-sniff- Sorry for the whole inconvenience for the last chapter as it was
pretty nasty. -walks off wondering what I have to do around here to get an
audience- well anyways.I will start off this chapter..a bit different? I
guess..?
~*~*~
Toast felt a light kick in her ribs, as she realized it was all a dream. All of it had become fake a little before Bottle defeated the giant lamp, as she was knocked out by a flying spoon. She looked at her hand also realizing, that her second hand was still stuck in Jack's stomach. The night had just set upon them, turning Jack into a skeleton, releasing Toast's hand.
"Get up already will you?!" Bottle said.
Kiwi tossed her a mirror. "Look at yourself."
Toast did look at herself, as a happy joy became upon her. Apparently the only part from her dream that was true was that her appearance had changed. She felt joyous, as she bid upon her new look.
"You began to change last night." Isilwen said.
"Ohh good cheese!" Toast said, as she was happy her sexiness was still there.
"Did someone say cheese?!" Bottle asked excitedly.
"I did, but that's my new word."
"I thought it was bink." He pointed out.
"That too." She said.
"Well anyfoo-" Kiwi began.
"THAT'S MY WORD!!" Toast screamed out.
"I thought it was bink! And Cheese."
"No, Cheese is my word when im mad, other times its Bottle's. Bink! I just say anytime I want to, and I say anyfoo instead of anyhow, anyway, anywho.so umm.err.yeah."
"Well, alright then, anyways, we need to cross the bridge of kazaa doom or whatever." Kiwi said.
"I thought it was khazad dum..kazaa is an illegal pirating system that I use." Toast said.
"Pirate?!" Jack asked popping in.
"Ohh don't worry Jackiepoo.im your pirate." Toast said, smiling.
Pippin's face grew angry.
Jack smiled happily and boastfully.
There was a mysterious girl who began running towards them with her arms open.
"SARAH!!" Toast said running towards her as she ran towards them.
Sarah passed her and ran towards to Jack, hugging him tight fully, as his face then began turning blue. "Hewwo Wuv." She said, still hugging him.
"SARAH YOUR KILLING HIM!" Bottle and Toast screamed.
Sarah let him go then began planting kisses all over him.
"B*tch! Get away from my Depp!" Toast yelled.
Tara just randomly poofed up and said, "NO CUSSING!" then poofed away.
"Mmmkay.now." Toast said pulling her away. She took out her fist, about to punch her in the stomach, but before she did, she shook her head. "naw, bad idea." She then slapped Sarah across the shoulders.
Sara then began giggling. "I have Johnny particles on me!" she said.
"Well I do too, but I also have some in tape." She said, then pulled out folded tape with the words 'Johnny Particles' on it.
Legolas flinched as he saw the tape.
"Where'd you get those from?" Sara, Kiwi, Isilwen and Bottle asked.
"Tara. She rode in a limo that Johnny Depp had used earlier that week so she had dead Johnny skin particles on her, so she gave me some!" Toast said, smiling.
"Ohh well, gotta run! My story is waiting for me. Readers, read Trouble in Middle Earth: Fellowship of the ring, by pen name hellooo2." Sarah said.
"Dude, no one reads this." Toast said.
"Well I do! And anyone else who does, im advertising my story so hmph!" she said, sticking out her tongue.
Sarah began running off, but stopped, turning around. "Ohh, by the way, Aragorn, you're a woman!" She said.
"Im offended!" Toast said.
"Well so am I." Aragorn said.
"Shut up chicka!" Toast said, to him then turned back to Sarah.
"Ill see you at school Toast!" she said, then ran off, transforming into a pink fuzzy bunny and hopping away into the distance where she just disappeared.
Drums began being heard. "Ohh my god! Its...the evil lamps!" Toast yelped.
"No, they are orcs!" Gandalf yelled.
"NO THEY ARE LAMPS WHETHER U LIKE IT OR NOT Mr. I KNOW EVERYTHING!!!"
