Chapter Three - The Pros and Cons
Scully looked at her closed front door for a long, long time wondering how Mulder did it. In one short sentence he had managed to perfectly sum up his reaction to the whole 'kiss thing'.
Why couldn't she do the same? Why did she have to think about everything so much? As Mulder had put it - why couldn't she just feel instead of think?
She told herself that she would have to give all of this some thought and then laughed at herself for falling into the same trap again.
Scully clicked the television back on again just in time to see Jodi painfully watch the execution of her man. Her thoughts drifted back to Mulder and she wondered if they would do the same for each other.
She knew they would. That had to mean something, right?
The movie ended and Scully promptly switched channels to catch the news. This held little interest to her and she waded through the rest of the channels finding nothing to interest her.
She tried to read but couldn't settle into any of her books. She thought about working on her case files but realized she was too fidgety for that as well.
Scully knew what was causing her manic behavior. She wanted to talk to Mulder about 'them' now. Right now.
But looking at the clock she saw that is was getting close to midnight. It was too late to go popping over for a chat.
She would wait until morning - or at least try to.
Scully lasted until about 2:30 when she came to the conclusion that she would drive herself mad if she didn't talk to Mulder immediately. She glanced down at the sweats and t-shirt that she had thrown on hours ago but didn't want to waste the time changing.
She hurried down to her car and headed towards Mulder's apartment. The traffic was sparse because of the late hour and she arrived there in record time.
Scully bound up the stairs and stood in front of his door hand ready to knock when a wave of panic hit her. She froze for a moment having no real idea of what she was going to say to Mulder
She thought briefly about going home but knew that if she did she would only return. "Better to get it over with" she said as she knocked on the door.
It took a couple of minutes but a sleepy-eyed Mulder opened the door wearing nothing but his boxers and a look of apprehension.
"What's wrong Scully?" he said as he rubbed the sleep from his eyes. "Has something happened?"
"Yes, I mean no." she said beginning her pacing again. "Nothing has really happened. I just needed to talk to you."
She stopped then and truly saw for the first time the sleepy man standing in front of her trying hard to stifle a yawn. "I am sorry Mulder. I have no right coming over here in the middle of the night. I'll just leave."
"You will do nothing of the sort" Mulder said "heaven knows I have done this sort of thing to you enough times. You are overdo to reciprocate. Just let me thrown on something a little more decent and then you can tell me whatever it is you need to say."
Mulder disappeared into his bedroom and Scully, suddenly overwrought with guilt, headed for the kitchen to put some coffee on.
Mulder appeared in the kitchen just as it was starting to brew and looked at her with eyebrows raised. He was ready to hear what she had to say.
"I have been giving what you said some thought" she began nervously occupying her hands by readying the coffee cups.
"About what?" Mulder said. He was pretty sure he knew about what she was speaking but wanted to make sure.
"About you and me." She said looking up at him timidly. "If I understood you correctly you were willing to give a relationship between us a try."
Mulder nodded. "From what happened between us in Minneapolis Scully, I thought you wanted the same thing. Has that changed now?"
"Yes and no" Scully said pouring the coffee and handing Mulder his cup.
Mulder said nothing in response but went into the living room and settled himself on the couch. Scully sat in a chair across from him - a detail that he noticed but did not mention. Obviously Scully wanted a bit of space right now.
"Out there, after spending so much time with you I thought it would be fun just to be with you when we got back home. You know, just to have some fun together without the responsibility of work and everything coming between us."
"But you weren't looking for us to have a 'real' relationship?" Mulder kept his voice very steady even though he was beginning to not like the direction in which this conversation was going.
"I wasn't looking for anything in particular really." Scully said staring into her coffee cup. "I figured that things would just work themselves out."
"You don't feel the same way now?" Mulder said watching her carefully as she avoided his gaze.
"I know you think I am making way too much out of it, but this whole 'kiss thing' has totally freaked me out." She sipped her coffee still not looking at him.
"Freaked you out? How so?" Mulder said becoming more interested by the minute. Scully rarely discussed her feelings.
"I felt a huge responsibility because of it. Suddenly I was no longer your partner and your best friend but your 'true love'" she paused a moment as if to gather her thoughts. "I couldn't get my mind around what that meant. To me or to you."
"But that isn't the part that really bothered you, was it?" Mulder said cursing himself for knowing his partner so well.
"No it wasn't. I couldn't help but think what would happen if you weren't mine."
"Yours?"
Scully stopped, took a deep breath and finally looked at him. "What if you aren't my 'true love'?"
Mulder felt his stomach drop at this remark but kept his composure. "I take it you have come to the conclusion that I am not. Not to worry Scully."
She cut him off. "What I mean is that I don't know."
Mulder gave a sigh of relief and waiting for her to continue.
"I know you said I just go with my feelings and not think so much and that is the main reason I am here. I felt I had to talk to you - after all you are my best friend - about this. I don't know what to do?"
