I woke slowly. I didn't move my head or sit up, just opened my eyes. I raised my hand slowly until I was looking directly at my fingers. I just lay there, reflecting on last night. I had burnt them, until my fingernails blackened. I had cut my arms with a rock I'd sharpened magically.
It had hurt, oh yes, it had hurt beautifully. I smiled slightly, grateful for the reminder that I could still feel something as normal as pain. That spell, the medical one I had read about, worked perfectly, so there wasn't a mark on me. My hands were as smooth as ever, as were my arms.
"What are you smiling about?" Ron asked sleepily from his bed. He's just woken up, and was rubbing his eyes. "It's too early to be cheerful." Ron continued, grumbling.
"I just slept well, that's all." I said. Ron raised his eyebrows.
"Oh? Had a pleasant dream, did you?"
I blushed, making Ron laugh.
"You have a dirty mind, Ron." I told him, throwing off my covers and putting my legs over the side of the bed.
"Yeah Ron. Is that all you think about?" Seamus threw in from his bed.
There was a rustling of covers and the curtains to Dean's bed opened.
"I'm surprised you haven't been sneaking into the girls rooms, since you're always so interested." Dean smirked at Ron's blush.
Colin ws sitting up against his pillows, reading a book. He'd evidently been up for awhile.
"I can vouch for the fact that Harry slept like a rock. I got up after midnight for some water, and he absolutely motionless."
I felt a twinge of worry, just slightly. Did Colin suspect what I'm doing? No, he was just making conversation.
Ron turned on Colin, happy to have a target other than him.
"And what were you doing looking at Harry while he was sleeping? Just how much time did you spend watching him?" Ron teased.
Colin was blushing now worse than anyone, and everyone but me started laughing, throwing pillows towards Colin. The boy shrieked in mock terror and hid behind his book.
I grinned; I couldn't help myself. Humor is contagious, and I'm not immune. Besides, if I allowed myself to grin then maybe no one would notice I haven't truly laughed in quite some time.
"Come on guys, we'd better hurry. We don't want to miss breakfast." I said.
"Or class." Colin added, inspiring another round of pillows thrown at him.
The boys crowded into the showers, joined by gryffindors of various years. Some people were jostling and teasing each other, while others simply stood under the water looking mostly asleep. Very few people were using the separate shower stalls; most students didn't care about showering in groups.
It was a weird quirk of mine that my friends had learned to accept. They seemed to attribute my shyness to growing up with an unpleasant (they didn't know the half of it!) muggle family.
I just accepted greetings from various boys as I walked fully clothed past them, and slipped into a stall on my own.
There was no need to bother my friends by letting them see my scars. They'd only get all worried and pepper me with unanswerable questions.
I met up with Hermione and Ron again in the common room. Almost everyone else had already gone for breakfast.
"Honestly Harry, you spend more time getting ready for a day than most of us girls." Hermione told me as we left the dormitories.
"It just takes me longer to wake up. Not everyone can be as alert as you." I teased.
"Well they should be."
Ron rolled his eyes, but I could see he was grinning.
The great hall was as crowded as ever. Students laughed and talked among themselves, eating leisurely. Since it was breakfast, there was no waiting for the meals, you just told the menu what you wanted and it appeared. It was easier that way.
I sat down beside Seamus: Ron and Hermione were sitting on his other side.
"Morning Harry." Seamus said, taking a bite out of something indescribable.
"Morning, Seamus. What are you eating?" It looked like a pancake that someone else had already eaten at least once.
Dean grinned at me from Seamus' other side.
"He's having a surprise dish."
I stared.
"For breakfast? Are you mad? You don't even know what's in those things!" I said loudly.
"I doubt even the house-elves know what's in those things." Hermione commented.
Colin winked at Dean before saying: "I heard the bits of meat are mice and rats they find from around the school."
Seamus stopped chewing, staring at his friends in horror.
"It makes sense. How else would they keep down the rodent population?" Dean says agreeably.
Seamus shrugged. He'd caught on to the joke by now.
"Ah well." He said dramatically. "Rats can be very nutritious."
Ron was glaring in an amused way at his classmates.
"That's really gross you guys. Some of us are trying to eat real food over here."
"Don't worry, Ron. Rats carry too much disease, Dumbledore wouldn't let us eat them." Hermione was being her usual matter-of-fact self.
"Spoilsport." Colin told her.
I was listening to all this without really hearing it. I looked around the great hall, not really seeing anything. It felt almost like being in a play, where you know your lines so well they become automatic, but you're still detached.
I realized I was staring at my knife absently. I rolled it around in my fingers, thinking about how it would feel to cut just slightly into my own flesh.