A single lamp came walking down with spoons in its hand.
"WHO'S THE WIZARD NOW?!" Toast yelled out.
Gandalf knocked the side of its head with his staff, and knocked off a mascot helmet revealing an orc underneath it. "Me." He said.
"I still think it's a lamp." She said, not wanting to admit she was wrong.
More herds of the orcs dressed as lamps swarmed in, but were soon scattered away.
There was a long pause.
"OHH MY GOD!!!" Toast screamed out.
"Ohh god." Bottle said rolling his eyes.
"Balrog." Isilwen mumbled.
"It's the Balrog!!" Kiwi yelled.
"MOMMIE CAN I HAVE THE BALROG?!" Toast yelled out.
"NO!" came a faint voice from the air sounding like Toast's mom. "And don't forget to change your underwear!!"
"Ohh my god." Toast mumbled, embarrassed.
"RUN!" Gandalf yelled.
"Why?! The Balrog is hot!!" Toast yelled.
"Exactly!" Said Aragorn.
"Ohh my goodness, you are a woman!!" Kiwi said.
"Why am I a woman?" asked Aragorn.
"Because you just said the Balrog was hot!!" Bottle said.
"Well it is!" He shouted as they began running.
"I think he means its because its made out of fire." Isilwen said.
"Well how else could it be hot?" he asked.
"BECAUSE IT LOOKS.SEXY!!" Toast yelled, just walking behind.
Aragorn's eyes widened in disgust.
Bottle and Kiwi and Isilwen grabbed Toast's arms dragging her to the bridge of khazad dum.
They all began jumping.
Legolas was about to toss Gimli.
"No one tosses a Dwarf!" he yelled.
Legolas jumped before him, followed by Gimli who almost falls.
Legolas grabs his beard.
"NOT THE BEARD!!" he yelled.
"You can make a wig out of that with just one little snip." Isilwen said.
After them, the only ones left were Aragorn, Frodo and Toast.
"Lean forward!" Aragorn yelled.
"NO! Its: You put your right foot in, you put your right foot out, you put your right foot in and shake it all about. You do the hokey pokey and turn yourself around, and that's what its all about!" Toast said, and they began doing so. They made it to the other side, then the bridge broke and fell down.
They all ran past Gandalf.
"YOU SHALL NOT PASS!!" he began yelling at the Balrog.
Pippin was standing by Bottle, and as Bottle tried running off, Pippin tripped him, causing him to fall down. He grabbed onto Kiwi for support, but they began falling.
"AWW DAMIT!" Toast yelled watching them fall. "THAT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE GANDALF!!"
The fellowship all flinched, including Gandalf.
"Did I say that out loud?" she asked.
Everyone nodded.
The Balrog began falling, as the bridge was crumbling underneath it.
"NOT YOU TOO!!" Toast yelled in horror.
Isilwen ran in front of Gandalf as she was playing a game with Merry.
The whip from the Balrog hit Isilwen, bringing her down.
"What the.!" she yelled as she soon caught up with the other two.
Toast noticed a pink fuzzy bunny hopping towards her, that soon turned into Sarah.
"Would you like the honors?" Toast asked her.
"Only if you don't mind." She said.
"Why don't we both?" Toast said.
They both took a step forward and shoved Gandalf off the cliff.
"That took care of 'em." Toast said.
"See yah at school!" Sarah said then turned back into a pink fuzzy bunny and hopped away.
"I want my Balrog back. Parlet, go get him for me." Toast said, then pushing him off the cliff. "WRONG WAY!!" she yelled, then jumped after it herself.
She soon caught up with Bottle, Kiwi, Isilwen, and Parlet as Gandalf and the Balrog went their own way.
"You know, this fall never ends. It just keeps on going, like the energizer battery. You know that little bunny with the drum," Kiwi began, "It just keeps on going, and going, and going, and going, and going, and going, and going, and going and going."
Toast soon joined in, "And going, and going, and going, and going, and going, and going, and going, and going, and going."
