by IronRaven
editorial assistance by Lachesis-chan
Disclaimer: Shippou and company aren't mine. This story is AU, and is used to tie a pocket of space time into a rather interesting loop. :)
R for intense violence, strong language and suicide. If you are under a medical or psychological regimen for the treatment of depression, I do not recommend continuing past this point. (And the editor agrees, since it actually made her cry.)
---
Sigh.
I had a patient die today. That's not that hard to deal with personally, she was older and it wasn't a surprise. But her loved ones blamed me for her death. Cause of death was simple- old age, coupled with a broken heart. Her husband had died several months before. How do you explain to the family that loosing their parents was a natural thing and nothing could be done about it. Five hundred years old and three rounds of medical school still haven't prepared me for that.
That's not something I think I could live with. Or maybe I just grew up watching dependent men for role models, after my kitsune parents died. But if my mate was to die tomorrow, I'm not sure I would survive. How many times have I seen that. Probably the first times were just after our final battle with Naraku. I started to tell you that story, didn't I. I should finish it for you, shouldn't I.
---In the past
"Since we are in agreement that joining of our forces would be beneficial against that cursed monkey, brother, I must ask a favor of one of your party."
Saying that Inuyasha was surprised was an understatement. Sesshomaru had never asked him for anything. But a favor?
When Inu-otou stayed silent, probably from shock, Sessho turned to me. I remember feeling like I swallowed a snowball when the pale eyes met mine. "Shippou, I, Sesshomaru, must ask a favor of you. Kagome undoubtedly wishes you did not join in this fight, but I doubt you would stay behind. I know that Rin will likewise refuse to remain behind. Our father ordered a set of armour forged for Inuyasha shortly before his death, and I believe you would fit it. Would you wear the armour and stand as Rin's guard, close enough for you both to watch, but far enough away to be safe."
There was several seconds of silence as everyone stared at Sesshomaru. I don't remember saying yes, but it was the first time I had ever seen him smile as he bowed to me. He, Sesshomaru, Great Demon Lord of the Western Lands, bowed, to me, Shippou, an orphan who had hampered his schemes before. Bowed. He wanted me to protect his adopted daughter. And he smiled. In five centuries, I have never been more flustered.
Kagome closed her eyes, her lips moving silently. She must have been thanking the kami that I would be safe and out of the way. Inuyasha's mouth was still gaping, as were Jaken and Myouga's. The next thing I knew, I was being knocked from my seat by Rin's tackle or hug, depending on how you looked at it. "Rin so happy Rin won't be left behind. Shippou not strong and smart like Sesshomaru, but if Sesshomaru thinks Shippou is a good guard, then Shippou must be."
Over the next several weeks, we stayed at Sessho's castle. I think Inuyasha was happy, and I think Sesshomaru was to, after they got used to living in the same place with each other. Well, Inuyasha slept in the gardens, but it was close enough that we ate at Sesshomaru's table. They always snarled at each other, and they insulted each other, but it was like how I fought with Inuyasha. I think it reached the point they were doing it for fun. Sesshomaru sent his spies out, and Myouga left and returned at all hours of the day, sometimes by himself, sometimes with Jaken or borne on Kirara.
The armour was a tight fit, but the guard who had remembered Inuyasha showed me how to fix that. I guess Inuyasha was skinnier than I was when was little. Rin was used to grabbing onto Sesshomaru, and she was right, he was stronger than I was then. After a few days, I was glad for the armour, because she was used to wrapping her arms around him and squeezing as tight as she could. My ribs hurt, and so did my back.
The plan was simple. Sango would try to get Kohaku involved early on, and while they fought, Sesshomaru would un-kill him with the Tensaiga, even if the two of them had to break the boy's neck. That was exactly how Sango said it after Sesshomaru told us that Rin had been savaged by Kouga's pack (I knew there was a reason I never really trusted the guy), and was cold when he resurrected her with his sword. A simple broken neck (and anything else) would be easily enough dealt with.
Miroku and Jaken would deal with Kagura, with Jaken using his staff to burn the Saimyoushou from the sky. They would be close to Sango, as Kagura and Kohaku would probably be close together. Kagome had to sense the Jewel shards and slay Kanna before she could use her mirror on us.
That left Inuyasha and Kirara to deal with the odds and ends, along with fighting Naraku himself. We would have some of Sesshomaru's retainers with us, but we didn't think they would be of much good against all but the weakest of Naraku's demons. As the others killed their enemies, the thought was that they would join Inuyasha.
