A/N: Whew! Wow. This chapter I'm posting now was so difficult for me to get off the ground. I knew where I wanted it to go but I wasn't sure how I wanted it to get there. I think that's probably why I made it so short. (Sorry, but it is short.) I feel horrible because you all were so wonderful with your last reviews and so inspiring for me to update quickly, but I just couldn't make the chapter come out the way I wanted it to. Finally, I decided for it to come out this way, but I'm not too completely satisfied with it. We are, as you will see when you read the chapter, nearing the end. So reviews, are of course, especially welcome.
Disclaimer: I'm too tired to fight about it now. So, no, I don't own Inuyasha. No, I don't own any of it. Except my storyline, so if you screenwriters come up with an episode even remotely like what I've written here, I will sue. (I will also be very honored and giddy…so maybe I won't sue, but…ah, hell, just whatever, use it if you want, I can't really stop you.)
Thanks: Wow. I'm so floored! The last chapter surpassed all my previous records for number of reviews! I think I got like 20 reviews, which is way beyond what I'd ever gotten before. I am so giddy if I lifted my feet, I'd fly. Thanks everyone so much! It really meant a lot to me that you all reviewed to let me know what you thought of the fluffiness that I was so worried and nervous about.
I'm also completely amazed to find that I'm on the favorite author list of 8 people…eight! I'd like to say thank you very,very,very much to Trinity Kirara, pruningshears, Evil Irish Eyes, lagatadiabla666, Yoshiko-Rae, Banshee3, LilacRose23, and RavenShadow for all putting me on their list. It is so special to me to find myself on anybody's favorite author list. Thanks.
LilacRose23: Howdy, Lilac! I'm just glad you like my story so far and very thankful and honored that you took the time to review. I was so worried about the fluffiness in the chapter, but thanks to you and all the other reviewers, I think I've lost some of my fluffiness fear. I have seen Pirates of the Caribbean and Boy, was I impressed. Johnny Depp has been a favorite of mine since…wow, since before I rightly knew what I'd do with him if I got him, and so I knew I had to go see it. Orlando Bloom is steadily growing in my list of favorite actors. I was very happy with the movie and so I'm naturally giddy that you thought to compare the happiness you felt with the movie to the happiness you got with my chapter! Thanks so much! ^______^
Trinity Kirara: ::Puck grins wickedly at Joy:: Yeah, I know. Ain't it a scream being able to go just to the edge of the rule without breaking it? ::Emania smiles apologetically:: I didn't want Kag telling Inu about the Death Mess yet because she still thinks she can handle it. I think my fic is turning out to be something of a realization, maybe for Kag and me both, that independence doesn't mean that you never rely on anybody but more like that you should know when to rely on people and when you're being dependent on them. I wanna see how far I can take Kag without her depending on Inu. Oh, and btw: thanks for putting me on the fav list! I'm positively giddy!
RineoOHeartilly: My biggest worry was that it was too OOC. I knew it had to be somewhat OOC because of the very nature of the scene, but I'm glad you don't think it was too OOC. I'm also happy to hear you think it was sweet. I tend to think I suck at 'sweet' stuff which is why I tend to have a lot of angst in my fic. You're very welcome, you are mature, and the getting past the stereotypes is a very good practice. I wish all people did that. About the VCR: ::mumbles incoherently about darn old VCRs. Puck looks up from tying the neighbors' kids shoelaces together and smiles at her:: How about you leave it recording when you go to sleep? ::Emania glares at him:: That would be a great idea, Puck, if she had a tape with enough time on it to record! ::Puck shrugs:: I just provide ideas, I never said they were workable ones. ::Emania sighs:: You might also be able to buy a new one for like 50 bucks at BestBuy or Circuit City or something. They have awesome sales on VCR players cause now everyone wants a DVD. Thanks for the compliment, and I will try to keep it up.
