Hello! To all da ppl that reviewed! Hehe well um.sum were nice.sum
were..eheh not dat nice! But oh well ill take all da advice that u ppl give
so im open to all criticisms! Hehe and yeah this piece was done using a
diff technique! I hope u can tell by reading! Eheh?...well thx again read
on. =P
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Subaru found himself lying on a white sheeted bed. Alone in the dark his eyes trailed around the room engulfed in darkness slowly looking at the displays of ornaments and antiques on the dressing table coated with dust to the tiny cracks on the blinded window sill. Listening to the silence of the room and the individual ticks of the expired brown clock on the bedside table Subaru spread his fingers gently on the bed sheet feeling the soft material as he swept across it. He watched calmly as he shaped the bed creases with every movement of his slender fingers. It was then when the white wooden door across the room gave a loud squeak and opened gushing in new light which illuminated half the room. Subaru who was dressed in his normal way, black satin shirt with white pants following the white trench coat that had hung above his shoulder for as far as he could remember, felt the need to get into a more comfortable position now that somebody had come. On his side with his elbow holding his weight, he watched with slight concern to whom the person was. As the person stepped into the light slowly the light revealed black. Black shoes with undone shoe laces being dragged on the floor, black pants and a trench coast similar to his but not. Wanting to sit up he was interrupted abruptly.
'Its okay you can stay like that.'
Despite hearing the mans words he moved to get up pushing his elbow against the bed to help him. Something told him that he was uncomfortable or a better word vulnerable. However before he could get up to secure his position he felt both his thin wrists being cuffed tightly and pushed roughly against the bed thrusting him down with considerable pressure which he did not expect. Slowly he felt his heart beats pace quickening. Looking through his bangs that were over his eyes he caught sight of the man who was now over him. Subaru desperately applied pressure to get his hands free but was in vain. The room had suddenly been engorged by silence. All he could hear was the breathing of the man. The clock tickings had drained into the surroundings.
'Lets continue where we left of shall we Subaru? My Subaru?'
Before giving Subaru any time to think, the man started tasting his neck as though tasting an ice-cream slowly giving him love bites on his neck slowly making his way down towards Subaru's chest. Subaru instinctively tilted his head to the other direction. Something in him told him not to fight, told him to go with the flow but together with it was something, someone that reminded him that this isn't the real him.
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With a sharp breath Subaru awoke from the nightmare. Panting he studied his surroundings. Once again he found himself alone in a room just like his dream before but instead of darkness there was light. Instead of silence there were birds singing coming from the open window which had pale green curtains that gently fluttered with the cool breezed that blew in and out of the room. Subaru still lost and confused found the surroundings nearly similar to that in his dream. There were ornaments and antiques that did resemble those in his dream but he couldn't make sure. That didn't really bother him as much as the fact that he realized that he did not have a clear memory of the events that had happened. All he remembered was tiny scattered bits and fragments of memory that didn't complete the jigsaw puzzle. All he knew was that he was injured pretty badly and somebody took the trouble to fix him up. Every movement he made caused him pain. Bringing his hand to his temples, and he started massaging them in a rotary motion to ease the head aches After that he let his hands slip down to his neck attempting to warm them using the warmness of his neck when he felt marks on his neck. The dream was true. It did happen but what happen after that? Before that he didn't know. Straining and straining was of no good and had only made the head ache aggravate. Finally having no choice he gave up, leaning back down on the bed to satisfy his weak body, he buried his face into the soft white pillow. Subaru took a deep long breath and it was then when he realized a smell. A very very familiar yet distant smell from his clouded memories. Subaru let his mind drain into his memories searching for this smell which he knew held some importance to him. Searching and searching he remembered everyday after work returning home there would be this smell. Hokuto would be there and.him as well. In the instant of realizing that he sprang out of bed peering around quickly to see if Seishirou was anywhere in sight. It was now an obvious fact that he was in Seishirou's place. He started remembering all that happened after he pierced Seishirou which broke the spell but what happened before that he still didn't know. Still dizzy, Subaru forced himself out of bed, he felt the strong urge to find him. The thought of what to do when he faced Seishirou didn't even occur to him at this point. All he cared about was to see him and that would be enough. Just to see him. Helping himself with the support of the walls, Subaru pushed the glass door panel and wandered outside into the vast garden that spread as far as his eyes could see.