As so did Isilwen, "And going, and going, and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going."
~*~*~
Ten Minutes
Later ~*~*~
"And going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going-"
"SHUT UP!" Bottle screamed.
"IT gets annoying!!" Yelled Parlet.
"Its like acid," Toast began. "Kinda like me, I just keep on burningandburningandburningandburningandburningandburningandburningandburnin gandburningandburning-"
"We get the point." Said Parlet.
"Well either way, I just keep burningandburningandburningandburning until I get tired."
After a bit of quietness, they all hit a hard wood floor.
"OOF!" Said Kiwi.
"OOG!" Said Isilwen.
"GAH!" Said Parlet.
"GAH GAH!" Said Parlet, two more times. "GET OFF ME!" he yelped.
"Sorry dude, but im comfy. Bottle, your comfy." Toast said, as she looked down and noticed she was on both Parlet and Bottle, and Isilwen and Kiwi were off to the side.
"Dude! This is YOUR house!" Toast said.
"I know." Bottle replied.
Toast got up and got off of Bottle. Bottle got up and got off of Parlet. As Parlet tried getting up, he was then crushed again by Jack.
"GAH!" Parlet screamed.
"Ohh hello luv!" Said Jack as he got up.
Toast giggled a bit. "Ohh 'ello luv!" She said back to him.
Parlet tried getting up, but again, was pushed down, by what looked to be as air.
"Stop playing around Parlet, and get up!" Kiwi said.
Isilwen watched amused.
"I.cant.something.someone.is on me.." He said.
"'Ello my freaky darlings!" Came a voice from what seemed coming from no where.
"SKINNER!!!!" Toast yelled jumping up and down. "My husbands here, my husbands here, my husbands here!! Luv, put your clothes on."
"Sorry." He said, as the invisible man got up from Parlet, putting on a coat, a hat, sunglasses, boots, gloves and grease paint.
Toast ran over to him. "LOVE!!! LOVE!!" She said as she hugged him tightly. "I LOVE YOU!!!!" she then began shrieking. "EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!"
~*~*~
Toast felt a light kick in her ribs, as she realized it was all a dream. All of it had become fake a little before Bottle defeated the giant lamp, as she was knocked out by a flying spoon. She looked at her hand also realizing, that her second hand was still stuck in Jack's stomach. The night had just set upon them, turning Jack into a skeleton, releasing Toast's hand.
"Get up already will you?!" Bottle said.
Kiwi tossed her a mirror. "Look at yourself."
Toast did look at herself, as a happy joy became upon her. Apparently the only part from her dream that was true was that her appearance had changed. She felt joyous, as she bid upon her new look.
"You began to change last night." Isilwen said.
"Ohh good cheese!" Toast said, as she was happy her sexiness was still there.
"Did someone say cheese?!" Bottle asked excitedly.
"I did, but that's my new word."
"I thought it was bink." He pointed out.
"That too." She said.
"Well anyfoo-" Kiwi began.
"THAT'S MY WORD!!" Toast screamed out.
"I thought it was bink! And Cheese."
"No, Cheese is my word when im mad, other times its Bottle's. Bink! I just say anytime I want to, and I say anyfoo instead of anyhow, anyway, anywho.so umm.err.yeah."
"Well, alright then, anyways, we need to cross the bridge of kazaa doom or whatever." Kiwi said.
"I thought it was khazad dum..kazaa is an illegal pirating system that I use." Toast said.
"Pirate?!" Jack asked popping in.
"Ohh don't worry Jackiepoo.im your pirate." Toast said, smiling.
Pippin's face grew angry.
Jack smiled happily and boastfully.
There was a mysterious girl who began running towards them with her arms open.
"SARAH!!" Toast said running towards her as she ran towards them.
Sarah passed her and ran towards to Jack, hugging him tight fully, as his face then began turning blue. "Hewwo Wuv." She said, still hugging him.
