I have watched him cry. I have watched him kill. I would have watched him love.

I dreaded the thought, for so many years. The day I would have to watch him turn from me, and see another. I never once thought that he would turn to me. I still do not know how to feel. My heart is as fragile as a snowflake. I should not do this, feel this way. I should guard, not love.

There are so many things I have gotten wrong, so very many things. Somehow I keep being forgiven.

I cannot understand being forgiven.