Chapter 33 - A Promise of Freedom?
Hey there everyone, the note is at the end this time, read the chapter first and you will understand why.
Thanks for the reviews, please read and enjoy. Review if you wish. I know I do.
Take care.
****************************************************************
Jane returned from Snape's chambers, bathed and dressed, to find Dumbledore sitting beside the Potions Master who was still lying wearily in the hospital bed, not yet fully recovered. "I am sorry Severus, I wasn't aware you had been hurt, let alone of the seriousness of your injuries or I wouldn't have questioned you last evening." The older man apologised, unaware of Jane's quiet return.
"That is quite alright Headmaster. You weren't to know." The Potions Master said wearily.
"No it's not alright." Jane asserted from the door, angry that Snape would let Dumbledore off so lightly.
Both men turned and looked at the girl watching them. "Jane, please don't be rude."
"I'm sorry Severus, but I want him to know it does matter and that it isn't alright. He sends you off without any consideration for your safety, and it isn't good enough."
Dumbledore looked sadly at the girl who just accused him. He felt terrible that his Potions Master had been hurt again, and worse because he was unable to protect the man, particularly given the important role Snape played in his own grand daughter's happiness. "I am afraid Jane is right Severus. It isn't good enough. I think your period of usefulness as a spy has come to an end and the time has come for us to find a way to combat Voldemort's power over you."
Snape looked at the older man, not quite able to understand what he meant. Then, as awareness dawned on him, that Dumbledore meant to free him from the obligation of returning to Voldemort, a small flare of excitement lit in Snape's soul. Could it be that there might be a way to free him from the torment of a foolish mistake made a lifetime ago? Certainly, if anyone could find a way to weaken Voldemort's grip on him, it would be the Headmaster. "Headmaster, are you sure?" He held his breath, waiting for an answer; barely willing to hope it might be true.
"Yes, Severus, I am. I don't wish to see you hurt any more than Jane does. I can't imagine that stopping his friendly reminders will be easy, I know of no one who has successfully broken from their commitment to him yet, and you are perhaps the one who has tried the hardest, but I think it is time that we at least attempted to find something that will go some way to protecting you from harm even if we can't stop him calling altogether."
The joy of release flooded though the Potions Master, his injuries seeming somehow less significant now that he would be freed of the necessity of attending any more of Voldemort's punishment sessions. He no longer had an obligation to the Headmaster to fulfil, now he only had to attend his 'Master' until a solution could be found for the damn mark on his forearm, and that solution couldn't come fast enough for the weary man.
Snape noticed, with some interest and more concern that his hands were still shaking. If the torture continued for much longer, it was quite likely that his future as a Potions Master would also be at risk. Then what would he do?
"Headmaster, are you really sure?" Snape could hardly believe it, he hardly dared to hope that the man's words were true.
Jane, still standing by the door, was just as surprised, but was also still a little sceptical of the Headmaster's motive for promising something he couldn't provide; maybe it was just to transfer the guilt from him back to Severus. Maybe, by freeing the Potions Master from his duties as a spy, without providing a method of overcoming Voldemort's power over the tortured man, he could rationalise allowing him to go when called, without being burdened by the guilt that obviously plagued him as a result of the current arrangements. Particularly when the most recent visits had almost resulted in Severus' death.
"I am Severus. Not that I think finding a solution will be easy." The old wizard stood and rested his hand on Snape's shoulder. "Rest boy. Take the time to properly recover this time. I don't want you damaging yourself further. Your importance in the coming fight may now be reduced, but your importance here, as a teacher and a friend is no less than it was before." Elderly blue eyes glittered, and met dark disbelieving ones. "You are valued here for your skills and talents as a wizard in general, and in potions in particular; not just for the information you provide, and I am sorry if I made you feel that wasn't the case."
Dumbledore moved to the door, and paused beside Jane. "Take care of him Jane, you are the first person he has allowed himself to care for in many years." His words were quiet so that the man in the bed couldn't hear them. "I am glad he has found someone."
"Perhaps you are." Jane answered, not yet trusting the older man.
**********
Snape recovered slowly. His injuries had been serious, and even Madam Pomfrey's healing talents had been unable to affect a rapid recovery. It gave the surly man the opportunity to consider what life free from spying would be like, and he came to the conclusion that it would be strangely pleasant, particularly with Jane being part of it now.
