into the woods than I'd intended and it was twilight by the time I made it out. I headed back to my house, but then I saw the oddest thing.
The fact that all the Kokiri were gathered right outside the entrance to the Great Deku Tree's glade and a few of them were crying should have tipped me off that this was just not going to be my day.
But I didn't realize it until Mido laid eyes on me and started talking.
Apparently the Great Deku Tree had died sometime that day while I was in the Lost Woods.
Mido demanded to know where I had been.
I told him.
He called me a liar. Several times. Then he called me a murderer. At the top of his lungs. If I hadn't been so shocked by the whole situation I probably would have hit him right then and there. Maybe would have saved myself some grief.
The problem was, I was too shocked and upset to even deny it.
The Great Deku Tree was dead. The Great Deku Tree used to be the only one I could talk to besides Saria (on the odd days when I could sneak past Mido, the self-appointed Deku Tree guard). I had been feeling adventurous and defiant one day, so I broke the rule about waiting until you're summoned, snuck past Mido (I threw a rock at him and then hid so he blamed the first Kokiri he laid eyes on and took off after them. I waltzed into the Glade like I owned it).
And you know what?
The Great Deku Tree was glad to see me.
He said he was glad I had come.
And he said I could come whenever I wanted (he said he couldn't do anything about Mido, though. He said every Kokiri has a place in the forest, and Mido had chosen that as his place. I'd just have to sneak past him. The Great Deku Tree, however, did not approve of me throwing rocks . . .). So I sat there for a whole afternoon and half the evening just talking to the Deku Tree, and it made me feel good for a little bit.
And I went back often.
The fact that he had died hit my like a ton of bricks and by the time I realized what Mido was saying, it was too late. He'd been saying it loudly, and I hadn't been denying it, and the rest of the Kokiri were starting to believe him.
They were starting to believe that I had killed the Deku Tree.
I still remember Mido's words.
"He's always been different than us! He's always been a freak! No real Kokiri would have killed the Deku Tree! It had to have been him! He's not even a Kokiri!" I had shouted at him that I was a Kokiri, but without a fairy to back it up it was an empty claim. He kept shouting. And I lost it. I leapt at him with my fists clenched and we fought for a little bit.
It wasn't much of a fight.
I was eleven years old and he was in that perpetual state of eleven-year-oldness that all Kokiri reach. It was clumsy and useless and would have been comical to an adult.
To Mido it was proof. He kept shouting as we fought. No real Kokiri would attack another Kokiri. No real Kokiri would fight with someone else like this. And no real Kokiri would kill the Deku Tree.
Somebody split us up.
We glared at each other.
He pointed at me and said:
"There's only one person here who's not a real Kokiri. He's the one who killed the Great Deku Tree." And everyone murmured their agreement.
At that point I would have fought each and every one of them . . .
But for some reason at that point I actually listened to that little voice that tells me when I'm being stupid.
I didn't fight, I fled.
I ran all the way back to my house and then burst into it, throwing my favorite things onto my blanket, crying the whole time.
The Great Deku Tree was dead.
And everyone thought I did it.
I don't know what I was thinking at the time as I wrapped my things up in that blanket and then headed for the exit to Kokiri Forest. At the time I was still convinced that I was a Kokiri. Kokiri couldn't leave the forest. They'd die.
Maybe, somewhere deep down, I knew I wasn't a real Kokiri . . .
In the same place, deep down, where I knew the Sages' crazy story about me was true.
That elusive, obscure part of you that's buried so deep inside you, you can't find it half the time. But it's there, and at times like those it lets you know what you need to know.
One way or another, I was leaving the Forest.
Whether or not I'd die as soon as I set foot outside it.
I ran out the exit and made it halfway across the wooden bridge that lead to the outside world before someone stopped me.
Saria stepped out of the shadows. She took in my tear-stained face and ragged breathing and immediately her face melted into the most comforting expression I've ever seen.
"I'm sorry Link," she said. "I wish it didn't have to be like this . . ."
