Me? Own Yugioh? I LAUGH AT YOU ALL!!!
Oh.um..much Tea bashing ensues in this chappie..Tea lovers, please do not comment. Or read..THE PEOPLE WHO WROTE THIS DO NOT LIKE TEA!! THAT WILL BECOME BLATENTLY OBVIOUS AS THE FIC PROCEEDS!!!
Disclaimer: I do not own Yugioh.
Whoa.no Rabid Lawyers this time..who'da thunk it?
Rabid Lawyers: *Arise from various places around the room, much like Jackie Chan's Shadow Khan. *
Hehehehehe...*Pulls out recently "borrowed" Tetsu-Saiga * DIE!!!
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OK, because I was having fun over the weekend, I decided today I needed to kick it into gear. So I strapped on my dueling disk and was lying in wait around 7:30.
Around 8:00 this tall, hott looking duelist saw me (I was hiding in the bushes being sneaky) and called me over.
"What are you doing in the bushes?" I tossed my hair, but a leaf fell out, kind of ruining the effect.
"I was waiting for a good duelist to beat. I didn't want to be challenged to a stupid duel."
He laughed but I could see he was getting out his deck.
"How about a strip duel? OUCH!" I had kicked him really hard.
"YOU FOOING (Only I didn't say fooing!) PERVERT!!!" I tossed my hair again. "Besides, I don't want to see you naked. And I doubt my boyfriend would want me to see you naked."
He sat there rubbing his face. "Who's your boyfriend?"
"Yugi Moto, King of Games!"
"That idio - YEOWCH!!!!" (I kind of drop-kicked him.)
"Don't you DARE insult my boyfriend!!"
Just then Alli and Mokuba walk by. Mokuba's like, "Now he's in for it!!"
"Now you're gonna duel me and you're gonna pay!!" I was so mad I practically spat at the kid.
"Let's DUEL!"
By that time a whole group of twittering girls were chanting his name, Yonto. What kind of fruit name is that?!?!
I drew my five cards, and YES! Maid of Mystery was the highest monster I could start out with. And, I had Spirit of Fire too. Hmm, Secret Archer, not bad. Ooh, now THAT'S a nasty trap! Heheh!!
"I'll lay Maid of mystery in attack mode, and this card face down."
"I'll counter your attack with Snake Tamer! Attack!"
I calmly picked a card, then activated my facedown trap.
"Why thank you, Yonto! I needed that nice 'ole Snake Tamer. He'll me getting a slight make over, though."
I had layed Take and Change down. Soon Maid of Mystery had taken Snake Tamer and transformed him into an exact replica of herself.
"Now, I'll sacrifice them to bring out my powerful Rose of the Samurai!"
A female samurai leapt out of the card, her straight sword pointed right at Yonto. "Now attack his life points!"
Those idiotic girls were standing stupidly at Yonto, as he plummeted to 3000.
"Fine, I'll play Desert Serpent, in defence mode. And this Tr - Card face down."
Now all he was doing was bluffing. Or was he? He didn't have the brains. Or did he?
I drew a card, and then struggled to keep my face dispassionate. YES!! The Sword of the Samurai Magic Card!
"I play this card face down, and end my turn."
Yonto drew his next card. "I lay this card, facedown."
I drew another card. Yes! "I play the Sticky Finger Card!!"
Yonto looked a tad nervous. "Wh-what's that?"
I'll tell you the rest later, 'cause it's my turn to kill - I mean, cook tonight!
Tell ya later!!
Crissy Valentine
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Am I ever grateful that I have my card back!! Thank goodness that my wonderful boyfriend was RIGHT there when I needed him.
A good thing did come from my loss, however. I got to be all sentimental/emotional breakdown-ey so that Malik could comfort me.. But hey, who was acting? .Oh, but that wasn't what I was talking about! Ah hem! I learned that us Valentine sisters are not (despite what we may think) invincible.
BUT, that was yesterday. I'm still a bit shaken and uncertain about my dueling skills, but oh well. I won't let THAT stop me.
Anyway, I wake up to this stupid news report, so I hit my alarm. I fall back asleep until the doorbell rings. I FORGOT THAT MALIK WAS GOING TO PICK ME UP!!
We had decided to go to a movie, then shop. (We kinda had to compromise since I wanted to shop and he.he chose the movie.)
I swore at my alarm and hurriedly got ready. Malik was outside, playing tic-tac-toe with himself with chalk when I finally opened the door.
"Who's winning?"
Malik looks up and smiles, then says with mock distress, "Not me!"
We drove to the movie theatre and "saw" Catch M e if You Can. I'd already seen it, though.but I didn't mind.
On the way to the mall, we drove past Bakura's house. Fuzzy was at the window sill. He looked so sad!! Urg! I hope that Bakura hasn't been mean to the little guy!
I shook off the thoughts of my ex boyfriend. I have a wonderful boyfriend now, so HE doesn't matter.
We were in the food court getting some ice cream when James walks up. I'm thinking, "Great! Just what I need!" Urg..why doesn't that stupid jerk just give up??
"Just ignore him," I say to Malik as James saunters up. Yeah, like that's gonna happen when James starts openly hitting on me.
Malik stands up, fists brandished, but I shook my head. "James," I said, "Meet Malik, my boyfriend."
