Just as despair can come to one another only from other human beings, hope, too, can be given to one only by other human beings. ~~ Elie Wiesel
NIOBE AND MORPHEUS
She shakes her head as she steps out of the infirmary, her concern for Trinity greater than it had been when she walked in the door. She can only imagine what must be coursing beneath her friend's stoic mask, but the general impression she got simply reinforces the need to speak with Morpheus, whom apparently she just missed.
Time is rapidly running out. The strategy they are submitting to Zion isn't strong enough and, while she hopes that the tactical brains in Zion are going to conjure up a last minute miracle, she's not at all confident that's going to happen.
Which leaves Neo, she tells herself. And he's in a coma.
She blows the air from her lungs. But what if that's something we can change? she asks herself, returning to her internal debate. No, what if it's something Trinity can -
Distracted by her thoughts, she nearly walks into Maggie as she rounds a corner.
"Captain Niobe," Maggie acknowledges with a nod. The medic glances over Niobe's shoulder at the infirmary down the short corridor behind her. "I was just heading back. Any chance you were able to talk her into taking a break?"
She scoffs. "No."
In truth, she hadn't even bothered trying. She knew it would do no good. But as she sees Maggie shake her head, she catches the concern flash across her face. "What?"
"I don't care how strong people say that woman is," Maggie answers, "If she doesn't get some rest soon, I'm afraid she'll collapse. And I really don't want another patient on my hands right now."
"I know," she agrees. "But I also know you can't force Trinity to do what she doesn't want to do. Don't worry. She knows her limits."
"I hope so."
"Any idea what's caused Neo's coma, yet?"
"I don't know," the other woman answers with another shake of her head. "I've noticed a couple of interesting things, but…"
"But what?"
Maggie hesitates. "I'm still working on it," she finally says. "I'll let you know when I figure it out."
She frowns, wondering if, like Morpheus, Maggie is holding something back.
Stop it, Niobe. You're getting paranoid.
She lets it go but as the medic steps around her to continue on her way, she spins around. "Have you seen Morpheus?"
"I think I saw him heading to Roland's quarters. They're doubling up for now." The medic nods to a ladder behind Niobe. "Down a level, last room on your right."
"Thank you."
Less than a minute later, Niobe finds herself knocking on Roland's door. She waits impatiently, listening for movement within. After knocking a second time and still getting no response, she reaches out to try the door. Just as her fingers touch the cool steel, it screeches and is pulled away from her.
Morpheus suppresses a frown. He had opened the door thinking it might be Roland with word from Zion. Now he wishes he had ignored the knock.
"Captain Niobe," he acknowledges formally.
"Morpheus," she nods.
"Is there something I can do for you, Captain?"
"Funny," she says with a humorless smirk, "I was going to ask you the same question."
He raises his brows, but says nothing. Already, he can feel her unyielding gaze examining him.
"Mind if I come in?"
He hesitates for a split second but he knows he doesn't have any choice. If he doesn't let her in, she'll only make it that much harder on him. And whatever conversation is about to take place, he is sure he doesn't want it taking place out in the corridor where they can be easily overheard. Stepping back into the room, he pulls the door open to allow her entry.
"You look tired," she says quietly as she steps by him.
"I am," he replies laconically. Closing the door, he turns and leans back against it. "So, what can I do for you, Captain?"
Seeing that his inscrutable expression is firmly in place, she feels her irritation rise. She's always hated when he uses this particular mask with her. "You can drop the Captain bit, for starters." Not seeing even a flicker of a response on his face, she sighs. "I need to talk to you."
"Of course," he says, crossing his arms across his chest. "But are you sure we shouldn't ask Commander Lock for his approval first?" He cringes inwardly, regretting the words even as they left his mouth.
Niobe raises her brows. "Excuse me?"
"I'm sorry," he says sincerely. "That was… unfair."
Niobe tries to swallow her temper, but the annoyance still manages to seep into her voice. "Not to mention juvenile and unnecessary."
