A/N: Hi all, this is Chero. This story deals with the subject of incest,
and the pain it causes. I'm an incest survivor, and I remember how I
felt..... how I still feel sometimes. There will be dreams and flashbacks
with descriptions in them. Some of the things are what happened to me.
Also, I'm a girl, so some things might not be exactly as some guys who have
gone through this feel. So just as a warning, this's what this story will
deal with. I hope it can help someone.
A/N 08/07/03: I've decided not to continue with this fic being a companion piece to Hard Rain. I'm sorry if you guys liked the two together, but this fic is a sort of therapy for me. I need to feel free to take my time with it.
Maybe Someday
Chapter One: Hunter's Nightmare
Hunter sat, looking at the lake with a pensive expression. He liked the quiet, the peacefulness of the lake. Memories were starting to come back, from before he was adopted. And though he was loathe to admit it, he was scared.
Blake didn't even know about that part of his past. 'What would he think of me then?' he always thought. But Blake had been there when the nightmares had him whimpering, and then screaming. His new parents had kind of scared him at first. But they seemed kind. Not like Jake. Not like him at all.
They had knowledge in their eyes, as if they knew..... and part of him hoped they did, while another part wondered why they would want him here if they did. He was bad, wasn't he? Wasn't that what Jake had told him would happen?
As he thought, the sound of the lake lapping against the shore and the warmth of the sun lulled him into a deep sleep. And then The Nightmare came.
~Hunter, at 4 years old, was lying down in his bed. He had his favorite blanket, the one with the snakes on it. He was inbetween wakefulness and sleep, when the door to his room opened, casting a faint light into his barely open eyes.
Blinking owlishly, he sat up and squinted at the dark figure in his doorway. "Wha...? Jake, is that you?" He propped himself up in his twin bed, and rubbed his fists over his eyes.
"Shhhh," came a slightly deeper voice. His brother was tall, in his opinion. At 13, Jake's looks were the exact opposite of Hunter's. His dark brown hair was slightly long and curly, his eyes a dull brown. "Just stay quiet. Mom and Dad won't be back until Sunday night."
Jake came closer, his voice level, his eyes glinting. Hunter had a bad feeling. "It's okay. This is gonna feel really really good," he started, letting his fingers glide down Hunter's small frame, down to his groin. "But if you tell Mom and Dad, they're gonna blame you. You'll be put in a small room and they'll never let you out."
His voice was still level, but his breathing had become faster, as he slipped Hunter's underwear off. Jake stroked him, making him feel things. He felt bad, but good too. "Wha-what are you d-doing?" his voice squeaked out. Jake chuckled and slipped his hand to Hunter's small bottom, thrusting a dry finger inside him.
Hunter gasped, and started to cry. He didn't know what to do. 'Mom and Dad will send me away..... But it hurts, it hurts,' his mind repeated the last two words over and over.
Jake climbed over him, and Hunter felt him, large and hard against his buttocks. Taking his finger away, Jake thrust into Hunter, while Hunter's muffled screams went into his hand. When Jake was done, he took some Kleenex and cleaned the blood and semen from his now withered penis and Hunter's sore bottom.
Hunter was no longer crying. He lay quiet, pulling his knees to his chest and rocking. "Remember what I said," came Jake's voice from the doorway. "You tell, and you'll be a bad boy. They'll lock you up." And with that, the door slammed. ~
_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-
Cam was looking for Hunter, knowing why, and was embarrassed by it in spite of himself. 'Every time I think I'm going to murder him, he smiles and I feel like melting. That isn't a good thing. Now he's late for training, and I feel like murdering him. Let's hope he doesn't smile,' he thought to himself. It was ironic, in his opinion, that the one who irritated him the most had that power over him.
He frowned as he came upon the lake, and saw Hunter at it's shore. He seemed to be curled in a ball, and Cam wished he had a clue as to why he would be in a position that seemed so ... vulnerable.
