I think that it is time I took back the role of narrator for a little while and explain what happened to me when Idril was kidnapped.
After we had made love I had stayed awake all night watching her sleep, this may sound like a bad cliche but it was one of the most peaceful nights I had ever had. I stayed in the same place for hours until I became aware of commotion outside.
I could hear Aragorn shouting for me and commanding people to look for me so I intended to see what was wrong and come back. I did not think that Idril would wake for some time so I assumed that it would be alright to leave her for a short while. If I had known what would have happened then I would have locked her away from the dangers outside.
I was called to kill the dragons with my bow. They were not coming down close enough to slay with swords and men who had tried to kill the dragons with bows were not quick enough and were killed in a matter of minutes.
When I found out that they had Idril, I instantly set out to find her. We knew she would not of been killed as the others were, as they had been killed where they had been standing and left there. I would of gone on my own immediately to find and then save her but Aragorn and Gandalf insisted I wait and go with them and the remainder of the army. The next few days I spent in a terrible rage. No one could talk to me without being snapped or shouted at. They all moved too slowly and took to many stops for my liking. I kept imagining getting to Idril too late and finding her dead. I wanted to kill Saruman for taking her away from me.
When we reached her prison I almost did not want to go in to the tower for fear of finding her dead and having my heart broken.
My breath caught in my throat when I saw her chained to the wall and my anger reached new limits I did not even know I had in me. I am grateful for Gandalf and Aragorn's presence, if I had gone on my own and challenged Saruman I would of surely been killed.
Although I still loved her as much as I ever did, I noticed a change in her after we rescued her. She was reluctant to let me touch her and seemed to be much more melancholy. I do not think my guilt will ever subside, she was in that dreadful place, and she was subjected to Saruman's wrath. No good creature deserves that especially her.
I do not know what happened to her in that place and to be brutally honest I do not think I even want to know and it is for my own selfish reasons. I don't think that I could of been around her knowing what had happened to her and what Saruman had said or done. I loved her too much to let her go.
My selfishness did not last too long however. When her brother died it made her mind up too continue with our quest. I would of still run. I know that it is a cowardly thing to say but I would have happily gone away with her. She seemed so determined to leave with the army though that I knew it would be pointless to try and argue, I had tried to change her mind about things before and it had not worked!
I knew that our situation was becoming increasingly dire by the minute and I wanted to know once and for all what the outcome would be.