Hawkeye stood staring at what lay in front of him, wide eyed, his jaw
dropped. He was just too shocked to do anything or to say anything.
"Hawkeye? Hawkeye?!" Margaret called to him when she saw him standing there, frozen. "Hawkeye what's wrong?" She shouted. Still he didn't move, and she hopped out of the jeep and ran over. "Oh my God," Was her response when she saw what he was staring at.
The jeep was lying upside down, and looked as if part of it had been burned. A man who had obviously been thrown from the driver's seat lay crumpled and unconscious on the ground, his torso half covered by the jeep, crushed underneath it. His face was badly burned, cut and bruised, as was most of his body, but he was still identifiable, especially with the now singed and bloody mustache.
"BJ!" Margaret's voice was barely a whisper as she stared at BJ and her eyes welled up with tears. "Dear God no..." She cried, her voice hardly audible.
"You've got to help me Margaret." He gave her shoulders a quick squeeze as he stood behind her; he grabbed his medical bag, and quickly got to work.
He grabbed BJ's wrist but it was badly crushed and cut. His chest was partially exposed from underneath the jeep so he got his stethoscope, silently begging to hear something. Listening carefully, Hawkeye heard a fait heartbeat and he breathed a small sigh of relief. BJ was alive, but just barely.
"Well?" Margaret asked impatiently.
"He's got a beat. It's irregular, and faint. Also, I heard something, sounds like he's got fluid in his lungs. I haven't gotten a good look at him since the jeep is over him but he may have some internal breathing, he's got some burns and definitely some broken bones, but I need a closer look."
"What he needs is a hospital..."
"Some medication," Hawkeye added.
"An OR." Hawkeye sighed. "You radio Potter and Radar. See what we can do to get him back the fastest. I'll get some of the guys to help lift the jeep."
"Don't you lift the jeep! You can't risk hurting your hands! Get the men to do it."
"But..."
"Don't help them, Pierce. Just tell them what to do." She told him in her Major voice.
He rolled his eyes and ran towards the ambulance of corpsmen get some help.
After much grunting and lifting and pushing, the young men finally got the jeep off of BJ and Hawkeye went back to examining him. After a few minutes Margaret came over.
"So, anything new?" She asked nervously.
"Just as I suspected. Two broken legs, one is crushed pretty badly. His wrist is broken and his other arm might be too. I need to get x-rays to see how badly they all are, but I know we'll need to operate on his left leg. He's got internal bleeding, definitely fluid in the lungs, and he's got multiple lacerations, bruises, and burns all over his body."
"Holy shit..." Margaret breathed. "We've got to get him out of here."
"Did you talk to the Colonel?"
She snapped out of her trance, staring at BJ's limp body and remembered what she had come to tell him. "He radioed Radar, who radioed Captain Stokes, and he's going to land up ahead about a hundred feet ahead, the road's a little wider. Horseshoe is on their way back to the camp, they're closer than we are and Stokes can get BJ back quickest. We'll follow behind them."
No sooner had she said that when Radar's voice came on over the radio. "Duckies! Search party Ducks! This is Mama bear 4077th! Do you read me?" Margaret picked up the walkie-talkie and pressed the button. "Mama bear this is rubber duckies. Over."
"They've got mortar fire up ahead. All the roads are blocked. Stokes can fly back, just not over the roads. You guys have to stay behind till I give you the okay to come back. It's some pretty heavy shelling around some parts, you just have to lay low, you might be spending the night out there. Over."
"Okay Radar. Standing by to wait for your okay to come home. BJ will be on his way in a moment when Stokes lands. Over and out."
"Roger Wilco."
Margaret sighed heavily. "Well, I'll go tell the rest. You get BJ ready."
Stokes landed up ahead and with the help of Hawkeye and some corpsmen, they brought BJ to the chopper while keeping him as steady as possible. Hawkeye shouted above the blades to keep him steady, especially since his best friend was riding in the back. He bent down and hit the side of the chopper, signaling for him to take off as he shielded himself from the wind and dust the whir of the blades caused.
Margaret came up beside him and put a hand on his shoulder as they watched the helicopter take off. She had tears in her eyes, which she choked back for another while. She might let Hawkeye see her cry but she didn't want the enlisted men to see her. "I told the men. They're setting up a camp inside the ambulance for themselves, but there's only so much room in there."
"Don't worry, we'll sleep in the jeep. We've got extra blankets, I'll keep you warm." She looked up at him, her eyes showing fear and love. "But we'll keep it PG-13." He added with a sad smile on his face.
"Good. I don't think I could now, even if I wanted to." Her eyes welled up again, her tears coming closer to falling.
"Neither could I. But, he'll be okay." His voice wasn't confident, and he rubbed her back gently to soothe her as well as convince himself BJ would be okay.
"Come on, it'll start getting dark in an hour, let's get a camp set up." She took his hand and led him to their jeep.
He smiled sadly and followed her, and they began to set up for the night. She was amazed with the efficiency and how well Hawkeye set up the camp. "You're not Army. Where'd you learn all this?"
"Dad. We used to go on fishing trips and hunting trips where we'd camp under the stars. I've been doing this since I was three." They were both glad to have something to talk about besides BJ and the state he was in. Not to be insensitive, but they needed to get their minds onto something else so it didn't drive them crazy.
"I had no idea. Don't be upset, but I always thought you would be a, well- not spoiled, and not a city boy, but-"
"Not the kinda guy who enjoys roughing it?" He offered and she nodded. "Well, you make think that because I hate being in the camp in Korea, not because I don't like camping, but because of our job here."
"Well I can understand that."
"But, I'm a country boy, through and through. Dad's a country doctor, so was his dad. The rest of the family are farmers. I worked on the farms as a kid, helping with the horses and cows, working in the crops."
She smiled. "Sounds like you enjoyed it."
"I did. But I wanted to be a doctor even more. I still enjoy going out for a day and just being out at the farm." He sighed. "I miss it."
"I bet you do. It sounded like a lot of fun. Especially for a little boy. I think every boy wishes to run free in the fields."