Morpheus sighs. Fully aware that he is already starting this out badly, he tries again. "What did you come here to discuss?" he asks, stepping away from the door. "If it's about further exploring our options, truthfully Captain, I think we both know we've exhausted the poss- "
"Stop it, Morpheus," she says crisply, pinning him with her dark eyes. She waits for him to say something. When he doesn't, she shakes her head, frustration easily readable on her face. "What's wrong with you?"
Clasping his hands in front of himself, Morpheus resists the urge to scoff, choosing instead to try to keep up the façade. "Aside from the inconvenience of having to wait to hear from Zion, I assure you, Captain, I am fine."
"Oh cut the bullshit, Morpheus!" Niobe snaps. "It's me you're talking to, remember? You've been avoiding me. You were distracted back there in the mess and you're -"
"If you are about to suggest I wasn't doing my best to help -"
"What I was about to suggest," she cuts in, "Is that there's more going on here than what you've told us. Even after what happened to the Neb…" She shakes her head, unable to keep her concern from softening her tone. "This isn't like you, Morpheus."
Morpheus holds her gaze for a long moment, the futility of it all setting in. Niobe's petite stature couldn't be a more deceptive disguise for her impressive strength and fierce determination. While they are qualities he admires and appreciates about her, they are also qualities he is well acquainted with - on more than one level. He knows how relentless she can be and right now, he doesn't think he has it in him to win this particular battle of wills.
Finally, he looks away, silently surrendering. "What is it that you want to hear, Niobe?" he asks with a weary sigh.
Grateful that he as at least dropped her formal title, she takes a seat in the chair at Roland's desk. "I want to hear what's going on with you."
"I don't suppose telling you to leave it alone will work."
She shrugs her shoulders, a corner of her mouth inching upward. "Why would it start now?"
Why, indeed. He moves to sit on the narrow cot across from her and rubs the back of his neck. The tension there has given rise to a dull ache at the base of his skull and he has a feeling it's only going to get worse.
Niobe watches as he rests his elbows on his knees and folds his hands together. His gaze is unwaveringly fixed on his hands and, sensing he is struggling, she patiently waits for him to work through it.
"Today…" she finally hears him say, "Today has not been a good day."
"Ever the King of Understatements," she mutters, arching a brow. She slides her chair forward, reducing the distance between them before she too, rests her elbows on her knees. "I'm really am sorry about the Neb, Morpheus," she says sincerely. "Believe it or not, I do understand what she meant to you."
Morpheus glances across at her. Only inches away from her now, he soaks up the warmth of a presence that was once so much a part of his life. "If anyone could understand, Niobe, it would be you."
"You lost a lot today, Morpheus," she continues empathetically. "You lost your ship; your home; you even lost Trinity for a while there. And now -"
"And now we're about to lose Zion."
"That hasn't happened yet," she returns, her voice firm.
"It will," he says, his eyes dropping to study his hands again. "Soon. And we won't be able to stop it."
She pulls her brows together at the certainty in his voice.
"This war is about to end, Niobe," he continues. "And it isn't going to be the ending we - the ending I believed we would see."
She remains silent for a moment, not quite sure how to respond to his temporary lapse in faith. "The plan could work," she finally says. "And maybe Neo will -"
"Neo won't," Morpheus says quietly. "He can't."
"Maybe he can," she argues, scrutinizing his sullen expression. "That's what I -"
"He can't, Niobe." Raising his eyes to meet hers, he slowly shakes his head. "Neo cannot end this war."
"He's not dead, Morpheus," she points out, misunderstanding him. "If he wakes up…"
Her voice trails off as the realization finally dawns on her. His lapse of faith isn't temporary.
She can see now, what has been bothering her since she first saw him at the briefing. Gone is the man who so confidently addressed the people of Zion at the temple gathering. Gone is the unshakeable belief that was once so visible in his eyes.