Mulder felt some small pangs of sympathy for his partner. It had taken a lot for her to come to him like this. He would try, for her sake to act more like her best friend and less like a potential lover.
"Well Scully" he began "when I am making up my mind about something important I often make a list of pros and cons to help me decide."
"Pros and Cons?" Scully repeated. "Do you think it will help?" She looked desperately close to tears.
"It couldn't hurt" Mulder said "I'll start."
"Pro - he is a very handsome man"
Scully laughed at this "Con - all the women know it."
"They do?" Mulder said smiling at her. "Pro - they know each other inside and out."
"Con - they have a tendency to bicker." Scully retorted smiling at him.
She got up and fetched the coffee pot and refilled each of their cups. This time when she returned to the living room she sat next to him on the couch.
"Pro - they understand each other's work schedule"
"Con - their work may be compromised"
"Pro - her mother adores him."
"Con - her brother hates him." This got Mulder laughing again.
"Pro - they both work for the same boss."
"Con - they both work for the same boss."
"Pro" Mulder turned to her and lifted her chin so he could directly into her eyes. "He would do anything for her."
"Con - except for when he ditches her." Mulder grimaced at this but continued.
"Pro" Mulder said "he adores her"
"Con - what happens to work if he doesn't in the future?"
"Pro" Mulder said "he will worship her body as he explores every inch of it" Scully closed her eyes and tried to block the mental picture of Mulder slowly making his way down her.
"Con - she can't give him children."
"Pro - they could always adopt."
"Really?" Scully said looking at him cautiously.
"Really" Mulder replied as he silenced her list making with a gentle kiss.
Their kiss was a gentle one and when they finally came apart Mulder looked at her. "Well, what do you think?"
Scully looked at him and then down at her folded hands. "Would you hate me forever Mulder, if I told you I needed to sleep on it?"
At this comment Mulder burst out laughing. "I would expect nothing less from you Scully." He said giving her a kiss on the top of her head.
"Take all the time you need. I'm not going anywhere - at least not for awhile." He teased.
She got up and walked to the door pulling him down for a kiss on the cheek before leaving. "Thank you Mulder"
"For what?" Mulder said opening the door.
"For being my best friend when I needed it."
"Scully" he said taking her hand in his "No matter what, I will always be that."
++++++++++++++++++++++++++ end of chapter three - comments, suggestions???? It is too sappy?? Would love to know where you think this story should go.
Scully looked at her closed front door for a long, long time wondering how Mulder did it. In one short sentence he had managed to perfectly sum up his reaction to the whole 'kiss thing'.
Why couldn't she do the same? Why did she have to think about everything so much? As Mulder had put it - why couldn't she just feel instead of think?
She told herself that she would have to give all of this some thought and then laughed at herself for falling into the same trap again.
Scully clicked the television back on again just in time to see Jodi painfully watch the execution of her man. Her thoughts drifted back to Mulder and she wondered if they would do the same for each other.
She knew they would. That had to mean something, right?
The movie ended and Scully promptly switched channels to catch the news. This held little interest to her and she waded through the rest of the channels finding nothing to interest her.
She tried to read but couldn't settle into any of her books. She thought about working on her case files but realized she was too fidgety for that as well.
Scully knew what was causing her manic behavior. She wanted to talk to Mulder about 'them' now. Right now.
But looking at the clock she saw that is was getting close to midnight. It was too late to go popping over for a chat.
She would wait until morning - or at least try to.
Scully lasted until about 2:30 when she came to the conclusion that she would drive herself mad if she didn't talk to Mulder immediately. She glanced down at the sweats and t-shirt that she had thrown on hours ago but didn't want to waste the time changing.
She hurried down to her car and headed towards Mulder's apartment. The traffic was sparse because of the late hour and she arrived there in record time.
Scully bound up the stairs and stood in front of his door hand ready to knock when a wave of panic hit her. She froze for a moment having no real idea of what she was going to say to Mulder
She thought briefly about going home but knew that if she did she would only return. "Better to get it over with" she said as she knocked on the door.
It took a couple of minutes but a sleepy-eyed Mulder opened the door wearing nothing but his boxers and a look of apprehension.
"What's wrong Scully?" he said as he rubbed the sleep from his eyes. "Has something happened?"
"Yes, I mean no." she said beginning her pacing again. "Nothing has really happened. I just needed to talk to you."
She stopped then and truly saw for the first time the sleepy man standing in front of her trying hard to stifle a yawn. "I am sorry Mulder. I have no right coming over here in the middle of the night. I'll just leave."
"You will do nothing of the sort" Mulder said "heaven knows I have done this sort of thing to you enough times. You are overdo to reciprocate. Just let me thrown on something a little more decent and then you can tell me whatever it is you need to say."
