~*~Disclaimer=Me no own!~*~ Totally lovin' you guys for all the reviews!!!
But I wanna try and get more reviews so if you want more at least five
people are gonna have to review this chapter ok? (I'm either mean or
delusional don't know which! ( ) Oh n that saying you know the one that
went 'Sometimes life is like bashing your head against a brick wall-'cept
the wall makes more sense' I thought of that during an RE lesson-Don't ask-
my Bessie mate thought it was funny though, so Big grin.~*~
'Lucky, the doctors said he was lucky. His father had lied yet again, he'd told the doctors that he'd found him lying out near the beach beaten to a pulp-he'd forgotten the important little details like he was the one who'd done the beating. Just another skeleton to add to the secret closet in his memory, just another incident to be forever blocked, just another barrier added to his collection.'
Malcolm awoke but didn't open his eyes, he knew the monitor behind him would reveal he was no longer asleep but he didn't care. He searched his memory again, now realising he could remember specific events, like being in shuttlepod one with Trip, when they both nearly died of hypothermia. He felt elated at this realisation, but his happiness was short lived when he discovered the only other things he could remember were horrific incidents of abuse in his past.
"Mornin' Mal" said a voice cheerily.
'Trip' He thought blearily 'Only he could sound so bloody cheerful'
He opened his eyes. "Hello Trip" he said monotone.
"How're ya feelin'?" Trip asked "'cause ya scared the hell outta the Cap'n 'n' the doc yesterday"
'Scared myself too' Malcolm thought, remembering the sudden influx of images racing through his tired mind 'Hurt like hell!'
"I'm ok" he replied politely.
"Ya gonna tell me what's wrong?" Trip pressed
'Wow, these people must've been in the bog when tact was being handed out" Malcolm thought annoyed.
"Erm." he pretended to think "No"
"Mal! C'mon, I'm ya best mate if ya can't tell me who can you tell?" Trip asked looking slightly hurt.
"If it makes you feel any better I remember when we were stuck in shuttlepod one after we thought Enterprise had been destroyed." Malcolm offered.
Trip grinned. "That's great Mal!" He exclaimed "Remembering anythin' else?"
Malcolm shook his head.
'What I really need is someone who understands' he thought miserably 'The happy patrol aren't being the greatest help, they mean well but sometimes I would prefer to tell them in my own time at my own pace!'
"Trip, if you don't mind I'd like to get some sleep now" said Malcolm "I've got a headache like you wouldn't believe, my ankles throbbing, my ribs hurt and I might end up saying something I regret later on"
"Sure Mal" replied Trip in monotone "Ya know where I am if ya wanna talk"
'Well no I don't, but thanks all the same' Malcolm thought gratefully.
He rummaged through his mind to find what could be called 'a happy memory', his thoughts settled on a black haired, green eyed girl with a broad Yorkshire accent. She struck a cord deep within him but he couldn't for the life of him think why.
Eventually he gave up and dropped back off to sleep.
'He opened his eyes,
"'Bout time you woke up-or should I say fell asleep" said a voice.
The speaker moved into his line of vision-she had black hair, green eyes and a broad Yorkshire accent. Only this time she seemed in her mid- twenties.
"Hannah?" he asked.
"Yup, glad to see you remember me at least" she joked sitting down beside him.
"Er.what're you doing here?" He asked confused
"Don't ask me! It's your imagination! I'm just here for the ride mate" she replied throwing her hands up "a figment of your mind, I'm here because you want me to be here."
He stared at her even more confused. She sighed and stood up.
"This," she announced throwing her arms out. "Is your sub-conscious! You, are here because you want answers-I have them"
"How?" He asked amazed
"I'm the key to your memories." she told him "You created me out of your mind"
"So you're not real?" he asked bewildered
"I'm based on one of your best friends you nutcase!" she exclaimed "But in here, I'm not real no. As I said your subconscious thoughts must've decided that you wanted to know what you've lost-confused yet? I am and I know what's going on!"
"Start again-speak slowly" Malcolm said
"Oh f'cryin' out loud boy! Just trust me, kay? Like you used to" she said annoyed.
"Hang on if I created you I can make you go away and then I can wake up" Said Malcolm "This place is screwy and I'm so gone!"
She stared at him. "Of course this place is screwy!" She exploded "It's you beneath the rigid control and rules!"
Malcolm merely stared at her. "If I created you in my sub-conscious like you said then why didn't I choose someone like Trip?" He asked smugly.
She grinned. "Remember this?" she asked. "The day I ever act like Amy, I'll have a fleecy coat and a tail!"
Malcolm's mouth dropped open. "I do" He whispered "You said it in the playground at school the second time we met. What were you thinking?!"
Hannah sighed. "Malcolm, currently I'm a figment of you're imagination-I'm not the real Hannah Tarry, I'm just how you remember her"
Malcolm nodded "You'd think I'd understand this better seeing as this is my mind" he said smiling a little.
