CHAPTER FOUR: POISONED
Faith found herself tiring more and more as the day continued. She'd never felt this tired after a training session before, even after she'd pulled an all-night like she had the evening before. Joanna casually corrected Faith's sloppy moves, acting as the concerned Watcher.
Faith switched to target practise, aiming throwing knives at a large target. Usually she could get all of the knives to hit the bullseye, but today she could barely even hit the board. She frowned and put all of her concentration into the task at hand.
"Jo, something wicked freaky is goin' on here," Faith complained.
Joanna came and stood behind her charge and observed Faith's inaccurate throws. Faith turned to her Watcher, desperate for answers.
"Hmmm…perhaps you're just falling ill," Joanna suggested.
Faith scowled and flopped onto the couch, her arms across her chest, looking the part of a petulant child.
"I'm not sick."
"Maybe you've got other things on your mind," Joanna said. "Certain…blonde people."
Faith threw a cushion at her Watcher, annoyed that she missed even though Joanna was standing only three feet away from her. There was something seriously wrong, and Faith wanted to know what it was.
"Shut. Up."
Joanna sat beside her Slayer, hugging the pillow that Faith had thrown.
"This sucks," Faith complained.
"I'm sure you'll be fine," Joanna assured the girl.
Faith turned to her Watcher, her eyes wide and pleading. "What if I'm not?"
Joanna was surprised to see the raw emotion in Faith's eyes. She'd never seen Faith look panicked before, and it was a new and upsetting experience.
"Maybe you should uh…forego patrolling for a while," Joanna suggested "Take the evening off, stay home and rest."
Faith looked at her with raised eyebrows. In the seven months that Faith had been the Slayer, Faith had never not gone out at night. Even if she didn't go patrolling, she would always go clubbing.
"Or not."
Faith sighed deeply and stood up.
"Maybe that whole sleeping thing's not such a bad idea," she said.
Joanna nodded and watched Faith walk up the stairs, a feeling of guilt settling in her stomach. She took several deep breaths and wandered into the kitchen, making herself a cup of tea to try and settle her nerves. She'd been told by other Watcher's that the Cruciamentum was a trying ordeal for both Watcher and Slayer, but having to administer the test herself seemed so completely different. She could suddenly understand Rupert Giles' reluctance to force the test on his own Slayer.
Joanna had never told Faith about Buffy. She knew that if Faith knew that her own calling had basically been a mistake, Faith would take it fairly badly. Instead, Joanna had reinforced the mythology of there being 'one girl in all the world'.
She sighed and prayed to the Powers That Be that Faith would forgive her when the truth finally came out.
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Faith managed to sleep for a solid seven hours before waking to the smell of dinner. She sat up tiredly and wiped the sleep from her eyes. She walked over to her weapons chest and picked up her favoured sword. It felt unusual in her hand, as though it didn't belong there. It was heavier than she remembered it being, and after several seconds, she found she could no longer hold it steady. She replaced it in the trunk and blinked away her tears. She wouldn't cry dammit.
She took hold of her crossbow and aimed it carefully at the target in her room. She breathed in slowly, trying to calm herself down. She fired and cursed loudly when the bolt embedded itself in the wall, rather than anywhere near the large red target. She sat down, her back to the wall, her knees pulled into her chest.
She wanted to know what was happening to her. The thought of not being the Slayer was terrifying to her. If she wasn't the Slayer, then she was absolutely nothing. She had no friends, no skills other than her vampire fighting abilities, and no real plans for a future. As a Slayer, plans for the future seemed rather pointless. They lived fast and died young. She had accepted that years ago when her Watcher had taken her in.
She'd lived with Joanna since just after she'd turned ten. Faith's father had been an abusive alcoholic, and her mother hadn't been that much better. When Joanna had turned up on the Keller's doorstep seven years ago, Faith's parents hadn't even put up that much of a fight in regards to the custody of the young Potential Slayer. Faith had been devastated at first not wanting to leave her parents, even though she was desperately unhappy with how they treated her. Life with her parents was all she had known.
Whilst Joanna wasn't entirely affectionate towards Faith, she at least wasn't abusive towards her. Faith had grown to enjoy life away from her parents, and now knew that she was far better off living with her Watcher. She didn't visit her parents, but she often lurked outside their house, wincing when she heard the fighting that came from within the house. It seemed that nothing had changed even after Faith had left.
Faith sighed and stood up, wiping at her eyes. She replaced the weapons in the trunk and quietly walked down the stairs and into the kitchen.
"Feeling any better?" Joanna asked.
Faith shrugged and hoisted herself up onto the bench beside where Joanna was cutting vegetables. Joanna gave her a disapproving look which Faith ignored as usual. "Not feelin' any worse."
"Are you sure you should go out tonight?" She didn't want her Slayer to run into a fight and be too weak to defend herself. She knew that that was the entire point of the Cruciamentum, but the test wouldn't come until the following evening.
"It'll be fine," Faith assured her. "I'll just go dancing instead of patrolling."
Joanna nodded, knowing that she couldn't protest too much without giving herself away.
"Before you go, I want you to take another look at some of those meditative crystals," Joanna said.
Faith rolled her eyes, hopped down off the bench, stole a carrot and eventually agreed. "I don't see the point, but yeah sure."
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S&K