"Yup." He grinned like a little boy. "I loved every minute of it. I'd kick off my shoes and run through the fields chasing after my bigger cousins in my blue overalls."
She laughed. "You sound like you were a really cute kid. Did you still have the same cute hair?" "You think I'm cute?" He teased her.
"I'm didn't say that, just, I can picture you as a cute little kid with a straw in your mouth, barefoot with overalls and no shirt, the cuffs rolled up, and with the shaggy black hair you're even cuter."
He grinned. "That was me. Then I got older and bigger, but did the same thing, with the same kind of clothes."
She smiled at the thought of him now with overalls and no shirt on, and she liked the picture she had in her head.
Hawkeye noticed she was silent and had a smile on her face. "You like what you see?" He teased.
Margaret blushed and became flustered for a moment. "What? No, I was, just, uh, I was,"
He laughed. "You like what you see, don't you? Come on, tell me, you like this body of mine, and want to see it with less clothes on."
Her eyes widened and she smacked him in the chest. "You're horrible." She laughed and he grabbed her hands and held them against his chest.
"Yeah, but you like it." He said as he neared her lips and kissed her, quickly, but lovingly.
"You're cute you know?"
"Yeah I know." He grinned.
She smiled and shook her head. "Kiss me."
"Major are you coming on to me?" Hawkeye asked her as she put her arms around his neck. "Cause it's working." He leaned down and took her lips with his own, working over them hungrily. He opened her mouth gently and eased his tongue inside, working it over her own passionately but not desperate.
Finally they broke and she looked up in his eyes. "You're an amazing kisser."
"I try." He said with a smile. "We should, well, go to bed...well, go to jeep."
"Go to jeep?"
"We don't have a bed, we're sleeping in the back of the jeep, you got a better way to put it?"
"I don't know, anything sounds better than 'go to jeep'."
He laughed and helped her into the jeep. He hopped up and sat down, kicking off his boots. He leaned into the side of the jeep and against the back, his feet up on the front seat diagonal from him. Margaret sat down next to him, cuddled into his shoulder. She neared closer to him and he helped pull her up so she was sitting on his lap.
"Do you find it warm?" He asked her.
"Not really."
"Oh. Well do you mind, it is really warm, I'm not doing this to seduce you." She looked at him with a confused expression. "I find I get to sleep easier with my shirt off, but I didn't want you to get worried, thinking I was trying to seduce you."
Margaret smiled, she loved how careful he was, not wanting to scare her off. "I don't mind."
"Good." He pulled it off and threw it on the floor of the jeep.
"I'm just going to take this off..." She pulled her Army button shirt off, leaving her in her t-shirt and she leaned against him, her arms around his neck and head on his chest as she sat in his lap. "This is comfortable."
"Yeah." He gulped. He enjoyed being close to her, but was worried about what might happen.
"I know you said you found it was warm, but do you mind if I pull the blanket over us?"
"Um, not at all. I do like to have something over me when I'm sleeping, just, I don't like wearing a shirt in the warm weather."
"I know what you mean, don't worry. I'm not going to be insulted because you took off your shirt. I know you don't mean anything about it, so don't worry." She smiled and kissed his nose. "Where are the blankets?"
He thought for a moment, she seemed very close to him. "Uh, there's one there on the floor I put there."
"Oh, of course." She hadn't seen it in front of her. She leaned forward and grabbed it, and went to lean back when she felt something against her back. She stopped and her eyes widened and she turned around to face Hawkeye, who had eyes just as wide as hers.
His face turned bright red with embarrassment, the same as when he had been a teenager. He shifted and cleared his throat. She jumped off of him and just looked at him. Although pleased the effect she had on him, Margaret was not ready, and neither was he, mentally. Physically he was, but with Margaret it was more a mental than a physical relationship.
"Um, uh.umm... must be the, uh, the heat, tonight, it's warm out..." He trailed off. Bad excuse, he knew it, but his brain wasn't working at the moment.
"So..." Nervously she looked around, mindlessly scratching her head. Both knew they weren't ready to take their relationship further, especially in the situation.
"Yeah..." He mumbled and looked the other way, trying to forget his pain as well as embarrassment.
"Well..." She couldn't help but be turned on, but she wouldn't let anything happen. She couldn't let anything happen, she just wasn't ready.
"I'll, uh, I'll go check with Radar, see if the road is clear..." Before Margaret could respond he jumped out of the jeep, making sure he had his hand over the front of him in case one of the men walked by as he looked in his bag he had thrown by the campfire the men had made.
"Mama Bear, where are you? This is the Duckies, come in Mama Bear, come in Radar!" He checked his watch and saw that it was one hundred hours, but he didn't care. He needed something to get his mind off of Margaret sitting in the jeep.
"Hawkeye what are you doin up this late? I was asleep you know!" Radar's voice came over, and suddenly realized who he was he was talking to. "Oh, sir I'm so sorry sir! This is momma Bear, what do you need?"
"Is the road clear Radar?"
"No sir, still not safe. There's lots of snipers reported in the area, it's just not safe yet. If you guys get hurt I'll be in big trouble! You'll have to stay for at least the rest of the night. Sorry, Hawk."
"Yeah, it's okay Radar. Gotta go now, over and out."
"Over."
He turned the radio off and looked down. He closed his eyes and tried his best to picture everything he could to gross him out. He thought of Radar naked in the place of Margaret and he was ready to go back to the jeep.
"Hi." He smiled as he climbed back in.
Margaret smiled. "Hey." She looked down, wondering exactly how it went away, and she prayed he didn't do what she thought he might do. But since she didn't think he had any magazines with him, she figured he never. "You ready to go to bed now?"
"I guess so."
"Okay, well goodnight."
"Night." He said and settled down next to her in the position they were in before. "Wait." She looked up at him. "I never gave you a goodnight kiss. Goodnight Margaret." He bent down and gave her a short but sweet, loving kiss.
"Goodnight Hawkeye." She leaned up and kissed him, pushing against him she grabbed his head and pulled it closer to her. She was not ready to have sex yet, especially with everything on her mind with BJ, but she needed something from Hawkeye. Finally they let go and she gave him a short sweet kiss again.