Joy at living wasn't something he had been prepared to entertain before and now that the opportunity arose to do so, he would have to carefully consider his options. There were choices open to him now that he would never have considered viable before. He sighed, and contemplated the girl sitting beside him - she had certainly thrived in the environment. Would it be fair to drag her away again, just when she was growing comfortable with the current arrangement?
"Jane."
"Yes Severus."
"Do you like it here?"
Jane gazed at him trying to understand why he was asking such a strange question. "Of course."
"Really?"
"Yes, why wouldn't I?"
"Because it isn't your world."
"No," Jane agreed. "It's better." She smiled.
Snape wanted to know if Jane was only being enthusiastic because it was his world and she enjoyed being with him. "What if I wasn't here?" He asked quietly.
Jane jumped up, looking stricken. "What's wrong? Are you all right? Is there something you aren't telling me?" Her face was pale.
Snape hadn't considered the alternative possible meanings of his words, but Jane's reaction made him realise he had been a fool. He had been surprised by the girl's overreaction, then he remembered that she had already lost one parent, and what that loss had meant for her life. He mentally kicked himself for not thinking, and tried to calm the girl.
"Jane, stop. There is nothing wrong, and I am not planning on leaving you." He watched as she barely controlled the tears of relief. "No, I was just wondering if you would perhaps prefer to live elsewhere."
He realised he had done it again, spoken without thinking, when Jane pulled away from the bed. "You want to send me back!" She accused.
"No. Jane, I was just thinking that there is no real reason for us to stay here. WE could go and live elsewhere, not right now, but soon, after the final battle." He suggested, wondering if Jane would ever recover from the trauma of her youth. Even after months of care at Hogwarts, she was still jumpy, and prone to overreaction at the first sign of trouble.
"But you work here."
"Jane, my skills are such that I could work anywhere. I was just wanting to know if you would prefer to live a more normal life."
Jane shrugged and sat down, relieved, but still looking slightly tense. "Would you care to explain just what a normal life is?" She glanced up at him, then lowered her eyes and smiled slightly, finally calming again.
At least the tempests left as quickly as they arrived, Snape thought. He smiled in return, and then, as amusement overwhelmed him at the concept of them trying to live a 'normal' life together, he chuckled. He had to agree - he didn't know exactly what that entailed either, and the thought of them both bumbling around trying to figure it out caused him to laugh more.
Jane obviously had the same or similar thoughts because she was already trying to contain the giggles that threatened to engulf her. She failed, and when Madam Pomfrey came to check on her patient, she was surprised to find him laughing openly. She doubted he had done that ever before in his entire life. Sometimes laughter was the best medicine.
******************************************************************
Note:
Ah, my wonderful loyal readers, and my wonderful new readers, this note is at the end because I didn't want to spoil the chapter for you in advance. I hope you all enjoyed this nice short little fluff piece before the drama returns and we spiral towards the end. I am becoming increasingly concerned that you may not like what I have planned in the following chapters, and this compelled me to write an epilogue yesterday, so for those of you that find yourselves becoming agitated at what will be happening, please stick with me.
Besides, there is only 7 chapters to go, so I hope you are all interested enough to continue on this journey. The epilogue may end up being VERY long - a friend I sent it to suggested I slow the pace a little, and it is already 6 pages. Oh, boy! Just be warned that there is a lot of pain coming in the next few chapters for poor Severus and Jane, but I think it makes a more balanced story. Don't forget this is a Drama, not a romance and that means there should be some.
After all, Severus Snape isn't the sweetest person around, nor is Jane, given what has happened to her. Can you really imagine everything being sweetness and light between them until they grow into old age? I admit that originally it was, but that was too one dimensional, so I found a way to force them from their comfort zones, which I think should be within the bounds of acceptability. I admit to you all now that this hasn't ended up where I expected it to. If you want to know my original plans, drop me an email.. It really was very sweet.
The reason I am saying all of this is that I really do want your feedback as the next few chapters are posted. This is the first time I have made such large changes in my original story plan, and I want to know if it works. I also really need to know if you are willing to bear with me as things turn a little darker. I have written 33 chapters of things settling into a nice comfortable place, and am really concerned that you may all be upset by the final 7 chapters. I beg you though, please keep reading.
Thank you for your reviews, particularly those of you who have been kind enough to review more than once. I apologise for not answering you all individually any more, but I don't have the time at the moment. I think this author's note should show how much I care about what you write. Your words are important to me and I don't want to disappoint you.