His eyes get bigger and bigger, but then he says, "Oh, sorry, I thought you were a girl!'
Oh dear. He's in for it now. Malik flies at him, fist raised. A crowd gathers chanting "Fight, fight, fight, fight!!!"
All too soon, James is reduced to a whimpering coward, huddling in a corner begging for mercy. We leave to thunderous applause.
Aundaine Valentine
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OMG!!! That Tea.person/girl/thing is the most annoying, traitorous, sappy (I'm being kind! I avoided all swearwords, didn't I?) girl I have ever met. Honestly!
We had a picnic in the park, including Crissy, Alli, Alenka, Daine, and I w/our wonderful b/f's (Excluding Malik) and it was going to be so completely romantic, and we were all so ready for it!
But naturally, it had to be ruined. This time, by Crissy's um..supposed 'rival', Tea. Sadly enough, she's Tristan's new girlfriend. I almost felt sorry for her. Then she opened her mouth.
She started by kind of giving Crissy the cold shoulder accompanied by evil glares. That's fine, it's not my problem, right? Then she said my shoes didn't match my top. OK, so they didn't! I was in a rush this morning to see Seto, wouldn't you be? But there's no reason to say so! Then she goes to Daine and Alli and Alenka and mouths off to them!
Then (Oh she's gonna get it now) commits the ultimate crime. She flirts with Seto. If she plans to be alive and well by the end of the week, she is gonna be sadly disappointed.
After a lunch of more insults from Tea, vehement exclamations under most of our breaths, I'd say it's safe to predict Tea has at least 5 female enemies, all of which will hold terrible grudges. Valentine sisters hold their grudges WELL over the normal 7 years. And we aren't silent about it. If you're on our list, trust me, the best advice I can give you is to run as fast as your legs will carry you.
We finished the grueling picnic of doom, were driven home, and the three of us immediately ran to the phones to get on a 5 way conversation with Alli and Alenka. We decided after a ½ hour of venting that we'd have a sleepover. Here. 1 hour. Bring every possible plan to get rid of/back at Tea.
After consuming various kinds of Girlscout cookies, unsalty pretzels, and whatever other snacky food we could find in the house, we began to plan. It's quite fun to play evil sadistic people and drum your fingers thinking up plans.
We came up with stupid ideas including Alenka's "Bomb her with green apples!" Alli's, "Attack her with chickens hidden in her house!" Daine's, "Make her eat Jewel's cooking!" (I thoroughly resent that comment!) Crissy's, "Stick her on a bucking horse!" and my pitiful, "Attack her with Kendo sticks!" In broad daylight. With weapons we don't know how to use properly. Sure. Well, I was eating the unsalty pretzels, give me a break!
Hehehehe..I'll tell you all later what we finally decided on..after we pull it off. It's great, humiliating for Tea, and cannot possibly point back to us! Perfection!!!
Jewel Valentine.
PS: DIE TEA!!! I mean, uh..let peace and caring be bestowed upon you? I am such a liar!! It feels good!
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Hahahahaha!!!! Girl Scout cookies ROCK for coming up with evil plans!! So after the Picnic of Terror, me and the other pissed off females of our group came over to our (*Sigh * Not Yugi's) house for a planning/absolutely no sleeping over party deal!
Mai took on look at our face, then made a lame excuse to leave the house.
"Uh, I gotta, um, go and get some, um, lipgloss!! Uh, have, erm, fun!" And away she goes.
After the repeated battering of pillows, we settled down with a mountain of salty/sugary/caffeinated snacks to help our creative juices.
So after a really long period of lame ideas, we began to piece together the PERFECT revenge plan!
"Tea likes to dance, right?" Alli was busy stuffing sugar cookies to help her thinking.
"So?" Daine was kinda dreaming of whatever heroic thing Malik did to save Fuzzy. (Um..right.But who knows?)
"So, that's her weak spot." Jewel pointed out. (We were now sounding like professionals!)
"What about we take her dancing? I mean, then, whatever comes next would target her dancing." I took a swig from my third Mountain Dew.
"How about.." Daine started out the perfect plan, Alli and Jewel worked out the finer details, and Alenka and I worked out the final crowning piece.
At the end of the night (and beginning of the day) we had the perfect plan. So around 11:00, I called Tea.
"Hi!"
"Hey, Tea?"
"Yeah?"
"This is Crissy, and I'd like to apologize. I mean, me and my friends all acted like jerks to you. So, I'd like to invite you dancing. Yugi's told me what a great dancer you are, so I hoped you'd give us some pointers."
Behind me, Alenka, Daine, Jewel and Alli were holding their hands over their mouths trying their HARDEST not to break out laughing. Tea ate it up, just like Alenka said she would.
"Well, I suppose, well, yeah, apology accepted! And don't worry, I won't make you look TOO bad on the dance floor."
"I'll see ya tonight! We'll pick you up!"
The plan had begun!! *Evil Laughter!! *
Around 8:00 that night, we picked Tea up. We all were dressed to go clubbing, so our outfits were pretty wild, but we were tame compared to Tea! She had bright, bright hot pink tights, these clog things, a yellow/black bumble bee mini skirt number, and a feather (yeah, that's right, FEATHER) tube tope that was pink, black, and yellow. Well, at least she matched.I guess..
