A/N: I don't own anthing, anyone, or even my own soul for that matter. It
is 25% homework, 50% band, and 25% HP fanfiction. You won't get anything
from suing me, as I am broke. Oh, and all comments are appreciated (even
flames), especially if they make me laugh (author in a good mood is MUCH
better than an author in a bad mood).
Oh, and a shout out to Sly4 for being my first reviewer! Go you AND me! *giggles insanely*
Chapter 2: The New Harry
"Harry, why don't you sue the name Jamie Evans? It's a pretty neutral name, and you won't have a problem remembering it as it's a combination of your parents names," Hermione supplied eagerly.
Ron looked over at me and said under his breath "Jamie," as if testing it out, then nodded, saying, "I like it, it suits you, and it's not a big stretch.
After a moment of thought, I assented. Slowly, we pieced together my personal history: Born a half-blood in rural England, I moved all over to accommodate my Muggle father, who was paranoid that someone would harm my mother. At the age of three, both parents were killed in a car accident (thanks are in order to Vernon Dursley), which landed me in a London foster home of a married witch and wizard, who home-schooled me. Last summer they both died in a an unfortunate attack by Death Eaters on a mall complex, which resulted in leaving me, at age 18, to decide my own future. Dumbledore kindly took me in and decided to let me finish my education there.
"Right, then, 'Jamie,' you'd better get some sleep or else Madam Pomfrey will have my head for a bedpan," Dumbledore said jovially, standing up to leave.
"Thank you, Professor. By the way, how long until term starts?" I asked.
"About a week, why?"
"I can just stay here, correct?"
"Of course, Jamie."
"Thank you sir."
Madam Pomfrey entered the room at that moment and shooed everyone else out, then handed me a dreamless sleep potion. As the warm liquid slid down my throat, all blurred to nothingness and sleep became my refuge.
"Jamie?. Jamie. Jamie, wake up!"
"Hmmm?" I asked, rolling over.
"Wake up Jamie, I don't think you want to discuss this with Ton around, so we have to do this now, while he's sleeping!" Hermione whispered urgently, pulling lightly on my arm.
"Mmm." I said, pulling the pillow over my head.
"Come on, there are some things I need to tell you." she trailed off.
"Whaaat?" I whined, turning onto my back and staring sullenly as possible in the morning.
"Well, I assume you don't remember much about female anatomy?" she asked, slightly flushing.
"Um." I said, blushing myself.
"Alright, let's get this over with." she said, digging around in her bag. She pulled out a tape measure and began to measure different aspects of my body (hips, bust, waist) while saying, "Well, you're going to need new clothes, and yes, bras as well, sorry, and I'll have to teach you how to act more like a girl0"
"I don't want to be all bloody girly!"
"No, just you have improve your posture and gait, we can't have you stomping around everywhere-'
"I don't stomp!"
"Well, maybe not stomp but is certainly is too. ungainly for any girl. Oh, and you'll need to know this sooner or later, sooner is better, so you'll be prepared."
"What?"
"A. - Guys will hit on you-"
"WHAT?!"
"Hey, you're a pretty innocent girl until you establish your reputation and personality to the school at large. Oh, and B. - You'll most likely have a period."\
". Are you serious? PMS and everything?"
"Well, every girl copes differently, although since you're not used to any of this, it may hit you harder. Maybe you'll be lucky enough to not have bad cramps, but."
"Cramps?"
"They're like a bad stomachache, you'll know it when you feel it. Here's a bag of some essentials you'll need soon which I didn't think you'd particularly want to buy. Oh yes, how are you feeling?" Hermione asked with a gleam in her eye, one that I knew didn't bode well.
"Better. why?" I asked hesitantly, afraid of the answer.
"Well, we need to go buy you some clothes, of course!" she said, her eyes lighting up. in the shape of dollar sings, or hearts? . Hmm.
"I suppose you're right and I can tell there's not talking you out of it, so I guess we can."
"Great! I'll just lend you some of my clothes until you get your own- :
"Not underwear, right?"
"No, you can just wear yours until we get you some girl underwear," she replied, rolling her eyes.
"You don't mind loaning my some clothes?" I asked hesitantly.
"Of course not! All girls loan each other clothing! Which is why we'll have to burn all your old clothes-"
"What?!"
"Settle down! I just meant the obvious stuff that girls shouldn't own. you can keep certain sweaters and stuff."
"Oh joy."
"Oh, cheer up! It's not that bad."
I glared at her vehemently, causing her to duck her head guiltily.
"Anyways, are we taking Ron?" Hermione asked after an awkward moment.
I thought for a moment and decided against it, telling her so. His moral support would have been nice, but it might be somewhat embarrassing and tedious for him to go clothes shopping with 'two girls,' however.
"I thought you'd say that, so I left a message on his cloths trunk-"
"You're already settled in?" I asked, somewhat surprised.
"Well, when we found out you were 'hurt'. well, sort of. we came over immediately (into the Knight Bus, mind you!) and our parents just flooed our things over; Ron's parents got us connected temporarily," she explained.
"Well, I'll be right back with some clothes, why don't you take a walk down the kitchens to stretch your legs and get a little breakfast?" she suggested.
"That sound s like a very good idea, I'm starving!" I said, looking at my stomach, which ironically enough rumbled right on cue.
"I'll bet, you were unconscious for three days." she said, a hint of the despairing emotions that she had obviously felt during my 'mini-coma' shining in her eyes. "I'm so glad you're alright!" With that, she briefly embraced me then set off purposefully through the door. Once the door had clicked shut, I reached over and hesitantly peeked inside the bag she left me.