That was the plan.
It didn't last very long. One of Kagome's arrows found Kanna early, before she could use that mirror, and Jaken was happily blasting hellbees. But that was as far as it got. We didn't imagine that Kikyou would be there.
She stood there, gloating and taunting Inuyasha, standing next to Naraku, his arm over her shoulder. Her arm was around his waist, under the villain's white cloak. Inuyasha stood there like a stunned duck, staring at the sight. Kikyou aiming an arrow at Kagome made his mind up for him in an instant.
I think that was the only time I ever heard Kagome call someone a whore. The mikos let their arrows loose at the same time, and they both hit their target. Kagome collapsed, the arrow in her right chest. Kagome's arrow had cost the clay miko an arm. Inuyasha's claws cost her her head.
That was when I heard Sango shrieking. Something VERY large, with lots of claws and horns, had been under Kohaku's control. She was on the ground, clutching what was left of her side, trying to hold herself together, while the massive demon's arm was painted in her blood. Only Inuyasha might have survived a hit like that. Sesshomaru attacked from behind the monster, but I watched in horror as Kohaku blocked the blows of Tensaiga. Idiot, didn't he know we were trying to save his life?
The monster reached up and plucked them both of them from it's shoulder, and flung them to the ground. Sesshomaru had run Kohaku through as the monster's hand closed on them, but lost his grip on the sword when they were thrown. He barely rolled out of the way of the monster's stomp, but his white cape stayed behind, trapped on a toe claw of the beast. Kohaku had smashed down, once again among the living, atop his mortally wounded sister, and they could not avoid the massive foot. Kirara landed at their side, snarling as she tried to protect her mistress, but she was too late. And too much smaller than the beast.
My scream of horror was drowned out by Miroku's as he ran towards our friends, his love. The Kazanna and Sessho's Toukijin tore into the monster, but it was several minutes before it finally was dead. Jaken lay there, broken, bent in places that even a nasty little toad shouldn't be bent, his staff snapped at his side. And the Tensaiga, the only hope for the Sango, Kohaku and Kirara, had been shattered under the monster's foot. Miroku could not wrap his hand before collapsing with them, but the Kazanna was closed. Enough of the saimyoushou had gone into the hole to plug it, and were poisoning him.
Sesshomaru bellowed loud enough to shake the very ground, running towards Naraku. Rin was rooted in her footprints, staring at the fallen in horror, tears streaming down her face. I turned her away, and hugged her to me, wrapping her in my borrowed cape, letting our tears stream down my armour.
Naraku had been changing his shape though the fight. To face both of the brothers, he twisted himself into some kind of metal beast, nothing I had seen before. His claws tore at them both, immune to Sesshomaru's blade, but Tessaiga took of pieces of the metal flesh. A backhand blow slammed into Inuyasha, throwing him several hundred paces, nearly to where I was.
I couldn't let him lay there. I pushed Rin down, behind a boulder, and told her to stay there, as I tore the firerat cape from my armour, covering her with it, and dropping my helmet atop her head. Inuyasha lay there, barely conscious, the Tessagia in it's smallest form. The blade was driven into his side nearly to the gaurd, while the point, unstained, protruded from his ribs at different angle. The great, guardian blade lay shattered, forced into the body of it's wielder, wounding him gravely.
Toukajin, the sword forged for one purpose, to match Tessaiga in lethal perfection, was being blocked bare handed by Naraku as Sesshomaru lunged, again and again. "You miserable dog, do you think you can harm me with the tooth of my own child? I tire of this." Slashing out with one of his metallic limbs, Naraku blocked the blow, as his other arm swung towards the blade. With a single, soft, brittle snap, the last, best hope we had was broken in half. Sesshomaru glanced at the steel stub in disbelief, before being thrown back by a kick to his belly.
Naraku took one step towards us, laughing. I can still hear that laughter, centuries later. It was a cold, gloating laugh, the product of the most twisted and corrupted heart I've ever encountered, and it took delight in our apparent defeat. Behind him, the great dog that was Sesshomaru was released from his nearly-human form. Sessho pounced on Naraku, slamming him down in a tangled mass of teeth and claws.
The tiny voice of Myouga came from within my armour. "No, Master Inuyasha." I tried to grab him, tried to stop him. I didn't know what the flea could do. I called for him to come back. He replied that he had sworn to Inutaisho that he would guide and protect Inuyasha, if his father should die. I could no longer see him as he jumped toward the struggling forms of Sesshomaru and Naraku. But suddenly, without warning, Naraku screamed in pain, clutching at his eye. Forgetting his current form, the metal claws tore and rent at face as he tried to reach the source of the pain.
