Shade: Just to piss all you Yu-Gi-Oh fans off, this is the final episode. And it ain't got no Judge Yami in it, suckers! BWAHAHAHAHA!
(cut to Shade)
Shade: Man, it's been a while, hasn't it? What shall I ridicule this week? I know, how about Yu-Gi-Oh?
KittyMonster: YES!
Shade: If you're unfamiliar with Yu-Gi-Oh, which you aren't, I don't blame you. I just recently grasped the utterly stupid concept revolving it. This is right up there with Pokemon, but it goes even further than that level of bullshit.
Pikachu: Buy EVERYTHING IN JAPAN. ^_^ (that means buy)
Shade: Because see, you don't have to watch it for more then five seconds before realizing how painfully obvious it tranforms and presents itself as a marketing vehicle.
Yu-Gi-Oh Exec 1: How do we sell the cards?
Yu-Gi-Oh Exec 2: We should make a cartoon. About cards!
Yu-Gi-Oh Exec 3: shoes...
Yu-Gi-Oh Exec 1: My god...
Shade: Yu-Gi-Oh has been around for a while. It has caused an immense amount of hype, but it was onlya couple of weeks ago I sat down and analysed the mayhem. Every second of watching this inane babble produced a million questions in my mind, most of them starting with "Why?" Why WHY WHY?! Like, why do people watch this? And what kind of person would watch Yu-Gi-Oh?
Guy 1: (watching Yu-Gi-OH) HOLY CRAP. HE FLIPPED A CARD! I wonder what he'll do next?! OH SHIT, HE FLIPPED ANOTHER CARD!
Shade: As fun and exciting as a CARD GAME is, the creators of Yu-Gi-Oh go a step further by adding intense dialogue amidst the card flipping. Each character spends TEN YEARS (I counted) explaining their next move. Not only does this ruin the non-existent suspense, but... oh who am I kidding? IT IS SIMPLY AWESOME!
(cut to Ryou Bakura playing Joey)
Ryou: Now I will use my Demon Pumpkin card! The Demon Pumpkin card will stand there and look scary while powering up my zombie monsters by 30 percent and with every attack I make, you lose 15 percent of your life points divided by two times six minus 15 of your health points AND HAHAHAHA I AM EVIL!
Joey: I have a peculiar New York-ish accent.
Shade: And why does the main character, who looks to be about twelve years old, sound like an over-zealous, 30 year old super hero/parent?
Yami: Remember kids, always brush your teeth and suffer immense amount of pain daily. It builds character!
Shade: I also noticed that the antagonists have an odd habit of calling the hero a 'dweeb' every other word.
(cut to Weevil and Shade)
Weevil: So dweeb, I have my ultimate super special card out. What, dweeb, will you do now, dweeb? DWEEB. WHAT NOW, DWEEB? Mr. Dweebinator... THE DWEEB?!
Shade: (grabs baseball bat) Oh, I probably will hit you in the FACE.
Weevil: OH PLEASE DO NOT HIT THE CARD MASTER IN THE FACE!
***************THE END!***************
(cut to Shade)
Shade: Man, it's been a while, hasn't it? What shall I ridicule this week? I know, how about Yu-Gi-Oh?
KittyMonster: YES!
Shade: If you're unfamiliar with Yu-Gi-Oh, which you aren't, I don't blame you. I just recently grasped the utterly stupid concept revolving it. This is right up there with Pokemon, but it goes even further than that level of bullshit.
Pikachu: Buy EVERYTHING IN JAPAN. ^_^ (that means buy)
Shade: Because see, you don't have to watch it for more then five seconds before realizing how painfully obvious it tranforms and presents itself as a marketing vehicle.
Yu-Gi-Oh Exec 1: How do we sell the cards?
Yu-Gi-Oh Exec 2: We should make a cartoon. About cards!
Yu-Gi-Oh Exec 3: shoes...
Yu-Gi-Oh Exec 1: My god...
Shade: Yu-Gi-Oh has been around for a while. It has caused an immense amount of hype, but it was onlya couple of weeks ago I sat down and analysed the mayhem. Every second of watching this inane babble produced a million questions in my mind, most of them starting with "Why?" Why WHY WHY?! Like, why do people watch this? And what kind of person would watch Yu-Gi-Oh?
Guy 1: (watching Yu-Gi-OH) HOLY CRAP. HE FLIPPED A CARD! I wonder what he'll do next?! OH SHIT, HE FLIPPED ANOTHER CARD!
Shade: As fun and exciting as a CARD GAME is, the creators of Yu-Gi-Oh go a step further by adding intense dialogue amidst the card flipping. Each character spends TEN YEARS (I counted) explaining their next move. Not only does this ruin the non-existent suspense, but... oh who am I kidding? IT IS SIMPLY AWESOME!
(cut to Ryou Bakura playing Joey)
Ryou: Now I will use my Demon Pumpkin card! The Demon Pumpkin card will stand there and look scary while powering up my zombie monsters by 30 percent and with every attack I make, you lose 15 percent of your life points divided by two times six minus 15 of your health points AND HAHAHAHA I AM EVIL!
Joey: I have a peculiar New York-ish accent.
Shade: And why does the main character, who looks to be about twelve years old, sound like an over-zealous, 30 year old super hero/parent?
Yami: Remember kids, always brush your teeth and suffer immense amount of pain daily. It builds character!
Shade: I also noticed that the antagonists have an odd habit of calling the hero a 'dweeb' every other word.
(cut to Weevil and Shade)
Weevil: So dweeb, I have my ultimate super special card out. What, dweeb, will you do now, dweeb? DWEEB. WHAT NOW, DWEEB? Mr. Dweebinator... THE DWEEB?!
Shade: (grabs baseball bat) Oh, I probably will hit you in the FACE.
Weevil: OH PLEASE DO NOT HIT THE CARD MASTER IN THE FACE!
***************THE END!***************