"Goodnight." She mumbled, leaned against his chest, and closed her eyes.
It was sometime later when the rumbling of thunder in the distance woke Margaret with a start. It took a moment before she realized where she was. Hawkeye was still sound asleep, leaning against the back of the seat, his legs stretched over into the front seat. The thunder got louder as it neared and she wrapped her arms around his body, huddling next to him as close as she could get, which was when he woke up.
"Hey, what's the matter Margaret?"
She was now trembling and she buried her face into his chest and squeezed him as a loud clap sent her into a state of nervousness.
"Shh, shh it's okay, baby." He pulled her up so she could lean on his shoulder better and he could hold her closer. He wrapped his arms around her waist and held her as he rubbed her back and kissed her hair. "It's not gonna hurt you, I'll make sure of that."
"But, but-"
"I know it's loud but it won't hurt. You know that just as much as I do. Besides, I'll protect you." He held her closer and pulled her back onto his lap, holding her sideways as she put her hands around his neck, cuddling into the crook between his neck and shoulder.
"I feel like a child. This is so immature and such an irrational fear."
"It's okay, I have an irrational fear of small spaces. Even remotely small. Or if I'm closed in somewhere."
"Am I too close?" She asked cautiously.
He smiled down at her. "No, you can't get to close baby." He leaned down and kissed her slow and softy, until a clap of thunder directly overhead caused Margaret to shiver and suddenly there was a downpour of rain. "Ah, shit!" Hawkeye mumbled. The rain was coming down hard and fast, and didn't show signs of being a small shower. He knew it would last. "Be back in a sec." He jumped out and got his bag, pulling out his army camouflaged poncho raincoat. He opened it up and spread it over their heads, so they were completely inside.
"Hawkeye, is it too dark, or small or anything?"
"No, for some reason, blankets over my head never bothered me. I always used to make tents as a kid out of sheets and stuff, I loved it. Besides, it really doesn't bother me when there's light." With that he clicked on his flashlight. "We can tell ghost stories and hold up the light like this." He held the light up to his face and pretended to laugh evilly.
Margaret laughed. "Give me that." She went to grab it and he pulled back so she fell on him. They started to giggle before they realized they were laughing loudly underneath a raincoat with enlisted men around them.
Hawkeye grabbed her and kissed her before holding her close. "We should go to sleep now."
"Yeah."
They were silent for a few moments in which Hawkeye finally got to think. With all that had been happening with Margaret and now with BJ, he never got to reflect, and it suddenly hit him that BJ was seriously injured.
He sighed. "I wonder how BJ is. I guess Potter and Charles are taking care of him. God it's all my fault! I was supposed to go up to the front this time! Stokes said he could tell it was a landmine on the road that exploded. Unfortunately he's seen a lot of those. And if I had gone BJ would be perfectly fine now!" He continued rambling about it when Margaret put a finger to his lips.
"Hawkeye, it's not your fault. You have to understand that. You were ordered to stay and operate on that kid with the chest wound. It's your specialty. Being the chief surgeon here and the best damn doctor I've ever seen, I know you were that kid's best chance of survival."
"But what if...what if because of that...BJ's..." His voice broke. "BJ's chance of survival..." He trailed off.
"Oh, Hawk..." She hugged him closer to her. "Listen, you may be the best damn doctor, but Charles and Potter are close seconds. They will pull him through. BJ will be fine."
Hawkeye looked at her straight into her blue eyes with his clouded blue eyes, which were normally so bright. "You don't know that."
Margaret sighed and looked straight back at him. "No, I don't know that for sure, but I know the Colonel's and Charles' abilities, and I am aware of BJ's injuries. And he WILL pull through. And so will we."
His eyes watered. "If anything happens, it is my fault. He's my best friend." He choked out.
"Hawkeye, come here." She leaned forward and cuddled into him. "Get some sleep baby, and hopefully by morning we can go home, and we'll see BJ. I'm sure they'll let him be your patient, even if you didn't take care of him when he arrived there."
"Yeah. Will you be my nurse?" She looked at him. "I mean BJ's nurse, well you help me with BJ."
"I'd be honoured."
"Good."
"You okay now?"
"Well, hopefully."
"Good. Not to sound mean to BJ, but we can't dwell on it, we must talk about other things too. For example, if you really want me to, I can be your nurse too."
He raised an eyebrow and looked at her. "Just what did you have in mind?"
"Maybe when we can get back, I can give you a physical. But for now, I'll just give you a quick check up." She leaned forward and kissed him, her tongue opening his mouth, exploring his, and wrestling with his own tongue. They both breathed in the scent of each other, breathing heavily and moaning, they rubbed each other's backs, and stroked the other's hair as they got closer and closer.
"Wait." Hawkeye stopped them.
"I know."
"We can't."
"I know, I'm not ready either."
He smiled at her. "Good. You comfy?" He was now stretched out on the seat, lying down against the door with his legs hanging out the side, with Margaret lying on top of him.
"Very. Are you?"
"I always am with a beautiful blonde on top of me."
She smacked him playfully. "Shut up," and kissed him.
He was quiet for a moment and he sighed. "God, I really wish I had a magazine with me."
"What?"
"Well, we were, uh, well, playing..." He trailed off.
She smacked his chest again. "You're disgusting!" "I know." He smiled cheekily.
Margaret rolled her eyes, smiled and kissed him softly and quickly. "Goodnight, again."
"Goodnight baby." He kissed her quickly and soon they were asleep with Margaret lying on top of Hawkeye, completely underneath his rain jacket.
*!*!*!*!*!*
Hawkeye woke up to find Margaret snuggled into him, her head resting on his chest. He smiled for a moment, at the sight of the blonde beauty sleeping on him. He tried to move his arm and realized he was very stiff. That's when he remembered, he had spent the night sitting up in the back seat of a jeep. He thought for a moment, shook his head, and the thoughts of seeing BJ unconscious under the jeep came back to him. It was then he heard the radio.
"Rubber duckies this is Momma bear! Come in ducks!" Radar called. He searched for the walkie talkie as easily as he could without waking up Margaret and found it on the floor. She woke up when he started to talk, but kept silent so she could hear everything.