Inuyasha could survive having his brother's hand thrust through his belly. Naraku might have had a chance when Sesshomaru's paw stabbed through his chest, but the great jaws closing on his neck trapped the villain. Twisting his neck, Sesshomaru snapped the spine of the monster who had made our lives a living hell for all those years.
As Naraku lay there, Sesshomaru in his nearly human form tore the shards from the foul body. He ripped them out along with anything in the way, pausing to break Naraku's neck as the fiend's body was healed by his shards. When they were gathered, Sesshomaru snarled something. I was never sure, but it sounded like "I should have done this the first time we met", before plunging his fist full of shards through Naraku's throat. The body lay there. This time, Naraku didn't dissolve, and there was no little wooden doll inside.
As I helped Inuyasha to his feet, the blade in his side sagged under the weight of the handle, and was pulled free by gravity. The twisted, bloodied remains of the sword clattered on the ground like an old, dry bone. Despite the differences in their distances, Inuyasha and Sesshomaru made it to her at the same time, leaving trails of blood behind them. Rin and I were right behind them. Kagome could barely breath as the her hand was opened, and the shards placed in her hand. Sesshomaru left long enough to recover the shard that had been in Kohaku, and return. He placed it in her hands, then rested his one on her forehead. "You fought well, little human. I see why my brother chose you for his mate."
Inuyasha knelt at her side, wrapping both of his hands around her's, the now finished jewel in her hands, sobbing. "Kagome, I... I... I wish I had told you earlier... but I..."
That was far as he got when she breathed sharply, opening her eyes with a little cry, and then lay still, a dieing glow leaking from between her palms. Sesshomaru slid his hand down her forehead, closing her eyes, as Inuyasha howled in pain. We could smell her death. Inuyasha released her hands and grabbed his brother, throwing Sessho over my head and following the one armed Lord. Grabbing the front of Sesshomaru's armour in both hands, Inuyasha repeated slammed his brother into the ground, shaking him. "Bring her back, you bastard! Bring her back, damn you, or I'll tear out your heart!"
In a voice heavy with pain, Sesshomaru spoke. "I can't. Our father's swords are broken. I can't bring any of them back." Bowing his head, he prepared for his brother's red-eyed attack. "I'm sorry."
"No! You are lying! You always lied to me! She can't be dead. She isn't born yet. I'll bring her back! I'll use the jewel and bring her back! I'll bring them all back!"
No matter how he begged or pleaded with the four souls within that horrible pink sphere, she would not arise. I had to leave her body to see if Miroku was still living. It tore at my soul to do so, but Kagome was gone, and the only thing bringing her back now was the whims of the Jewel, but Miroku might still be alive. He was breathing, barely. Every vein and artery I could see was bulging out, and his hand.... If I saw a patient with a hand like that today, I would assume an industrial accident, or explosives. It was mangled. The hole was gone, but the physical price had been a hand that looked like shredded meat, shot through with bone fragments, torn purple silk, and parts of insect bodies, all burned black. Behind me, Inuyasha cursed and swore in anger at the jewel, damning everyone since Midoriko. And then he stopped.
Kagome still lay there dead, Inuyasha's black hair stroking her face as he kissed her cold lips, his tears dripping on her face. His black hair- the Jewel had made him human. "Fine. At least this way I can be with her." He pulled one of her arrows to him, and stabbed it into his belly, going up under his ribs, the half-amused smirk he always wore on his lips.
I think I screamed; I know I ran. That horrible jewel had cost me not one set of parents, but two. Twice I had watched my family destroyed because of that wretched thing. I caught him as he fell, already coughing blood as his heart tore itself apart of the arrow shaft, the head ripping his lung open. I'll never forget his last words. "Shippou, listen to your uncle. Sesshomaru, aniki-sama, look after... my son."
And with that, he was gone.
I'm sorry, diary, I can't finish this, not now.
---
Author's Notes:
aniki-sama: Aniki-sama is very respectful (meaning lord older brother), but the word can be broken differently, resulting in ani, or elder brother, and kisama, which roughly translates to "you bastard". (Thanks to Ainokaa-chan (dreamwater.net/hearthstones/iy/) for this reference.) Looks like the hanyou got the last word.
And to Daria, sorry, but as you can see, that wasn't Jaken in Komainu. Sesshomaru just likes his toadies to look the part.