"You've given up," she breathes in disbelief. She sees his answer reflected in his eyes and, stunned at how easily he's surrendered, she pulls back in her chair. "That's bullshit, Morpheus! What happened to the man who spoke of being unafraid? What happened to the man who believed we could win this war?"
Morpheus stares back at her, his dark eyes resigned. "He woke up, Niobe," he says simply. "He was finally forced to wake up."
Rising to her feet, Niobe's frustration continues to taint her voice. "Look, I don't know what's going on with you, Morpheus, but it's not just about what happened to the Neb, or to Trinity or Neo. That leaves the only other thing you care about: the prophecy. So why don't you save me a lot of time and aggravation and just tell me what the hell is going on?"
Morpheus takes a breath, his shoulders almost sagging as he exhales. "The prophecy was a lie, Niobe."
There. He closes his eyes. It is done.
Niobe tenses. "What?"
"It was a lie," he repeats, finding the words no less difficult to say the second time around. "Neo reached the source. When the One reaches the Source, the war should be over. Yet here we are," he spreads his hands in front of him, "The war is still raging."
"Really? I hadn't noticed that," she retorts before she can stop herself.
Seeing him stiffen defensively, she clenches her fists, irritated with herself. She knows that attitude won't help the situation. "I'm sorry," she says, softening her tone. "I just thought…" She sighs. "Well, I guess I thought you'd have an explanation. You usually do."
"An explanation, Niobe?" Morpheus glances up at her with brows raised, interpreting her words on his own. "Don't you mean 'an excuse'?"
"I said what I meant, Morpheus."
He studies her for a long moment, searching for a sign that she is trying to revive one of their old arguments. To his relief, he sees only her desire to understand. "All right, Niobe," he nods. "I do have an explanation for you."
Niobe crosses her arms, already sensing she's not going to like what he has to say.
"After Neo and Trinity jacked out of the Matrix, he told us - "
"Wait a minute," she interrupts, "I thought you didn't have a chance to speak with him about what happened before the sentinel attack."
"I never said that, Niobe."
She works the muscles in her jaw, the understanding hitting her. "No, you're right," she agrees, the edge returning to her voice. "You didn't. You just implied it, didn't you?"
As she glares down at him, she isn't sure whether she should be angry that he has purposely misled her, or hurt that he felt the need to do so in the first place. "Well," she says tightly, "Are you going to tell me what he said or do we have to play Twenty Questions?"
Morpheus forces himself to hold her sharp gaze. He can't blame her for being angry with him. "He said the prophecy was a lie," he answers, repeating the words that have seared themselves into his brain. "That it was just another system of control."
"The Oracle told him that?" Niobe asks, her brows knitted together in confusion.
"No." He says with a shake of his head, reminded of yet one more thing he doesn't understand. "He said he believed 'him'. He didn't say who it was."
He watches as she turns away and braces himself for her reaction. When she doesn't say anything immediately, he keeps his eyes on her rigid spine, unable to help wondering what is going though her mind.
Her heart racing in her chest, Niobe moves her hands to her hips. It shouldn't surprise her. It's exactly what she had expected, what she prepared for. Isn't it?
"I can't help it, Morpheus, her own words echo in her hears, "I can't help thinking… What if you're wrong? What if all this - the prophecy, everything - is bullshit?"
And it is.
She swallows; her throat dry and constricted. She had never really believed in the first place, had she? She always had her doubts about the Oracle. The Prophecy of the One was just a pipe dream, one she resented at times. And Morpheus… Morpheus had just gotten sucked into the fantasy.
So why then, does she find herself suppressing a growing feeling of quiet panic?
The reaction forces old questions to surface, questions she thought she answered long ago. Has she merely talked herself into not believing? Is it possible that maybe, in a small, ignored corner of her heart, she has believed all along? Has she secretly been hoping that it was true, unconsciously depending on it so that if the more conventional methods of fighting this war failed, it would be there to fall back on and protect them in the end?
She doesn't know anymore.