"This is the ducks, Momma bear. Hawkeye here, was going on Radar?"
"Sir, the shelling's stopped now and the MPs have given you the okay to come on home."
"How's BJ?"
Radar was silent for a moment. "Uh, sir, Colonel Potter said he's gonna talk to you when you get back."
"Oh my God, Radar, is he okay?" Static blared from the radio. "Radar? RADAR!!!" He shouted into the radio. "RADAR! Come on Momma bear! Come on!!! How's BJ??"
"Hawkeye?" He jumped when he heard Margaret. "We gotta get home. BJ will be fine." "How do you know that?"
"I don't. But we have to get home."
"Right. I'll get the enlisted up."
"I'll go. I get results. They're all scared of me." Margaret said with a sad smile as she jumped down and started yelling to the troops.
With Margaret's yelling they sprang into action and in no time the caravan was making it's way down the road, Hawkeye and Margaret's jeep in front.
"Hawk, would you slow down?!" Margaret said as they flew over a large pothole, causing her to cling onto him to stay in the jeep. "You're gonna get us killed!"
"I got to get home to Beej," Was all he said and he pressed the gas harder to the floor.
In record time, they could see the camp ahead and before the jeep stopped completely Hawkeye jumped out and ran into Potter's office.
"Colonel! How's Beej?" He asked as he ran in, only to see the office empty. Radar followed him in. "Sir? They're in surgery now."
"Oh, God. But wouldn't they have done that yesterday?"
The small corporal shook his head sadly. "No sir. They had to stabilize him first before it was safe."
"Oh my God. I gotta go scrub."
"Well, Hawk.... Colonel Potter told me not to let you go in there."
"WHAT?! Why the fuck not?!" He wasn't mad at Radar, but the comment hurt him deeply. "He's my BEST friend!! Doesn't that mean ANYTHING?"
"Sir, I'm just telling you what he said. I can go talk to him, but he asked me not to let you in the OR." "That's BULLSHIT!" He cried.
Margaret ran into the office. "What's going on? Pierce, I heard you yelling, what's the matter?"
"That Bastard won't let me into see my friend!"
"Pierce! Corporal is this true?"
"Ma'am Colonel Potter told me to not let him in the OR."
"Pierce, he's only acting on his orders! Don't get mad at him. Radar, can I go talk to the Colonel?"
"He told me you could, but he'd rather I talked to him so, uh, well," He looked at Hawkeye who was seething. He whispered, "He wants you to watch Captain Pierce."
"WHAT? I don't need a damn babysitter! I deserve to see my friend!!"
"Hawkeye, please, just sit down." She sat him on Radar's bunk. "Corporal, could you talk to Colonel Potter?"
"Yes ma'am." He tied on a surgical mask and went through to the OR.
"Hawkeye, please calm down. Now, Radar is just following orders."
"But why the hell can't I go and see Beej?"
"Hawkeye-"
"Look, I am the best damn surgeon in this camp! I'm chief surgeon!"
"Hawkeye, there are patients in the next room, please!" He started yelling and she kissed him quickly. He stopped for a moment and looked at her. "Look at me Hawkeye. I know you are the best surgeon here. Better than Potter and a hell of a lot better than Charles. But, look at the circumstances. He is your best friend. The colonel is just looking out for you... in case something happens, Hawkeye, you know, we don't want-"
"You're afraid it will be like Tommy, aren't you? He was my best friend. But I got over that. And BJ wouldn't die, he can't die!"
"Hawkeye, let's go into my tent and just... wait it out."
"I can't." He stood up and started to pace.
"Sirs Ma'am?" Radar came back into his office with them. "I spoke to Colonel Potter, he said it's too early to tell anything about BJ-er-Captain Hunnicutt's condition. But he wants you two to go get some rest. And we'll come get you as soon as we know anything."
Hawkeye opened his mouth to retaliate and Margaret cut him off. "Thank you Corporal, that will be fine." She stood up in her Major-ly stance and took Hawkeye's hand. "Come along Pierce."
The pair went into the head nurse's tent and the second the door closed behind him Margaret burst into tears, wrapping her arms around Hawkeye's neck and burying her face in his chest. He held back the tears and wrapped his arms around her waist. Soon he couldn't hold it in any longer and the tears poured out of his eyes as he put his face in her hair. Slowly, he guided them over so they were sitting on the cot. He gathered her in his arms and sat against the corner between the wall and her dresser, holding her in his lap.
He rubbed her back. "We'll get through this." He whispered.
"I'm so scared, Hawkeye."
"So am I, Margaret. But we'll get through this together. I love you."
"I love you too." She said against his chest. "But, I love BJ too. Not in the same way, but I love him! You two are my best friends, Hawkeye!"
"I know, I know. I've had best friends that I grew up with, but people I've known for all 27 years of my life I'm not as close to as BJ. We've known each other for almost two years and it feels like forever."
She sniffed. "I know. But..."
"He'll get through this." He finished.
She looked up at him. "He will." He kissed her slowly, but didn't hold on. It wasn't the right time or place, and neither was in the mood.
They spent the next few hours together, holding each other on the cot, talking about BJ and their past with him, the good and the bad. About Erin and Peg, but it made them sad to think about them, and what could happen to them if, well, they couldn't say it. If something ever *happened* to BJ. They laughed a few times but mostly cried together, and held each other as tight as they could. After four hours, the tent now dark as the sun had started to set, a knock came on the door.
"What is it?"
"It's Radar, ma'am. Where's Captain Pierce?"
"He's in here, Corporal. What do you need?"
"The Colonel wishes to speak to the two of you."
Hawkeye and Margaret exchanged looks of fear, and reassuringly, he squeezed her hand as he stood up. "Come on." He led her out of the tent and towards the doors to the scrub room, where Charles and Colonel Potter were coming out of, walking very slowly, with somber faces.
"Colonel Potter, what's-how's-umm-what-?" Hawkeye didn't know what to ask.
Potter slowly pulled off his surgical gloves and looked at the couple, holding onto the other's arm, not daring to let go.
