Chapter 3: Karaoke Nights
(Disclaimer: I am a poor beggar who owns nothing, that includes Harry Potter, The All-American Rejects and Barney. The only thing I have every owned is the words to the stupid parody songs in this chapter. If you would like to donate cash to me, please contact the fan-fic writers divison of 1-800-Save-An-Orc.)
*Harry, Ron and Hermione are walking back to the dormitory after dinner. They are trailed by Mary-Sue.*
Harry: Look at that! *Points to bullitin board*
All: OOOOOOOOOOOH!
Hermione: *Runs up to board and reads contents out loud* Filch says 1st-year burnings are banned...The flames kept burning the wood floor. He says we can keep up the hangings though...Hmm, there's a Hogsmade day next month and...OOOOH! *Hermione's eyes get really big and she starts jumping up and down* THERES GOING TO BE A KARAOKE CONTEST!!!!
Mary-Sue: Lyke wow!!!!!111 Kewliezz!
Ron: Will you shut up, you tweenie!
Mary-Sue: But I thought you were my boooyyyy-fffrrriieeend!
Ron: Oh yeah! *Starts snogging Mary-Sue*
Harry: Hey, she's my girl! *Starts beating up Ron*
-Meanwhile-
Voldemort: *Saying each word as he types it* Dear Harry,
It may come as a suprise to you, but I love you, you sexy hunk! Now visit my porny, web-cam of doom!
Your Friend Voldemort
Peter: Don't you think you're being a little too staright-forward?
Voldemort: SHUT-UP OR YOU'LL END UP LIKE HIM! *Points to a blood splattered wall where the Minister of Magic is hanging with daggers thrust through his ody*
Peter: Yes, sir!
-The Next Day, On the School Grounds-
Barney: *Stanging on a stage, in a black tux near a bright blue coffin covered in smiley faces. All the students are gathered around.* We are gathered here today for the death of Sir Dumbleydore Bumblebee. Blah, blah, blah. Ya'll get the point, now lets party!
* The grim setting is suddenly turned into a giant party. The crowd of students start ripping off thier black, dress robes to reveal more of Mary-Sue's pimp suits and slutty dresses. Streamers, ballons and confetti start falling from the sky and the Barney throws Dumbledore's corpse into the crowd, the students passing it along as though Dumbledore stage-dived. Professor Sprout is giving Snape a lap dance and Trelawney is dancing the macarana. The house-elves start throwing fire-whisky bottles into the crowd as the Ghosts and Peeves start playing rock music.*
McGonnagol: Now, time for Karaoke!!!!!!! Our first contestant is Harry Potter!
Crowd: WOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! GO HARRY!
Harry: *Walks onto stage* Today, I'll be singing a paraody of the All-American Reject's song, "Swing,Swing". Its called, "My Scar Is Hurting". *Breaks into song and suddenly sounds like Tyson Ritter from the All-American Rejects.*
Dumbledore comes and gos,
I need to talk to him.
He's at the ministry
Saving my fate, that's grim.
Sirius is gone,
I can only talk to Ron,
And I am left with no real family.
Do you think Ron will find,
How to use the phone?
I used to think that I could live,
At Sirius' home.
My scar is hurting...
The DA is doing well,
My life used to be going swell,
Can you help me, find a way to bring Sirius back to life.
Wands thrown into the sky,
Expelliramus.
Learing new spells all day,
While I'm mad at Seamus.
Errol's getting old,
He smells like mold,
And so does Moaning Myrtles toilet.
Do you think Ron will find,
How to use the phone?
I used to think that I could live,
At Sirius' home.
My scar is hurting...
The DA is doing well,
My life used to be going swell,
Can you help me, find a way to bring Sirius back to life.
Harry P...(The main character of the books)
Faeries...(Fly away, away, away)
The DA is doing well,
My life used to be going swell,
Can you help me, find a way to bring Sirius back to life.
My scar is hurting...
The DA is doing well,
My life used to be going swell,
Can you help me, find a way to bring Sirius back to life.
*The song finishes with a guitar solo from Peeves. Harry waves to the crowd and exits the stage as everybody cheers, except for the many fangorls who have fainted.*
-Meanwhile-
Computer: You've Got Mail!
Voldemort: Yes! He replied! *Opens email and reads it out loud* Dear "Voldemort". Leave me alone, you freak! I don't know any Vcoldemorts! I'm calling the police! *Closes email and turns on Wormtail* THAT WASN'T HIS EMAIL ADDRESS!!!!!! *Thrusts a dagger into Wormtails arm*
(Disclaimer: I am a poor beggar who owns nothing, that includes Harry Potter, The All-American Rejects and Barney. The only thing I have every owned is the words to the stupid parody songs in this chapter. If you would like to donate cash to me, please contact the fan-fic writers divison of 1-800-Save-An-Orc.)
