Disclaimer: I own RK I swear I do....... OK not really but a girl can dream
cant she By: Jen-chan
Strength
I wake up gasping for air. Another dream, another nightmare, another horror from the past. I can smell it. I can see it. I can tasted it. I can feel it. BLOOD.
I glance up at the clock it 2:30. I've only slept for two hours. This is the first night this week that I've slept at all. I know its showing in my face. She's worried about me I see it in her eyes. I've worried her again.
These nightmares, which I though I could stop are now coming more frequently and vividly then usual. But I don't have the strength to fight these memories anymore. I . . . I don't have the strength to fight him anymore.
HITOKIRI BATTOUSAI. I wish I could do away with him. I wish I could just get rid of this manslayer inside me but no matter how hard I try he always breaks through.
I reach up and pull out the tie holding back my hair. My hair gently showers down my head covering my sad face. My dark red hair seems to be covered in blood. My hair, my hands, my soul all covered in the blood of the countless innocents that died under the blade of my merciless katana. These people I killed for this distorted view of justice. The memories come flowing back to me every battle, every person, every death. The stench of blood seems to have filled the room the taste of blood has filled my mouth. It is crawling on my skin.
I hear the door suddenly creak and know she's behind me. I fell her comforting hand gently land on my shoulder. I don't want her clean hand to touch my bloody body, her innocent defiled by my sin.
My unsticks kick in and I roughly grasp the hand casing this unwanted touch. Almost completely unaware of what im doing my fingers rap tightly around hers tiny wrist and I begin twisting it. She lets out I small yell of pain. I become alert of what Im doing I instantly let go.
She bends down rubbing her bruised wrist and softly whispers my name "Ken. . .shin". The tears I've been hold back for so long are finally released.
"I . . . .I . . Im so sorry I didn't mean to I just . ." She silences me by place her fingers over my lips. My tears splash lightly on to her hand. I try to fight the tear but im so tired of fighting them. I cant fight them any longer. I don't want to fight them any longer.
I rapped my hand around her skinney waist, pulled her close to me and rested my head on her shoulder breathing in a sweet perfume of jasmine . She softly stroked my head as I cried on her shoulder.
I don't know how long we sat in each other arms. As I drifted off to sleep I begin to wonder what Sano and Yahiko would think if they woke up in found the two of us like this, the teasing would never end. My thoughts were interrupted by a word being softly whispered in my ear.. "Daijobu" She stands up and I look up and simply smile at her. She returns the smile and leaves.
I slept again expecting the nightmares to come again but they didn't come. All I thought about was her. How could one word mean so much?! That word gave me strength. Knowing how much this girl, who was so precious, cared about me gave me so much strength. The strength to drive away Battousai and become Kenshin simply Himura Kenshin.
"Karou . . . . Daijobu"
Strength
I wake up gasping for air. Another dream, another nightmare, another horror from the past. I can smell it. I can see it. I can tasted it. I can feel it. BLOOD.
I glance up at the clock it 2:30. I've only slept for two hours. This is the first night this week that I've slept at all. I know its showing in my face. She's worried about me I see it in her eyes. I've worried her again.
These nightmares, which I though I could stop are now coming more frequently and vividly then usual. But I don't have the strength to fight these memories anymore. I . . . I don't have the strength to fight him anymore.
HITOKIRI BATTOUSAI. I wish I could do away with him. I wish I could just get rid of this manslayer inside me but no matter how hard I try he always breaks through.
I reach up and pull out the tie holding back my hair. My hair gently showers down my head covering my sad face. My dark red hair seems to be covered in blood. My hair, my hands, my soul all covered in the blood of the countless innocents that died under the blade of my merciless katana. These people I killed for this distorted view of justice. The memories come flowing back to me every battle, every person, every death. The stench of blood seems to have filled the room the taste of blood has filled my mouth. It is crawling on my skin.
I hear the door suddenly creak and know she's behind me. I fell her comforting hand gently land on my shoulder. I don't want her clean hand to touch my bloody body, her innocent defiled by my sin.
My unsticks kick in and I roughly grasp the hand casing this unwanted touch. Almost completely unaware of what im doing my fingers rap tightly around hers tiny wrist and I begin twisting it. She lets out I small yell of pain. I become alert of what Im doing I instantly let go.
She bends down rubbing her bruised wrist and softly whispers my name "Ken. . .shin". The tears I've been hold back for so long are finally released.
"I . . . .I . . Im so sorry I didn't mean to I just . ." She silences me by place her fingers over my lips. My tears splash lightly on to her hand. I try to fight the tear but im so tired of fighting them. I cant fight them any longer. I don't want to fight them any longer.
I rapped my hand around her skinney waist, pulled her close to me and rested my head on her shoulder breathing in a sweet perfume of jasmine . She softly stroked my head as I cried on her shoulder.
I don't know how long we sat in each other arms. As I drifted off to sleep I begin to wonder what Sano and Yahiko would think if they woke up in found the two of us like this, the teasing would never end. My thoughts were interrupted by a word being softly whispered in my ear.. "Daijobu" She stands up and I look up and simply smile at her. She returns the smile and leaves.
I slept again expecting the nightmares to come again but they didn't come. All I thought about was her. How could one word mean so much?! That word gave me strength. Knowing how much this girl, who was so precious, cared about me gave me so much strength. The strength to drive away Battousai and become Kenshin simply Himura Kenshin.
"Karou . . . . Daijobu"