So, before we died laughing, we drove Jewel's limo (well, actually the cabby drove) to this totally hip (and always packed) stage house.
If you get called up on the Stage, you have to be a really good dancer. And there's usually some talent scouts hanging around. So it was absolutely perfect for our revenge.
We got inside, then began to dance. The stage house's famous star search spotlight began to whiz around, looking for the best dancers..or, for Tea. You see, the guy who owned the stage house was a good friend of Uncle Yotalka. We gave him a tip off about our revenge, so he agreed to help us.
The spotlight finally stopped on Tea.
"Will the young lady in the feather shirt, please, go, to, the, ST-A- A-AGE!!!!!" Everybody began to cheer. We pretended to cheer and be all excited for her. Then, the live back began to play a song we wrote special for just this occasion: (Although (duh) Tea didn't know that!)
I'm a dancer to the core
And my momma wasn't too strong
So she dropped me on the floor
It's not my fault that I can't dance
That I act like I have bugs in my pants
So humor me and clap awhile
While I dance, just nod and smile
And try not to compare me to a headless chicken
Because while I cannot dance
At least I'm alive and kickin!!
There was more, but it was drowned out by people laughing. It was priceless!!
Tea was dancing, trying to act all macho until she heard the lyrics. Then she totally flew off the handle at the band, and began to yell at them. Security was called, and Tea was dragged screaming from the stage.
They almost took her from the building, but Jewel stopped them.
"Please, she's with us!"
Me 'n' Daine went up next to her.
"Yeah!"
The guards squinted at Jewel.
"Hey, you're Seto Kaiba's girlfriend, aren't you?"
Jewel positively preened! This was an unexpected bonus, considering how Tea was mercilessly flirting with Seto at the picnic.
"You guys make a great couple."
JACKPOT!!! This was absolutely SWEET!!! Oh happy, happy joy, joy!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
So Tea was allowed to stay inside, as long as she didn't attack anyone else. She pretty much sat in a corner and sulked.
And it was only the frosting on the cake when the spotlight landed on us later. For real. And we didn't even ask Uncle Yotalka's friend to do that! But, it's understandable, because the Valentines, Alenka and Alli have got the moves!
Needless to say, while we jammed it up on stage Tea called a cab home. So we didn't even have to put up with her for the rest of the night!!!
Oof, am I ever tired. I'll sign off now with this final message:
REVENGE ROX!!!
Crissy Valentine
PS: OMG!!! I totally forgot about the end of my duel!! Well, I promise I'll tell all next time!!
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Revenge, revenge, so sweet.though not as sweet as these Girl Scout cookies.but that's not the point! Anyway, we got our sweet revenge on that stupid sap last night. The look on her face was priceless!! I hope she'll think next time before she tries to get between us Valentines and our bishies!
OMG! I didn't talk to malik all day yesterday! I was debating whether or not to call him (It was a debate because it was like 6 o'clock in the morning..) when the phone rang. My sisters were out, so it had to be Malik!!
I pick up the phone, "Hello?"
"Aundaine?"
I brightened. "Malik? How are you? I'm sorry I didn't call yesterday. Did you get Fuzzy?"
He pauses for a moment. "Not exactly."
So I find myself driving to the hospital, worrying because my boyfriend hurt himself, and wouldn't tell me what happened.
I walk into this room, and here is my boyfriend, trying to look all macho with his leg suspended in air, in this huge cast. He smiles, "Hi?"
"WHAT did you DO??"
"Ermm..well, you see.."
Then he goes into this detailed story about how he rescues Fuzzy. Fuzzy runs away because he was scared of some guy riding a motorcycle. Fuzzy runs into the path of an (get this) oncoming semi truck. Malik apparently jumps and knocks aside Fuzzy, getting his leg run over.
Ahem, my boyfriend sucks at lying.
"OK. What really happened?"
Malik sighs. "Seto, Yugi and I were trying to decide where to take you guys next. Then we see this monkey, right? And I'm like, 'Dude, I bet I could catch that monkey!' and Kaiba goes 'I can catch it faster!' We ended up placing bets, and the monkey disappeared, so we split up. I saw the monkey in a tree ahead, so I climb it." He shrugged. "I fell.."
"Your first excuse was better."
Malik tried to get up. "OUCH!"
"Stupid! I believe you now!"
I spent the rest of the day at the hospital with Malik. His ankle is not broken, but severely sprained.
I can't wait to tell my sisters Malik's story..excuse.erm.about the monkey.
Aundaine Valentine
PS: A semi truck?
PPS: A MONKEY?
PPPS: Reminding myself to teach Malik how to lie properly.
PPPPS: Last one, I swear. On second (or fourth) thought, don't teach Malik to lie. 1) He's cute when he grasps at straws and 2) I'll always be able to tell if he's telling the truth or not. Hehehehe!! (
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MY BISHIE HAS BEEN MORTALLY WOUNDED!!
K, maybe not. But close enough.
I get this call today, from Seto, saying, "Umm.could you come to the hospital?"
I'm like, this is weird..he doesn't know Serenity, does he? So I'm like, "Sure! Are you checking in on Serenity?"
"Who's Serenity? And.erm.it's me."
"Oh.my God! What HAPPENED!?? Are you OK?? What did you DO???? When are you getting out? Is it fatal?? How did this happen?? When did this happen???" I think I just kinda kept spluttering helplessly.
