Scene Two, a brightly lit kitchen, mid-morning. MANNY is sitting alone at the table, eating a swiss cheese and ketchup sandwhich on rye. He is watching last night's "Reba" episode on the small Whirlpool perched clumsily on the linoleum counter. He is completely naked except for a black cap with the WB logo on it.
REBA (V.O.)
So I said, know why a nigger's like a remote control? 'Cause it's black and does all the work for you!
MANNY (dreamily)
Reba...my love. My pasty, red-headed, Southern Baptist, racist, Vince Gill-listening, pickup-driving, beef-eating love. If only I could hold you in my arms, touch your synthetic mane, caress your pocked face, idly finger your sopping, sloppy slot, I would be in heaven.
REBA (V.O.)
Reba Hart is no racist! In fact, I hate racists! About the only thing I hate more than a racist is a big sweaty black nigger, so there!
MANNY finishes his sandwhich and burps loudly.
REBA (V.O.)
Annie, what are you doing down there! Oh, Annie, I had no i- OH SWEET BABY JESUS IN THE MANGER!!! Annie, use your tongue a little! OH MY! OH, OH, GET IT, GET IT!!!!!!!
MANNY stands and stretches, then crosses the room to the sink, where he meticulously washes his plate, hands and mouth.
REBA (V.O.)
Annie, that was delicious. Now get your sweet ass down to the 7-11 for a pack of Kools and a six-pack. And if that Hindi bastard gives you a hard time about bein' underage, tell him to give me a call, I'll straighten his Vishnu-worshiping ass!
Scene ends.
REBA (V.O.)
So I said, know why a nigger's like a remote control? 'Cause it's black and does all the work for you!
MANNY (dreamily)
Reba...my love. My pasty, red-headed, Southern Baptist, racist, Vince Gill-listening, pickup-driving, beef-eating love. If only I could hold you in my arms, touch your synthetic mane, caress your pocked face, idly finger your sopping, sloppy slot, I would be in heaven.
REBA (V.O.)
Reba Hart is no racist! In fact, I hate racists! About the only thing I hate more than a racist is a big sweaty black nigger, so there!
MANNY finishes his sandwhich and burps loudly.
REBA (V.O.)
Annie, what are you doing down there! Oh, Annie, I had no i- OH SWEET BABY JESUS IN THE MANGER!!! Annie, use your tongue a little! OH MY! OH, OH, GET IT, GET IT!!!!!!!
MANNY stands and stretches, then crosses the room to the sink, where he meticulously washes his plate, hands and mouth.
REBA (V.O.)
Annie, that was delicious. Now get your sweet ass down to the 7-11 for a pack of Kools and a six-pack. And if that Hindi bastard gives you a hard time about bein' underage, tell him to give me a call, I'll straighten his Vishnu-worshiping ass!
Scene ends.