As he became more aware of Hunter, Cam heard him whimpering, and saw that he was shivering. He was shocked that anything could make the crimson ranger look that scared. He crouched down beside him, and put a hand on Hunter's shoulder.
"Hey man, wake up," he stated clearly, nearly leaping in surprise when Hunter came shooting up, a look of hurt, terror and shame in his eyes. Cam was confused, but he said in a soothing voice, "Hunter, it's Cam. C'mon, look at me. You're awake, it was just a nightmare."
Hunter shook his head, blinking his eyes widely and trying to force his breathing to regulate. "Hey, thanks for waking me up," he said quietly, clearing his throat when it wavered. He could feel Cam's gaze on him, and didn't want it there. When he saw Cam reach out to pat his shoulder, he felt a bolt of fear, and jerked in the opposite direction. A feeling of guilt took it's place as he saw the hurt flash in the samurai ranger's eyes.
"What happened?" Cam asked, his voice still quiet, still soothing. Seeing Hunter's fear was making him act out of character ... but then, seeing the crimson ranger afraid was out of character in itself.
"N-nothing," Hunter lied, not wanting to talk about it. He was scared that if he said something, the memories would come back faster. What Cam would think of him ranked right after that though. "What time is it?"
Cam shook his head, and replied, "That's why I was looking for you. You're late to practice."
Hunter let out an oath, and sat up. Cam stood, and offered a hand. "Come on. I have to practice too."
"Thanks man. I can't believe I fell asleep. I don't usually do that," Hunter replied, running his fingers through his sandy locks. 'I hope that doesn't happen again, where people can see me. Especially... well, nevermind,' he thought to himself.
They walked silently back to Ninja Ops, absorbed in their thoughts. Finally, they reached their destination, and silently agreed not to talk about it.
Tori noticed something was wrong as soon as she saw them walk into the room. Even more so when Cam avoided looking at her. 'What's eating him?' she asked herself. Sighing, she shook her head, and got to work.
Alright, that's all for the revised version of chapter one. I feel that this fic will be more realistic insofar as the nature of Hunter's problem. I hope you liked it. I'll try to revise chapter 2 as soon as possible. Blessed be, Chero
A/N 08/07/03: I've decided not to continue with this fic being a companion piece to Hard Rain. I'm sorry if you guys liked the two together, but this fic is a sort of therapy for me. I need to feel free to take my time with it.
Maybe Someday
Chapter One: Hunter's Nightmare
Hunter sat, looking at the lake with a pensive expression. He liked the quiet, the peacefulness of the lake. Memories were starting to come back, from before he was adopted. And though he was loathe to admit it, he was scared.
Blake didn't even know about that part of his past. 'What would he think of me then?' he always thought. But Blake had been there when the nightmares had him whimpering, and then screaming. His new parents had kind of scared him at first. But they seemed kind. Not like Jake. Not like him at all.
They had knowledge in their eyes, as if they knew..... and part of him hoped they did, while another part wondered why they would want him here if they did. He was bad, wasn't he? Wasn't that what Jake had told him would happen?
As he thought, the sound of the lake lapping against the shore and the warmth of the sun lulled him into a deep sleep. And then The Nightmare came.
~Hunter, at 4 years old, was lying down in his bed. He had his favorite blanket, the one with the snakes on it. He was inbetween wakefulness and sleep, when the door to his room opened, casting a faint light into his barely open eyes.
Blinking owlishly, he sat up and squinted at the dark figure in his doorway. "Wha...? Jake, is that you?" He propped himself up in his twin bed, and rubbed his fists over his eyes.
"Shhhh," came a slightly deeper voice. His brother was tall, in his opinion. At 13, Jake's looks were the exact opposite of Hunter's. His dark brown hair was slightly long and curly, his eyes a dull brown. "Just stay quiet. Mom and Dad won't be back until Sunday night."
