Title: Atonement
Rating – PG-13/R for this chapter
Chapter – 3/?
Feedback – synth3sis@yahoo.co.uk

Summary: In the last chapter, Otacon and Snake were brutally attacked in Snake's hotel room. Found by Leon, they find themselves in hospital… with many questions.

Otacon felt a gentle touch, a hand squeezing him. He knew he was either safe and warm, or he was dead. Either way, he had the feeling that nothing really mattered, and he drifted back into a deeper state of nothingness.

"Doctor, do you have any idea when he'll wake?" Leon sat at the bedside as a doctor walked in with a clipboard.

"He received a lot of forceful blows to the head. He could be out a long time… Even…" he faltered, not wishing to say the next line when he saw Leon's closed eyes, but knowing he had to be honest, "Even forever. Or he could suffer memory loss or brain damage. We really can't tell yet. Until he wakes up, there's not a lot we can do."

"I see… Thank you," he said, and left to leave, "Well, you have to do your checks, and I need a cup of coffee…" Leon made a hasty exit, needing to ponder upon and digest the information he had just been told.

He'd found them in the hotel room. After not hearing from Otacon, he'd gone to the address he'd been given and found them in a pool of blood on the floor, Otacon's head resting on Snake's chest. He wondered what was between them, and felt a rush of anger to his head as he wondered if he was being betrayed. Now, Otacon was in a coma and couldn't give him the answers he needed. He could be in the coma forever…

"Forever's a long time," he whispered to himself, as he left the ward.

~

Otacon caressed Leon's face. It was the first night they had been together, after confessing their feelings. They had gotten to know each other over a long period of time, and had inevitably fallen in love. It had been frightening and exhilarating, an adventure into the unknown, at least for Otacon, who had never been with a man before. Leon had opened up his deeper secrets, and Otacon felt almost scared of what he had found. Leon had taken away all those inhibitions, one step at a time, and Otacon found himself now at his mercy, wanting more, feeling a new sense of self-understanding that he had been searching for since Shadow Moses. He had indeed felt like a new man when he'd left Snake, and that new man had a lot to learn. He never thought he'd find his truth in a place like New York City, in a dingy club. Life always had surprises for him. Leon was one of them.

They'd met one night, when Otacon had lost his way. Entering the club to ask for directions, he felt a little nervous when he realized it was a gay club. In his curiosity, he'd tripped over a slightly drunk dancer and went spiralling a few feet through the air to land at the feet of Leon, his papers scattering everywhere. He scrambled down to pick them up in a hurry, scared of what people might see in this classified information.

Leon had bent down to help, and picked up the papers. Then, he looked shocked as through he recognized something. He knelt down next to Otacon, and whispered in his ear.

"What do you know about Metal Gear?" he uttered sharply, and Otacon knew he was in trouble.

However, it didn't turn out quite like that. It seemed that Leon had had a connection with Metal Gear, which made Otacon more nervous. Yet it seemed they shared a common curse – being involved in the creation of a weapon of mass destruction seemed to bring the same feelings of guilt and a wish to atone. But it wasn't only sorrow and pain they shared; they had so much in common. They both loved computers and hacking, and Leon had even seen a few anime in his time. Otacon was sure that he'd found the other half of him.

He'd lied to Snake – told him that he'd had to let him in on the secrets of Metal Gear, but he knew if he'd told the truth Snake would only suspect Leon more.

A voice cut through his dreams, and again he let it drift away, not catching hold of it. He was at peace now, and nothing could hurt him…

~

Snake was somehow faring better despite the fact he'd been shot multiple times, his enhanced genetics making him more resilient to injury than any normal human. He amazed doctors with his progress, and was soon grumbling about not having his smokes, which the doctors prohibited him from having in the ward. The shot to his leg stopped him from moving, so he couldn't do an awful lot. He wanted to ask about Otacon, but when he saw his own report he'd been given the name Gary, and he knew whoever had brought them here had had the foresight not to use their real names. He hadn't had any visits, though, and worried about Otacon's state of health, unable to ask the doctors. He wondered if Leon knew where they were, but if he did, why hadn't he been paid a visit?

His question was finally answered when he was well enough to walk. He told the doctors he was going to exercise, and they didn't argue, after he'd spent all that time in bed. They were glad to see a patient that was positive about his rehabilitation.

Snake used this opportunity to wander the wards, but he seemed to have no luck. He was feeling partly relieved, but partly worried. If Otacon wasn't in the hospital, he might have escaped injury, or been killed or taken hostage… Snake hoped it wasn't the latter. It was going to be some time before he was well enough to go on a mission. He doubted he was dead; Otacon had too much valuable information for anyone to just outright kill him.

