Left Behind

Disclaimer! Rurouni Kenshin doesn't belong to me, but to Nobuhiro Watsuki. Darn, maybe some day ^_^x

Left Behind, Chapter 2: Broken and Mended

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"No!!" I ran into my house and up to my room. I didn't even make it to my bed. Once I was past the door, I collasped and broke out in sobs.

I was broken.

Lost.

Confused.

It was a good thing that we were on spring break that week, because I didn't come out of my room for five striaght days. Those five days were such a blur. I hardly ate or drank and I never left my room, not even to go to the bathroom. And I didn't have to, what with all that food I ate, there was nothing to go through my digestive system. My father had no idea what to do or say, so he let my friends do the comforting, but I do remember him telling me that some day I'd see him again.

Tae and her little sister, Tsubame, came everyday.

"Kaoru-chan," Tae pleaded, "you must eat something. Please drink a little miso soup. Tsubame did her best to make this." The two always brought me some food and sometime, even managed to make me eat some of it.

Okon came a few times as well. Her words of comfort did not help much, but I knew she didn't know what else to say and it was the best she could do. "Kaoru-chan, you're lucky, you know that?" she began, "Kenshin hugged you and promised to write you every week. Shiro doesn't even talk to me anymore, much less hug me!" It sounded like she was jealous of me. But what would she do if her Shiro was to move away, never to return?

Even Yahiko tried to help. "Oi, Busu!! Get up!! You're growing fatter and uglier by the minute!!"

"I know." I replied miserably. "That's why Kenshin left me."

My little brother sighed. I guess he thought I would chase him around and hit him with my bokken, but I was really out of it. I had no desire nor energy to run or yell or beat him up.

All those hours I spent lying on my bed, crying, thinking. Why had he left me? I knew that Hiko wouldn't force him to leave. Perhaps he wanted to leave.

Perhaps he wanted to leave me.

But why? Was I not enough a reason for him to stay? Apparently not, since he left. Why did he leave me? Am I too violent? So I hit him a few times in our years together. Perhaps yelled at him too. But I thought that he had always known that he had meant the world to me. Was I really that ugly like Yahiko always said? I got up and looked at my reflection. I saw sapphire blue eyes, dull no longer with the light that used to shine within them. I saw long raven hair hanging at my side in a limp braid. Dirty from five days of no washing. I had a nice figure, long slender legs, curves in the right places. So if it wasn't my looks, then what was it? Was it my intelligence? No, it couldn't be, I was at the top of my class. Or was it because he knew I loved him and he didn't love me back. It must have been, there was no other explanation. He didn't love me, but he didn't want to reject me.

I choked on a sob and climbed back into my bed and fell into a restless slumber.

I had to get over him.

If I didn't, it would be the end of me

The next day, Friday, was the last day of my isolation and to this day, it's still a miricle how she did it. I think it was a mixture of her determination and my desire to get over him.

Tae and Tsubame came as usual and they were both surprised when I actually ate half of what they brought, "Kaoru-chan, "she said, "you're looking better today." In truth, I was feeling better, but I didn't want to do anything, but lie in bed and think some more.

After they had left, I mulled over my conclusion once again.

He doesn't love me

He'd rather leave me than love me

I began to cry again

"I come here to see you and what do I get? A blubbering tanuki girl." Her voice dripped with disguist.

Megumi.

The fox woman had come for me. I had never really liked Megumi, she was too clingy. Too clingy on my Kenshin. Geez, I mean couldn't she be clingy on someone else?

"What do you want?" I really didn't feel like listening to her talking about how 'Ken-san' could do so much better than me.

"I heard you were in here for four days. I thought I would see what pathetic excuse kept you in."

"Thanks. For. Your. Concern." My voice dripping with sarcasm, disgust and most of all, hate. Then taking a colder tone, if possible, "Now, leave"

"That's not a very nice thing to say to the person who's going to pull you out of your depression."

"What the hell could you say to make me feel better?" I really did doubt that that evil fox lady could do anything to help.

"I just hope Ken-san finds a better girl than you in Kyoto! Ohohohohohohohoho!!"

I was disgusted at her remark. What did she know about me and my feelings anyway? "You'll never know what it felt like for him to say goodbye, for him not to even look back, and I couldn't do a thing!"

It was true. For a minute, I was immobilzed, then when I finally got up, I couldn't even run after him. Her comment, equally as painful, hit me like a ton of bricks.

"You'll never know what it felt like not even to get a simple farewell!" I saw a lone tear fall from her eye. "You'll never know . . ." she trailed off. "Get up Kaoru" Kaoru. It was the first time she had ever called me by my real name. "Let us help you. You can't suffer so much and expect to get over it by yourself."

And with that she left, but I could hear her say to Yahiko, "I'm sure you can finish what I started." before leaving completely.

I counted in my head. Five . . . four . . . three . . . two . . . one . . .

"Busu!! Get up !! Did you even think that Kenshin only said goodbye to right before he left was you?" Yahiko shook me a little. "Kenshin's letter is coming in two days. Do you really want to be moping around when you read it?"

"No." I whispered hoarsely. I didn't want to be sad when I read his cheerful letter. "No!" I said again, this time with conviction. "I know what will make me feel better. Yahiko, be in the dojo in an hour. I feel like sparring with you"

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Believe it or not, sparring with Yahiko really did help. It got my mind off Kenshin and I go to laugh at Yahiko when he lost. You can bet that I sparred with Yahiko a lot.

In two days, a letter came for me. A letter form my Kenshin for me. Just for me.

Dear Kaoru-dono,

Life in Kyoto i very different from Tokyo. Shishou bought a cabin on a hill by the woods, I guess he does not want to associate with others. But there is a great clearing where I go to train. There is also a waterfall. You would love it if you were here. Forgive me, if the ink is a bit smudged, I am writing this by the waterfall. It is very calming. And it gets me away from Shishou for awhile.

School starts tomorrow. I am a little excited, but a bit nervous as well. Afterall, I do not yet have the support of good friends like in Tokyo. Give my regards to them all. I miss you.

Shishou is calling me now. I must go.

Always,
Kenshin

It was a short letter, but nonetheless improtant to me. It was then, I decided to keep every single letter he would send to me. A carefully chosen box and extra closet splace made it possible.

The next day, school started again. It was a little strange, not seeing Kenshin, I had over three fourths of my classes with him. He'd always be my parter in anything and everything. I sat through my classes blankly, almost devoid of any emotion. I was actually thinking of Kenshin. Did he make any new friends? What about girls? There was no way anyone that good-looking would go without a girlfriends too long.

In his next letter, he told me about everything. I was, afterall, his best friends. He wrote about two new friends, Soujiro and Sanosuke. One, a happy-go-lucky kid who never ceased to smile, and the other, a ruffian with a good heart. He told me about the strangest couple. A guy wrapped form head to toe in banadages and a girl with an extremely low kimono. He wrote all about his first week at school, but not once did he mention a girl for him.

And I was relieved maybe we were meant to be.

But I would prove to be sadly mistaken.

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A/N: So how was it? Like I said before, I tried to shape it like the Kyoto arc, was it any good? I don't think that the beginning was that angsty, but more than the first chapter. The story's not going to be much romance, mostly angst, but not like really intense angst, if you get what I mean.

PLEASE REVIEW!!