"Calm DOWN!" he interrupted me. "I'm OK. Just come down, OK?"
I swear I have never broken more speeding limits or had more opportunities for speeding tickets in my entire life.
I get to the hospital and Seto is sitting there with an ice pack on his head.
"You made me drive 70 mph and you've only got a bruise on your head?" I was seriously ticked. I had to outrun a cop to get here!!
"I didn't KNOW you'd drive like Daine to get here! Give me pity!! It was a POSSIBLE concussion!"
Deep, calming breaths. In and out. Repeat.
"Ok, fine. So what happened, anyway?"
"Umm.well.you see.*cough *"
"Yes..?"
"I got run over by a semi-truck?"
"Your head..*snicker * ..got run over.. *giggle * ..by a SEMI- TRUCK.*snorts * ..and you escaped with a bruise??!!!" *Peals of laughter *
"Yes?"
"Exactly how bad of a concussion did they say you had?"
"None, actually, but that's not the point, now is it?"
"Um.yeah.would you like to give me a BELIEVABLE excuse now? Preferably one that's TRUE?!?!"
"Well you see.."
He goes into this story where he, Yugi, Malik, and Mokuba were attempting to plan a romatic dinner for us.(How.sweet. He's still lying.) He gave me plans of moonlit walks, bonfires, roses, wonderful things like that. I love my b/f. He's so completely perfect..besides the lying thing..
Apparently they had no Girl Scout cookies to eat, because they could NOT come up with an adequate plan.
Seto jumped into his helicopter, asking everyone to follow him because it's 'easier to think while you're in the sky.'
"And then.Yugi pushed me out of the door."
Still kinda disbelieving. I've met Yugi - he's not the murdering type.
"And you managed this without breaking your neck.how?"
*Mumbles * "It was over a really tall building."
"K, next question - why was the door open?"
"It was too warm?"
"You have an air conditioner!"
"It was broken?"
"You HAVE more than one! Why'd you take the broken one?"
"It broke on the way?"
"You are such a bad liar."
He grins sheepishly at me, "You're too beautiful to lie to."
*Giggles* "I'll forgive you for three reasons. One: That was a perfect response. Two: You are too cute when you try to lie to me, and three: You are GOING to tell me the REAL story NOW!!! Ok? OK!" *Smiling Sweetly*
So he launches into the real story. 'Bout time, too. Apparently, they were planning a romantic date for us. However, they then saw a (oh dear lord help us) monkey. They then began betting who could catch the monkey first. Is this normal behavior? Or is this just some nonunderstandable guy thing?
Seto Yugi and Mokuba took the helicopter and Malik tried on foot. Still pretty normal, right?
Then they discover the monkey hitch hiked on the helicopter. On the runner steppy things of the helicopter, to be precise.
Well, they all tried climbing on the runners WHILE the helicopter is in motion. Smart guys, real smart.
Well, Yugi 'accidentally' pushed Seto (shame to you Yugi! J/K, you're all idiots.) off the helicopter, thank goodness it was over one of those buildings that are like a mini park, so he only fell thru trees and then onto soft grass. But he still managed to land on his head. (Tarzan he is not.)
So apparently Mokuba started to LAUGH at them. So he accidentally let go and fell in the same park, landing unscathed. Leaving Yugi alone in the chopper. Great.
Though Yugi IS crowned the King of Games, he has never flown a helicopter. This is the part where I surrender to the laughter I've been holding back, so Seto had to stop and let me recover before he could continue.
Seto (thankfully) had his headset on and could communicate with Yugi, so he told him how to land. Though, I'm not completely sure he did it of his won free will. He may have left Yugi to his own devices, I believe, if Mokuba hadn't been there.
They lost the monkey for, like, about an hour, never saw Malik, and finally found it again.
On Yugi's head. *Snicker *
Mokuba saw it and did a football tackle on Yugi (how he managed that I will contemplate as soon as I figure out how he won the break dancing contest.) but still lost the monkey.
And he ended with the sheepish, "And Yugi was ran over by a bike and is getting stitches."
*Sigh* "Do you have a phone?" I had to call Crissy. She'd kill me if I didn't tell her that Yugi was injured.
"Here," he hands me a KC pin. "Say the name and it'll dial. Just talk normally." So after a talk with a nearly spazzing Crissy, she rushed down here. I didn't tell her how Yugi got injured, though. I honestly didn't think I could tell the story with out laughing.
"Let's see where that bruise mark is." I began.
"You'll recognize the spot. Look directly where you first hit me with that shoe."
Crap. He still remembers.
Jewel Valentine.
PS: WHY is my b/f incapable of lying to me properly? Not that I'm questioning it or anything, but come on!!
PPS: Where did he get the idea of a SEMI-TRUCK??
PPS: Why do boys isist on being dorks? Why would you decide, 'Hey, let's chase after that monkey!; Is this their idea of a new sport?
PPPS: Is it normal for b/f's to look cuter when they're lying?
PPPPS: Why do I have so many PS's? I could have fit this in before my signature! Oh well. And I WILL go out and duel tomorrow, I swear it!!
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OK, people, y'all know what to do! Read and review!! All flames will be consumed by Crissy's Fire Unicorn, dissipated by Jewel's Water Unicorn, and the people who made them will be chased down by Daine's Lightning Unicorn. Happy? Good.