Pruningshears: That's a very interesting way to get a name. I've done stuff like that. I once named a doll I had "muneca" which is Spanish for doll just cause I was put on the spot for a name. It stuck with her to this day, btw, she's still known as "muneca" which is quite amazing to me. I'm so glad that the fluff worked that I feel I can breathe now. Like I said, I'm not particularly fluent with fluff and I'm always afraid it's going to be too OOC or too 'porn-like' you know? I always feel kinda uncomfortable about that stuff. About Kikyo analysis: Well, yeah, I guess that's the way I see it too. Without the same entire soul, Kag isn't Kikyo, so yeah, I agree with you. You honor me with your comments. Thank you. I never thought I'd be anyone's "inu fic idol" even if I have to share the title with LilacRose. She's cool, I have read her stuff, so I don't mind…actually, it only adds to my honor! ^_~
AgentScully: Hey! No prob about the quote. I just like getting that stuff as close to what really happened as possible, but don't stress yourself. As long as people understood the general gist of where I was going with it, I'm good. whew! Glad that the fluff wasn't too off-putting. Yeah, I thought about how to make that chapter a little less OOC but couldn't seem to do it if I wanted them to admit how they felt. So I think you're right ("When you're right, your right, and you…you're always right") that any piece of writing having Inu and Kag admitting their feelings is going to feel a little OOC. I'm just glad it wasn't so OOC to take you out of their world, per say. I actually considered splitting the chapter up so that each chapter was one of their pov's but I couldn't bring myself to do it. (actually, I was afraid I'd get death threats or something!) Hey, I said I enjoyed constructive criticism, but I'm not one to complain when I get a compliment, so, very humbly, thank you. (X-Files…if they do another movie and think they can get away with the same crap they did in the episodes where they just didn't mention something and thought we'd be satisfied, they've got another thing coming. They better show some Mulder/Scully action in the next film…and I swear on Chris Carter's head if they have Doggett and what's-her-name fowling it up, I will be very, very, angry…or at the very least write a very nasty letter.)
Banshee3: Thank you! Nice to hear from a new reviewer! I will try to keep it up! Thanks for the help with the quote. If I've at least got it right from the manga, then I'm not that worried! ^_^
Yoshiko-Rae: blush Thanks so much. As I said before, I was very worried about the fluff, so thank you very much for reviewing to let me know that it wasn't disappointing or so out of character it made you hate the story!
Niku: Good fluffy? YEY! Good OOC? Double YEY! I couldn't decide when I was planning out the scene who should make the first move, so when Puck inspired me to write that she start it and he finish it, I just went with it. It seemed like a good compromise. I'm glad it didn't disappoint! Thanks for reviewing…again! You're great! ^_^
Moon Fairy: blushes to a new shade of red previously undiscovered I really enjoy your reviews. Thank you to infinity and beyond for all the compliments. I'm sorry I didn't update so quickly this time but as I said above, I was having some trouble deciding how to approach this chapter. About my responding…well, it never occurred to me not to respond. After all, you guys take time out of your busy lives to not only read my fic but review it as well, and I think if you can do that, then there's no question about me responding to what you've said, and answering some questions if you've got them. Besides the fact that I like doing it. It makes me feel like I've got some new friends out there! ^__^. Thanks again for reviewing!
Lady Jade: blushing Awww…I'm so glad to hear I could make your day better. It means so much to me as an author and as a person to think that something I wrote brightened your day. And I'm especially grateful to you for reviewing and easing my fear about the amount of fluffiness in the chapter. Thanks. And I hope this chapter goes over as well. I hope your days have improved! ^_~.
Evil Irish Eyes: You should know, usually when I respond to reviews, I end up copying them onto a blank page and responding under it so that I can see what the wonderful person wrote so that my response is at least somewhat on topic to what they said. The reason I mention this, is because with your review, I couldn't do that. It was soo long! ^______^;; Now, this is not me complaining. Not at all. This is me amazed! This is me thankful and incredibly pleased. ^____^
I'm so glad that the fluff went over well. Even if it was in massive doses…or should I say, despite the fact that it was in massive doses?! ^_~ (By the way, sorry Garlend, that you got caught inside! ::Puck laughs, Emania glares at him:: That's not nice, Puck. ::Puck tries to sobers, but looses the battle:: Sorry, ::chuckling:: It's just that she looked so cute lost in the fluff…:: chuckles:: Glad you made it out alright, though, Garlend ::Emania sighs:: What can I say? He's a trickster.) The fact that you think my plot's juicy means a lot to me. ::Looks around to suddenly realize that Puck had gone off somewhere, mumbles:: Well, I wonder where… ::looks up:: Well, anyway, your reviews always mean a lot to me and I'm always not only amused but increasingly pleased by the intelligence in them, so, humbly, thank you. ::Watches as Puck shows up with a bunch of colorful wildflowers in his hand:: Aww, Puck, that's nice. ::Puck raised an eyebrow at her.:: They're not for you. ::Emania frowns:: They're not? ::Puck shakes his head, smiling. He hands them out to Garlend.:: Sorry you fell in my fluff and sorry you got chased. ::Emania melts:: Awww, Puck, that's really sweet. ::Puck blushes:: Well, you know, I have a heart. ::Emania raises an eyebrow:: Yeah, when you want to. Anyway, thanks Evil, Garlend, for the wonderful review. ::Puck waves:: Bye!
