Disclaimer: The characters within the story are the property of ABC. I am
not affiliated with ABC or the productions of General Hospital.
(I would to thank those who wrote in with comments. Thank you so much. I am so sorry this is coming so late, but I have very busy. I will post chapter three very soon. Thanks again!!!)
Chapter Two: Reflections on Jason
After Elizabeth had left, Jason had thrown himself into his work. He and Sonny had to deal with Alcazar and of course, Brenda. After the marriage to Brenda and the annulment shortly after, he left Port Charles - destination unknown. He could not be in Port Charles anymore. There was just too much drama. People coming back from the grave, faking deaths and of course having to lie to those he cared for the most. Elizabeth had left without saying goodbye and he soon found himself desperately wondering what was next for him. He tried to stay, but it was too much. Everything reminded him of her. He had lied to her, 'yes' and he knew that, but he was not prepared to sacrifice Sonny's secret. He should have told her, but it was too hard and his loyalty to Sonny was to strong. After he left, he realized it was that loyalty which would be his downfall. He loved his work. He loved the power it gave him - even if it was illegal, but it was not his work he left but the search for his own identity. He had become so caught up in his job, that he was not Jason Morgan anymore, but had become Sonny's everything and everything was just to damn much. Sonny had him on a short lease and Jason Morgan could not be tamed. It was not that Sonny was not his best friend, his brother even, but in his young life as Jason Morgan he had learned a lot, but especially learned that he made himself who he was - nothing more, nothing less. The Quartermaine's had tried to control him after the accident, but it could not be done and he could not allow it to happen with Sonny. He was too important to him and although this was the only life he ever truly knew, it was a life in which he was becoming someone he could not even recognize. He told Sonny it was time for him to go, but that if he ever needed him he would return. Leaving with only a knapsack and his cell phone, he left Port Charles.
He drove on his bike as far as the roads would let him. He traveled from small town to small town, taking in the scenery. It was interesting; he had never really taken the time to look at those things around him until she road on his bike. He stopped at different spots to just look around. Something he had never done before, he would see something he thought she would appreciate and stop to just enjoy it. It was her spirit or lack thereof both on and off the bike that drove him. It felt emptier with her not behind him and taking in the sites that made him stop riding so often.
After about a year, he got tired of his life on the road and decided that it was time to go home and face the people who mattered most in his life. There was much that needed to be said to only Elizabeth, but to Sonny. He needed his life to be different, he just wanted a life. Sonny had Carly and Michael, he had no one, never allowed himself to truly have someone and always putting work the top priority. He never stopped to enjoy his life and those in it. He needed to take back the control he had so readily given away. He went back to Port Charles to capture his new found aspirations for himself, but soon learned that not much had changed - even after a year. He went to the penthouse first to see Sonny, Carly and Michael. Upon his arrival, Carly showered him with affection and gratitude at coming home, Michael was distant at first. Jason had been moving in and out of his young life for years and those years had created a distance. It wasn't that there wasn't a bond or a closeness, but a casam of distance between the boy he was becoming and the man Jason wanted to be. It was ironic Jason had thought that although their journey's were different there paths were the same - they were growing up. Sonny greeted him with the love of a brother and that of a true friend. He was so pleased to see Jason and to have him back. Not soon after his arrival and discussion of the news in Port Charles and of Jason's travels, Sonny excused himself and Jason to talk business. Before Jason got the chance to explain how he now wanted things to be, Sonny started in on new threats and the business and what he needed Jason to do. Jason sat and quietly listened to the work which needed to be done, making a mental list of all that he would have to prepare. Without so much as a word for himself or what he wanted he left the Penthouse to begin the work he was told to do. He never even got the chance to ask Sonny about Elizabeth or about what we wanted to do next - nothing had changed and he realized that he had not truly changed either.
It was Christmas Eve and he was plotting his next move to help Sonny, not his next move for his life, but all for Sonny and work. He walked and walked all over Port Charles hoping to find her. Without even realizing it, he found himself at the Boxcar. The Boxcar held so many pieces of his past. After the accident, it was home, he spent time with Robin there and even his beginnings with Sonny, but there was also Elizabeth and her determination to save him in the snow. He stayed for what seemed like hours, but according to his watch only minutes had passed, when he heard someone approaching. Years of doing his job taught him to be cautious and he backed away slowly to watch whoever had arrived and monitor their threat level. He was so surprised to see her that he froze. He watched Elizabeth just looking around taking in the sight. He wanted to show himself, to talk to her, to hold her, but he froze and just stilled in the quiet night watching her. She was beautiful. Her hair was much longer than when he had last seen her. Her clothes were one's he did not recognize, but were presented in her unique style that was all to familiar to him, but there was more than that, she was different. He could see it, feel it - she was different and there was a sadness that he could not touch, could not verbalize, but it was present. He simply watched not wanting to taint the moment and was in that moment that he realized it wasn't their time. As much as he wanted to reach out to her, he could not. Nothing had changed and until things had, nothing would be different.