Once outside he let the winds past him by blowing his clothes, hair and anything loose to the direction of the wind. What surrounded him was a garden so beautiful that he would have called it Eden himself. 'Is this a dream?' he thought to himself. He knew that there was no such a place as this in Tokyo and his instincts told him that this is against reality. This was something else but there was no fear in his mind and heart just pain that has been there since that day years ago. Subaru made up his mind that no matter what this place is if Seishirou was here, then it was alright. Taking a few paces forward, it started showering lightly with Sakura petals. As if responding to scar behind Subaru's hands, one petal landed on the palm of his hand but all Subaru did was release it into the wind. After all he as already bound by the Sakura many many many years back and for eternity.
Under the huge Sakura tree, Subaru paused. The winds were starting to chill his skin sending countless chills down his spine reminding him of the pains of his life. There Subaru held on to his shoulders, eyes layered with tears, sunk his fingers into his trench coat trying to suppress the sadness of the recollecting memories that replayed as the Sakura fell. They reminded him of everything. Not that he had forgotten. He never had, never could. At this point he felt his own weakness. The penalty of having this weak heart was too much.
Fingers still sunk tightly on his trench coat, Subaru noticed something very different. The material that he was use to clutch felt different. Drying his eyes and clearing his sight Subaru looked at the trench coat hanging on his shoulders only to find what he should have noticed way before, it was deep black.
'I see that you have awakened Subaru-kun. But with that body I'm afraid that sooner or later I will have to carry you back into bed' came a voice from above the tree which Subaru was under.
Subaru face couldn't help but blushed slightly before he caught hold of himself again. Deep inside he was glad to see Seishirou again but.the problem was that he was out of words. He couldn't find anything to say. The fact that the thing that was shielding him from the bitter cold was Seishirou's trench coat made him feel ever more uncomfortable. Should he say thanks for saving him? But that wouldn't make any sense. Being in a dilemma of what to say, all Subaru did was look back into Seishirou's amber eyes which told Seishirou what he had already expected.
Finally deciding, Subaru reluctantly said 'Seishirou-san.today I wish to end it all' Subaru's eyes tried to look angry but sorrow was clearly what showed. The dizziness slowly catching up with him Subaru knew that he had a short time left and quickly slipped three ofudas between his fingers. Seishirou still lying on the tree branch up the tree did nothing but looked down amused.
'Seishirou-san I am being serious'
'Oh are you?' Seishirou replied making his way down the tree walking towards Subaru. Subaru feeling his heart beat increased as Seishirou advanced thought to attack him but before he did, Seishirou grabbed his hand gently and lowered it looking into Subaru's now trembling eyes.
'Doing that would have been a big blow to your body Subaru-kun and I cannot accept that.' Seishirou smiled.
Subaru, whose heart was beating in his mind, felt the dizziness gaining over him.
'Subaru-kun.what is it that you want from me?'
At hearing this, Subaru's mind cleared and started to panic. For what was he going to tell Seishirou? The truth? The truth even he didn't want to accept. He couldn't. he couldn't. He realized that this was the question that he had wished never having to answer in his life. But now it stared him right at the face waiting for the answer. 'To kill you..' Subaru lied.
'You were never good at lying Subaru-kun' Seishirou said with a slight laugh and returned to the serious question. Seishirou himself was in no better position than Subaru. If he told the truth, Subaru would know his true feelings towards him. But he wanted to know Subaru's side even if it risked letting everything spill out.
Seishirou lit his cigarette and inhaled it. After having done so he offered the same stick to Subaru who at first looked shocked and reluctant but then received it and slowly brought it to his lips and took a breath of it as well. He needed something to calm him down and a cigarette at this time was a good one. Seishirou just watched on amused.
