AN: Well…my muses couldn't leave me alone. They told me I left this incomplete. Perhaps I should fix that problem, ne? Thank you, everyone, for reviewing. ^_^ It made me feel special… Oh, and happy Easter~!

Warning: Same as the first chapter, 'cept the shounen ai undertones are less…undertone-ish.

Still the Same to Me
Chapter Two

Sanosuke had no idea what to do. It had been a month now since Kaoru's unfortunate death—a long, torturous month for everyone at the Dojo due to Kenshin's sudden depression. And things were starting to get weird. The other day Sanosuke had found Kenshin muttering to himself, almost as if he was talking to someone who wasn't there. Needless to say, it worried Sanosuke.

But every time Kenshin had done so since, he would notice Sanosuke's presence within seconds, stop, look up, glare at him or smile at him disarmingly. Whenever Kenshin would smile, Sanosuke would feel relief crash upon his shoulders like a waterfall…but when he was glaring, Sanosuke always had the urge to run. It seemed as if Kenshin was truly two different people now, and Sanosuke was frightened. Was this what Kaoru had been talking about—there being two Kenshins?

He hoped this wasn't. Yes, Kenshin was still the same Kenshin to him, but…he wasn't acting the same. The depression was understandable—but to see Kenshin lose control of his actions, of his anger like he had been…it was frightening. To see Kenshin snap at Yahiko to go away, or at Megumi for trying to clean his wounds, it was every ounce unnatural. If there were really two different Kenshins, Sanosuke wanted the old one back, the one who went, "Oro!" when embarrassed or shocked, the one who was humble and kind.

This Kenshin—this Kenshin must have been the true Hitokiri Battousai. There was almost doubt in Sanosuke's mind by now. At least tonight it was the normal Kenshin who was in control, and he was making dinner. Sanosuke watched as Kenshin silently cut up vegetables, watched as Kenshin was careful as he made the rice. It never ceased to amaze him that Kenshin acted so much like a woman at times, which was why he could never stop watching whenever Kenshin was doing so.

However, every down stroke of the knife became less like Kenshin's normal stroke. They became hesitant at first, then sped up. Sanosuke watched, tilting his head, when Kenshin stopped, bowed his head, and tossed the knife away.

"No…" he breathed out loud. "Damnit, Battousai, stop it. Stop ordering me around. I'm in charge—no!" Sanosuke was alarmed, but remained where he was, as Kenshin collapsed to the floor, clutching at his head. "I didn't meant to kill her. I—didn't—mean—to."

Then it was over. It seemed so much longer than those few seconds where the pain was so evident in Kenshin's eyes that it scared Sanosuke…what scared Sanosuke even more was the fear that was there, as well. As if nothing had happened, Kenshin stood up and resumed his cooking, and Sanosuke took that time to leave the doorway.

"Sano? Is Megumi-dono still here?" Kenshin called out from the kitchen, causing Sanosuke to stop in his movements.

"No, Kenshin, she left a while ago," Sanosuke responded, sighing. "She had an emergency operation to perform."

"Ah," was all Kenshin responded with. "Well, tell Yahiko that dinner will be ready in a few minutes."

His voice was dead and every ounce of weight it carried made Sanosuke wished that he knew what was going on in Kenshin's mind. He wanted to stop whatever it was, make Kenshin happy again. Kaoru had been able to make him happy…will Kenshin ever be happy again now that she was gone? Still, even if Kenshin was obviously so miserable, he continued to force himself to smile.

However, even that forced smile was becoming rare. Sitting down in the dining room, Yahiko not too far behind him, Sanosuke waited for the eating to commence in silence. Kenshin walked in, dishes ready for the three of them, and set himself down in front of them. "I'm starting work tomorrow. Without Kaoru-dono we need someone to work and I've decided that it will be me. It's the least I can do, that it is," was all he said as he sat down, picking up his bowl of rice and nibbling at it.

"Kenshin, you don't need to do that," Sanosuke muttered, picking up his bowl of rice as well. He was somewhat relieved that Kenshin decided to have a conversation tonight.