After she left, he went immediately to Sonny's. He told Sonny that he could not do what he wanted and that he was leaving again. Sonny of course was confused, but Jason could not offer an explanation, only saying that his life depended on it. He left without his cell phone or any means of contact. Sonny had not even had the chance to tell him about Elizabeth and her exhaustive efforts to find him. Emily received postcards every six months from some place far away, far removed from Port Charles. There was never a message and they were never signed, but she knew they were from Jason and in his own way he was letting her know he was okay.
He had left Port Charles to find himself and to escape her and now he was going to leave the country. He went from Asia to Egypt to try to find meaning, a purpose and find once again the man he once was and possibly could be again one day. He knew that he would see her again and there would be much to say, but he needed to see her again as a whole man, a complete man - not the figment he had become. He spent much of his time thinking of her, trying to think of the words he needed to mend the tear between them. He would often find himself daydreaming of her and a life together in Port Charles. He found it quit ironic that never in his life had he daydreamed, nor had he been a man of regrets -it was not his style, his personality, it was so untypically Jason Morgan that he found it disarming. But, he knew the reason a part of himself was growing - it was her and her influence. He actually grew to like these 'new' personality characteristics and became accustomed to there presence in his thoughts. He was changing -if only for the better.
Eventually, time had caught up with him and so had his wandering existence. Two years had passed so quickly, but not to quick. He had amazing experiences, too many to remember. He had not spoken to Elizabeth, Sonny, Carly and even Emily in all his time away. He did not even know what was to be expected of him or even how he would be received upon his return. He had left so abruptly and without so much as to a word of why or when he would return. He wondered even if he could really ever come home. He was different, very different and he was not sure whether those he cared for would accept him. He had always been described as a borg, as an enforcer and as unfeeling with a mask to hide behind, but those were his protection from the world and his guard against real life. His soul was not exposed, but a light was now shining from him that breathed life into his entire body and mind. He still wanted to work for Sonny, but on his terms. He still believed in honesty, but now realized that honesty was not conditional or dependent on circumstances, but had to be equal. He was still Jason Morgan, but this Jason Morgan knew how to dream and for three years tried to lived and tried to live for himself. He was ready to go home; he just hoped he still had a place in that home.
Although this long awaited decision to go home had been made, he was hesitant and nervous, but also prepared and self-assured and ready to face his past and God willing his future. Jason Morgan was coming home, but not alone as he had left. He was bringing a wife.
(I would to thank those who wrote in with comments. Thank you so much. I am so sorry this is coming so late, but I have very busy. I will post chapter three very soon. Thanks again!!!)
Chapter Two: Reflections on Jason
After Elizabeth had left, Jason had thrown himself into his work. He and Sonny had to deal with Alcazar and of course, Brenda. After the marriage to Brenda and the annulment shortly after, he left Port Charles - destination unknown. He could not be in Port Charles anymore. There was just too much drama. People coming back from the grave, faking deaths and of course having to lie to those he cared for the most. Elizabeth had left without saying goodbye and he soon found himself desperately wondering what was next for him. He tried to stay, but it was too much. Everything reminded him of her. He had lied to her, 'yes' and he knew that, but he was not prepared to sacrifice Sonny's secret. He should have told her, but it was too hard and his loyalty to Sonny was to strong. After he left, he realized it was that loyalty which would be his downfall. He loved his work. He loved the power it gave him - even if it was illegal, but it was not his work he left but the search for his own identity. He had become so caught up in his job, that he was not Jason Morgan anymore, but had become Sonny's everything and everything was just to damn much. Sonny had him on a short lease and Jason Morgan could not be tamed. It was not that Sonny was not his best friend, his brother even, but in his young life as Jason Morgan he had learned a lot, but especially learned that he made himself who he was - nothing more, nothing less. The Quartermaine's had tried to control him after the accident, but it could not be done and he could not allow it to happen with Sonny. He was too important to him and although this was the only life he ever truly knew, it was a life in which he was becoming someone he could not even recognize. He told Sonny it was time for him to go, but that if he ever needed him he would return. Leaving with only a knapsack and his cell phone, he left Port Charles.
He drove on his bike as far as the roads would let him. He traveled from small town to small town, taking in the scenery. It was interesting; he had never really taken the time to look at those things around him until she road on his bike. He stopped at different spots to just look around. Something he had never done before, he would see something he thought she would appreciate and stop to just enjoy it. It was her spirit or lack thereof both on and off the bike that drove him. It felt emptier with her not behind him and taking in the sites that made him stop riding so often.