Aeyikie: Thanks for reviewing! Sorry about school. But you know what I say about people who have it in for you… "keep smiling. It makes them wonder what you've been up to." Anyway, about your new character…she sounds cool. Is she good or bad?
ex Driver Liz: I'm so happy that even if it did seem a bit OOC you still thought it was good. I'm sorry I couldn't continue any sooner, but I was having trouble deciding how to start this chapter. I will try to continue writing after I finish this one. I've got a few stories that Puck keeps bugging me with so I'll probably have to write one of those. Thanks, again, for sticking it out with me. ^___^
Sukuri: very big grin One of the best compliments I could get as an author is that you liked my fic despite not typically liking the era. It means a lot to me. Inu on Adultswim rocks. I'm sure the subbed version is better, but considering how limited my internet connection is, I would've never been able to see them. I'm also incredibly honored that my fic made you smile and laugh since I've been exactly in the same position with another fic I read once while I was at lunch at work. People kept thinking I was crazy, too, so I understand and am pleased beyond words that my fic had that effect for you! Thanks for reviewing! ^_^
Katergator: laugh out loud Yeah, I wish I could screw homework, but unfortunately, I can't. I sidestep it whenever I can, though! I'm glad that you think the OOC works for Kag. I knew I would have to make her the most OOC in the fic because of where I wanted to take the fic, so I'm glad that despite it, it works. Thanks for thinking I'm doing a great job and for saying my story's addicting. It means a lot to me. Thanks for reviewing! ^_^
Eartha: grins In the next few chapters, we'll learn a lot more about death. Actually, in this one, you'll actually learn his name! Wow…22 chapters later! heehee Anyway, thanks for reviewing and thanks for liking the fluff. I was so nervous! ~_~ but I'm okay now. At least, about that chapter! And it's all thanks to reviewers like you! So, thanks again!
Inuphoria/Inuyashafan: Hey! Great to hear from you again. Great name, btw. Thanks for reviewing to assure me of the fluffiness. Very glad it pleased. Hope this chapter pleases, too! ^_^
Dia: Wow. Your review was so well thought out and eloquent that it made the compliments in it all the more pleasing to me. And it also makes the fact that you don't think my fluffy scene was OOC even more convincing and especially soothing to my frayed nerves. I almost convinced myself to take it out or tone it down, but I couldn't seem to make myself. It seemed like the right thing to put in that moment so I'm very happy to get some confirmation. I'm so glad that your favorite scene was the scene with Inu and Kag. I hope this next installment doesn't disappoint. Thank you so much for your thoughtful review. It means so much to me when anybody just reviews to let me know that they've read and liked my story, but when someone writes a review like yours, well it just pleases me to no end. ^_^
RavenShadow: smiles Definitely the unrequited love is what drives us…I think it's what drives any true romance story, and there has never been a truer romance story than that of Inuyasha and Kagome. I'm very happy that you liked the chapter, despite its fluffiness. I am a big proponent of people being snapped out of their "dark little voices" as you so eloquently put it, and I do have something planned for having Kag and Inu get over them, so when the time comes (a few chapters down the road) then I hope it's everything you hoped. Thanks for reviewing and I hope to hear from you again! ^_^
Jen: big grin I happen to be in a Linkin Park phase right now, I think. Linkin Park and Evanescence, which as you probably know, is where I got the title for this particular chapter. There's another song from Linkin Park that I wanted to use, but I don't know if I'll be able to fit it in. Thanks for commenting on that. I was rather proud and a little sad that nobody had mentioned it. I'm horrible with titles, but I take a lot of time to pick out the titles for the chapters, if I'm not inspired by a particular song, so I was happy that you commented on it. Thanks and I hope to hear from you again! ^____^
Chapter 21: Whisper
"Whispered voices at my ear / death before my eyes / lying next to me I fear / she beckons me shall I give in / upon my end shall I begin / forsaking all I've fallen for I rise to meet the end"
-Whisper, Evanescence
Kagome was cold.
She realized this despite knowing that she wasn't awake. She was somewhere between asleep and awake, between dream and reality, and although she knew this, could somehow realize this, she didn't know exactly where she was. She couldn't even be sure if her eyes were open or closed. All around her was darkness. Not the darkness like in the forest when the sun goes down or the movie theatre before the movie flickers on the screen…no…a complete darkness. The kind of darkness that is the total absence of light…the kind of darkness that prevents you from knowing where you are, what's before you, or even if you're right side up…
The kind of darkness where nightmares were born.
And in this darkness there was nothing, nothing lived or breathed, nothing moved or made a noise…and yet…Kagome could feel she was not alone.
She felt the magical pull of power, felt herself drawn forward though she dared not move.
She felt the first prickling of fear stir inside her.
Then she heard the soft sounds come to her out of the darkness—whispered voices calling out to her, ringing around her like uncontrolled echoes reverberating, but they were too quiet, too quick, and too rushed for her to make out what they said. They remained just slightly out of reach. She strained to hear them, but although she could make out the sound of voices, she couldn't make out the words no matter how she tried.