"I didn't do it!" I half shouted half sobbed desperately. The words echoed back oddly. Bad enough the rest of the Kokiri populace thought I did it, I couldn't have stood it if Saria did too. "Saria please, you've got to believe me . . ."
"I know, Link," she said, smiling softly at me. "That's not what I meant. I know you didn't do it. Nobody did it. It was just time for the Great Deku Tree to die. The others will understand that once the Deku Tree Sprout grows. They don't really blame you, they're just upset." I shifted the weight of my makeshift pack on my back and took a deep breath.
"I don't care," I said. "I can't stay here anymore. Mido's right. I'm not a real Kokiri. I can't stay here anymore. I have to go. I just . . . I have to."
"I know," she said. "I've always known you'd leave this place, Link. You're . . . different than us."
"You don't have to rub it in," I whispered. She smiled and walked up to me, kissing me on the cheek and pressing a pouch into my hand.
"I'm not," she said. "Someday you'll understand Link. Not today but someday."
"What's this?" I asked, staring in confusion at the pouch.
"Your birthday present," she said. "It's a magic pouch. You can put anything in it, no matter how big, and keep as many things as you want in it." I opened it up and looked in.
"Hey there's something in here." It was my first Ocarina. It wasn't anywhere near as nice as the Ocarina of Time, but it was still nice.
"Think of me when you play it," Saria said. "So you never forget . . ." And then she started to cry. I dropped everything but the Ocarina and threw my arms around her neck, hugging her fiercely.
I shoved my whole blanket full of things into the pouch and then tied it to my waist. A mumbled thank you was the only goodbye I could manage without losing my nerve. Then I turned around and ran out of the Kokiri Forest.
And told myself I'd never go back.
Not willingly.
And yet, rising up out of the night's inky blackness is the very same exit I ran out of a little over six years ago.
"Nabooru stop," I say. She ignores me. "Nabooru! Stop!" I cry. I struggle to break her iron grip. Unluckily for me, I haven't slept at all tonight, and I've been losing blood steadily all night. I'm just not strong enough. "We can't take Epona in there," I tell her desperately. "Kokiri's forest can do funny things to people and animals who aren't supposed to be there." Epona knows this. She stops just outside the entrance and refuses to go any further. I breathe a sigh of relief as Nabooru and I dismount.
Well . . . Nabooru dismounts.
I kind of fall out of the saddle.
Shaking her head, Nabooru offers me a hand up. I refuse it and get up on my own, albeit unsteadily. She gives me an approving look. I raise an eyebrow at the look then turn to Epona, stroking her muzzle gently.
"Take care of yourself girl," I tell her. "I'll call for you when I need you, okay?" Epona whinnies her agreement. I give her a good natured slap on her rump and she trots off and around the corner. Out of sight. I watch her go and fight the loneliness I suddenly feel.
"Do we really have to go in there?" I ask Nabooru, unable to make myself turn around and look at the entrance to Kokiri Forest.
"Stalfos in your closet, kid?" She asks me. "They can't go away until you open the doors and let them out." I don't move. "Come on, kid," she says. "We can't stay out here. Dark Link will be looking for you. You'll be safe in the Kokiri's Forest for now, until we find out what happened to the others. Besides, you're arm needs to be looked at and stitched up." She grabs me by the shoulders and shoves me forward for that first, reluctant step. I hold my breath and step over the edge and into Kokiri Forest.
By the time we've crossed the bridge and stepped into the little village, the Kokiri know we're here. Travelers are a rare sight in Kokiri forest – mostly due to the dangerousness of coming here if you haven't been invited. I'm fine because the Great Deku Tree himself took me in. I assume Nabooru's fine because she's a Sage. Either way, we're in Kokriri's forest, we're new, we're grown ups, and we're suddenly surrounded by a bunch of hyper active midgets dressed in green.
Sweet merciful Din . . . was I ever that short?