'Hey Subaru-kun.why didn't you kill me when you had the chance?' Seishirou asked coolly but deep inside he was impatient for the answer. No reply. At the question Subaru tried to avert his eyes but Seishirou's eye burned eagerly into his.
'Don't you want to kill me after what I did to your sister? Isn't that your life's wish?'
All these questions were hitting Subaru's heart on their weak spots one by one.
With every question, Seishirou could tell that Subaru was getting weaker and weaker and that he was going to spill any minute now either that or he was going to pass out. Wanting to press on Seishirou felt that he was starting to lose his cool so he stopped and just looked back filled with eagerness. Subaru now with his head aches pumping into his head was slightly trembling. He no longer was looking at Seishirou he was afraid that through his eyes the truth would be exposed. Silence was what followed dreadful silence that seemed to Subaru as a long eternity but was in reality just a few clock ticks. Subaru found himself sweating not from heat or anything of that sort and his head rocking slowly forward and backwards. He was slowly losing his balance and even his heart beat was now causing the head ache to aggravate further. It was then that his legs gave way sending the rest of his body towards to ground. But what he landed on was no solid leaf carpeted ground but the hands of that special someone which caught him firmly.
Seishirou had expected him to fall soon enough and he did. Impulsively after catching Subaru, he pulled him towards his body so that he could lean Subaru on him. But the outcome was not what he wanted, it turned out looking pretty much like a perfect embrace which Seishirou had not meant and he was wondering what Subaru's reaction would be to this.
Gaining his consciousness again after losing it for a few seconds Subaru now found himself in a much unexpected position with the other man. Subaru could hear his heartbeats. And who ever said that the Sakurazukamori was cold hearted? From this position Subaru could feel the warmness of Seishirou's body. But then no. This was unacceptable. This is the man that he hates. He hates this man! This is the man that killed his sister and destroyed his life.
'No' Subaru chocked as he tore himself away from the embrace that he had been searching for in his life. However before he could separate himself, the same pair of hands grabbed him giving him once again support which his body needed. Now on the verge of passing out, Subaru had no choice but to once again lean on Seishirou helplessly as he felt his consciousness draining fast. On the last second before he passed out, he heard something being whispered into his ear.
'I love you too...'
============================================================================ =================================
Subaru found himself lying on a white sheeted bed. Alone in the dark his eyes trailed around the room engulfed in darkness slowly looking at the displays of ornaments and antiques on the dressing table coated with dust to the tiny cracks on the blinded window sill. Listening to the silence of the room and the individual ticks of the expired brown clock on the bedside table Subaru spread his fingers gently on the bed sheet feeling the soft material as he swept across it. He watched calmly as he shaped the bed creases with every movement of his slender fingers. It was then when the white wooden door across the room gave a loud squeak and opened gushing in new light which illuminated half the room. Subaru who was dressed in his normal way, black satin shirt with white pants following the white trench coat that had hung above his shoulder for as far as he could remember, felt the need to get into a more comfortable position now that somebody had come. On his side with his elbow holding his weight, he watched with slight concern to whom the person was. As the person stepped into the light slowly the light revealed black. Black shoes with undone shoe laces being dragged on the floor, black pants and a trench coast similar to his but not. Wanting to sit up he was interrupted abruptly.
'Its okay you can stay like that.'
Despite hearing the mans words he moved to get up pushing his elbow against the bed to help him. Something told him that he was uncomfortable or a better word vulnerable. However before he could get up to secure his position he felt both his thin wrists being cuffed tightly and pushed roughly against the bed thrusting him down with considerable pressure which he did not expect. Slowly he felt his heart beats pace quickening. Looking through his bangs that were over his eyes he caught sight of the man who was now over him. Subaru desperately applied pressure to get his hands free but was in vain. The room had suddenly been engorged by silence. All he could hear was the breathing of the man. The clock tickings had drained into the surroundings.
'Lets continue where we left of shall we Subaru? My Subaru?'
Before giving Subaru any time to think, the man started tasting his neck as though tasting an ice-cream slowly giving him love bites on his neck slowly making his way down towards Subaru's chest. Subaru instinctively tilted his head to the other direction. Something in him told him not to fight, told him to go with the flow but together with it was something, someone that reminded him that this isn't the real him.
