The (Malevolent) Wizard Of Oz
Heero felt as amused as he felt like singing in a falsetto voice; Relena and Duo's endless chanting of his name made him realise that to be the hero of an animé he'd need a better name than one which stated the obvious. Every so often they would pass large fences trimmed with bunting flags that were completely obstructing the view into the fields behind them, and whenever they passed these, the annoying chant became slightly different.
"Heero, can we go and see what's behind it Heero, Heero can we can we can we?"
"Heero, can we throw you on top of those spikes at the top of the fence to see if you die again? If you stay completely dead this time, I'll remove the orb"
Heero nearly considered Duo's offer, knowing that he wouldn't be alive to enjoy it (if Heero enjoyed anything out of life that is) but at least it would mean he'd finally be rid of Relena once and for all. Instead, he closed his eyes and continued walking forwards as he tried to forget Duo's repeated attempts at killing him by shooting him with phasers and other weapons laid around the Mobile Suit Road. He missed his footing since his eyes were still shut, and fell between three mobile dolls, thus destroying his moment of sheer coolness. They failed to activate and he resumed his original place without flaw in a gravity and life-defying leap vertically. His ears were greeted with a rendition of another incessant bout of 'can we can we can we can we can we can we can we?' and if he didn't live on animation cells he'd certainly require a trip to the dentist for all the times he had been grinding his teeth as of late. In spite of his best efforts to shut out his followers' conversation, he grunted tunefully in disgust as he heard them swapping tips on how to braid their hair.
They continued down the road until it drew into the later stages of twilight, and in spite of Heero not wanting to stop walking until he got to the Sanc Kingdom, he knew Relena would only whimper at the mobile suits whose main cameras had now lit up and made flashing noises every so often. The last thing he needed was another twenty minutes of her saying 'Heero, I'm scared. Please Heero, don't walk away from me again, I need you.' In fairness to Duo, he'd given up on his annoying Heero game, and he seemed equally as bored of the whining girl as he was. He often thought about turning the phaser on himself but then he realised Noin would never fall victim to bondage again, and then she'd probably live out a fairytale life—no, he couldn't have that, it was simply too nice. They noticed the mobile suit on which they stood come to life and shot a hole in the nearby fence, as if to give them a hint to leave the road whilst they had the chance. Relena held onto Heero tightly as he walked forwards whilst Duo whistled a happy melody, but one thing was for certain, none of them were expecting to see what lay before their eyes.
Inside the mammoth field was a gargantuan circus, and it seemed there was a show starting soon if the crowds were anything to go by. They walked through the lush sward until they reached the large Peacecraft, sorry, marquee, and then they saw a very strange sight indeed. A clown walked around with half a mask obstructing his face, and his hair was the oddest thing about him; it hung down over his forehead in a way that defied the laws of nature, and it seemed to swap sides of his head whenever he turned in different directions. They headed on towards the pergola and took some empty seats as it was a free circus in honour of Noin being freed from bondage and they were now able to pay her to appear in Playsuit for men once more. Relena twisted her arm around Heero's until she heard a snap and begged him to buy her some candyfloss before the show started. He stood up with his arm completely perfect and bore no markings of being broken at any time, never mind a few minutes beforehand. He bought two at the confectionary stand and ate one as he walked back. When he sat down, he handed the other one to Duo (an action that shocked Duo slightly more than pleased him) before handing the empty stick to Relena. She began to cry and she asked him 'But why, Heero?' to which he replied:
"It's sugar free"
He did his creepy laugh and settled comfortably to watch the show as Duo ate his guilt-free and Relena grinned in glee as she thought Heero had been looking out for her figure and wasn't as mean as he made out to be, in other words, she was delusional.
The star attraction was a young knife-thrower and her assistant, the strange person they had seen outside. Her aim was incredulous, and even Heero looked interested as the girl threw the sharp implements of torture at the boy. He called out to the boy, who lost his concentration and looked in the direction of the caller, and there was a crowd-swept wince and hushed cry of pity as the girl missed her target. Or rather, didn't miss him. Again, Heero was the only exception here as he resumed his creepy laughter as Catherine tried to remove the dagger from the boy's forehead. The curtains fell into their positions whilst the ringmaster, explaining the show would resume in a few minutes, gave out an announcement. Heero laughed heartily until his bladder felt weak from the strange strain and the extremely tight spandex, so he stood up and located the men's lavatory, shooting anybody in the line in front of him. His laughter finally became human-esque and he wiped tears away from the corner of his eyes as he relieved himself, distracted only by Duo shouting at him:
"What the hell are you doing? That guy could have been hurt"
"Taking the piss" Heero began laughing at his own joke even though Duo didn't find the pun remotely as funny as he did. Once they left the stall, Duo growled out a threat with an orb of yellow energy in his right fist as they stepped over the corpses Heero had left:
"Go find them and apologise to them unless you want to know what this will do, and for gods' sake zip up will you?"