So press the little button.
It's right there.
TYPE!!
DO IT!!!!!!!!!!
Oh.um..much Tea bashing ensues in this chappie..Tea lovers, please do not comment. Or read..THE PEOPLE WHO WROTE THIS DO NOT LIKE TEA!! THAT WILL BECOME BLATENTLY OBVIOUS AS THE FIC PROCEEDS!!!
Disclaimer: I do not own Yugioh.
Whoa.no Rabid Lawyers this time..who'da thunk it?
Rabid Lawyers: *Arise from various places around the room, much like Jackie Chan's Shadow Khan. *
Hehehehehe...*Pulls out recently "borrowed" Tetsu-Saiga * DIE!!!
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OK, because I was having fun over the weekend, I decided today I needed to kick it into gear. So I strapped on my dueling disk and was lying in wait around 7:30.
Around 8:00 this tall, hott looking duelist saw me (I was hiding in the bushes being sneaky) and called me over.
"What are you doing in the bushes?" I tossed my hair, but a leaf fell out, kind of ruining the effect.
"I was waiting for a good duelist to beat. I didn't want to be challenged to a stupid duel."
He laughed but I could see he was getting out his deck.
"How about a strip duel? OUCH!" I had kicked him really hard.
"YOU FOOING (Only I didn't say fooing!) PERVERT!!!" I tossed my hair again. "Besides, I don't want to see you naked. And I doubt my boyfriend would want me to see you naked."
He sat there rubbing his face. "Who's your boyfriend?"
"Yugi Moto, King of Games!"
"That idio - YEOWCH!!!!" (I kind of drop-kicked him.)
"Don't you DARE insult my boyfriend!!"
Just then Alli and Mokuba walk by. Mokuba's like, "Now he's in for it!!"
"Now you're gonna duel me and you're gonna pay!!" I was so mad I practically spat at the kid.
"Let's DUEL!"
By that time a whole group of twittering girls were chanting his name, Yonto. What kind of fruit name is that?!?!
I drew my five cards, and YES! Maid of Mystery was the highest monster I could start out with. And, I had Spirit of Fire too. Hmm, Secret Archer, not bad. Ooh, now THAT'S a nasty trap! Heheh!!
"I'll lay Maid of mystery in attack mode, and this card face down."
"I'll counter your attack with Snake Tamer! Attack!"
I calmly picked a card, then activated my facedown trap.
"Why thank you, Yonto! I needed that nice 'ole Snake Tamer. He'll me getting a slight make over, though."
I had layed Take and Change down. Soon Maid of Mystery had taken Snake Tamer and transformed him into an exact replica of herself.
"Now, I'll sacrifice them to bring out my powerful Rose of the Samurai!"
A female samurai leapt out of the card, her straight sword pointed right at Yonto. "Now attack his life points!"
Those idiotic girls were standing stupidly at Yonto, as he plummeted to 3000.
"Fine, I'll play Desert Serpent, in defence mode. And this Tr - Card face down."
Now all he was doing was bluffing. Or was he? He didn't have the brains. Or did he?
I drew a card, and then struggled to keep my face dispassionate. YES!! The Sword of the Samurai Magic Card!
"I play this card face down, and end my turn."
Yonto drew his next card. "I lay this card, facedown."
I drew another card. Yes! "I play the Sticky Finger Card!!"
Yonto looked a tad nervous. "Wh-what's that?"
I'll tell you the rest later, 'cause it's my turn to kill - I mean, cook tonight!
Tell ya later!!
Crissy Valentine
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Am I ever grateful that I have my card back!! Thank goodness that my wonderful boyfriend was RIGHT there when I needed him.
A good thing did come from my loss, however. I got to be all sentimental/emotional breakdown-ey so that Malik could comfort me.. But hey, who was acting? .Oh, but that wasn't what I was talking about! Ah hem! I learned that us Valentine sisters are not (despite what we may think) invincible.
BUT, that was yesterday. I'm still a bit shaken and uncertain about my dueling skills, but oh well. I won't let THAT stop me.
Anyway, I wake up to this stupid news report, so I hit my alarm. I fall back asleep until the doorbell rings. I FORGOT THAT MALIK WAS GOING TO PICK ME UP!!
We had decided to go to a movie, then shop. (We kinda had to compromise since I wanted to shop and he.he chose the movie.)
I swore at my alarm and hurriedly got ready. Malik was outside, playing tic-tac-toe with himself with chalk when I finally opened the door.
"Who's winning?"
Malik looks up and smiles, then says with mock distress, "Not me!"
We drove to the movie theatre and "saw" Catch M e if You Can. I'd already seen it, though.but I didn't mind.
On the way to the mall, we drove past Bakura's house. Fuzzy was at the window sill. He looked so sad!! Urg! I hope that Bakura hasn't been mean to the little guy!
I shook off the thoughts of my ex boyfriend. I have a wonderful boyfriend now, so HE doesn't matter.
We were in the food court getting some ice cream when James walks up. I'm thinking, "Great! Just what I need!" Urg..why doesn't that stupid jerk just give up??
"Just ignore him," I say to Malik as James saunters up. Yeah, like that's gonna happen when James starts openly hitting on me.