In the last six months, she's seen Neo do things no one has ever done. What she hasn't seen, she's read about in detail in both Morpheus' and Trinity's reports. And then there are the stories and rumors that have made the rounds. She has used more than one explanation to rationalize it all to herself, but after what he did with Trinity and the sentinels…
It occurs to her then. While she still isn't sure she believes in the One or the prophecy per se, she has stopped denying that Neo is special. That's why she had helped him in his attempt to reach the Source, wasn't it? Because, with the situation so dire, if there was even the slimmest chance Morpheus was right…
"It seems you were right all along, Niobe," she hears Morpheus say bitterly from behind her.
She closes her eyes, refusing to be baited. "I hope you're not waiting for an 'I told you so'."
"After everything that's happened between us… I wouldn't blame you."
"I've seen some of what Neo can do, Morpheus," she says, turning back to face him. "And he saved your life. More than once."
"Yes," Morpheus nods soberly. "Neo is the One, Niobe. But the One… The One isn't what we thought."
"I don't understand," she mutters under her breath.
"Neither do I."
"No, I mean I don't…" Tilting her head back, she stares at the pipes above her, feeling her own fatigue catching up with her. "Why would she tell me that -"
"Who?"
Niobe hesitates. Placing her faith in the cryptic words of a soothsayer goes against just about every one of her natural tendencies. Yet here she is, trying to do just that. "Morpheus, what if…" She glances over at him. "What if there was a way Neo could still end -"
"He can't," he grinds out in frustration. "I just told you -"
"I know what you told me," she cuts him off. "But the Oracle -"
Morpheus snorts angrily. "The Oracle."
Niobe clenches her fists again. This time however, her frustration lies not with herself, but with him. She's not used to dealing with this Morpheus but it hasn't taken long to decide she doesn't like it. Taking a deep breath, she orders herself to keep her temper and be patient.
"The Oracle contacted us before the sentinels attacked, Morpheus. That's what I wanted to talk to you about. But this doesn't make sense. She gave me the impress -"
"The Oracle doesn't know as much as we've given her credit for, Niobe," he says, abruptly rising to his feet. "Either that or…"
"Or what?"
He frowns, instinctively not liking where his mind is taking him. "Either that or she's been lying to us all along."
"Why?" she argues. "Why would she do that?"
"Good question. Perhaps she isn't who I thought she was. But it doesn't really matter anymore."
"I don't know if I believe that." She raises a hand to rub a shoulder in an effort to massage the burning tension away. "I think she's risked a lot to help us. To help Neo."
Morpheus glares at the floor. "Help us do what, is the question."
"Would you stop with the childish self-pity for a minute?" Niobe growls. It takes every ounce of her self-restraint not to lose what little patience she has left when she sees him turn away. "Listen to me, Morpheus. I'm not sure what the hell is going on with the Oracle or the prophecy, but I'm trying to…" She tries to find the word. "I'm trying to understand."
Her eyes on his back, she hesitates again, struggling with her next admission. "And I want to believe in Neo."
Taken aback, Morpheus snaps his head around to look at her. She's never been one to believe before. Even after seeing Neo's abilities with her own eyes, he knows she has continued to doubt.
"Why, Niobe?" he challenges. "Why start believing in him now?"
She levels her dark eyes at him. "Maybe because he's all we have left, Morpheus. Maybe because one of us has to." Suddenly uncomfortable, she begins to pace in the small room. "I don't know. The Oracle's different but she -"
"What do you mean, she's 'different?'"
Glancing over her shoulder, she stifles her surprise. She thought he knew. "I mean she's different, Morpheus. As in not the same. But then… She is."
She stops for a moment to gauge his reaction. Taking in his expression, she almost smiles. At least she has his attention now. "She isn't the same woman," she explains. "The Merovingian… Somehow, he changed her. Apparently, he threatened to make her pay if she helped Neo and now he's making good on it."
"How is that possible?"