"Yeah, Sanosuke and I can go out and find work!" Yahiko added between mouthfuls of food.

"No," Kenshin breathed, "you two have your own lives, I'd rather not depend on either of you."

"Kenshin, stop being stubborn," Sanosuke said softly. "Ever since Kaoru's death you've been making things worse for yourself by burying yourself in work and little projects throughout the Dojo. You need to relax."

Yahiko nodded beside him, and Sanosuke felt that maybe, tonight, they'd be able to get through to the hardheaded rurouni. Such was not the case, however, as Kenshin shook his head. "By keeping my mind off things I'm helping myself little by little. I don't mind working all day, that I do not."

Sanosuke sighed, sitting back and deciding that Kenshin didn't want to talk anymore, so he finished eating his meal. He glanced over at Yahiko, who wasn't eating at all, just staring at Kenshin. "You're not the same anymore, Kenshin," Yahiko said finally, putting his bowl down and setting his chopsticks beside it. "What's happened to you?"

Kenshin just glanced up at Yahiko from his own food before sighing. "Yahiko, I'd rather not bother you with my thoughts. Please, just finish eating and leave it be. I will be fine, that I will, just give me time."

Sanosuke sensed Yahiko's next words before they even left his mouth.

"You were the one who killed her, weren't you?"

Kenshin slammed his bowl down, stood up, and walked out of the dining room.

"Oi! Kenshin, come back here and answer my—" Sanosuke placed a hand over Yahiko's mouth, shaking his head when Yahiko looked at him.

"Weren't his actions enough to answer your question?" Sanosuke breathed, removing his hand.

Yahiko glared at him, moved so he could get up, then changed his mind. "Just how much do you know of what happened to her?" he asked, "Why the hell is Kenshin acting like this, Sanosuke?"

Sanosuke sighed and stared towards the door, hoping that Kenshin would come back and apologize for his actions, so they could have another peaceful dinner like they used to have when Kaoru was around. "I don't know much, Yahiko," he began slowly, turning his eyes back to the boy, "but I do know he ended up killing her."

"I—how—why would Kenshin…?"

"She must have gotten in the way to try and stop him. I told you I don't know much. But he's—Yahiko, he's afraid."

Yahiko glared at Sanosuke before crossing his arms and looking away, his lower lip sticking out in thought. "Why would he be afraid? It was an accident, right?"

"…I sure hope it was, Yahiko, and by the way he's been acting, I'd say it was," Sanosuke whispered. "But don't you get it? He killed again. He thinks he'll go back to being a manslayer and he doesn't want that to happen."

"Kenshin wouldn't—not when he killed someone on accident!"

Sanosuke just nodded towards Yahiko, keeping his own thoughts to himself. He didn't want to worry Yahiko or get him worked up—Kenshin deserved a few moments of rest. "But he still killed someone," he muttered under his breath, standing up. "I'm going to check up on Kenshin, to see if he's alright. Can you clean up in here for him, Yahiko?"

Yahiko looked away from Sanosuke, picking up the dishes slowly. "Sure. Tell him I'm sorry for asking him about Kaoru, okay? It's my fault he's upset."

Sanosuke nodded and left the room, patting Yahiko on the head. The boy would never fully understand what was going on inside of Kenshin, and for that matter, Sanosuke wouldn't, either. But unlike Yahiko it seemed like Sanosuke had a chance of figuring some of it out. "Kenshin?" he called out, heading towards the rurouni's room.

"Leave me alone, Sanosuke," Kenshin growled once Sanosuke opened his bedroom door. "I don't feel like talking right now."

That—that wasn't Kenshin's normal tone of voice at all. Sighing, Sanosuke walked in, shutting the door slowly behind him. "I'm not leaving," he whispered, "until you tell me what's going on with you, Kenshin."

"It's Battousai. And there is nothing wrong with Kenshin, he's just taking a break right now."

Shit. How was he going to deal with this…?

"I have to compliment Kenshin, however. He lasted quite a long time, fighting off my control after her death. To think that all it took was one little question from that boy—Yahiko, his name was?"