Malik stands up, fists brandished, but I shook my head. "James," I said, "Meet Malik, my boyfriend."
His eyes get bigger and bigger, but then he says, "Oh, sorry, I thought you were a girl!'
Oh dear. He's in for it now. Malik flies at him, fist raised. A crowd gathers chanting "Fight, fight, fight, fight!!!"
All too soon, James is reduced to a whimpering coward, huddling in a corner begging for mercy. We leave to thunderous applause.
Aundaine Valentine
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OMG!!! That Tea.person/girl/thing is the most annoying, traitorous, sappy (I'm being kind! I avoided all swearwords, didn't I?) girl I have ever met. Honestly!
We had a picnic in the park, including Crissy, Alli, Alenka, Daine, and I w/our wonderful b/f's (Excluding Malik) and it was going to be so completely romantic, and we were all so ready for it!
But naturally, it had to be ruined. This time, by Crissy's um..supposed 'rival', Tea. Sadly enough, she's Tristan's new girlfriend. I almost felt sorry for her. Then she opened her mouth.
She started by kind of giving Crissy the cold shoulder accompanied by evil glares. That's fine, it's not my problem, right? Then she said my shoes didn't match my top. OK, so they didn't! I was in a rush this morning to see Seto, wouldn't you be? But there's no reason to say so! Then she goes to Daine and Alli and Alenka and mouths off to them!
Then (Oh she's gonna get it now) commits the ultimate crime. She flirts with Seto. If she plans to be alive and well by the end of the week, she is gonna be sadly disappointed.
After a lunch of more insults from Tea, vehement exclamations under most of our breaths, I'd say it's safe to predict Tea has at least 5 female enemies, all of which will hold terrible grudges. Valentine sisters hold their grudges WELL over the normal 7 years. And we aren't silent about it. If you're on our list, trust me, the best advice I can give you is to run as fast as your legs will carry you.
We finished the grueling picnic of doom, were driven home, and the three of us immediately ran to the phones to get on a 5 way conversation with Alli and Alenka. We decided after a ½ hour of venting that we'd have a sleepover. Here. 1 hour. Bring every possible plan to get rid of/back at Tea.
After consuming various kinds of Girlscout cookies, unsalty pretzels, and whatever other snacky food we could find in the house, we began to plan. It's quite fun to play evil sadistic people and drum your fingers thinking up plans.
We came up with stupid ideas including Alenka's "Bomb her with green apples!" Alli's, "Attack her with chickens hidden in her house!" Daine's, "Make her eat Jewel's cooking!" (I thoroughly resent that comment!) Crissy's, "Stick her on a bucking horse!" and my pitiful, "Attack her with Kendo sticks!" In broad daylight. With weapons we don't know how to use properly. Sure. Well, I was eating the unsalty pretzels, give me a break!
Hehehehe..I'll tell you all later what we finally decided on..after we pull it off. It's great, humiliating for Tea, and cannot possibly point back to us! Perfection!!!
Jewel Valentine.
PS: DIE TEA!!! I mean, uh..let peace and caring be bestowed upon you? I am such a liar!! It feels good!
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Hahahahaha!!!! Girl Scout cookies ROCK for coming up with evil plans!! So after the Picnic of Terror, me and the other pissed off females of our group came over to our (*Sigh * Not Yugi's) house for a planning/absolutely no sleeping over party deal!
Mai took on look at our face, then made a lame excuse to leave the house.
"Uh, I gotta, um, go and get some, um, lipgloss!! Uh, have, erm, fun!" And away she goes.
After the repeated battering of pillows, we settled down with a mountain of salty/sugary/caffeinated snacks to help our creative juices.
So after a really long period of lame ideas, we began to piece together the PERFECT revenge plan!
"Tea likes to dance, right?" Alli was busy stuffing sugar cookies to help her thinking.
"So?" Daine was kinda dreaming of whatever heroic thing Malik did to save Fuzzy. (Um..right.But who knows?)
"So, that's her weak spot." Jewel pointed out. (We were now sounding like professionals!)
"What about we take her dancing? I mean, then, whatever comes next would target her dancing." I took a swig from my third Mountain Dew.
"How about.." Daine started out the perfect plan, Alli and Jewel worked out the finer details, and Alenka and I worked out the final crowning piece.
At the end of the night (and beginning of the day) we had the perfect plan. So around 11:00, I called Tea.
"Hi!"
"Hey, Tea?"
"Yeah?"
"This is Crissy, and I'd like to apologize. I mean, me and my friends all acted like jerks to you. So, I'd like to invite you dancing. Yugi's told me what a great dancer you are, so I hoped you'd give us some pointers."
Behind me, Alenka, Daine, Jewel and Alli were holding their hands over their mouths trying their HARDEST not to break out laughing. Tea ate it up, just like Alenka said she would.
"Well, I suppose, well, yeah, apology accepted! And don't worry, I won't make you look TOO bad on the dance floor."
"I'll see ya tonight! We'll pick you up!"
The plan had begun!! *Evil Laughter!! *
Around 8:00 that night, we picked Tea up. We all were dressed to go clubbing, so our outfits were pretty wild, but we were tame compared to Tea! She had bright, bright hot pink tights, these clog things, a yellow/black bumble bee mini skirt number, and a feather (yeah, that's right, FEATHER) tube tope that was pink, black, and yellow. Well, at least she matched.I guess..