"Hell if I know," Niobe answers, rolling her eyes as she drops down into Roland's chair again. "She didn't exactly give me the details. And we both know I'm hardly an expert in the ways and means of the Oracle."
She watches in silence as Morpheus takes his turn at slowly pacing the length of Roland's quarters, knowing he needs time to digest it all.
I don't understand what is happening anymore, Morpheus tells himself. The prophecy is true because Neo is the One. But it's not true, because he can't end the war. And the Oracle is no longer the Oracle? But yet she is?
The Merovingian's words come back to him now. "Run back, and give the Fortuneteller this message: Her time is almost up."
He hadn't been certain exactly what he meant by that, but now… He shakes his head, his brow deeply creased.
The Merovingian is punishing the Oracle for helping Neo? Why? Coma or not, Neo can't end the war. Or does the 'trafficker of information' not know that?
He makes a turn, his eyes rapidly searching the cold, steel floor for answers.
Does it even matter? he argues, still feeling the sting of Neo's revelation. Does it even matter what the Oracle has to say? She's lied to us all along.
Or has she? Maybe she simply didn't know…
How could she not know? he counters himself, alternately clenching and relaxing the muscles in his jaw. She's an oracle!
He sighs, making a turn as he continues to debate in circles.
Why would she contact Niobe? It must've been important and if it was that important, why didn't she just tell Neo when he saw her?
Then again, maybe she did. Maybe he just didn't tell us...
He raises a hand to massage a temple, the ache in his head having only expanded as the minutes have passed.
What if what she told Niobe is just another lie?
What if it isn't?
Niobe watches him as he continues to pace. She can see the internal war he is waging with himself and wants to help, but she remains silent, knowing him well enough to know that he needs to work through this on his own. Finally, she sees him come to a stop.
He stands still for a brief moment. While the debate in his head is far from over, the need to know more has won out for now. "What did she tell you, Niobe?" he asks, finally turning to face her. "Exactly."
Niobe takes a deep breath before launching into her explanation. "She said that Neo touched the Source and separated his mind and body," she relays. "She said he's trapped between her world and ours."
"No," he says with a disappointed shake of his head. For a fleeting moment, he actually thought that what the Oracle told her might help explain things. Instead, it reminds him how misplaced his trust has been. "She's wrong, Niobe. Neo stopped the sentinels. That's when he collapsed. And that was after he returned from the Source."
"Look," she says, raising her hands. "I'm just telling you what she told me. Why the woman never just comes out and says exactly what she means is beyond me."
Arms clasped behind him, Morpheus returns to his pacing. Trapped between the Matrix and the Real World? How did that happen? Why did that happen?
A moment later, he stops in his tracks and faces her again. "Did she tell you anything else?"
"I asked if I could help him. I thought that was why she contacted us."
"And?"
"And she said Trinity could, but that she'd have to…" She pauses to remember the words. "She'd have to fight her way through hell to do it."
"And I have no doubt that she would," he sighs, her words causing a spark of his paternal concern for Trinity to rise. What does that mean? And is it only Trinity who can help him? Or can I do something for him, too?
Inhaling deeply, he slowly exhales. "Have you told her any of this?"
"No. I almost brought it up with her just now, but she looks like…" She shakes her head, much of what she picked up on with Trinity now making sense. "I wanted to speak with you first."
Morpheus sits back down on the cot and stares at his feet. For a long moment, neither of them speak, but finally, he raises his eyes to look across at her. "Why didn't you tell me any of this before now, Niobe?"
"Why didn't you tell me before now that Neo said the prophecy is a lie?" she counters, her brows arched. "Look, you were avoiding me, Morpheus. You didn't give me a chance to tell you."
"No, I suppose I didn't," he admits. He closes his eyes and pinches the bridge of his nose. "I don't know what this means."
"I don't either. But I got the feeling that Neo could still… finish this."
"But Neo said -"
"Morpheus, I don't know who told him what, but…" She pauses to rapidly search her brain for an explanation. "Look, I've read the reports. When Neo first saw the Oracle, she told him he wasn't the One. And he believed her, didn't he?"