As I look around at the Kokiri, recognizing each and every one of their faces (there's the twins, the Know-It-All Brothers . . . Farore. Even the kid from the shop is out here), I'm struck by a sudden realization . . . in the form of their lack of realization.
They don't recognize me.
They don't know who I am.
I don't understand. It's not like I look much different . . . bigger, yeah, but I've still got blonde hair, blue eyes, long ears . . . it's not like I've changed the way I look. I blink suddenly.
Maybe they don't recognize me, because they're not expecting me to be big . . .
Kokiri don't grow up . . . they couldn't really know that I did . . .
I realize in sudden panic that one of the Know-It-All Brothers is asking Nabooru if she's ever seen a kid named Link out in the rest of the world. Nabooru grins at him.
"As a matter of fact," she says, "I have. He's . . ."
"Got a job at an archery shop in Castletown," I interrupt her. "Or did last time we saw him, right Nabooru?" I look at her pleadingly. She sighs and rolls her eyes.
"Whatever," she says.
"So he's alive?" The kid from the shop asks with wide eyes.
"Yeah," I grunt. "Something like that."
"We've got – "
" – to go tell Mido!" Squeak the twins. "He'll be so – "
" – excited!"
"Oh yeah," I mutter under my breath, "nothing like knowing your scapegoat's still alive to cheer you right up." I sigh and start wading through the Kokiri. I'm so tired . . . I just want to sleep.
"We're not going to your house," Nabooru says, catching up to me. "We've got to go to the Forest Temple. Just follow . . ."
"I know the way," I tell her. "Saria's special place. I know where it is." We finally managed to disentangle ourselves from the excited Kokiri and head towards the Lost Woods – much to the dismay of the Kokiri, who are shouting warnings at us about getting lost forever and turning into a Stalchild. I won't get lost.
I know the Lost Woods like the back of my hand.
We're about halfway to Saria's special place when the twins pass us, smiling and giggling and waving as they go. They always did take a morbid pleasure out of people turning into Stalchilds.
I'm more concerned with why they were in here.
They were going to go see Mido.
I sigh.
"What?" Nabooru asks. "You lost?"
"Hardly," I answer. "It's just . . . nevermind. Nothing important. I'm bigger than him now." We continue on our way without another word.
Until we arrive at the turn we have to take to get to the Sacred Meadow. Waiting there, by the pool of water, is Mido. As soon as he sees us, his eyes widen and he leaps up to run over and stand in front of the turn. I sigh. What is it with him and guarding stuff? I walk up to him.
"All right, Mido, move it or lose it, we've got to get through," I say. He frowns at me – probably wondering how I know his name – and crosses his arms stubbornly. I frown right back down at him.
I can't believe there was ever a time I was afraid of this kid . . .
He's so small . . .
I've dreamed of this day for so long . . . the day when I was bigger than Mido . . .
I could pick him up and toss him into that little lake over there . . .
"Don't even think it," Navi hisses at me from under my hat. I sigh. How does she do that?
"Nobody's allowed in here except friends of Saria," Mido says stubbornly, his bold tone belied by the fact his wide eyes are taking in my multitude of weapons.
"We are friends of Saria, Mido," Nabooru says. "Just let us through."
"No," he says. I've got to give the little punk credit, he's braver than I remember. "You have to prove it." Nabooru takes a threatening step forward, probably planning on doing what I wanted and just throwing him into the pond, but I stop her with a hand and pull out the Ocarina of Time. She raises and eyebrow at me. I put it to my lips and start to play.
Mido's eyes widen as the first few notes of Saria's Song drift up on the night air.
When I finish, Mido's staring at me, startled.
"That's Saria's Song!" He cries. I put the Ocarina back into my pouch.
"Exactly," I say. "And you know as well as I do, that she doesn't teach that song to just anyone." He stares at us for a minute longer, then reluctantly steps aside to let us through.
"About time," Nabooru mutters as she storms past. I move to go after her, but stop at the tug on my tunic.