"Well-" The older doctor stated.
"Hawkeye? Hawkeye?!" Margaret called to him when she saw him standing there, frozen. "Hawkeye what's wrong?" She shouted. Still he didn't move, and she hopped out of the jeep and ran over. "Oh my God," Was her response when she saw what he was staring at.
The jeep was lying upside down, and looked as if part of it had been burned. A man who had obviously been thrown from the driver's seat lay crumpled and unconscious on the ground, his torso half covered by the jeep, crushed underneath it. His face was badly burned, cut and bruised, as was most of his body, but he was still identifiable, especially with the now singed and bloody mustache.
"BJ!" Margaret's voice was barely a whisper as she stared at BJ and her eyes welled up with tears. "Dear God no..." She cried, her voice hardly audible.
"You've got to help me Margaret." He gave her shoulders a quick squeeze as he stood behind her; he grabbed his medical bag, and quickly got to work.
He grabbed BJ's wrist but it was badly crushed and cut. His chest was partially exposed from underneath the jeep so he got his stethoscope, silently begging to hear something. Listening carefully, Hawkeye heard a fait heartbeat and he breathed a small sigh of relief. BJ was alive, but just barely.
"Well?" Margaret asked impatiently.
"He's got a beat. It's irregular, and faint. Also, I heard something, sounds like he's got fluid in his lungs. I haven't gotten a good look at him since the jeep is over him but he may have some internal breathing, he's got some burns and definitely some broken bones, but I need a closer look."
"What he needs is a hospital..."
"Some medication," Hawkeye added.
"An OR." Hawkeye sighed. "You radio Potter and Radar. See what we can do to get him back the fastest. I'll get some of the guys to help lift the jeep."
"Don't you lift the jeep! You can't risk hurting your hands! Get the men to do it."
"But..."
"Don't help them, Pierce. Just tell them what to do." She told him in her Major voice.
He rolled his eyes and ran towards the ambulance of corpsmen get some help.
After much grunting and lifting and pushing, the young men finally got the jeep off of BJ and Hawkeye went back to examining him. After a few minutes Margaret came over.
"So, anything new?" She asked nervously.
"Just as I suspected. Two broken legs, one is crushed pretty badly. His wrist is broken and his other arm might be too. I need to get x-rays to see how badly they all are, but I know we'll need to operate on his left leg. He's got internal bleeding, definitely fluid in the lungs, and he's got multiple lacerations, bruises, and burns all over his body."
"Holy shit..." Margaret breathed. "We've got to get him out of here."
"Did you talk to the Colonel?"
She snapped out of her trance, staring at BJ's limp body and remembered what she had come to tell him. "He radioed Radar, who radioed Captain Stokes, and he's going to land up ahead about a hundred feet ahead, the road's a little wider. Horseshoe is on their way back to the camp, they're closer than we are and Stokes can get BJ back quickest. We'll follow behind them."
No sooner had she said that when Radar's voice came on over the radio. "Duckies! Search party Ducks! This is Mama bear 4077th! Do you read me?" Margaret picked up the walkie-talkie and pressed the button. "Mama bear this is rubber duckies. Over."
"They've got mortar fire up ahead. All the roads are blocked. Stokes can fly back, just not over the roads. You guys have to stay behind till I give you the okay to come back. It's some pretty heavy shelling around some parts, you just have to lay low, you might be spending the night out there. Over."
"Okay Radar. Standing by to wait for your okay to come home. BJ will be on his way in a moment when Stokes lands. Over and out."
"Roger Wilco."
Margaret sighed heavily. "Well, I'll go tell the rest. You get BJ ready."
Stokes landed up ahead and with the help of Hawkeye and some corpsmen, they brought BJ to the chopper while keeping him as steady as possible. Hawkeye shouted above the blades to keep him steady, especially since his best friend was riding in the back. He bent down and hit the side of the chopper, signaling for him to take off as he shielded himself from the wind and dust the whir of the blades caused.
Margaret came up beside him and put a hand on his shoulder as they watched the helicopter take off. She had tears in her eyes, which she choked back for another while. She might let Hawkeye see her cry but she didn't want the enlisted men to see her. "I told the men. They're setting up a camp inside the ambulance for themselves, but there's only so much room in there."
"Don't worry, we'll sleep in the jeep. We've got extra blankets, I'll keep you warm." She looked up at him, her eyes showing fear and love. "But we'll keep it PG-13." He added with a sad smile on his face.
"Good. I don't think I could now, even if I wanted to." Her eyes welled up again, her tears coming closer to falling.
"Neither could I. But, he'll be okay." His voice wasn't confident, and he rubbed her back gently to soothe her as well as convince himself BJ would be okay.
"Come on, it'll start getting dark in an hour, let's get a camp set up." She took his hand and led him to their jeep.
He smiled sadly and followed her, and they began to set up for the night. She was amazed with the efficiency and how well Hawkeye set up the camp. "You're not Army. Where'd you learn all this?"
"Dad. We used to go on fishing trips and hunting trips where we'd camp under the stars. I've been doing this since I was three." They were both glad to have something to talk about besides BJ and the state he was in. Not to be insensitive, but they needed to get their minds onto something else so it didn't drive them crazy.
"I had no idea. Don't be upset, but I always thought you would be a, well- not spoiled, and not a city boy, but-"
"Not the kinda guy who enjoys roughing it?" He offered and she nodded. "Well, you make think that because I hate being in the camp in Korea, not because I don't like camping, but because of our job here."
"Well I can understand that."
"But, I'm a country boy, through and through. Dad's a country doctor, so was his dad. The rest of the family are farmers. I worked on the farms as a kid, helping with the horses and cows, working in the crops."
She smiled. "Sounds like you enjoyed it."
"I did. But I wanted to be a doctor even more. I still enjoy going out for a day and just being out at the farm." He sighed. "I miss it."
"I bet you do. It sounded like a lot of fun. Especially for a little boy. I think every boy wishes to run free in the fields."
"Yup." He grinned like a little boy. "I loved every minute of it. I'd kick off my shoes and run through the fields chasing after my bigger cousins in my blue overalls."