"That isn't important, Niobe. It doesn't matter anymore."
"No? He's not infallible, Morpheus. What if he's wrong this time, too? He went to the Source, right? The machine mainframe. What if this is just a case of someone telling him what they want him to believe in order to deter him? What if it's just another manipulation by the machines?"
Morpheus remains silent, repeating her words in his head. What if he's wrong...?
It is what he wanted to believe when Neo first told him the prophecy was a lie and he wants to believe it is a possibility now. But at this point, he doesn't trust himself enough to know what to believe.
"That's a lot of 'what if's,' Niobe."
"Yes," she agrees. "But you have to admit, they are possibilities, aren't they? Or don't you think the machines are capable of a little deception?"
Again he says nothing. The machines are more than capable of deceit. The Matrix itself is proof of that.
Niobe falls silent as well. Over the past few minutes, she has seen a few, fleeting glimpses of the Morpheus she knows and loves. She's not sure if it's faint sparks of hope or flickers of belief that brought that out, but she knows that if fed, it might grow and spread.
And she wants it to.
Because up until now, she hasn't realized just how much he has needed to believe. And up until now, she hasn't realized just how much she needs him to believe.
"The heart never speaks," the Oracle's voice rings in her ears. "But you must listen to it to know."
Is that what I'm doing? she wonders with a skeptical frown. Or am I simply grasping at straws?
After another moment, she rises from her chair and moves over to sit next to him on the cot. "Morpheus, I don't have the answers, but I believe there is still a chance that Neo can do something to help us," she says with certainty.
He looks down as he suddenly feels the warm weight of her hand on his knee.
"You have to believe that, too," she adds.
"I don't know what to believe anymore, Niobe," he says, looking back at her.
"I'm telling you there's a chance," she repeats, her eyes flashing with confidence and determination. "And if there's a chance, we have to take it. We have to, because if we don't…" She turns away, shaking her head.
Her use of 'we' has not escaped him and when she doesn't continue, he looks at her with curiosity. "What is it, Niobe?"
She looks back at him, her lips curving upward at the irony of the situation. "I just never thought I would be trying to convince you to believe."
Morpheus returns her small smile. "Interesting reversal of roles, isn't it?"
Looking down at her small hand on his knee, he covers it with his own. His heart warms when he feels her respond by turning her hand to grasp his.
He concentrates on the distant familiarity of her touch and for a minute, he allows it to calm him. As much as he hadn't wanted to have this conversation with her, he is oddly grateful now, that she didn't let it go.
He gently squeezes her hand, wondering if she knows how much her effort means to him. Perhaps if things were different - if her situation was different - he might allow himself to do more than merely hold her hand. As it is, he reluctantly releases it and rises to his feet.
"Thank you, Niobe."
"Going to see Trinity?" she guesses as she watches him move away.
"Yes. If there's a chance she can help him, she deserves to know. And maybe she'll have more insight than I do."
Niobe rises from the cot, uncertain as to how to read him. Was it cautious hope that she just heard in his voice just now? Or was he merely relaying a fact?
Morpheus turns the wheel of the door, but just before he pulls it open, he hesitates. "I don't know what all this means, Niobe," he says quietly, staring at his hand where it rests on the wheel. The warmth of her touch has faded now, too quickly absorbed by the cold steel. "I don't know if what the Oracle said has any truth to it. I don't know how or even if Trinity can help Neo. If she does, I don't know what he can do to help us. But I do know you are wrong about one thing."
"Oh," she cocks an eyebrow. "And what is that?"
Turning back to her, Morpheus meets her gaze with an amalgamation of regret, sadness and love flashing in his eyes. "The Neb, Trinity, Neo and the prophecy…" he repeats her earlier list. "You're wrong if you think they're all I care about."
With that, he pulls open the door and steps into the corridor, leaving her to follow.