"Battousai, let Kenshin have control again," Sanosuke whispered, praying that Yahiko wouldn't come to check up on Kenshin as well. "I want him back."

"You want him back?" Battousai turned, smirking, his golden eyes standing out starkly in the dark room. "Why do you want him back?"

Sanosuke stood, frozen for a brief moment, trying to stare Battousai down before turning his head away in shame. "Personal reasons," he whispered.

"He won't come back. He's no longer a wanderer since he's killed—you do realize that, don't you?" Battousai asked, standing up, treading softly towards Sanosuke. "He lost his reason to remain a wanderer. He loved Kaoru—probably not the same way that she loved him, but he loved her. Do you want him back now, knowing that he possibly will never love you?"

Sanosuke narrowed his eyes at Battousai. "What do you mean?" he growled, "I just want Kenshin back! Is that too much to ask?"

Battousai stopped and looked up, staring Sanosuke in the eye, his smirk never leaving his face. "What do I mean…?" he breathed, leaning against Sanosuke. "If I were Kenshin right now you'd want to hold me closer, would blush because I leaned against you like this. You're infatuated with my other half, aren't you, Sanosuke?"

Sanosuke backed up from Battousai, glaring at him. "Kenshin's my friend. That's why I want him back."

"You want him back because you love him and wish to help him. I will tell you a little secret—Kenshin is beyond help. He's asleep right now, unable to hear our conversation. What's stopping you from telling me that you love him?"

"What if I don't want to tell you?" Sanosuke muttered, clenching his fists at his sides. "Damnit, give Kenshin back control!" he hissed, his fingernails digging into his palms.

"If you love him, I should warn you," Battousai whispered, turning back around. "All of those who loved him like Kaoru did—they've died. By his hand. Do you accept that your fate is death if you love him?"

"Why should you care? Aren't you the legendary manslayer that's been fighting for control over that body? If I die it'll just be another dead body to you, you won't care about it," Sanosuke muttered.

"Yes, but if he kills another, then I'll be sure to have complete control. Tell me—is Kenshin still the same to you, now that you know of my existence?"

Sanosuke was taken aback by how soft Battousai's tone was, by how much regret there was when he said he would take complete control if Kenshin killed another. "He didn't mean to kill Kaoru, and you're not him. Of course he's still the same to me."

"He never means to kill those he's closest to. Like I never meant to kill Tomoe. We're both cursed, Sanosuke, and you have to accept that fact before you accept that you love one of us," Battousai whispered. "I was just making sure you knew what you were getting yourself into. I may not know you as well as Kenshin knows you, but I do know how much he doesn't want to burden you."

"He isn't a burden. I want to help him—please, give him back control, Battousai," Sanosuke pleaded softly, walking over to him. "Do you really want to cause him more pain by taking control?"

"Sanosuke…take good care of him until your death," Battousai muttered, turning around to face Sanosuke. He closed his golden eyes, took in a deep breath, and punched himself just as he had after the fight with Saitou. Once his eyes opened again, Sanosuke could see the pale amethyst and was instantly relieved.

"Kenshin…"

Kenshin blinked, then hugged Sanosuke for all he was worth. "Thank you…thank you for convincing him to give me back control, Sano…"

Sanosuke gulped before hugging Kenshin back, careful of his actions. "You're…welcome, Kenshin. Yahiko just wanted me to tell you that he was sorry for asking you about Kaoru."

"Did you answer me for him?" Kenshin breathed, looking up at Sanosuke. Sighing, Sanosuke nodded. "Does he think of me any different?"

"No. Like me, he believes you won't become a manslayer again," Sanosuke whispered, holding Kenshin closer. "And you won't, for as long as I can help it, Kenshin."

Kenshin nodded, resting his head on Sanosuke's shoulder before pulling himself away. "I'm going to go to bed now, Sanosuke. Please, take care of Yahiko for me."

Sanosuke watched as Kenshin sat himself down before nodding and leaving the room. Somehow, he knew that Battousai wasn't going to give up in his control so easily…but for now, he was glad that Kenshin would still be around for a bit longer…even if it was only for a little bit.