She laughed. "You sound like you were a really cute kid. Did you still have the same cute hair?" "You think I'm cute?" He teased her.
"I'm didn't say that, just, I can picture you as a cute little kid with a straw in your mouth, barefoot with overalls and no shirt, the cuffs rolled up, and with the shaggy black hair you're even cuter."
He grinned. "That was me. Then I got older and bigger, but did the same thing, with the same kind of clothes."
She smiled at the thought of him now with overalls and no shirt on, and she liked the picture she had in her head.
Hawkeye noticed she was silent and had a smile on her face. "You like what you see?" He teased.
Margaret blushed and became flustered for a moment. "What? No, I was, just, uh, I was,"
He laughed. "You like what you see, don't you? Come on, tell me, you like this body of mine, and want to see it with less clothes on."
Her eyes widened and she smacked him in the chest. "You're horrible." She laughed and he grabbed her hands and held them against his chest.
"Yeah, but you like it." He said as he neared her lips and kissed her, quickly, but lovingly.
"You're cute you know?"
"Yeah I know." He grinned.
She smiled and shook her head. "Kiss me."
"Major are you coming on to me?" Hawkeye asked her as she put her arms around his neck. "Cause it's working." He leaned down and took her lips with his own, working over them hungrily. He opened her mouth gently and eased his tongue inside, working it over her own passionately but not desperate.
Finally they broke and she looked up in his eyes. "You're an amazing kisser."
"I try." He said with a smile. "We should, well, go to bed...well, go to jeep."
"Go to jeep?"
"We don't have a bed, we're sleeping in the back of the jeep, you got a better way to put it?"
"I don't know, anything sounds better than 'go to jeep'."
He laughed and helped her into the jeep. He hopped up and sat down, kicking off his boots. He leaned into the side of the jeep and against the back, his feet up on the front seat diagonal from him. Margaret sat down next to him, cuddled into his shoulder. She neared closer to him and he helped pull her up so she was sitting on his lap.
"Do you find it warm?" He asked her.
"Not really."
"Oh. Well do you mind, it is really warm, I'm not doing this to seduce you." She looked at him with a confused expression. "I find I get to sleep easier with my shirt off, but I didn't want you to get worried, thinking I was trying to seduce you."
Margaret smiled, she loved how careful he was, not wanting to scare her off. "I don't mind."
"Good." He pulled it off and threw it on the floor of the jeep.
"I'm just going to take this off..." She pulled her Army button shirt off, leaving her in her t-shirt and she leaned against him, her arms around his neck and head on his chest as she sat in his lap. "This is comfortable."
"Yeah." He gulped. He enjoyed being close to her, but was worried about what might happen.
"I know you said you found it was warm, but do you mind if I pull the blanket over us?"
"Um, not at all. I do like to have something over me when I'm sleeping, just, I don't like wearing a shirt in the warm weather."
"I know what you mean, don't worry. I'm not going to be insulted because you took off your shirt. I know you don't mean anything about it, so don't worry." She smiled and kissed his nose. "Where are the blankets?"
He thought for a moment, she seemed very close to him. "Uh, there's one there on the floor I put there."
"Oh, of course." She hadn't seen it in front of her. She leaned forward and grabbed it, and went to lean back when she felt something against her back. She stopped and her eyes widened and she turned around to face Hawkeye, who had eyes just as wide as hers.
His face turned bright red with embarrassment, the same as when he had been a teenager. He shifted and cleared his throat. She jumped off of him and just looked at him. Although pleased the effect she had on him, Margaret was not ready, and neither was he, mentally. Physically he was, but with Margaret it was more a mental than a physical relationship.
"Um, uh.umm... must be the, uh, the heat, tonight, it's warm out..." He trailed off. Bad excuse, he knew it, but his brain wasn't working at the moment.
"So..." Nervously she looked around, mindlessly scratching her head. Both knew they weren't ready to take their relationship further, especially in the situation.
"Yeah..." He mumbled and looked the other way, trying to forget his pain as well as embarrassment.
"Well..." She couldn't help but be turned on, but she wouldn't let anything happen. She couldn't let anything happen, she just wasn't ready.
"I'll, uh, I'll go check with Radar, see if the road is clear..." Before Margaret could respond he jumped out of the jeep, making sure he had his hand over the front of him in case one of the men walked by as he looked in his bag he had thrown by the campfire the men had made.
"Mama Bear, where are you? This is the Duckies, come in Mama Bear, come in Radar!" He checked his watch and saw that it was one hundred hours, but he didn't care. He needed something to get his mind off of Margaret sitting in the jeep.
"Hawkeye what are you doin up this late? I was asleep you know!" Radar's voice came over, and suddenly realized who he was he was talking to. "Oh, sir I'm so sorry sir! This is momma Bear, what do you need?"
"Is the road clear Radar?"
"No sir, still not safe. There's lots of snipers reported in the area, it's just not safe yet. If you guys get hurt I'll be in big trouble! You'll have to stay for at least the rest of the night. Sorry, Hawk."
"Yeah, it's okay Radar. Gotta go now, over and out."
"Over."
He turned the radio off and looked down. He closed his eyes and tried his best to picture everything he could to gross him out. He thought of Radar naked in the place of Margaret and he was ready to go back to the jeep.
"Hi." He smiled as he climbed back in.
Margaret smiled. "Hey." She looked down, wondering exactly how it went away, and she prayed he didn't do what she thought he might do. But since she didn't think he had any magazines with him, she figured he never. "You ready to go to bed now?"
"I guess so."
"Okay, well goodnight."
"Night." He said and settled down next to her in the position they were in before. "Wait." She looked up at him. "I never gave you a goodnight kiss. Goodnight Margaret." He bent down and gave her a short but sweet, loving kiss.
"Goodnight Hawkeye." She leaned up and kissed him, pushing against him she grabbed his head and pulled it closer to her. She was not ready to have sex yet, especially with everything on her mind with BJ, but she needed something from Hawkeye. Finally they let go and she gave him a short sweet kiss again.
"Goodnight." She mumbled, leaned against his chest, and closed her eyes.