So, before we died laughing, we drove Jewel's limo (well, actually the cabby drove) to this totally hip (and always packed) stage house.
If you get called up on the Stage, you have to be a really good dancer. And there's usually some talent scouts hanging around. So it was absolutely perfect for our revenge.
We got inside, then began to dance. The stage house's famous star search spotlight began to whiz around, looking for the best dancers..or, for Tea. You see, the guy who owned the stage house was a good friend of Uncle Yotalka. We gave him a tip off about our revenge, so he agreed to help us.
The spotlight finally stopped on Tea.
"Will the young lady in the feather shirt, please, go, to, the, ST-A- A-AGE!!!!!" Everybody began to cheer. We pretended to cheer and be all excited for her. Then, the live back began to play a song we wrote special for just this occasion: (Although (duh) Tea didn't know that!)
I'm a dancer to the core
And my momma wasn't too strong
So she dropped me on the floor
It's not my fault that I can't dance
That I act like I have bugs in my pants
So humor me and clap awhile
While I dance, just nod and smile
And try not to compare me to a headless chicken
Because while I cannot dance
At least I'm alive and kickin!!
There was more, but it was drowned out by people laughing. It was priceless!!
Tea was dancing, trying to act all macho until she heard the lyrics. Then she totally flew off the handle at the band, and began to yell at them. Security was called, and Tea was dragged screaming from the stage.
They almost took her from the building, but Jewel stopped them.
"Please, she's with us!"
Me 'n' Daine went up next to her.
"Yeah!"
The guards squinted at Jewel.
"Hey, you're Seto Kaiba's girlfriend, aren't you?"
Jewel positively preened! This was an unexpected bonus, considering how Tea was mercilessly flirting with Seto at the picnic.
"You guys make a great couple."
JACKPOT!!! This was absolutely SWEET!!! Oh happy, happy joy, joy!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
So Tea was allowed to stay inside, as long as she didn't attack anyone else. She pretty much sat in a corner and sulked.
And it was only the frosting on the cake when the spotlight landed on us later. For real. And we didn't even ask Uncle Yotalka's friend to do that! But, it's understandable, because the Valentines, Alenka and Alli have got the moves!
Needless to say, while we jammed it up on stage Tea called a cab home. So we didn't even have to put up with her for the rest of the night!!!
Oof, am I ever tired. I'll sign off now with this final message:
REVENGE ROX!!!
Crissy Valentine
PS: OMG!!! I totally forgot about the end of my duel!! Well, I promise I'll tell all next time!!
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Revenge, revenge, so sweet.though not as sweet as these Girl Scout cookies.but that's not the point! Anyway, we got our sweet revenge on that stupid sap last night. The look on her face was priceless!! I hope she'll think next time before she tries to get between us Valentines and our bishies!
OMG! I didn't talk to malik all day yesterday! I was debating whether or not to call him (It was a debate because it was like 6 o'clock in the morning..) when the phone rang. My sisters were out, so it had to be Malik!!
I pick up the phone, "Hello?"
"Aundaine?"
I brightened. "Malik? How are you? I'm sorry I didn't call yesterday. Did you get Fuzzy?"
He pauses for a moment. "Not exactly."
So I find myself driving to the hospital, worrying because my boyfriend hurt himself, and wouldn't tell me what happened.
I walk into this room, and here is my boyfriend, trying to look all macho with his leg suspended in air, in this huge cast. He smiles, "Hi?"
"WHAT did you DO??"
"Ermm..well, you see.."
Then he goes into this detailed story about how he rescues Fuzzy. Fuzzy runs away because he was scared of some guy riding a motorcycle. Fuzzy runs into the path of an (get this) oncoming semi truck. Malik apparently jumps and knocks aside Fuzzy, getting his leg run over.
Ahem, my boyfriend sucks at lying.
"OK. What really happened?"
Malik sighs. "Seto, Yugi and I were trying to decide where to take you guys next. Then we see this monkey, right? And I'm like, 'Dude, I bet I could catch that monkey!' and Kaiba goes 'I can catch it faster!' We ended up placing bets, and the monkey disappeared, so we split up. I saw the monkey in a tree ahead, so I climb it." He shrugged. "I fell.."
"Your first excuse was better."
Malik tried to get up. "OUCH!"
"Stupid! I believe you now!"
I spent the rest of the day at the hospital with Malik. His ankle is not broken, but severely sprained.
I can't wait to tell my sisters Malik's story..excuse.erm.about the monkey.
Aundaine Valentine
PS: A semi truck?
PPS: A MONKEY?
PPPS: Reminding myself to teach Malik how to lie properly.
PPPPS: Last one, I swear. On second (or fourth) thought, don't teach Malik to lie. 1) He's cute when he grasps at straws and 2) I'll always be able to tell if he's telling the truth or not. Hehehehe!! (
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MY BISHIE HAS BEEN MORTALLY WOUNDED!!
K, maybe not. But close enough.
I get this call today, from Seto, saying, "Umm.could you come to the hospital?"
I'm like, this is weird..he doesn't know Serenity, does he? So I'm like, "Sure! Are you checking in on Serenity?"
"Who's Serenity? And.erm.it's me."