Mulder disappeared into his bedroom and Scully, suddenly overwrought with guilt, headed for the kitchen to put some coffee on.
Mulder appeared in the kitchen just as it was starting to brew and looked at her with eyebrows raised. He was ready to hear what she had to say.
"I have been giving what you said some thought" she began nervously occupying her hands by readying the coffee cups.
"About what?" Mulder said. He was pretty sure he knew about what she was speaking but wanted to make sure.
"About you and me." She said looking up at him timidly. "If I understood you correctly you were willing to give a relationship between us a try."
Mulder nodded. "From what happened between us in Minneapolis Scully, I thought you wanted the same thing. Has that changed now?"
"Yes and no" Scully said pouring the coffee and handing Mulder his cup.
Mulder said nothing in response but went into the living room and settled himself on the couch. Scully sat in a chair across from him - a detail that he noticed but did not mention. Obviously Scully wanted a bit of space right now.
"Out there, after spending so much time with you I thought it would be fun just to be with you when we got back home. You know, just to have some fun together without the responsibility of work and everything coming between us."
"But you weren't looking for us to have a 'real' relationship?" Mulder kept his voice very steady even though he was beginning to not like the direction in which this conversation was going.
"I wasn't looking for anything in particular really." Scully said staring into her coffee cup. "I figured that things would just work themselves out."
"You don't feel the same way now?" Mulder said watching her carefully as she avoided his gaze.
"I know you think I am making way too much out of it, but this whole 'kiss thing' has totally freaked me out." She sipped her coffee still not looking at him.
"Freaked you out? How so?" Mulder said becoming more interested by the minute. Scully rarely discussed her feelings.
"I felt a huge responsibility because of it. Suddenly I was no longer your partner and your best friend but your 'true love'" she paused a moment as if to gather her thoughts. "I couldn't get my mind around what that meant. To me or to you."
"But that isn't the part that really bothered you, was it?" Mulder said cursing himself for knowing his partner so well.
"No it wasn't. I couldn't help but think what would happen if you weren't mine."
"Yours?"
Scully stopped, took a deep breath and finally looked at him. "What if you aren't my 'true love'?"
Mulder felt his stomach drop at this remark but kept his composure. "I take it you have come to the conclusion that I am not. Not to worry Scully."
She cut him off. "What I mean is that I don't know."
Mulder gave a sigh of relief and waiting for her to continue.
"I know you said I just go with my feelings and not think so much and that is the main reason I am here. I felt I had to talk to you - after all you are my best friend - about this. I don't know what to do?"
Mulder felt some small pangs of sympathy for his partner. It had taken a lot for her to come to him like this. He would try, for her sake to act more like her best friend and less like a potential lover.
"Well Scully" he began "when I am making up my mind about something important I often make a list of pros and cons to help me decide."
"Pros and Cons?" Scully repeated. "Do you think it will help?" She looked desperately close to tears.
"It couldn't hurt" Mulder said "I'll start."
"Pro - he is a very handsome man"
Scully laughed at this "Con - all the women know it."
"They do?" Mulder said smiling at her. "Pro - they know each other inside and out."
"Con - they have a tendency to bicker." Scully retorted smiling at him.
She got up and fetched the coffee pot and refilled each of their cups. This time when she returned to the living room she sat next to him on the couch.
"Pro - they understand each other's work schedule"
"Con - their work may be compromised"
"Pro - her mother adores him."
"Con - her brother hates him." This got Mulder laughing again.
"Pro - they both work for the same boss."
"Con - they both work for the same boss."
"Pro" Mulder turned to her and lifted her chin so he could directly into her eyes. "He would do anything for her."
"Con - except for when he ditches her." Mulder grimaced at this but continued.
"Pro" Mulder said "he adores her"
"Con - what happens to work if he doesn't in the future?"
"Pro" Mulder said "he will worship her body as he explores every inch of it" Scully closed her eyes and tried to block the mental picture of Mulder slowly making his way down her.
"Con - she can't give him children."
"Pro - they could always adopt."
"Really?" Scully said looking at him cautiously.
"Really" Mulder replied as he silenced her list making with a gentle kiss.
Their kiss was a gentle one and when they finally came apart Mulder looked at her. "Well, what do you think?"
Scully looked at him and then down at her folded hands. "Would you hate me forever Mulder, if I told you I needed to sleep on it?"
At this comment Mulder burst out laughing. "I would expect nothing less from you Scully." He said giving her a kiss on the top of her head.
"Take all the time you need. I'm not going anywhere - at least not for awhile." He teased.
She got up and walked to the door pulling him down for a kiss on the cheek before leaving. "Thank you Mulder"
"For what?" Mulder said opening the door.
"For being my best friend when I needed it."
"Scully" he said taking her hand in his "No matter what, I will always be that."
++++++++++++++++++++++++++ end of chapter three - comments, suggestions???? It is too sappy?? Would love to know where you think this story should go.