It was sometime later when the rumbling of thunder in the distance woke Margaret with a start. It took a moment before she realized where she was. Hawkeye was still sound asleep, leaning against the back of the seat, his legs stretched over into the front seat. The thunder got louder as it neared and she wrapped her arms around his body, huddling next to him as close as she could get, which was when he woke up.
"Hey, what's the matter Margaret?"
She was now trembling and she buried her face into his chest and squeezed him as a loud clap sent her into a state of nervousness.
"Shh, shh it's okay, baby." He pulled her up so she could lean on his shoulder better and he could hold her closer. He wrapped his arms around her waist and held her as he rubbed her back and kissed her hair. "It's not gonna hurt you, I'll make sure of that."
"But, but-"
"I know it's loud but it won't hurt. You know that just as much as I do. Besides, I'll protect you." He held her closer and pulled her back onto his lap, holding her sideways as she put her hands around his neck, cuddling into the crook between his neck and shoulder.
"I feel like a child. This is so immature and such an irrational fear."
"It's okay, I have an irrational fear of small spaces. Even remotely small. Or if I'm closed in somewhere."
"Am I too close?" She asked cautiously.
He smiled down at her. "No, you can't get to close baby." He leaned down and kissed her slow and softy, until a clap of thunder directly overhead caused Margaret to shiver and suddenly there was a downpour of rain. "Ah, shit!" Hawkeye mumbled. The rain was coming down hard and fast, and didn't show signs of being a small shower. He knew it would last. "Be back in a sec." He jumped out and got his bag, pulling out his army camouflaged poncho raincoat. He opened it up and spread it over their heads, so they were completely inside.
"Hawkeye, is it too dark, or small or anything?"
"No, for some reason, blankets over my head never bothered me. I always used to make tents as a kid out of sheets and stuff, I loved it. Besides, it really doesn't bother me when there's light." With that he clicked on his flashlight. "We can tell ghost stories and hold up the light like this." He held the light up to his face and pretended to laugh evilly.
Margaret laughed. "Give me that." She went to grab it and he pulled back so she fell on him. They started to giggle before they realized they were laughing loudly underneath a raincoat with enlisted men around them.
Hawkeye grabbed her and kissed her before holding her close. "We should go to sleep now."
"Yeah."
They were silent for a few moments in which Hawkeye finally got to think. With all that had been happening with Margaret and now with BJ, he never got to reflect, and it suddenly hit him that BJ was seriously injured.
He sighed. "I wonder how BJ is. I guess Potter and Charles are taking care of him. God it's all my fault! I was supposed to go up to the front this time! Stokes said he could tell it was a landmine on the road that exploded. Unfortunately he's seen a lot of those. And if I had gone BJ would be perfectly fine now!" He continued rambling about it when Margaret put a finger to his lips.
"Hawkeye, it's not your fault. You have to understand that. You were ordered to stay and operate on that kid with the chest wound. It's your specialty. Being the chief surgeon here and the best damn doctor I've ever seen, I know you were that kid's best chance of survival."
"But what if...what if because of that...BJ's..." His voice broke. "BJ's chance of survival..." He trailed off.
"Oh, Hawk..." She hugged him closer to her. "Listen, you may be the best damn doctor, but Charles and Potter are close seconds. They will pull him through. BJ will be fine."
Hawkeye looked at her straight into her blue eyes with his clouded blue eyes, which were normally so bright. "You don't know that."
Margaret sighed and looked straight back at him. "No, I don't know that for sure, but I know the Colonel's and Charles' abilities, and I am aware of BJ's injuries. And he WILL pull through. And so will we."
His eyes watered. "If anything happens, it is my fault. He's my best friend." He choked out.
"Hawkeye, come here." She leaned forward and cuddled into him. "Get some sleep baby, and hopefully by morning we can go home, and we'll see BJ. I'm sure they'll let him be your patient, even if you didn't take care of him when he arrived there."
"Yeah. Will you be my nurse?" She looked at him. "I mean BJ's nurse, well you help me with BJ."
"I'd be honoured."
"Good."
"You okay now?"
"Well, hopefully."
"Good. Not to sound mean to BJ, but we can't dwell on it, we must talk about other things too. For example, if you really want me to, I can be your nurse too."
He raised an eyebrow and looked at her. "Just what did you have in mind?"
"Maybe when we can get back, I can give you a physical. But for now, I'll just give you a quick check up." She leaned forward and kissed him, her tongue opening his mouth, exploring his, and wrestling with his own tongue. They both breathed in the scent of each other, breathing heavily and moaning, they rubbed each other's backs, and stroked the other's hair as they got closer and closer.
"Wait." Hawkeye stopped them.
"I know."
"We can't."
"I know, I'm not ready either."
He smiled at her. "Good. You comfy?" He was now stretched out on the seat, lying down against the door with his legs hanging out the side, with Margaret lying on top of him.
"Very. Are you?"
"I always am with a beautiful blonde on top of me."
She smacked him playfully. "Shut up," and kissed him.
He was quiet for a moment and he sighed. "God, I really wish I had a magazine with me."
"What?"
"Well, we were, uh, well, playing..." He trailed off.
She smacked his chest again. "You're disgusting!" "I know." He smiled cheekily.
Margaret rolled her eyes, smiled and kissed him softly and quickly. "Goodnight, again."
"Goodnight baby." He kissed her quickly and soon they were asleep with Margaret lying on top of Hawkeye, completely underneath his rain jacket.
*!*!*!*!*!*
Hawkeye woke up to find Margaret snuggled into him, her head resting on his chest. He smiled for a moment, at the sight of the blonde beauty sleeping on him. He tried to move his arm and realized he was very stiff. That's when he remembered, he had spent the night sitting up in the back seat of a jeep. He thought for a moment, shook his head, and the thoughts of seeing BJ unconscious under the jeep came back to him. It was then he heard the radio.
"Rubber duckies this is Momma bear! Come in ducks!" Radar called. He searched for the walkie talkie as easily as he could without waking up Margaret and found it on the floor. She woke up when he started to talk, but kept silent so she could hear everything.