============================================================================ ================================= **************************************************************************** **********************************************
With a sharp breath Subaru awoke from the nightmare. Panting he studied his surroundings. Once again he found himself alone in a room just like his dream before but instead of darkness there was light. Instead of silence there were birds singing coming from the open window which had pale green curtains that gently fluttered with the cool breezed that blew in and out of the room. Subaru still lost and confused found the surroundings nearly similar to that in his dream. There were ornaments and antiques that did resemble those in his dream but he couldn't make sure. That didn't really bother him as much as the fact that he realized that he did not have a clear memory of the events that had happened. All he remembered was tiny scattered bits and fragments of memory that didn't complete the jigsaw puzzle. All he knew was that he was injured pretty badly and somebody took the trouble to fix him up. Every movement he made caused him pain. Bringing his hand to his temples, and he started massaging them in a rotary motion to ease the head aches After that he let his hands slip down to his neck attempting to warm them using the warmness of his neck when he felt marks on his neck. The dream was true. It did happen but what happen after that? Before that he didn't know. Straining and straining was of no good and had only made the head ache aggravate. Finally having no choice he gave up, leaning back down on the bed to satisfy his weak body, he buried his face into the soft white pillow. Subaru took a deep long breath and it was then when he realized a smell. A very very familiar yet distant smell from his clouded memories. Subaru let his mind drain into his memories searching for this smell which he knew held some importance to him. Searching and searching he remembered everyday after work returning home there would be this smell. Hokuto would be there and.him as well. In the instant of realizing that he sprang out of bed peering around quickly to see if Seishirou was anywhere in sight. It was now an obvious fact that he was in Seishirou's place. He started remembering all that happened after he pierced Seishirou which broke the spell but what happened before that he still didn't know. Still dizzy, Subaru forced himself out of bed, he felt the strong urge to find him. The thought of what to do when he faced Seishirou didn't even occur to him at this point. All he cared about was to see him and that would be enough. Just to see him. Helping himself with the support of the walls, Subaru pushed the glass door panel and wandered outside into the vast garden that spread as far as his eyes could see.
Once outside he let the winds past him by blowing his clothes, hair and anything loose to the direction of the wind. What surrounded him was a garden so beautiful that he would have called it Eden himself. 'Is this a dream?' he thought to himself. He knew that there was no such a place as this in Tokyo and his instincts told him that this is against reality. This was something else but there was no fear in his mind and heart just pain that has been there since that day years ago. Subaru made up his mind that no matter what this place is if Seishirou was here, then it was alright. Taking a few paces forward, it started showering lightly with Sakura petals. As if responding to scar behind Subaru's hands, one petal landed on the palm of his hand but all Subaru did was release it into the wind. After all he as already bound by the Sakura many many many years back and for eternity.
Under the huge Sakura tree, Subaru paused. The winds were starting to chill his skin sending countless chills down his spine reminding him of the pains of his life. There Subaru held on to his shoulders, eyes layered with tears, sunk his fingers into his trench coat trying to suppress the sadness of the recollecting memories that replayed as the Sakura fell. They reminded him of everything. Not that he had forgotten. He never had, never could. At this point he felt his own weakness. The penalty of having this weak heart was too much.
Fingers still sunk tightly on his trench coat, Subaru noticed something very different. The material that he was use to clutch felt different. Drying his eyes and clearing his sight Subaru looked at the trench coat hanging on his shoulders only to find what he should have noticed way before, it was deep black.
'I see that you have awakened Subaru-kun. But with that body I'm afraid that sooner or later I will have to carry you back into bed' came a voice from above the tree which Subaru was under.
Subaru face couldn't help but blushed slightly before he caught hold of himself again. Deep inside he was glad to see Seishirou again but.the problem was that he was out of words. He couldn't find anything to say. The fact that the thing that was shielding him from the bitter cold was Seishirou's trench coat made him feel ever more uncomfortable. Should he say thanks for saving him? But that wouldn't make any sense. Being in a dilemma of what to say, all Subaru did was look back into Seishirou's amber eyes which told Seishirou what he had already expected.
