"I cannot believe this." Frank studied the letter, brows furrowed, utter confusion in his voice. "'My great, almighty, revered Tallest'" he read out loud "'I have now been on this wretched mud-ball of a planet for six months, and I feel that I have done much to advance Operation Impending Doom 2. However, my quest for enslavement of these pathetic worm-babies has hit two major hitches. Number one: this SIR unit (GIR, as he likes to be called) has become increasingly unproductive, and constantly makes strange requests for massive amounts of horrible, horrible meat-products! THEY BURN!! Number two: A large-headed Earth cretin-child by the moniker of "Dib" is constantly trying to undo all my glorious plans to enslave humanity. Please send battle tanks, missiles, and what ever you might have lying around in return for the SIR unit. I will not fail you, my Tallest. Signed: Mighty Irkan Invader Zim. P.S. Send snacks." Riff placed his hands in front of is mouth, trying to seal in the gleeful sniggers. Like everyone else, he wasn't sure how the strange little robot had ended up at their doorstep, but he thoroughly enjoyed Frank's exasperated befuddlement. Frank rubbed at the corner of one heavily made-up eye "I think I heard of the Irkan race once, not one of the finer species of the known galaxy. They're total fu." Frank's thought was interrupted by a loud crash behind him in the foyer. GIR had somehow climbed up on a stuffed panther, and had knocked it sideways into a Ming vase. "Stop that!" Frank raged, and took off one platform shoe, which he threw at the robot with deadly accuracy. GIR fell head first onto the floor, and giggled helplessly "Imma po-tat-o bandit!" "You broke the poor thing!" Columbia gaped at Frank, horrified. Frank rolled his eyes "Have some sense, Columbia. The damnable thing was already defective before we acquired it." Columbia picked up GIR and hugged him "Well, I think he's cute!" "Even if it's eating your vest?" Magenta pointed to the shredded piece of material in GIR's mouth, and to Columbia's exposed left breast. Columbia gasped and dropped the robot, which once again landed on his head. Frank turned to Magenta and Riff-Raff, sneering. "Since you two are the ones who whined for extra help, and got us stuck with this malfunctioning piece of scrap metal, this GIR robot is now in your supervision. See that he does not get in my way, or punishments will be very severe." Frank turned on his heel and strode out of the room, grabbing Columbia's wrist "Come. We have.ah. work to do." Magenta groaned and kicked at GIR, her toes connecting painfully with the robot's metal posterior. "This is entirely your fault!" she snarled at Riff. "You're the lazy bastard who was mewling about 'too much work.' See the mess we're in now?!" "You supported the idea, you dim-witted bitch!" Riff shot back, bristling. "Fuck you!" Magenta screamed, and stormed up the stairs to the second story. Riff closed his eyes, his temples throbbing 'Go AWAY! He thought savagely at GIR, 'Just go away!' No such luck. GIR was still there, rocking back and forth and smiling sedately. "Come with me." Riff said sourly, and started for the estate's back yard. For once, GIR obeyed the command, and clanked alongside Riff. "Wanna see inside my head?" the robot inquired. "No!" Riff snapped. "Oookaayy!" GIR reached up and neatly removed the metal plate that was the top portion of his head. "See?" Against his better judgment, Riff looked down. The robot's interior seemed to be made up of bent paperclips, crumpled pieces of paper, and other assorted bits of refuse. "I thought robots were supposed to be filled with advanced machinery." Riff commented. GIR shook his head, looked confused and then nodded. "I 'unno. I wants to be filled with booty TACOS!!" "Shut up, will you?" Riff swung open the entrance to the rear lawn. Hearing the creaking of the door, three huge German Shepherds surged out of rickety dog houses, barking furiously, pulling against heavy lengths of chain. "SHUT UP!" Riff bellowed at the guard dogs, throwing a rock in their general direction. Turning to GIR, he smiled maliciously and pointed at the ground "Go out there, and trim the grass, one blade at a time. Also, remove all the pebbles and leaves you find. Get out there, NOW!" GIR saluted briskly, his eyes turning red "As you say, my master." A second later, they had turned back to their greenish shade, and GIR laughed insanely as he pointed to a rodent climbing the edge of the fence. "Lookit the squirrel!" Riff grunted as he picked up the robot and heaved him into the guard dogs' midst "Good riddance, pest." He laughed as he turned and bolted the door. Mentally congratulating himself, Riff turned and made for the wine cellar.