Ok, I will stop rambling now!
Hey there everyone, the note is at the end this time, read the chapter first and you will understand why.
Thanks for the reviews, please read and enjoy. Review if you wish. I know I do.
Take care.
****************************************************************
Jane returned from Snape's chambers, bathed and dressed, to find Dumbledore sitting beside the Potions Master who was still lying wearily in the hospital bed, not yet fully recovered. "I am sorry Severus, I wasn't aware you had been hurt, let alone of the seriousness of your injuries or I wouldn't have questioned you last evening." The older man apologised, unaware of Jane's quiet return.
"That is quite alright Headmaster. You weren't to know." The Potions Master said wearily.
"No it's not alright." Jane asserted from the door, angry that Snape would let Dumbledore off so lightly.
Both men turned and looked at the girl watching them. "Jane, please don't be rude."
"I'm sorry Severus, but I want him to know it does matter and that it isn't alright. He sends you off without any consideration for your safety, and it isn't good enough."
Dumbledore looked sadly at the girl who just accused him. He felt terrible that his Potions Master had been hurt again, and worse because he was unable to protect the man, particularly given the important role Snape played in his own grand daughter's happiness. "I am afraid Jane is right Severus. It isn't good enough. I think your period of usefulness as a spy has come to an end and the time has come for us to find a way to combat Voldemort's power over you."
Snape looked at the older man, not quite able to understand what he meant. Then, as awareness dawned on him, that Dumbledore meant to free him from the obligation of returning to Voldemort, a small flare of excitement lit in Snape's soul. Could it be that there might be a way to free him from the torment of a foolish mistake made a lifetime ago? Certainly, if anyone could find a way to weaken Voldemort's grip on him, it would be the Headmaster. "Headmaster, are you sure?" He held his breath, waiting for an answer; barely willing to hope it might be true.
"Yes, Severus, I am. I don't wish to see you hurt any more than Jane does. I can't imagine that stopping his friendly reminders will be easy, I know of no one who has successfully broken from their commitment to him yet, and you are perhaps the one who has tried the hardest, but I think it is time that we at least attempted to find something that will go some way to protecting you from harm even if we can't stop him calling altogether."
The joy of release flooded though the Potions Master, his injuries seeming somehow less significant now that he would be freed of the necessity of attending any more of Voldemort's punishment sessions. He no longer had an obligation to the Headmaster to fulfil, now he only had to attend his 'Master' until a solution could be found for the damn mark on his forearm, and that solution couldn't come fast enough for the weary man.
Snape noticed, with some interest and more concern that his hands were still shaking. If the torture continued for much longer, it was quite likely that his future as a Potions Master would also be at risk. Then what would he do?
"Headmaster, are you really sure?" Snape could hardly believe it, he hardly dared to hope that the man's words were true.
Jane, still standing by the door, was just as surprised, but was also still a little sceptical of the Headmaster's motive for promising something he couldn't provide; maybe it was just to transfer the guilt from him back to Severus. Maybe, by freeing the Potions Master from his duties as a spy, without providing a method of overcoming Voldemort's power over the tortured man, he could rationalise allowing him to go when called, without being burdened by the guilt that obviously plagued him as a result of the current arrangements. Particularly when the most recent visits had almost resulted in Severus' death.
"I am Severus. Not that I think finding a solution will be easy." The old wizard stood and rested his hand on Snape's shoulder. "Rest boy. Take the time to properly recover this time. I don't want you damaging yourself further. Your importance in the coming fight may now be reduced, but your importance here, as a teacher and a friend is no less than it was before." Elderly blue eyes glittered, and met dark disbelieving ones. "You are valued here for your skills and talents as a wizard in general, and in potions in particular; not just for the information you provide, and I am sorry if I made you feel that wasn't the case."
Dumbledore moved to the door, and paused beside Jane. "Take care of him Jane, you are the first person he has allowed himself to care for in many years." His words were quiet so that the man in the bed couldn't hear them. "I am glad he has found someone."
"Perhaps you are." Jane answered, not yet trusting the older man.
**********
Snape recovered slowly. His injuries had been serious, and even Madam Pomfrey's healing talents had been unable to affect a rapid recovery. It gave the surly man the opportunity to consider what life free from spying would be like, and he came to the conclusion that it would be strangely pleasant, particularly with Jane being part of it now.