"Oh.my God! What HAPPENED!?? Are you OK?? What did you DO???? When are you getting out? Is it fatal?? How did this happen?? When did this happen???" I think I just kinda kept spluttering helplessly.
"Calm DOWN!" he interrupted me. "I'm OK. Just come down, OK?"
I swear I have never broken more speeding limits or had more opportunities for speeding tickets in my entire life.
I get to the hospital and Seto is sitting there with an ice pack on his head.
"You made me drive 70 mph and you've only got a bruise on your head?" I was seriously ticked. I had to outrun a cop to get here!!
"I didn't KNOW you'd drive like Daine to get here! Give me pity!! It was a POSSIBLE concussion!"
Deep, calming breaths. In and out. Repeat.
"Ok, fine. So what happened, anyway?"
"Umm.well.you see.*cough *"
"Yes..?"
"I got run over by a semi-truck?"
"Your head..*snicker * ..got run over.. *giggle * ..by a SEMI- TRUCK.*snorts * ..and you escaped with a bruise??!!!" *Peals of laughter *
"Yes?"
"Exactly how bad of a concussion did they say you had?"
"None, actually, but that's not the point, now is it?"
"Um.yeah.would you like to give me a BELIEVABLE excuse now? Preferably one that's TRUE?!?!"
"Well you see.."
He goes into this story where he, Yugi, Malik, and Mokuba were attempting to plan a romatic dinner for us.(How.sweet. He's still lying.) He gave me plans of moonlit walks, bonfires, roses, wonderful things like that. I love my b/f. He's so completely perfect..besides the lying thing..
Apparently they had no Girl Scout cookies to eat, because they could NOT come up with an adequate plan.
Seto jumped into his helicopter, asking everyone to follow him because it's 'easier to think while you're in the sky.'
"And then.Yugi pushed me out of the door."
Still kinda disbelieving. I've met Yugi - he's not the murdering type.
"And you managed this without breaking your neck.how?"
*Mumbles * "It was over a really tall building."
"K, next question - why was the door open?"
"It was too warm?"
"You have an air conditioner!"
"It was broken?"
"You HAVE more than one! Why'd you take the broken one?"
"It broke on the way?"
"You are such a bad liar."
He grins sheepishly at me, "You're too beautiful to lie to."
*Giggles* "I'll forgive you for three reasons. One: That was a perfect response. Two: You are too cute when you try to lie to me, and three: You are GOING to tell me the REAL story NOW!!! Ok? OK!" *Smiling Sweetly*
So he launches into the real story. 'Bout time, too. Apparently, they were planning a romantic date for us. However, they then saw a (oh dear lord help us) monkey. They then began betting who could catch the monkey first. Is this normal behavior? Or is this just some nonunderstandable guy thing?
Seto Yugi and Mokuba took the helicopter and Malik tried on foot. Still pretty normal, right?
Then they discover the monkey hitch hiked on the helicopter. On the runner steppy things of the helicopter, to be precise.
Well, they all tried climbing on the runners WHILE the helicopter is in motion. Smart guys, real smart.
Well, Yugi 'accidentally' pushed Seto (shame to you Yugi! J/K, you're all idiots.) off the helicopter, thank goodness it was over one of those buildings that are like a mini park, so he only fell thru trees and then onto soft grass. But he still managed to land on his head. (Tarzan he is not.)
So apparently Mokuba started to LAUGH at them. So he accidentally let go and fell in the same park, landing unscathed. Leaving Yugi alone in the chopper. Great.
Though Yugi IS crowned the King of Games, he has never flown a helicopter. This is the part where I surrender to the laughter I've been holding back, so Seto had to stop and let me recover before he could continue.
Seto (thankfully) had his headset on and could communicate with Yugi, so he told him how to land. Though, I'm not completely sure he did it of his won free will. He may have left Yugi to his own devices, I believe, if Mokuba hadn't been there.
They lost the monkey for, like, about an hour, never saw Malik, and finally found it again.
On Yugi's head. *Snicker *
Mokuba saw it and did a football tackle on Yugi (how he managed that I will contemplate as soon as I figure out how he won the break dancing contest.) but still lost the monkey.
And he ended with the sheepish, "And Yugi was ran over by a bike and is getting stitches."
*Sigh* "Do you have a phone?" I had to call Crissy. She'd kill me if I didn't tell her that Yugi was injured.
"Here," he hands me a KC pin. "Say the name and it'll dial. Just talk normally." So after a talk with a nearly spazzing Crissy, she rushed down here. I didn't tell her how Yugi got injured, though. I honestly didn't think I could tell the story with out laughing.
"Let's see where that bruise mark is." I began.
"You'll recognize the spot. Look directly where you first hit me with that shoe."
Crap. He still remembers.
Jewel Valentine.
PS: WHY is my b/f incapable of lying to me properly? Not that I'm questioning it or anything, but come on!!
PPS: Where did he get the idea of a SEMI-TRUCK??
PPS: Why do boys isist on being dorks? Why would you decide, 'Hey, let's chase after that monkey!; Is this their idea of a new sport?
PPPS: Is it normal for b/f's to look cuter when they're lying?
PPPPS: Why do I have so many PS's? I could have fit this in before my signature! Oh well. And I WILL go out and duel tomorrow, I swear it!!
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