"Hey Mister," Mido says. I turn to raise an eyebrow at him. He hesitates. "Have you . . . the Twins said that . . . that you know Link." I turn back to face him fully.
"I do," I say carefully. "Why?" Mido shifts his weight from one foot to the other and his face takes on a guilty expression I'm not used to seeing on his face.
"Is he okay?" He asks. I shift my weight, but for a different reason than Mido did.
"He was a little while ago," I tell him. "Got a job in Castletown, made some friends. Not doing bad, all things considered." Mido hesitates again.
"Can . . . can you give him a message for me?" Mido asks. "Next time you see him?" My eyebrow goes up even higher.
"Sure thing," I say. "What message?" Mido looks at me, his eyes bright and shiny with what I'm pretty sure are tears.
"Can you tell him I'm sorry?" He asks. "For . . . for everything? He'll know what I'm talking about."
His words hit me like a punch in the stomach.
I know what he's talking about all right . . .
I can't believe he's talking about it . . .
I open my mouth to say something to him, but Nabooru suddenly reappears.
"You coming, or not, kid?" She demands impatiently.
"Yeah," I say, tearing my gaze away from Mido. "I . . . I'm coming."
"You'll tell him, right?" Mido asks desperately.
"Yeah," I say again. "Yeah I'll tell him. I'm sure he'll appreciate it." Mido exhales loudly.
"Thanks Mister," he says, then frowns. "You know, it's kinda funny . .. but when I look at you . . . for some reason . . . I think of him . . ."
I hurry after Nabooru before he can explore that particular thought any further.
"What was that all about?" Nabooru asks when I catch up. I kick at a rock unfortunate enough to get in my way.
"He apologized . . ." I say. "I can't believe he apologized . . . and he meant it . . ." I try to say more, to explain a bit better, but a wave of dizziness suddenly rushes over me and I stumble, the strength bleeding from my legs.
The night's finally catching up to me.
It's too much to handle . . . Dark Link . . . Malon . . . Bruiser . . . Mido . . .
I've lost too much blood . . .
I faint.
xxx
It's still dark when I regain consciousness. It takes me a minute to get my bearings and take stock of my situation.
I'm wrapped up in a warm blanket and laying on the ground underneath the broken ledge of what was once the entrance to the Forest Temple. I'm in Saria's Special place. My arm is bandaged tightly, and upon closer inspection it's also stitched up. There are three other lumps in the darkness. Upon closer inspection these turn out to be Nabooru, Zelda and Impa. The others are nowhere to be seen.
They mustn't have made it out . . .
Zelda's face is barely visible in the moonlight that manages to filter down into the Lost Woods. I watch her sleep for awhile and wonder about what Malon said to me.
But the Hero of Time business isn't the only thing Bruiser told me about you.
Well what else could Bruiser have told her? Navi said the Sages told me everything . . .
Not that I really believe that.
I know Zelda's hiding something.
Maybe that's what Bruiser told Malon. I should have asked . . . I'd love to know the crazy princess' deep dark secret.
I shake my head and start towards the exit of the special place.
I don't really think I should be staring that hard at other girls when I've got a girlfriend . . . Malon got jealous when I told her about the Gerudos. I'd love to see her face if she saw me watching Zelda sleep.
"Mmmm . . . where are we going?" Navi asks sleepily, peeping out from under my hat.
"Just for a walk," I tell her. "I need to think. Go back to sleep." She disappears again. That's the best thing about Navi. She'll do whatever I tell her when she's sleepy.
Maybe I should start drugging her . . .
With that oh so entertaining thought in mind I continue my walk. I told Navi I wanted to think, but I don't really. My mind's such a jumble right now there's not a lot of sense coming out of it.
So I just walk, losing myself in the familiarity of the Lost Woods.