He only had one ward left to search – and intensive care, he realized, knowing that there was yet another possibility – Otacon was in a life-threatening condition. He rushed as fast as he could on his bad leg to the intensive care unit, hoping to be able to rule out the worst.

~

Leon kept up his vigil, not leaving Otacon's side. He drank coffee, and ignored the protests of doctors and nurses that he should go home and get some rest.

"This is all my fault, Hal…" he whispered, on the 8th day. He'd taken some sleep after being dragged out of the ward by staff and offered a bed in a quite side room. Not normal hospital policy, they had informed him, but they said they didn't want to make him a patient too. After a rest, he had gone back to the coffee and bedside chatter, hoping that he could say something, anything to wake Hal from his coma.

"How could it be your fault? You weren't there…" came a gruff, suspicious voice from outside the curtain. Snake parted the curtain and walked in, anxious to probe Leon about this possible slip, "What the hell's going on! What did you…?"

Just then, he saw the myriad of wires attached to Otacon's comatose form, attaching him to various machines that monitored his heart rate and other vital signs. He closed his eyes and turned away. Otacon didn't deserve this…

"Maybe I should ask you the same, Solid Snake." Leon said, "You've suspected me of something ever since we met. Come out with it, Hal's hardly listening now, is he?"

Snake grunted, "Don't call me that here. I'm "Gary," remember? How come you had the foresight to give us both false names?" He walked to the end of the bed and pulled the clipboard off, looking at the name, "He doesn't look like a Nigel to me. Just who the hell are you, anyway?"

"The ex-engineer of the new Metal Gear. So yeah, you could say me and Hal have quite a bit in common." Leon said bitterly, "There you have it, now continue your interrogation, since I'm obviously guilty of betrayal, right?"

Snake looked at him intensely, "Show me some evidence to prove you aren't, and I'll believe you. I'm not as naïve as "Nigel" here."

"Don't be stupid," Leon said angrily, "There's no evidence I can give, except my word and some documents on the new MG. If you want my help in destroying it, I can give you that. In return, I need your trust!"

"What's to say you didn't use "Nigel" to lure me here?" Snake replied, determined not to back down. He didn't care who this man was, or what he was to Otacon, he could feel it in his bones that he was not completely on their side. He'd always trusted his instincts, and they'd never got it wrong yet. When his instincts failed, he would die, and he wasn't going to turn away from what he felt just to please Otacon. Especially when both their lives were at stake.

"I love him! Is that what you want me to say? Look, I don't know what kind of jealousy thing is going on here, but back off!" Leon gave a glazed, enraged look that told Snake he wasn't afraid to fight the much bigger man, despite the fact he would lose in a heartbeat.

"Woah," Snake said, "You've got that all wrong. Otacon and I just fought together and we went through a lot of shit. Maybe he told you about it, but I'm perfectly straight, thank-you-very-much." Snake was only being half-honest, but he didn't fancy revealing his sexual history to this stranger who was most likely a traitor of some kind.

"Oh, so you're a gay-hater, too? Great, just great. What the hell did Hal even respect in you, anyway?" Leon spat on the floor, "You're nothing but a jumped up "I saved the world so respect my ass" type."

Snake growled with anger. Every muscle in his body ached to lash out at Leon for twisting his words and using them against him, but he restrained himself with effort. This wasn't the place for a fight. They'd said too much as it was, and it was dangerous to speak more.

~

Shouting pulled him from the peaceful depths of his dream, which he fought to stay in. The depths of his memories were so inviting, so beautiful that he wanted to stay in them forever. No more fighting, no more pain… Just peace…

Leon held him close, tenderly running a finger down his naked chest. Their bodies moved together, moaning in heavenly bliss, two bodies as one, two spirits, two souls… They soared above everything, and Otacon felt loved, truly loved, for the first time in his life. The pleasure overloaded every sense, travelled through every synapse, their bodies moving in perfect rhythm… Moans escaped them, but then they changed to shouts, angry shouts…

"Don't be stupid!"

"What's to say you didn't use "Nigel" to lure me here?"

Otacon groaned, as if to wish it all away. He was so tired, why wouldn't they let him sleep…

"I love him…"

"Otacon and I just fought together…"

Snake… Snake was there… and Leon, too! Otacon suddenly felt more aware, more awake… But what was going on, were they fighting? He felt his eyes opening…

~

"Shhh!" said Snake, suddenly.

"What?" Leon said, still irritated at Snake's words. Then he heard a low groan from Otacon, and spun on his heel to see Otacon's eyes beginning to open. He sat back down on the chair and gripped Otacon's hand tightly.

"Hal, Hal, it's me, can you hear me?" Leon said hopefully. He pressed the emergency button to call the doctors, and when he turned around, Snake was gone.

~