Jake came closer, his voice level, his eyes glinting. Hunter had a bad feeling. "It's okay. This is gonna feel really really good," he started, letting his fingers glide down Hunter's small frame, down to his groin. "But if you tell Mom and Dad, they're gonna blame you. You'll be put in a small room and they'll never let you out."
His voice was still level, but his breathing had become faster, as he slipped Hunter's underwear off. Jake stroked him, making him feel things. He felt bad, but good too. "Wha-what are you d-doing?" his voice squeaked out. Jake chuckled and slipped his hand to Hunter's small bottom, thrusting a dry finger inside him.
Hunter gasped, and started to cry. He didn't know what to do. 'Mom and Dad will send me away..... But it hurts, it hurts,' his mind repeated the last two words over and over.
Jake climbed over him, and Hunter felt him, large and hard against his buttocks. Taking his finger away, Jake thrust into Hunter, while Hunter's muffled screams went into his hand. When Jake was done, he took some Kleenex and cleaned the blood and semen from his now withered penis and Hunter's sore bottom.
Hunter was no longer crying. He lay quiet, pulling his knees to his chest and rocking. "Remember what I said," came Jake's voice from the doorway. "You tell, and you'll be a bad boy. They'll lock you up." And with that, the door slammed. ~
_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-
Cam was looking for Hunter, knowing why, and was embarrassed by it in spite of himself. 'Every time I think I'm going to murder him, he smiles and I feel like melting. That isn't a good thing. Now he's late for training, and I feel like murdering him. Let's hope he doesn't smile,' he thought to himself. It was ironic, in his opinion, that the one who irritated him the most had that power over him.
He frowned as he came upon the lake, and saw Hunter at it's shore. He seemed to be curled in a ball, and Cam wished he had a clue as to why he would be in a position that seemed so ... vulnerable.
As he became more aware of Hunter, Cam heard him whimpering, and saw that he was shivering. He was shocked that anything could make the crimson ranger look that scared. He crouched down beside him, and put a hand on Hunter's shoulder.
"Hey man, wake up," he stated clearly, nearly leaping in surprise when Hunter came shooting up, a look of hurt, terror and shame in his eyes. Cam was confused, but he said in a soothing voice, "Hunter, it's Cam. C'mon, look at me. You're awake, it was just a nightmare."
Hunter shook his head, blinking his eyes widely and trying to force his breathing to regulate. "Hey, thanks for waking me up," he said quietly, clearing his throat when it wavered. He could feel Cam's gaze on him, and didn't want it there. When he saw Cam reach out to pat his shoulder, he felt a bolt of fear, and jerked in the opposite direction. A feeling of guilt took it's place as he saw the hurt flash in the samurai ranger's eyes.
"What happened?" Cam asked, his voice still quiet, still soothing. Seeing Hunter's fear was making him act out of character ... but then, seeing the crimson ranger afraid was out of character in itself.
"N-nothing," Hunter lied, not wanting to talk about it. He was scared that if he said something, the memories would come back faster. What Cam would think of him ranked right after that though. "What time is it?"
Cam shook his head, and replied, "That's why I was looking for you. You're late to practice."
Hunter let out an oath, and sat up. Cam stood, and offered a hand. "Come on. I have to practice too."
"Thanks man. I can't believe I fell asleep. I don't usually do that," Hunter replied, running his fingers through his sandy locks. 'I hope that doesn't happen again, where people can see me. Especially... well, nevermind,' he thought to himself.
They walked silently back to Ninja Ops, absorbed in their thoughts. Finally, they reached their destination, and silently agreed not to talk about it.
Tori noticed something was wrong as soon as she saw them walk into the room. Even more so when Cam avoided looking at her. 'What's eating him?' she asked herself. Sighing, she shook her head, and got to work.
Alright, that's all for the revised version of chapter one. I feel that this fic will be more realistic insofar as the nature of Hunter's problem. I hope you liked it. I'll try to revise chapter 2 as soon as possible. Blessed be, Chero