This was my home for so long . . . 11 years. Or maybe only ten . . . or nine . . . how old was I, anyway, when I was taken in by the Great Deku Tree? Was I a newborn? One? Two? Maybe even three? Can you remember things that happened when you were three? I don't remember anything before the Kokiri Forest . . . Navi said something about a war. I think I remember hearing some stories about it . . . the Sheikah and the Gorons on one side of it, the Zoras and the Gerudos on the other, and the Hylians torn right down the middle. Everybody fighting everybody else, double crossing, backstabbing and civil unrest . . . it wasn't a happy time if the stories are at all accurate. Eventually the King of Hyrule (Zelda's father I guess) somehow managed to bring about a peace. At least with everyone but the Gerudos. The Gerudos supposedly retreated back into their desert.
I wonder how much Ganondorf had to do with that war . . .
He was the King of the Gerudos, wasn't he?
The Sages would remember the War . . . well, most of them. Saria, Zelda and Ruto wouldn't . . . but the others might. I frown at that thought. Did Darunia, and Impa ever fight against Nabooru? Did they ever hate each other? They almost would have had to . . .
But they're such good friends . . .
Hmmm . . . well that's interesting.
I've somehow wound up on the bridge that leads out of Kokiri Forest.
I move to the middle of the bridge and slide down to sit on the cool wooden planks. I pull out my Ocarina and fit it to my lips, closing my eyes as the first few notes of the Song of Time drift up on the night air. Funny . . . ever since the first time I went to my Temple – the Temple of Time I realize now – I've heard this song. I never really knew it had a name . . .
My mind drifts back to thoughts of the war that happened before I can remember. Maybe that's where I should start looking . . . nobody can tell me who I am, or where I come from . . . but maybe I can find out. I know that my mother at least was alive during the war . . . and she knew about the Great Deku Tree . . . she knew I'd be safe here. Maybe if I can find out . . . something . . . about what made her come here . . . I'll find out who, and what I am.
Maybe . . .
"What . . . what are you doing here?"
I blink and stop my playing, turning my head to see who's talking.
Mido stands at the other edge of the bridge, a blanket stuffed with his things over his back. I pull the Ocarina away from my lips.
"I needed to get away from the . . . from my friends for a while," I say. "What are you doing here?" I eye the make-shift bag over his back. "Going camping?"
"I'm leaving," he says, steeling his nerve and starting past me. I casually stretch out my leg and put it in his way.
"Why?" I ask. "Why would you want to leave the forest? You're safe here. There are things going on out in the world that a kid like you couldn't handle."
"Saria's out there," he says, trying to find a way past me. "I have to go find her. They said that she was in trouble."
"They?" I ask with a raised eyebrow.
"The girl . . . the princess, and that other scary woman."
"Zelda and Impa," I say.
"Yes," he says. "And I have to go now. I have to go find Saria."
"And how are you planning on doing that, Mido?" I ask incredulously. "You've never been outside the Kokiri Forest. You'll get lost as soon as you round the corner out there."
"I'll . . . I'll find Link. He'll help me. He knows his way." I shake my head at him.
"Amazing faith for someone who was so mean to him while he was here," I say, doing my best to keep my bitterness out of my voice. Mido winces.
"That won't matter," he says. "Not if Saria's in trouble . . . Link and Saria were friends . . . he'll help me." He jumps over my leg and continues on his way. I get to my feet and shove my Ocarina into my pocket.
"Mido, if you leave the forest, you'll die," I say. "You know that. You know you can't leave, this is foolish. Kokiri can't live away from the Deku Tree."
"Link didn't die," Mido says, glaring at me. "You said so yourself. You said he's doing fine. If Link can survive, then so can I. He's as much a Kokiri as I am."
Those are eight words I never in my life would have thought would come out of Mido's mouth . . .
I stare at him, too surprised and shocked to even register that he's moving hurriedly towards the exit . . .
He thinks I'm a Kokiri . . .
He honestly thinks I'm a Kokiri . . .
And he's going to get himself killed because of it . . .
"Mido wait!" I cry, leaping after him. He bolts for the exit, but my legs are longer. He's almost there when I grab the back of his little green tunic and pick him up, raising him up to eye level with me and turning him around.
