Pissing Contest

She disappeared after the little concert. Kitty and Jubilee thought she was off somewhere getting lucky, so they covered for her. When Scott and Jean did bed checks they said she was in the bathroom, but, of course, she wasn't. Fortunately, they didn't question it. Rogue always obeyed the rules.

"She's with Remy, I know it," Kitty said giggling.

"No, she's with Logan," Jubilee said firmly.

"Did you see her leave?" Kitty asked.

"No, did you?" Jubilee asked.

"No."

"Hmmm," Jubilee said.

Rogue was in shock. She had just been flirting, playing, but they were serious. They were insane. She couldn't be touched. The smallest mistake could kill. That was the sort of detail that would ruin any romantic relationship she would ever attempt to have. She liked the flirting, and stirring things up with her pranks, but she couldn't allow herself to get involved. She was a Rogue. Letting herself fall for one of those two would be so easy. But which one? How do you choose between two kinds of heaven? And how could she handle the inevitable break up? They were both very sensual men, who would not be content with her mutation. Once the chase was over, she would no longer hold their interest. Better to just not go there. It was time to stop the pranks. Someone was going to get hurt. She knew it was going to be her.

She had to get out of there. If she went to her room, they could find her. She went for a walk instead. It had been late, past curfew, when she started thinking about going inside, but she saw the professor's car coming up the driveway. She couldn't get past two telepaths so she decided to just go down to the boathouse. When Logan first left, she used to go there to hide out when she needed to be alone. Tonight, she definitely needed to be alone.

He heard the knocking, though it was very quiet, before the scent registered. It was the noisy yellow one that always hung around Marie. She was annoying, but knew when to leave him alone. He could smell her nerves and sudden panic set in. Something must be wrong. He leapt off the bed and opened the door.

"What?" he asked.

"Um, Rogue needs to get to class in ten minutes or Mr. Summers is going to get suspicious," Jubilee said quietly, trying to look past him.

"You think she's here?" he asked with a shocked expression.

"Um, no…" she tried to cover, but it was too late.

"She didn't sleep in her room last night?" he asked harshly.

"I gotta go," Jubilee said and ran for her life. I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead.

Logan stormed down the hall to the Cajun's room and kicked the door in. Snikt! "Where is she?" he demanded.

Remy pulled the pillow out from under his throbbing head and covered his eyes with it. "Remy don't know what you're talking about. Dis Cajun boy been suffering through the aftermath of Southern Comfort for hours," he said weakly. "Let a guy suffer in peace."

Logan could smell the whisky, and the putrid scent of vomit in the room. He couldn't smell a trace of Marie. Good. He stalked out without another word. Where was she?

Rogue snuck in just as classes started. She silently slipped into her room and got in the shower. She was sore from sleeping on that bench in the boat. She had to hurry and dress before someone came to check on her. Kitty and Jubes would probably say she was sick or something, so she could show up late. She combed out her damp hair and pulled it into a ponytail, leaving her platinum streaks to hang in a loose frame around her face. When she opened the door, he was waiting.

"Hi, Logan. Can't talk, I'm late," she said casually and tried to step past him, but he blocked her.

"Mornin Darlin," he said in a dangerously quiet tone. "How'd ya sleep? Or should I ask where'd ya sleep?"

Uh-oh. "Logan, uh…Chemistry 101, gotta run," she said quickly and pulled a fake-and-run move that would have done any quarterback proud. She took off to class and Logan stood swearing.

Lunch was brutal. Scott had dragged Remy out of his room and forced him to go to all his training sessions. He picked at his food idly until he saw Logan. Then he straightened up and put a brave face on the hangover from hell. He never expected Logan to sit by him.

"Hi, Gumbo," he said in a loud and grating tone. "How's it goin?"

Remy knew he was doing it on purpose just to get back at him. He tried to think of something cute to say but came up dry. "Shut up, old man."

"Too much comfort?" Logan teased harshly.

"Not enough," Remy said meaningfully.

"She's not for you, Cajun," Logan said just loud enough for him to hear.

"You're not for her," Remy answered back quickly.

"Boy, you ain't man enough…" Logan started.

"Try me, old man," Remy said as anger and adrenaline dulled the pain of his hangover.

"I'll mop the goddamn floor with you," Logan said confidently. "Meet me in the danger room, in ten minutes."

"Count on it," Remy said.

"Good."

"Fine."

They thought they were being quiet, but everyone saw the argument and knew it for what it was, a pissing contest. Jubilee, Rogue and Kitty had been standing there just long enough to see the pathetic macho display.

Rogue couldn't believe they were arguing about her. Neither of them had a claim on her, but they acted like they did. It was starting to tick her off.

Jubilee just smiled and pulled a ruler out of her folder. She marched right up to the table and tossed it in front of the two men without a word and started to walk away.

"What's this?" Logan asked in bewilderment.

Jubilee turned and looked at the two confused men and gave them an innocent look. "You're obviously doing a lot of measuring there, I thought that would help you guys determine which was bigger," she said flatly and the three girls walked away. No one could believe they'd kept straight faces. Everyone was smirking at that comment.

"Sorry, kid," Logan called after her with a wicked smile. "You'll have to get me a yardstick."

Remy was going to say the same thing, but Logan had been faster. Oh, hell. Blame it on the hangover.

The entire room broke into uncontrollable laughter.

Rogue just blushed and kept walking.