"This is the ducks, Momma bear. Hawkeye here, was going on Radar?"
"Sir, the shelling's stopped now and the MPs have given you the okay to come on home."
"How's BJ?"
Radar was silent for a moment. "Uh, sir, Colonel Potter said he's gonna talk to you when you get back."
"Oh my God, Radar, is he okay?" Static blared from the radio. "Radar? RADAR!!!" He shouted into the radio. "RADAR! Come on Momma bear! Come on!!! How's BJ??"
"Hawkeye?" He jumped when he heard Margaret. "We gotta get home. BJ will be fine." "How do you know that?"
"I don't. But we have to get home."
"Right. I'll get the enlisted up."
"I'll go. I get results. They're all scared of me." Margaret said with a sad smile as she jumped down and started yelling to the troops.
With Margaret's yelling they sprang into action and in no time the caravan was making it's way down the road, Hawkeye and Margaret's jeep in front.
"Hawk, would you slow down?!" Margaret said as they flew over a large pothole, causing her to cling onto him to stay in the jeep. "You're gonna get us killed!"
"I got to get home to Beej," Was all he said and he pressed the gas harder to the floor.
In record time, they could see the camp ahead and before the jeep stopped completely Hawkeye jumped out and ran into Potter's office.
"Colonel! How's Beej?" He asked as he ran in, only to see the office empty. Radar followed him in. "Sir? They're in surgery now."
"Oh, God. But wouldn't they have done that yesterday?"
The small corporal shook his head sadly. "No sir. They had to stabilize him first before it was safe."
"Oh my God. I gotta go scrub."
"Well, Hawk.... Colonel Potter told me not to let you go in there."
"WHAT?! Why the fuck not?!" He wasn't mad at Radar, but the comment hurt him deeply. "He's my BEST friend!! Doesn't that mean ANYTHING?"
"Sir, I'm just telling you what he said. I can go talk to him, but he asked me not to let you in the OR." "That's BULLSHIT!" He cried.
Margaret ran into the office. "What's going on? Pierce, I heard you yelling, what's the matter?"
"That Bastard won't let me into see my friend!"
"Pierce! Corporal is this true?"
"Ma'am Colonel Potter told me to not let him in the OR."
"Pierce, he's only acting on his orders! Don't get mad at him. Radar, can I go talk to the Colonel?"
"He told me you could, but he'd rather I talked to him so, uh, well," He looked at Hawkeye who was seething. He whispered, "He wants you to watch Captain Pierce."
"WHAT? I don't need a damn babysitter! I deserve to see my friend!!"
"Hawkeye, please, just sit down." She sat him on Radar's bunk. "Corporal, could you talk to Colonel Potter?"
"Yes ma'am." He tied on a surgical mask and went through to the OR.
"Hawkeye, please calm down. Now, Radar is just following orders."
"But why the hell can't I go and see Beej?"
"Hawkeye-"
"Look, I am the best damn surgeon in this camp! I'm chief surgeon!"
"Hawkeye, there are patients in the next room, please!" He started yelling and she kissed him quickly. He stopped for a moment and looked at her. "Look at me Hawkeye. I know you are the best surgeon here. Better than Potter and a hell of a lot better than Charles. But, look at the circumstances. He is your best friend. The colonel is just looking out for you... in case something happens, Hawkeye, you know, we don't want-"
"You're afraid it will be like Tommy, aren't you? He was my best friend. But I got over that. And BJ wouldn't die, he can't die!"
"Hawkeye, let's go into my tent and just... wait it out."
"I can't." He stood up and started to pace.
"Sirs Ma'am?" Radar came back into his office with them. "I spoke to Colonel Potter, he said it's too early to tell anything about BJ-er-Captain Hunnicutt's condition. But he wants you two to go get some rest. And we'll come get you as soon as we know anything."
Hawkeye opened his mouth to retaliate and Margaret cut him off. "Thank you Corporal, that will be fine." She stood up in her Major-ly stance and took Hawkeye's hand. "Come along Pierce."
The pair went into the head nurse's tent and the second the door closed behind him Margaret burst into tears, wrapping her arms around Hawkeye's neck and burying her face in his chest. He held back the tears and wrapped his arms around her waist. Soon he couldn't hold it in any longer and the tears poured out of his eyes as he put his face in her hair. Slowly, he guided them over so they were sitting on the cot. He gathered her in his arms and sat against the corner between the wall and her dresser, holding her in his lap.
He rubbed her back. "We'll get through this." He whispered.
"I'm so scared, Hawkeye."
"So am I, Margaret. But we'll get through this together. I love you."
"I love you too." She said against his chest. "But, I love BJ too. Not in the same way, but I love him! You two are my best friends, Hawkeye!"
"I know, I know. I've had best friends that I grew up with, but people I've known for all 27 years of my life I'm not as close to as BJ. We've known each other for almost two years and it feels like forever."
She sniffed. "I know. But..."
"He'll get through this." He finished.
She looked up at him. "He will." He kissed her slowly, but didn't hold on. It wasn't the right time or place, and neither was in the mood.
They spent the next few hours together, holding each other on the cot, talking about BJ and their past with him, the good and the bad. About Erin and Peg, but it made them sad to think about them, and what could happen to them if, well, they couldn't say it. If something ever *happened* to BJ. They laughed a few times but mostly cried together, and held each other as tight as they could. After four hours, the tent now dark as the sun had started to set, a knock came on the door.
"What is it?"
"It's Radar, ma'am. Where's Captain Pierce?"
"He's in here, Corporal. What do you need?"
"The Colonel wishes to speak to the two of you."
Hawkeye and Margaret exchanged looks of fear, and reassuringly, he squeezed her hand as he stood up. "Come on." He led her out of the tent and towards the doors to the scrub room, where Charles and Colonel Potter were coming out of, walking very slowly, with somber faces.
"Colonel Potter, what's-how's-umm-what-?" Hawkeye didn't know what to ask.
Potter slowly pulled off his surgical gloves and looked at the couple, holding onto the other's arm, not daring to let go.
"Well-" The older doctor stated.