She looked sad for a second. "Mal, you've hidden so many things away from the people who care about you it's all built up inside-I'm surprised you haven't exploded! You were so determined not to be the victim-you wanted to be the survivor, not pitied, you never understood that if you just got everything off your chest you'd feel a lot better."
"I'm going to wake up now, I don't understand any of this, and I don't fully remember you." Malcolm snapped.
"Ok but before you go, there's a letter from me on your desk-you never know it may jump-start your memory" she said finally.'
Malcolm woke up, feeling incredibly confused. "I've got to stop sleepin'" he moaned "My imaginations more loopy than reality."
He turned to one of the guards. "Can you contact Commander Tucker and ask him if he can go to my quarters and fetch me the letter on my desk" he said.
'Right, you're taking advice from some bird you met in your subconscious' he thought 'Well at least they can cart you off to the nut house when you're well.'
Twenty minutes later Trip entered sickbay and handed him the letter.
"I guess this means you're rememberin' stuff" Trip said grinning.
"Yup" Malcolm replied absentmindedly "A girl I met in my sub conscious told me she'd sent me a letter and that it was on my desk"
"Mal, ya feelin' alright?" Trip asked
"Absolutely fine and dandy" Malcolm replied smiling "Just cracking up"
Trip looked worried, Malcolm normally seemed so.together, and this eerie calmness was worrying him slightly.
An orange beam appeared in the room, the security staff caught unawares were taken down in seconds. Then the assailant turned and shot Trip and Doctor Phlox (Who had just come out from feeding his animals).
"Excuse me a moment while I see to it we are left alone" he said politely crossing the room to the control panel. He made some alterations and then smiled.
"If you're here to kill me do it right this time" Malcolm snapped.
"All in due time, all in due time" he said calmly, slightly taken aback.
"Well so far you've tried twice and failed abysmally, so you could save me a whole lotta time and effort by just setting that security guards phaser to kill and then pointing it at me and firing" Malcolm told him slowly. "Do you think you can handle that?"
"Damn human! I'm gonna make you suffer!"
"Oh woes me" said Malcolm sarcastically "I'm quaking in my hospital gown I assure you."
"Ok! Now I'm pissed!" he said annoyed pointing his weapon in front of Malcolm's face
"Go on, shoot! I dare ya!" Malcolm hissed.
His hand twitched on the trigger.....
~*~Muhahahaha! A evil! But this has to be the longest chapter ever! Anyway, if you want the next chapter at least 5 people must review to see if I'm feeling a bitch and kill Malcolm off-or if Trips dead come to think of it- no one knows what setting the gun was on do they? Heh heh heh! ~*~"Ok! Now I'm pissed!" he said annoyed
'Lucky, the doctors said he was lucky. His father had lied yet again, he'd told the doctors that he'd found him lying out near the beach beaten to a pulp-he'd forgotten the important little details like he was the one who'd done the beating. Just another skeleton to add to the secret closet in his memory, just another incident to be forever blocked, just another barrier added to his collection.'
Malcolm awoke but didn't open his eyes, he knew the monitor behind him would reveal he was no longer asleep but he didn't care. He searched his memory again, now realising he could remember specific events, like being in shuttlepod one with Trip, when they both nearly died of hypothermia. He felt elated at this realisation, but his happiness was short lived when he discovered the only other things he could remember were horrific incidents of abuse in his past.
"Mornin' Mal" said a voice cheerily.
'Trip' He thought blearily 'Only he could sound so bloody cheerful'
He opened his eyes. "Hello Trip" he said monotone.
"How're ya feelin'?" Trip asked "'cause ya scared the hell outta the Cap'n 'n' the doc yesterday"
'Scared myself too' Malcolm thought, remembering the sudden influx of images racing through his tired mind 'Hurt like hell!'
"I'm ok" he replied politely.
"Ya gonna tell me what's wrong?" Trip pressed
'Wow, these people must've been in the bog when tact was being handed out" Malcolm thought annoyed.
"Erm." he pretended to think "No"
"Mal! C'mon, I'm ya best mate if ya can't tell me who can you tell?" Trip asked looking slightly hurt.
"If it makes you feel any better I remember when we were stuck in shuttlepod one after we thought Enterprise had been destroyed." Malcolm offered.
Trip grinned. "That's great Mal!" He exclaimed "Remembering anythin' else?"
Malcolm shook his head.
'What I really need is someone who understands' he thought miserably 'The happy patrol aren't being the greatest help, they mean well but sometimes I would prefer to tell them in my own time at my own pace!'
"Trip, if you don't mind I'd like to get some sleep now" said Malcolm "I've got a headache like you wouldn't believe, my ankles throbbing, my ribs hurt and I might end up saying something I regret later on"
"Sure Mal" replied Trip in monotone "Ya know where I am if ya wanna talk"
'Well no I don't, but thanks all the same' Malcolm thought gratefully.