"SARAH YOUR KILLING HIM!" Bottle and Toast screamed.
Sarah let him go then began planting kisses all over him.
"B*tch! Get away from my Depp!" Toast yelled.
Tara just randomly poofed up and said, "NO CUSSING!" then poofed away.
"Mmmkay.now." Toast said pulling her away. She took out her fist, about to punch her in the stomach, but before she did, she shook her head. "naw, bad idea." She then slapped Sarah across the shoulders.
Sara then began giggling. "I have Johnny particles on me!" she said.
"Well I do too, but I also have some in tape." She said, then pulled out folded tape with the words 'Johnny Particles' on it.
Legolas flinched as he saw the tape.
"Where'd you get those from?" Sara, Kiwi, Isilwen and Bottle asked.
"Tara. She rode in a limo that Johnny Depp had used earlier that week so she had dead Johnny skin particles on her, so she gave me some!" Toast said, smiling.
"Ohh well, gotta run! My story is waiting for me. Readers, read Trouble in Middle Earth: Fellowship of the ring, by pen name hellooo2." Sarah said.
"Dude, no one reads this." Toast said.
"Well I do! And anyone else who does, im advertising my story so hmph!" she said, sticking out her tongue.
Sarah began running off, but stopped, turning around. "Ohh, by the way, Aragorn, you're a woman!" She said.
"Im offended!" Toast said.
"Well so am I." Aragorn said.
"Shut up chicka!" Toast said, to him then turned back to Sarah.
"Ill see you at school Toast!" she said, then ran off, transforming into a pink fuzzy bunny and hopping away into the distance where she just disappeared.
Drums began being heard. "Ohh my god! Its...the evil lamps!" Toast yelped.
"No, they are orcs!" Gandalf yelled.
"NO THEY ARE LAMPS WHETHER U LIKE IT OR NOT Mr. I KNOW EVERYTHING!!!"
A single lamp came walking down with spoons in its hand.
"WHO'S THE WIZARD NOW?!" Toast yelled out.
Gandalf knocked the side of its head with his staff, and knocked off a mascot helmet revealing an orc underneath it. "Me." He said.
"I still think it's a lamp." She said, not wanting to admit she was wrong.
More herds of the orcs dressed as lamps swarmed in, but were soon scattered away.
There was a long pause.
"OHH MY GOD!!!" Toast screamed out.
"Ohh god." Bottle said rolling his eyes.
"Balrog." Isilwen mumbled.
"It's the Balrog!!" Kiwi yelled.
"MOMMIE CAN I HAVE THE BALROG?!" Toast yelled out.
"NO!" came a faint voice from the air sounding like Toast's mom. "And don't forget to change your underwear!!"
"Ohh my god." Toast mumbled, embarrassed.
"RUN!" Gandalf yelled.
"Why?! The Balrog is hot!!" Toast yelled.
"Exactly!" Said Aragorn.
"Ohh my goodness, you are a woman!!" Kiwi said.
"Why am I a woman?" asked Aragorn.
"Because you just said the Balrog was hot!!" Bottle said.
"Well it is!" He shouted as they began running.
"I think he means its because its made out of fire." Isilwen said.
"Well how else could it be hot?" he asked.
"BECAUSE IT LOOKS.SEXY!!" Toast yelled, just walking behind.
Aragorn's eyes widened in disgust.
Bottle and Kiwi and Isilwen grabbed Toast's arms dragging her to the bridge of khazad dum.
They all began jumping.
Legolas was about to toss Gimli.
"No one tosses a Dwarf!" he yelled.
Legolas jumped before him, followed by Gimli who almost falls.
Legolas grabs his beard.
"NOT THE BEARD!!" he yelled.
"You can make a wig out of that with just one little snip." Isilwen said.
After them, the only ones left were Aragorn, Frodo and Toast.
"Lean forward!" Aragorn yelled.