"Link survived because he's not a Kokiri," I say. Mido glares at me.
"How do you know?" He demands. "Link is a Kokiri! Even if he didn't have a fairy! He's one of us!"
"No," I say slowly, surprised at how much admitting it still hurts. I always am. "I'm not." Mido stares at me in confusion for a moment, then his eyes slowly widen as realization sinks in.
"Link?" He whispers. I set him back on the ground and sink into a sitting position with a sigh.
"That's my name," I say lamely. "Don't wear it out." Mido casts a frightened gaze out at the world he almost walked into, then walks over to sit across from me on the bridge.
"So . . . so you're really not a Kokiri?" He asks.
"Nope," I say.
"What are you?" He asks. I shrug.
"Wish I knew," I say. I wonder if he'll rub this in. Six years ago he would have . . . but he seems to have changed a fair bit since then. I wait to see what he'll say.
"I bet you're something cool." I blink and turn to look at him.
"What?" I ask, surprised.
"Something cool," he says. "Like . . . a Gerudo . . . or a Sheikah . . . or something neat like that."
"Or a cross between a Goron and a Zora," I say with a crooked grin. He makes a face at me.
"You're ugly enough," he says.
But you know what? I don't think he meant it . . .
I rest my chin on my knees.
"So they really said Saria didn't make it out?" I ask, feeling deflated at the thought. Mido nods, concern flashing over his tiny features.
"What's going on, Link?" He asks. "Out in the world? Why is Saria in trouble?"
"Why is Saria ever in trouble?" I ask softly. "She's trying to protect me . . ."
"From what?" Mido asks. "What could hurt you? You're so big now . . ." I smile slightly. Sometimes I miss being a kid . . .
"There are people and things out there a lot bigger than me," I say. I point at the bandage on my arm, peeking through under my torn tunic. "And there are a lot of them. But in particular there's one, very, very bad man who wants to hurt me. He needs to hurt me. Saria and the other people I'm with trapped him somewhere, and if he kills me then he can get free again and do very, very bad stuff to everyone else. Even the Kokiri."
"She's like that, isn't she?" Mido asks, his eyes intent on mine. "Always trying to protect people . . . I never really understood it. I always thought it was the places that needed protecting." He made a face. "I didn't do a very good job this time, though," he adds.
"Sure you did," I say. "You wouldn't let us pass until I proved to you that we knew Saria."
"Oh sure, it worked for you and your friend," he said. "But the scary lady just picked me up and threw me in the pond." I try really hard not to laugh.
Sometimes, I love Impa. When I've got my mirth back under control and look back up at Mido, he appears to have come to some sort of conclusion.
"Well," he says, "if Saria thought you were worth protecting, then you've got to be protected." Uh-oh . . . here it comes. "And since Saria's not here to protect you, I guess I'm just going to have to."
"Mido, I can handle it," I say. "No one here's going to try and hurt me. I can protect myself." He frowns at me and I sigh. Doesn't matter what I say.
My new bodyguard is my childhood bully . . .
Great.
"But only on one condition," Mido says suddenly. I blink at him and wait for him to continue. "You have to protect Saria when you get out of here. You have to find her and get her out of trouble." I smile at him.
"Done and done," I say, getting to my feet. Mido follows suit.
"It's really too bad you don't have a fairy," he says, unable to resist getting in that one last snide comment. Some things never change. I raise an eyebrow at him and pull my hat off.
"Huh? What's going on?" Navi demands, peering bleary eyed around. "Where are we?" She spots the exit to Kokiri Forest and leaps up off my head in alarm. "Link!" She cries. "You're not going to leave without them are you? Over my dead body!" Mido stares at Navi with his eyes wide and his jaw agape.
"You . . . you . . . but . . ."
I pull my hat back down over my head (and Navi, much to her irritation) and grin at him.
"I might not be a Kokiri," I tell him. "But I've definitely got a fairy."