*Harry, Ron and Hermione are walking back to the dormitory after dinner. They are trailed by Mary-Sue.*
Harry: Look at that! *Points to bullitin board*
All: OOOOOOOOOOOH!
Hermione: *Runs up to board and reads contents out loud* Filch says 1st-year burnings are banned...The flames kept burning the wood floor. He says we can keep up the hangings though...Hmm, there's a Hogsmade day next month and...OOOOH! *Hermione's eyes get really big and she starts jumping up and down* THERES GOING TO BE A KARAOKE CONTEST!!!!
Mary-Sue: Lyke wow!!!!!111 Kewliezz!
Ron: Will you shut up, you tweenie!
Mary-Sue: But I thought you were my boooyyyy-fffrrriieeend!
Ron: Oh yeah! *Starts snogging Mary-Sue*
Harry: Hey, she's my girl! *Starts beating up Ron*
-Meanwhile-
Voldemort: *Saying each word as he types it* Dear Harry,
It may come as a suprise to you, but I love you, you sexy hunk! Now visit my porny, web-cam of doom!
Your Friend Voldemort
Peter: Don't you think you're being a little too staright-forward?
Voldemort: SHUT-UP OR YOU'LL END UP LIKE HIM! *Points to a blood splattered wall where the Minister of Magic is hanging with daggers thrust through his ody*
Peter: Yes, sir!
-The Next Day, On the School Grounds-
Barney: *Stanging on a stage, in a black tux near a bright blue coffin covered in smiley faces. All the students are gathered around.* We are gathered here today for the death of Sir Dumbleydore Bumblebee. Blah, blah, blah. Ya'll get the point, now lets party!
* The grim setting is suddenly turned into a giant party. The crowd of students start ripping off thier black, dress robes to reveal more of Mary-Sue's pimp suits and slutty dresses. Streamers, ballons and confetti start falling from the sky and the Barney throws Dumbledore's corpse into the crowd, the students passing it along as though Dumbledore stage-dived. Professor Sprout is giving Snape a lap dance and Trelawney is dancing the macarana. The house-elves start throwing fire-whisky bottles into the crowd as the Ghosts and Peeves start playing rock music.*
McGonnagol: Now, time for Karaoke!!!!!!! Our first contestant is Harry Potter!
Crowd: WOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! GO HARRY!
Harry: *Walks onto stage* Today, I'll be singing a paraody of the All-American Reject's song, "Swing,Swing". Its called, "My Scar Is Hurting". *Breaks into song and suddenly sounds like Tyson Ritter from the All-American Rejects.*
Dumbledore comes and gos,
I need to talk to him.
He's at the ministry
Saving my fate, that's grim.
Sirius is gone,
I can only talk to Ron,
And I am left with no real family.
Do you think Ron will find,
How to use the phone?
I used to think that I could live,
At Sirius' home.
My scar is hurting...
The DA is doing well,
My life used to be going swell,
Can you help me, find a way to bring Sirius back to life.
Wands thrown into the sky,
Expelliramus.
Learing new spells all day,
While I'm mad at Seamus.
Errol's getting old,
He smells like mold,
And so does Moaning Myrtles toilet.
Do you think Ron will find,
How to use the phone?
I used to think that I could live,
At Sirius' home.
My scar is hurting...
The DA is doing well,
My life used to be going swell,
Can you help me, find a way to bring Sirius back to life.
Harry P...(The main character of the books)
Faeries...(Fly away, away, away)
The DA is doing well,
My life used to be going swell,
Can you help me, find a way to bring Sirius back to life.
My scar is hurting...
The DA is doing well,
My life used to be going swell,
Can you help me, find a way to bring Sirius back to life.
*The song finishes with a guitar solo from Peeves. Harry waves to the crowd and exits the stage as everybody cheers, except for the many fangorls who have fainted.*
-Meanwhile-
Computer: You've Got Mail!
Voldemort: Yes! He replied! *Opens email and reads it out loud* Dear "Voldemort". Leave me alone, you freak! I don't know any Vcoldemorts! I'm calling the police! *Closes email and turns on Wormtail* THAT WASN'T HIS EMAIL ADDRESS!!!!!! *Thrusts a dagger into Wormtails arm*