She was frightened, frightened beyond anything she had ever felt before because there was nothing but this darkness, no one around her and although she didn't know what to expect, she did know that this was merely the beginning. She knew, with a certainty that surprised her that there was more…much more to come. She wished that it would be over. The need to scream nearly overwhelmed her. She wished for Sango to be at her side, for Mirouku steadiness, but above all, for Inuyasha.
She felt the warm tears travel down her cheek and tried to reach up to wipe them away but found she couldn't move. She tried to open her mouth, but even though she sent her body the signal to react, it simply stood still. She was immobilized. By fear or by something else, she couldn't tell, only that she couldn't move. The panic crashed into her then.
How could she fight Death if she couldn't even move? She had already lost and the real fight hadn't yet begun.
'I can't do this,' she thought frantically. 'I don't want to do this. Please, somebody, help me!'
The whispered echoes gained in momentum, so much so, that Kagome realized she could now make out snippets of words…
…half breed…get him…love you…that's him…kill him…
Kagome fell to her knees in the darkness, collapsing under the pain washing over her in palpable waves. She screamed, but no sound came—no sound but the whispers…
'Inuyasha!' she yelled in her head. 'Please!' the tears were streaming down her face.
...murderer…half breed…
'Inuyasha! I can't wake up, wake me!'
Kagome started awake, tangled in her sheets and drenched in sweat. The sound of her heartbeat thrumming in her ears, the remnants of the pain fading as her heart slowed.
She could still feel the strength of the magic pulling her, calling to her and as her heart beat slowed, she could hear the whispered voices still at her ear.
She half expected the whole household to awaken. She looked to her side at where Sango was sleeping peacefully on the rollaway bed. Sango hadn't woken. She listened to the sounds of the sleeping house, half expecting to hear the pound of bare feet running down the hallway, but…
Inuyasha hadn't come.
And the voices still whispered. 'Could nobody else hear them?' she wondered. Was she going mad? Maybe it had all been just a dream. Like another of the visions…but the magic was still there, was still tugging at her, all the more insistently the longer she waited.
She looked out her window and knew it was no dream—
She fought back the urge to reach over and wake Sango. She knew she would be there for her, she knew Sango, like Mirouku and even Inuyasha would fight to the death to protect her if she woke them and told them what had happened…what she felt…that he was still out there, waiting for her…
But she resisted. In her dream, she had felt as if she couldn't win, hadn't she? So, what was wrong with waking Sango and the others? What was wrong with asking for their help? Wasn't that what they had all in one form or another been trying to tell her? If she couldn't do this…if she couldn't face him and survive, then why shouldn't she wake them? Why shouldn't she let them stand at her side as they had countless times before?
If you get involved and hurt or killed, then I couldn't live with myself even if I did defeat him.
Her own words rang in her mind. She had meant them…each and every one. She would rather face him herself, even knowing that she would die, than let them get in harm's way even with the remote possibility that they could save her. She wouldn't be able to live with herself if they died trying to save her from her fight…her death…
This battle was hers alone…because Kikyo had started it and her soul must finish it…but even beyond that, because she could help him. Because he was a soul in pain and she had the means to save him from that pain…
It was as she came to this realization, that it all fell into place…nobody else could hear the whispers because this was nobody else's fight. They couldn't hear them because they couldn't help her. This was her fight, and he was waiting just for her.
'You're waiting for me, aren't you?' she asked silently.
'For decades now,' came the distinct response as if it had been whispered right at her side.
Startled, Kagome looked around her, but her room was still, Sango's breathing easy and regular beside her on the rollaway bed. She looked back out the window and saw the glow coming from the well house.
'What are you doing here?' she asked.
'You brought me here,' was the cultured reply.
'I did?' Kagome thought.
'You called to me, you helped forge this link between us, and now, it is time for you to come to me, Priestess,' the voice repeated. 'I am weary of waiting.'
Kagome watched the glow from the well and felt her own magic start to rise inside her as if in response. She sat up, the fear draining from her, replaced by the calm she felt every time she purified a fragment of the jewel, she felt herself go to that place she went when her magic rose to the surface, a place where she was not afraid or insecure…a place where she knew what her destiny held…a place that was peaceful because it was a place where she was complete. She welcomed it, basked in the soothing feel of her magic, like slipping on a comfortable robe.
'Yes, Benten,' she thought, the name coming to her as if she had always known it, but only just remembered it. She felt a flash of a memory go through her like a scent on the breeze…
…yes, that's him…Benten…the water demon…he killed the children…
'We will finish this,' Kagome whispered, rising from her bed.
+~+~+~
A/N: Sorry to leave you on another cliffy. I really had a lot of trouble writing this chapter, and even now, I'm not too secure in it. But I feel it had to be written like this, almost as a bridge.
Anyway, I'm too tired to do much else to it, so if there are some glaring errors, please review and let me know about them. Thanks!
p.s. I just realized that the review responses are longer than the actual chapter…sorry! ~_~;;