Finally deciding, Subaru reluctantly said 'Seishirou-san.today I wish to end it all' Subaru's eyes tried to look angry but sorrow was clearly what showed. The dizziness slowly catching up with him Subaru knew that he had a short time left and quickly slipped three ofudas between his fingers. Seishirou still lying on the tree branch up the tree did nothing but looked down amused.
'Seishirou-san I am being serious'
'Oh are you?' Seishirou replied making his way down the tree walking towards Subaru. Subaru feeling his heart beat increased as Seishirou advanced thought to attack him but before he did, Seishirou grabbed his hand gently and lowered it looking into Subaru's now trembling eyes.
'Doing that would have been a big blow to your body Subaru-kun and I cannot accept that.' Seishirou smiled.
Subaru, whose heart was beating in his mind, felt the dizziness gaining over him.
'Subaru-kun.what is it that you want from me?'
At hearing this, Subaru's mind cleared and started to panic. For what was he going to tell Seishirou? The truth? The truth even he didn't want to accept. He couldn't. he couldn't. He realized that this was the question that he had wished never having to answer in his life. But now it stared him right at the face waiting for the answer. 'To kill you..' Subaru lied.
'You were never good at lying Subaru-kun' Seishirou said with a slight laugh and returned to the serious question. Seishirou himself was in no better position than Subaru. If he told the truth, Subaru would know his true feelings towards him. But he wanted to know Subaru's side even if it risked letting everything spill out.
Seishirou lit his cigarette and inhaled it. After having done so he offered the same stick to Subaru who at first looked shocked and reluctant but then received it and slowly brought it to his lips and took a breath of it as well. He needed something to calm him down and a cigarette at this time was a good one. Seishirou just watched on amused.
'Hey Subaru-kun.why didn't you kill me when you had the chance?' Seishirou asked coolly but deep inside he was impatient for the answer. No reply. At the question Subaru tried to avert his eyes but Seishirou's eye burned eagerly into his.
'Don't you want to kill me after what I did to your sister? Isn't that your life's wish?'
All these questions were hitting Subaru's heart on their weak spots one by one.
With every question, Seishirou could tell that Subaru was getting weaker and weaker and that he was going to spill any minute now either that or he was going to pass out. Wanting to press on Seishirou felt that he was starting to lose his cool so he stopped and just looked back filled with eagerness. Subaru now with his head aches pumping into his head was slightly trembling. He no longer was looking at Seishirou he was afraid that through his eyes the truth would be exposed. Silence was what followed dreadful silence that seemed to Subaru as a long eternity but was in reality just a few clock ticks. Subaru found himself sweating not from heat or anything of that sort and his head rocking slowly forward and backwards. He was slowly losing his balance and even his heart beat was now causing the head ache to aggravate further. It was then that his legs gave way sending the rest of his body towards to ground. But what he landed on was no solid leaf carpeted ground but the hands of that special someone which caught him firmly.
Seishirou had expected him to fall soon enough and he did. Impulsively after catching Subaru, he pulled him towards his body so that he could lean Subaru on him. But the outcome was not what he wanted, it turned out looking pretty much like a perfect embrace which Seishirou had not meant and he was wondering what Subaru's reaction would be to this.
Gaining his consciousness again after losing it for a few seconds Subaru now found himself in a much unexpected position with the other man. Subaru could hear his heartbeats. And who ever said that the Sakurazukamori was cold hearted? From this position Subaru could feel the warmness of Seishirou's body. But then no. This was unacceptable. This is the man that he hates. He hates this man! This is the man that killed his sister and destroyed his life.
'No' Subaru chocked as he tore himself away from the embrace that he had been searching for in his life. However before he could separate himself, the same pair of hands grabbed him giving him once again support which his body needed. Now on the verge of passing out, Subaru had no choice but to once again lean on Seishirou helplessly as he felt his consciousness draining fast. On the last second before he passed out, he heard something being whispered into his ear.
'I love you too...'