The Face of a Shadow

(A/N: How do you people do this to me: smile : Generally from the beginning, I was going to leave 'The Thoughts of a Padawan Learner' as a one chapter, and received so many reviews wanting me to continue with it! So...this is your fault. Yes...all of you. You know who you are, lol. No, joking really...the feedback was excellent and caused me to carry on. I thank you.

Oh, just another warning...now this is from the views of Darth Vader. Alas! Unfortunately, our poor, suffering teenage Anakin Skywalker has slipped to the Dark Side. This could be interesting.)

:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:

Life...as I once knew is now fair to me.

All of the confusion, all of the impatience, all of the ready in waiting is now vanquished. Destroyed in a lifetime. I go back to my earlier thoughts as a darkness waiting to be unfolded, not for a symbol to shine.

I do shine. In only a different way.

Everything seems so much easier now. All of my questions, all of my dreams have been answered. I thought they were only nightmares, long ago...but now I know the truth. They were beholding my future...only my future had nightmarish consequences. So I saw them as only dreams then.

That was when I was young. When I was so...naïve, as one might call it. I had no idea what my own choices could lead me to, that if I backfired against my chosen path it would bring me to victory. Victory…and power.

Power...what a magnificent word. It is what I wanted all my life, what I intended to do with it though, would be a subject matter. My past is left behind me. My choices, decisions taken. And this is where they brought me.

A new power. A new energy, life, a new appearance, voice…a new me.

A better me.

Everything has changed. Changed indeed, but with extraordinary and pleasing changes if not that. I have taken on a new manner, a marvellous transformation in body and mind, even though it frightens others than what it used to be. But that was long ago.

Even my new name causes them to tremble within at the very mention of it. Darth Vader. It sounds so powerful. So powerful and strong, with so much more darkness to it than the fabled Anakin Skywalker. My dreaded slave name.

Besides, I want them to be frightened. I want them to fear me, they deserve to be afraid.

They deserve to be terrified for themselves. But often I think of them as cowards. My own life has been nothing but living in fear, horrific happenings in my times and the suffering I had to endure. My very dreams were tormenting my soul, and bringing me here.

To the Dark Side. Where I belong. Where I was meant to be from the beginning.

I only thank myself, and of course Sidius. The one who showed me the light out of the darkness, and brought down the door of insanity and pain...to show me the way. My one true leader, even as I may say, for it never brings me any guilt or pain in its meaning...

My one true Master. Unlike Obi-Wan.

He and I have moved apart, separated...gone our own ways. I know he has beckoned me to return during the years that he has kept his dignity. Well, I have my own too, Obi-Wan. And I will not use it to come back to your discussion ways, where you never let me speak...give my own ideas. You never let me breathe...often it felt as if I never lived.

I have never forgotten anything he has ever said to me, about how listening to him would gain me the ultimate power. The ultimate Force. Yes…the Force has been grateful to me too. It has become stronger in my will of mind, has gained me so much more than I would have done over time.

It has always been stronger in the Dark Side. Everyone knows that.

And I have used that power so many times for my own liking. I have used it for glory, for receiving my own demands, I must also add...and lastly, I have used it for murder. For destroying others.

Obi-Wan. I killed him today.

He gave in too easily. Age has become caught up on him and brought him to his doom. He looked that of similar to my teenage nightmare. My own lightsabre brought him down. My red weapon. Red for blood, for anger control. Except...a strange feeling inside of me lingers that it was of his own doing. That he wanted me to be rid of him, that it was for some sort of demonstration.

Demonstration. Imagine it, the very idea of his teaching methods.

It was witnessed. Witnessed by hundreds, maybe even thousands of eyes were watching it, not all in the same room...I felt as if the whole world were watching me as I brought him down, dragged him down to the pitiful end that he chose to succumb to.

Luke saw it. Luke Skywalker.

My son.

I understood my dream years ago. The meaning of the 'L' shapes. I was given children, I knew they would always be Padm's, but they were mine too. Mine. Twins, as it seemed. A boy and girl.

I had no restriction to the names, they appeared on the air. Luke and Leia. They seemed to fit.

I never compared them to my dream...until today. They have separated over the years, not in an identical way to Obi-Wan and I, but they have. And I suspect they will find one another again someday. But I do not fear it.

Poor Luke…he is so confused now. He reminds me of myself in a way when I was young. He believes his family are destroyed, though he does not see the truth.

Leia and I are still left. But it all remains in the future. He still needs to understand.

I know that we can all be a family here, and not cause our rivalries to stand in our way. Just imagine it...the three of us now, since Padmé went. Padmé...I miss her still. I loved her so much, but she was also taken from me. I knew that if she were still here, she would also want us to be together. The three of us, controlling. We all belong in the Dark Side, we all deserve to be powerful.

It's what their mother would have wanted. It's what I want too.

Now I see that Luke is taken with anger…anger for me. Soon it will grow into hate.

I will see my advantage and tell him the truth in time. Who I am to him, where he belongs. Where Leia belongs. Where we all belong.

He is breaking the balance between the right and wrong, the good and evil. Soon, I will help him slip into the correct direction, the one that brings him here. His emotions are strong, but they can be taken over. The Shadow will possess him, bring him to me.

Leia will understand too, all in good time.

So many paths for him...they were so many paths for me when I was like him. But I chose the right one, and so should he. It is put out before him, he must see the way.

All of my dreams where explaining what held before me, though I did not notice.

Now I do. Someday, Luke...and even Leia will have their own dreams of what waits before them. And soon, I will gain my ultimate dream. To become the greatest Jedi ever, only darker.

I believe...I already am.

To be concluded

:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:

(A/N: O.K, this was not as difficult as I thought it would be...which kind of scares me a little, lol. It was also a bit shorter than before. I hope this continues the other chapter well, and that it hasn't rushed too much into everything. Please review and tell me what you think of the transformed Anakin, and if I should conclude this with a final chapter, of where he returns to Good. I had that in mind, but I would appreciate feedback also for support. I promise to thank you...yes I do...lol. Thanks!)