After about a year, he got tired of his life on the road and decided that it was time to go home and face the people who mattered most in his life. There was much that needed to be said to only Elizabeth, but to Sonny. He needed his life to be different, he just wanted a life. Sonny had Carly and Michael, he had no one, never allowed himself to truly have someone and always putting work the top priority. He never stopped to enjoy his life and those in it. He needed to take back the control he had so readily given away. He went back to Port Charles to capture his new found aspirations for himself, but soon learned that not much had changed - even after a year. He went to the penthouse first to see Sonny, Carly and Michael. Upon his arrival, Carly showered him with affection and gratitude at coming home, Michael was distant at first. Jason had been moving in and out of his young life for years and those years had created a distance. It wasn't that there wasn't a bond or a closeness, but a casam of distance between the boy he was becoming and the man Jason wanted to be. It was ironic Jason had thought that although their journey's were different there paths were the same - they were growing up. Sonny greeted him with the love of a brother and that of a true friend. He was so pleased to see Jason and to have him back. Not soon after his arrival and discussion of the news in Port Charles and of Jason's travels, Sonny excused himself and Jason to talk business. Before Jason got the chance to explain how he now wanted things to be, Sonny started in on new threats and the business and what he needed Jason to do. Jason sat and quietly listened to the work which needed to be done, making a mental list of all that he would have to prepare. Without so much as a word for himself or what he wanted he left the Penthouse to begin the work he was told to do. He never even got the chance to ask Sonny about Elizabeth or about what we wanted to do next - nothing had changed and he realized that he had not truly changed either.
It was Christmas Eve and he was plotting his next move to help Sonny, not his next move for his life, but all for Sonny and work. He walked and walked all over Port Charles hoping to find her. Without even realizing it, he found himself at the Boxcar. The Boxcar held so many pieces of his past. After the accident, it was home, he spent time with Robin there and even his beginnings with Sonny, but there was also Elizabeth and her determination to save him in the snow. He stayed for what seemed like hours, but according to his watch only minutes had passed, when he heard someone approaching. Years of doing his job taught him to be cautious and he backed away slowly to watch whoever had arrived and monitor their threat level. He was so surprised to see her that he froze. He watched Elizabeth just looking around taking in the sight. He wanted to show himself, to talk to her, to hold her, but he froze and just stilled in the quiet night watching her. She was beautiful. Her hair was much longer than when he had last seen her. Her clothes were one's he did not recognize, but were presented in her unique style that was all to familiar to him, but there was more than that, she was different. He could see it, feel it - she was different and there was a sadness that he could not touch, could not verbalize, but it was present. He simply watched not wanting to taint the moment and was in that moment that he realized it wasn't their time. As much as he wanted to reach out to her, he could not. Nothing had changed and until things had, nothing would be different.
After she left, he went immediately to Sonny's. He told Sonny that he could not do what he wanted and that he was leaving again. Sonny of course was confused, but Jason could not offer an explanation, only saying that his life depended on it. He left without his cell phone or any means of contact. Sonny had not even had the chance to tell him about Elizabeth and her exhaustive efforts to find him. Emily received postcards every six months from some place far away, far removed from Port Charles. There was never a message and they were never signed, but she knew they were from Jason and in his own way he was letting her know he was okay.
He had left Port Charles to find himself and to escape her and now he was going to leave the country. He went from Asia to Egypt to try to find meaning, a purpose and find once again the man he once was and possibly could be again one day. He knew that he would see her again and there would be much to say, but he needed to see her again as a whole man, a complete man - not the figment he had become. He spent much of his time thinking of her, trying to think of the words he needed to mend the tear between them. He would often find himself daydreaming of her and a life together in Port Charles. He found it quit ironic that never in his life had he daydreamed, nor had he been a man of regrets -it was not his style, his personality, it was so untypically Jason Morgan that he found it disarming. But, he knew the reason a part of himself was growing - it was her and her influence. He actually grew to like these 'new' personality characteristics and became accustomed to there presence in his thoughts. He was changing -if only for the better.
Eventually, time had caught up with him and so had his wandering existence. Two years had passed so quickly, but not to quick. He had amazing experiences, too many to remember. He had not spoken to Elizabeth, Sonny, Carly and even Emily in all his time away. He did not even know what was to be expected of him or even how he would be received upon his return. He had left so abruptly and without so much as to a word of why or when he would return. He wondered even if he could really ever come home. He was different, very different and he was not sure whether those he cared for would accept him. He had always been described as a borg, as an enforcer and as unfeeling with a mask to hide behind, but those were his protection from the world and his guard against real life. His soul was not exposed, but a light was now shining from him that breathed life into his entire body and mind. He still wanted to work for Sonny, but on his terms. He still believed in honesty, but now realized that honesty was not conditional or dependent on circumstances, but had to be equal. He was still Jason Morgan, but this Jason Morgan knew how to dream and for three years tried to lived and tried to live for himself. He was ready to go home; he just hoped he still had a place in that home.
Although this long awaited decision to go home had been made, he was hesitant and nervous, but also prepared and self-assured and ready to face his past and God willing his future. Jason Morgan was coming home, but not alone as he had left. He was bringing a wife.