"Oh dear Lord." I murmured, catching sight of an assortment of pads and other feminine products, "What did I ever do?!"
Oh, and a shout out to Sly4 for being my first reviewer! Go you AND me! *giggles insanely*
Chapter 2: The New Harry
"Harry, why don't you sue the name Jamie Evans? It's a pretty neutral name, and you won't have a problem remembering it as it's a combination of your parents names," Hermione supplied eagerly.
Ron looked over at me and said under his breath "Jamie," as if testing it out, then nodded, saying, "I like it, it suits you, and it's not a big stretch.
After a moment of thought, I assented. Slowly, we pieced together my personal history: Born a half-blood in rural England, I moved all over to accommodate my Muggle father, who was paranoid that someone would harm my mother. At the age of three, both parents were killed in a car accident (thanks are in order to Vernon Dursley), which landed me in a London foster home of a married witch and wizard, who home-schooled me. Last summer they both died in a an unfortunate attack by Death Eaters on a mall complex, which resulted in leaving me, at age 18, to decide my own future. Dumbledore kindly took me in and decided to let me finish my education there.
"Right, then, 'Jamie,' you'd better get some sleep or else Madam Pomfrey will have my head for a bedpan," Dumbledore said jovially, standing up to leave.
"Thank you, Professor. By the way, how long until term starts?" I asked.
"About a week, why?"
"I can just stay here, correct?"
"Of course, Jamie."
"Thank you sir."
Madam Pomfrey entered the room at that moment and shooed everyone else out, then handed me a dreamless sleep potion. As the warm liquid slid down my throat, all blurred to nothingness and sleep became my refuge.
"Jamie?. Jamie. Jamie, wake up!"
"Hmmm?" I asked, rolling over.
"Wake up Jamie, I don't think you want to discuss this with Ton around, so we have to do this now, while he's sleeping!" Hermione whispered urgently, pulling lightly on my arm.
"Mmm." I said, pulling the pillow over my head.
"Come on, there are some things I need to tell you." she trailed off.
"Whaaat?" I whined, turning onto my back and staring sullenly as possible in the morning.
"Well, I assume you don't remember much about female anatomy?" she asked, slightly flushing.
"Um." I said, blushing myself.
"Alright, let's get this over with." she said, digging around in her bag. She pulled out a tape measure and began to measure different aspects of my body (hips, bust, waist) while saying, "Well, you're going to need new clothes, and yes, bras as well, sorry, and I'll have to teach you how to act more like a girl0"
"I don't want to be all bloody girly!"
"No, just you have improve your posture and gait, we can't have you stomping around everywhere-'
"I don't stomp!"
"Well, maybe not stomp but is certainly is too. ungainly for any girl. Oh, and you'll need to know this sooner or later, sooner is better, so you'll be prepared."
"What?"
"A. - Guys will hit on you-"
"WHAT?!"
"Hey, you're a pretty innocent girl until you establish your reputation and personality to the school at large. Oh, and B. - You'll most likely have a period."\
". Are you serious? PMS and everything?"
"Well, every girl copes differently, although since you're not used to any of this, it may hit you harder. Maybe you'll be lucky enough to not have bad cramps, but."
"Cramps?"
"They're like a bad stomachache, you'll know it when you feel it. Here's a bag of some essentials you'll need soon which I didn't think you'd particularly want to buy. Oh yes, how are you feeling?" Hermione asked with a gleam in her eye, one that I knew didn't bode well.
"Better. why?" I asked hesitantly, afraid of the answer.
"Well, we need to go buy you some clothes, of course!" she said, her eyes lighting up. in the shape of dollar sings, or hearts? . Hmm.
"I suppose you're right and I can tell there's not talking you out of it, so I guess we can."
"Great! I'll just lend you some of my clothes until you get your own- :
"Not underwear, right?"
"No, you can just wear yours until we get you some girl underwear," she replied, rolling her eyes.
"You don't mind loaning my some clothes?" I asked hesitantly.
"Of course not! All girls loan each other clothing! Which is why we'll have to burn all your old clothes-"
"What?!"
"Settle down! I just meant the obvious stuff that girls shouldn't own. you can keep certain sweaters and stuff."
"Oh joy."
"Oh, cheer up! It's not that bad."
I glared at her vehemently, causing her to duck her head guiltily.
"Anyways, are we taking Ron?" Hermione asked after an awkward moment.
I thought for a moment and decided against it, telling her so. His moral support would have been nice, but it might be somewhat embarrassing and tedious for him to go clothes shopping with 'two girls,' however.
"I thought you'd say that, so I left a message on his cloths trunk-"
"You're already settled in?" I asked, somewhat surprised.
"Well, when we found out you were 'hurt'. well, sort of. we came over immediately (into the Knight Bus, mind you!) and our parents just flooed our things over; Ron's parents got us connected temporarily," she explained.
"Well, I'll be right back with some clothes, why don't you take a walk down the kitchens to stretch your legs and get a little breakfast?" she suggested.
"That sound s like a very good idea, I'm starving!" I said, looking at my stomach, which ironically enough rumbled right on cue.
"I'll bet, you were unconscious for three days." she said, a hint of the despairing emotions that she had obviously felt during my 'mini-coma' shining in her eyes. "I'm so glad you're alright!" With that, she briefly embraced me then set off purposefully through the door. Once the door had clicked shut, I reached over and hesitantly peeked inside the bag she left me.
"Oh dear Lord." I murmured, catching sight of an assortment of pads and other feminine products, "What did I ever do?!"