Joy at living wasn't something he had been prepared to entertain before and now that the opportunity arose to do so, he would have to carefully consider his options. There were choices open to him now that he would never have considered viable before. He sighed, and contemplated the girl sitting beside him - she had certainly thrived in the environment. Would it be fair to drag her away again, just when she was growing comfortable with the current arrangement?
"Jane."
"Yes Severus."
"Do you like it here?"
Jane gazed at him trying to understand why he was asking such a strange question. "Of course."
"Really?"
"Yes, why wouldn't I?"
"Because it isn't your world."
"No," Jane agreed. "It's better." She smiled.
Snape wanted to know if Jane was only being enthusiastic because it was his world and she enjoyed being with him. "What if I wasn't here?" He asked quietly.
Jane jumped up, looking stricken. "What's wrong? Are you all right? Is there something you aren't telling me?" Her face was pale.
Snape hadn't considered the alternative possible meanings of his words, but Jane's reaction made him realise he had been a fool. He had been surprised by the girl's overreaction, then he remembered that she had already lost one parent, and what that loss had meant for her life. He mentally kicked himself for not thinking, and tried to calm the girl.
"Jane, stop. There is nothing wrong, and I am not planning on leaving you." He watched as she barely controlled the tears of relief. "No, I was just wondering if you would perhaps prefer to live elsewhere."
He realised he had done it again, spoken without thinking, when Jane pulled away from the bed. "You want to send me back!" She accused.
"No. Jane, I was just thinking that there is no real reason for us to stay here. WE could go and live elsewhere, not right now, but soon, after the final battle." He suggested, wondering if Jane would ever recover from the trauma of her youth. Even after months of care at Hogwarts, she was still jumpy, and prone to overreaction at the first sign of trouble.
"But you work here."
"Jane, my skills are such that I could work anywhere. I was just wanting to know if you would prefer to live a more normal life."
Jane shrugged and sat down, relieved, but still looking slightly tense. "Would you care to explain just what a normal life is?" She glanced up at him, then lowered her eyes and smiled slightly, finally calming again.
At least the tempests left as quickly as they arrived, Snape thought. He smiled in return, and then, as amusement overwhelmed him at the concept of them trying to live a 'normal' life together, he chuckled. He had to agree - he didn't know exactly what that entailed either, and the thought of them both bumbling around trying to figure it out caused him to laugh more.
Jane obviously had the same or similar thoughts because she was already trying to contain the giggles that threatened to engulf her. She failed, and when Madam Pomfrey came to check on her patient, she was surprised to find him laughing openly. She doubted he had done that ever before in his entire life. Sometimes laughter was the best medicine.
******************************************************************
Note:
Ah, my wonderful loyal readers, and my wonderful new readers, this note is at the end because I didn't want to spoil the chapter for you in advance. I hope you all enjoyed this nice short little fluff piece before the drama returns and we spiral towards the end. I am becoming increasingly concerned that you may not like what I have planned in the following chapters, and this compelled me to write an epilogue yesterday, so for those of you that find yourselves becoming agitated at what will be happening, please stick with me.
Besides, there is only 7 chapters to go, so I hope you are all interested enough to continue on this journey. The epilogue may end up being VERY long - a friend I sent it to suggested I slow the pace a little, and it is already 6 pages. Oh, boy! Just be warned that there is a lot of pain coming in the next few chapters for poor Severus and Jane, but I think it makes a more balanced story. Don't forget this is a Drama, not a romance and that means there should be some.
After all, Severus Snape isn't the sweetest person around, nor is Jane, given what has happened to her. Can you really imagine everything being sweetness and light between them until they grow into old age? I admit that originally it was, but that was too one dimensional, so I found a way to force them from their comfort zones, which I think should be within the bounds of acceptability. I admit to you all now that this hasn't ended up where I expected it to. If you want to know my original plans, drop me an email.. It really was very sweet.
The reason I am saying all of this is that I really do want your feedback as the next few chapters are posted. This is the first time I have made such large changes in my original story plan, and I want to know if it works. I also really need to know if you are willing to bear with me as things turn a little darker. I have written 33 chapters of things settling into a nice comfortable place, and am really concerned that you may all be upset by the final 7 chapters. I beg you though, please keep reading.
Thank you for your reviews, particularly those of you who have been kind enough to review more than once. I apologise for not answering you all individually any more, but I don't have the time at the moment. I think this author's note should show how much I care about what you write. Your words are important to me and I don't want to disappoint you.
Ok, I will stop rambling now!