He rummaged through his mind to find what could be called 'a happy memory', his thoughts settled on a black haired, green eyed girl with a broad Yorkshire accent. She struck a cord deep within him but he couldn't for the life of him think why.
Eventually he gave up and dropped back off to sleep.
'He opened his eyes,
"'Bout time you woke up-or should I say fell asleep" said a voice.
The speaker moved into his line of vision-she had black hair, green eyes and a broad Yorkshire accent. Only this time she seemed in her mid- twenties.
"Hannah?" he asked.
"Yup, glad to see you remember me at least" she joked sitting down beside him.
"Er.what're you doing here?" He asked confused
"Don't ask me! It's your imagination! I'm just here for the ride mate" she replied throwing her hands up "a figment of your mind, I'm here because you want me to be here."
He stared at her even more confused. She sighed and stood up.
"This," she announced throwing her arms out. "Is your sub-conscious! You, are here because you want answers-I have them"
"How?" He asked amazed
"I'm the key to your memories." she told him "You created me out of your mind"
"So you're not real?" he asked bewildered
"I'm based on one of your best friends you nutcase!" she exclaimed "But in here, I'm not real no. As I said your subconscious thoughts must've decided that you wanted to know what you've lost-confused yet? I am and I know what's going on!"
"Start again-speak slowly" Malcolm said
"Oh f'cryin' out loud boy! Just trust me, kay? Like you used to" she said annoyed.
"Hang on if I created you I can make you go away and then I can wake up" Said Malcolm "This place is screwy and I'm so gone!"
She stared at him. "Of course this place is screwy!" She exploded "It's you beneath the rigid control and rules!"
Malcolm merely stared at her. "If I created you in my sub-conscious like you said then why didn't I choose someone like Trip?" He asked smugly.
She grinned. "Remember this?" she asked. "The day I ever act like Amy, I'll have a fleecy coat and a tail!"
Malcolm's mouth dropped open. "I do" He whispered "You said it in the playground at school the second time we met. What were you thinking?!"
Hannah sighed. "Malcolm, currently I'm a figment of you're imagination-I'm not the real Hannah Tarry, I'm just how you remember her"
Malcolm nodded "You'd think I'd understand this better seeing as this is my mind" he said smiling a little.
She looked sad for a second. "Mal, you've hidden so many things away from the people who care about you it's all built up inside-I'm surprised you haven't exploded! You were so determined not to be the victim-you wanted to be the survivor, not pitied, you never understood that if you just got everything off your chest you'd feel a lot better."
"I'm going to wake up now, I don't understand any of this, and I don't fully remember you." Malcolm snapped.
"Ok but before you go, there's a letter from me on your desk-you never know it may jump-start your memory" she said finally.'
Malcolm woke up, feeling incredibly confused. "I've got to stop sleepin'" he moaned "My imaginations more loopy than reality."
He turned to one of the guards. "Can you contact Commander Tucker and ask him if he can go to my quarters and fetch me the letter on my desk" he said.
'Right, you're taking advice from some bird you met in your subconscious' he thought 'Well at least they can cart you off to the nut house when you're well.'
Twenty minutes later Trip entered sickbay and handed him the letter.
"I guess this means you're rememberin' stuff" Trip said grinning.
"Yup" Malcolm replied absentmindedly "A girl I met in my sub conscious told me she'd sent me a letter and that it was on my desk"
"Mal, ya feelin' alright?" Trip asked
"Absolutely fine and dandy" Malcolm replied smiling "Just cracking up"
Trip looked worried, Malcolm normally seemed so.together, and this eerie calmness was worrying him slightly.
An orange beam appeared in the room, the security staff caught unawares were taken down in seconds. Then the assailant turned and shot Trip and Doctor Phlox (Who had just come out from feeding his animals).
"Excuse me a moment while I see to it we are left alone" he said politely crossing the room to the control panel. He made some alterations and then smiled.
"If you're here to kill me do it right this time" Malcolm snapped.
"All in due time, all in due time" he said calmly, slightly taken aback.
"Well so far you've tried twice and failed abysmally, so you could save me a whole lotta time and effort by just setting that security guards phaser to kill and then pointing it at me and firing" Malcolm told him slowly. "Do you think you can handle that?"
"Damn human! I'm gonna make you suffer!"
"Oh woes me" said Malcolm sarcastically "I'm quaking in my hospital gown I assure you."
"Ok! Now I'm pissed!" he said annoyed pointing his weapon in front of Malcolm's face
"Go on, shoot! I dare ya!" Malcolm hissed.
His hand twitched on the trigger.....
~*~Muhahahaha! A evil! But this has to be the longest chapter ever! Anyway, if you want the next chapter at least 5 people must review to see if I'm feeling a bitch and kill Malcolm off-or if Trips dead come to think of it- no one knows what setting the gun was on do they? Heh heh heh! ~*~"Ok! Now I'm pissed!" he said annoyed