"NO! Its: You put your right foot in, you put your right foot out, you put your right foot in and shake it all about. You do the hokey pokey and turn yourself around, and that's what its all about!" Toast said, and they began doing so. They made it to the other side, then the bridge broke and fell down.
They all ran past Gandalf.
"YOU SHALL NOT PASS!!" he began yelling at the Balrog.
Pippin was standing by Bottle, and as Bottle tried running off, Pippin tripped him, causing him to fall down. He grabbed onto Kiwi for support, but they began falling.
"AWW DAMIT!" Toast yelled watching them fall. "THAT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE GANDALF!!"
The fellowship all flinched, including Gandalf.
"Did I say that out loud?" she asked.
Everyone nodded.
The Balrog began falling, as the bridge was crumbling underneath it.
"NOT YOU TOO!!" Toast yelled in horror.
Isilwen ran in front of Gandalf as she was playing a game with Merry.
The whip from the Balrog hit Isilwen, bringing her down.
"What the.!" she yelled as she soon caught up with the other two.
Toast noticed a pink fuzzy bunny hopping towards her, that soon turned into Sarah.
"Would you like the honors?" Toast asked her.
"Only if you don't mind." She said.
"Why don't we both?" Toast said.
They both took a step forward and shoved Gandalf off the cliff.
"That took care of 'em." Toast said.
"See yah at school!" Sarah said then turned back into a pink fuzzy bunny and hopped away.
"I want my Balrog back. Parlet, go get him for me." Toast said, then pushing him off the cliff. "WRONG WAY!!" she yelled, then jumped after it herself.
She soon caught up with Bottle, Kiwi, Isilwen, and Parlet as Gandalf and the Balrog went their own way.
"You know, this fall never ends. It just keeps on going, like the energizer battery. You know that little bunny with the drum," Kiwi began, "It just keeps on going, and going, and going, and going, and going, and going, and going, and going and going."
Toast soon joined in, "And going, and going, and going, and going, and going, and going, and going, and going, and going."
As so did Isilwen, "And going, and going, and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going."
~*~*~
Ten Minutes
Later ~*~*~
"And going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going-"
"SHUT UP!" Bottle screamed.
"IT gets annoying!!" Yelled Parlet.
"Its like acid," Toast began. "Kinda like me, I just keep on burningandburningandburningandburningandburningandburningandburningandburnin gandburningandburning-"
"We get the point." Said Parlet.
"Well either way, I just keep burningandburningandburningandburning until I get tired."
After a bit of quietness, they all hit a hard wood floor.
"OOF!" Said Kiwi.
"OOG!" Said Isilwen.
"GAH!" Said Parlet.
"GAH GAH!" Said Parlet, two more times. "GET OFF ME!" he yelped.
"Sorry dude, but im comfy. Bottle, your comfy." Toast said, as she looked down and noticed she was on both Parlet and Bottle, and Isilwen and Kiwi were off to the side.
"Dude! This is YOUR house!" Toast said.
"I know." Bottle replied.
Toast got up and got off of Bottle. Bottle got up and got off of Parlet. As Parlet tried getting up, he was then crushed again by Jack.
"GAH!" Parlet screamed.
"Ohh hello luv!" Said Jack as he got up.
Toast giggled a bit. "Ohh 'ello luv!" She said back to him.
Parlet tried getting up, but again, was pushed down, by what looked to be as air.
"Stop playing around Parlet, and get up!" Kiwi said.
Isilwen watched amused.
"I.cant.something.someone.is on me.." He said.
"'Ello my freaky darlings!" Came a voice from what seemed coming from no where.
"SKINNER!!!!" Toast yelled jumping up and down. "My husbands here, my husbands here, my husbands here!! Luv, put your clothes on."
"Sorry." He said, as the invisible man got up from Parlet, putting on a coat, a hat, sunglasses, boots, gloves and grease paint.
Toast ran over to him. "LOVE!!! LOVE!!" She said as she hugged him tightly. "I LOVE YOU!!!!" she then began shrieking. "EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!"