I didn't even notice when my friends fell silent; until a familiar voice sounded right behind me.
"Potter,"
* * * * *
I was aware the entire gryffindor table was watching me silently, and I kept my posture severe. Potter was sitting at the table looking lost in thought, twirling a table knife between his fingers. I wondered why the boy was looking at the utensil with such a strange expression.
"Potter." I said again, growing irritated. The boy seemed to finally realize I was there, because he set down the knife and turned his head.
"Professor Snape." It wasn't a question, more of a statement acknowledging my presence.
"I trust you're ready for today's quidditch match. I know Mr. Malfoy has been talking about it for days." I let my lips curl into my usual sneer, all the while watching Potter's reactions closely. I had to know…
"I am, of course. Is that all?" There were gasps from Potter's friends. They couldn't believe he had just dismissed the feared potions master. So. Something really was going on with the boy.
"I should give you detention for that, Mr. Potter. Impertinence like that cannot be allowed." I kept my voice controlled and dangerous. I could see other gryffindors shifting nervously, trying not to stare. Longbottom wasn't even trying to be subtle. He watched the exchange with a horrified expression, his forgotten spoon dripping milk onto his lap.
"Why don't you, then." Potter said. Again it was a statement. He sounded calm; his green eyes were aloof. Now most of the gryffindor table was openly gaping at him, and some of the students from other tables were listening in.
Despite my earlier worry I almost snarled. No student was allowed to speak to me that way, especially not Harry Potter!
"Twenty points from Gryffindor, Potter. I'll see you in the dungeons at six sharp."
I hissed. I whirled around, my black cloak billowing behind me as I stalked out of the great hall.
* * * * *
"Good lord, Harry." Colin says weakly, watching the retreating figure of Professor Snape.
I ignore him.
"That was absolutely priceless!" Fred crows, slapping me on the back. "Did you see the greasy gits face?" George and Lee are grinning wildly. Neville is still staring at me. I shoot him a glare that makes him quickly look away, wiping up his spilt breakfast.
"That was completely irresponsible!" Hermione says. "You're lucky Snape only took twenty points."
I sigh.
"You didn't all expect me to stay scared of that bastard forever, did you?" I ask.
"Of course not." Ron tells me hastily. "Just be sure he doesn't use an unforgivable on you tonight." It is only half teasing, but I look thoughtful.
Crucio. The word rolls around in my mind. Hmm…
"I'm going to class." I say suddenly. I stand up, not waiting for my friends to follow.
"See you there." Ron and Hermione chorus together.
I make my way towards the door, but find myself blocked off.
Draco Malfoy is standing in my way, his two sidekicks Crabbe and Goyle on either side of him, grinning foolishly.
For a moment no one speaks. I stare impassively into the silvery eyes of the pale blonde in front of me, refusing to back down. Nor does Draco look away.
"You think you're brave, Potter?" Draco sneers. "Standing up to Snape? Does it make you feel more important?"
I say nothing, but I begin to get angry.
"Ready to lose at quidditch, Potter? You have a few more hours to wait, you should practice." So insulting, Draco is always insulting.
"Malfoy." I say quietly, dangerously. I keep the anger out of my voice with only minimal effort. Draco is just a stupid, childish boy, hardly worth getting mad at.
Something in my tone makes both Crabbe and Goyle shift nervously, but Draco's eyes flare.
"Aw, is Potter going to do something?" Draco sneers again. It is really quite annoying.
I take a step forward, until I'm just a hand span away from Draco. I don't touch him; don't yell. I lower my voice.
"You are a sad, arrogant, twisted, spoiled little boy, Malfoy. Don't mess with me. I am no longer the goody little gryffindor you used to kick around."
Draco's eyes are wide with disbelief, and both Crabbe and Goyle are backing slowly away.
I take the opportunity to raise my hand to Malfoy's jaw. I run a single finger down his throat, no pressure, just tracing a line down his neck.
"I have no problem giving back all the pain you've ever given me, Draco. All at once."
Draco shows fear for the first time. He's beginning to realize that I've changed, he isn't sure when, but it happened somehow. There is a predatory look in my eyes that reminds Draco of his father; and that frightens him more than he dares show.
Draco backs away, shaking his head. I sweep past him without giving him a second glance.
Draco looks at Crabbe and Goyle, the only other students to hear what I've said.
"Call a meeting after this class." Draco says hoarsely. Crabbe nods, his face for once losing the perpetual look of stupidity. He understands. The slytherin have to meet, to discuss this strange new development.
* * * * *
There it is, everyone. The second chapter. I hope you like it.
Thanks to everyone who reviewed, I love you all! ^-^
The Silver Muse