Love
Written by: HoshiHikari4ever
ADVANCE \d 5Disclaimer: I do not own Fy. I wish I did.
Parings: H/M
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Chapter 10
He silently slipped inside his chamber, without being noticed by anyone. As quickly as possible he changed his clothes, so that now he wore white from top to bottom. Yes, white was appropriate, white that represented death, white that represented his loss, his loss of Miaka.
Hotohori stared at his reflection. He was pale, pale in a way that he looked sick. No he wasn't sick, as a matter of fact, he had fully recovered from the arrow that wounded his body. Then why, why, did he feel so terrible, so terribly sick? He abruptly stood up, as something came through his mind. In haste, he left his room.
***
He closed the door to the shrine, making sure it was lock up. Turning around, he kneeled before the statue of the Great Beast-God of the South, Konan's Protector and Guardian, Suzaku.
"Suzaku, I've failed you. I've failed the whole empire. I've failed as emperor, as Seishi. I've failed Miaka." His voice choked at the mention of his beloved. Flashes of the past zoomed through him once more. "Please forgive me Suzaku. Please forgive me for the crime I've committed." He bowed low towards the statue, keeping his gaze low, not daring to look directly at him.
"Miaka…." His thoughts returned to her once more. Hotohori's heart ached with pain as he thought of her. He could not express his pain and sorrow. All he could do was blame himself. "Miaka…." He called her name. As he called, the truth slowly hit him, he was never going to see her again. No matter how hard he called her, no matter what he did, Miaka would not return.
"Why, oh why Suzaku, why did I attack Nagako when you were in his hands. Why, why couldn't I just remain calm, why oh why…."? He could answer that question easily.
Miaka I love you. That is why. It all comes down to this. I love you. I had to do something. I couldn't stand it. I had to get you back. Please understand, I didn't mean to hurt you at all. I didn't mean to kill you it was an accident.
Tears rolled down his cheeks. For the first time, since Miaka's death, he cried feely. The pain, the sorrow, and all the emotions in between could not be hold down any longer.
Still the feeling did not leave him. Anger rushed through him as he blamed himself.
It's my entire fault. Miaka I killed you. It's my fault that you died. I killed you; I killed my past, present and future. You were everything to me; you were the reason of my existence.
He let that last thought linger. Miaka was dead; there was no way to bring back the dead. There was no way to reverse the past. He looked for something sharp. "I'll die, if that is the only way to seek your forgiveness." His hands came to his side, and he felt his sword. He pulled it out. Hotohori looked bow towards Suzaku three more times, before turning his back to it.
He pointed his sword at his chest, closing his eyes.
Easy, now, one swift movement and it'll all be over. Then I'll see you again, Miaka. In the afterlife, we shall meet again.
The sword moved closer. Somehow, he couldn't do it. Couldn't bring himself to commit suicide. Something, was nagging him, bugging him, preventing him from striking.
What is it? Why am I hesitating? I never did before. Why now. What is it, Suzaku, why, why can't I just end my life, as Miaka tried to before? I'm not a coward, I'm not afraid of anything, not even death. Then why, why am I chickening out now?
He could feel that something was wrong. Somehow he felt that what he was about to do was wrong. Something told him that he would regret it forever. Something held him back. He didn't know what. All he knew was he needed to move on, death was not the answer.
Death is the answer. It's the only way to end this. The only way there is now.
He opened his eyes, frustrated, unable to decide what to do. He stared at his sword. It was then that he noticed it, a reflection of some sort. It seemed to have some sort of writing on it. Turning around he stared back at the statue of Suzaku. He studied it carefully, taking in the slightest detail. There was nothing special. He looked above it, nothing special either. Looking below it, noticed a table with eight items. He was sure that it wasn't there before. Standing up, he walked towards it.
In the center was a scroll. He picked it up eyes widening. It was the Suzaku's scroll.
Isn't this in Kuto though. Didn't Miaka lose it? Yes, she did. Then why, why is it here, how did it get here?
His question was immediately answered. The scroll glowed red, and disappeared. "No!" Hotohori yelled. It disappeared.
Next to the place where the scroll use to be, was a long sword. He could tell it wasn't normal, infused with some sort of magical power; a holy sword by the looks of it. He did not pick it up, just stared at it's magnificent beauty.
On the other side of the scroll's spot was a long staff, and a medicine carrier. "Chirichi, Mitsukake…." He picked up the two, and once again, watched it disappear before him. He tried to grasp on, but was unsuccessful.
Then he looked next to the sword, and found a tessen, and another scroll. He hesitated, before picking them up. "Tasuki, Chiriko…." He held them tightly, afraid that these two were going to disappear. It did. Hotohori let out a sigh. He stared at the last two objects, hatred and anger suddenly erupted from him.
"How dare they! How dare they consider themselves Suzaku's Seishi's!" he pointed at two sets of wristbands. "Those two traitors! They are unworthy of the Mightily God." He picked up, the two sets, and threw them onto the floor. However, it never landed, for once again it disappeared.
The emperor looked back, seeing only the holy sword was left. Next two it was a piece of paper. "Now you know your path. Use this wisely, to vanquish my foes, defeat Seiryuu and save them all…." Hotohori stared at the note, not understanding any of it. He read it over a few more times, staring back and forth between Suzaku and the note. Finally he understood it.
That's it! The weapons they represent each Seishi. Suzaku's scroll represents Miaka. Miaka's dead, so it disappeared, never again to be retrieve, lost in the hands of the enemy. Chirichi and Mitsukake captured by Nagako, forever doomed as prisoners. Tasuki and Chiriko's meant disaster will fall, disaster will come, one that no one would be able to stand a chance against. Then Nuriko, Tamahome, those two, better not come back. I'll kill them I swear. The only reason Miaka is dead is because of them, not me. If they never betrayed me, then none of this would have happened. They are the reason that Suzaku can never be summoned.
With that thought in mind, he knew exactly what he needed to do. He was going to kill Nuriko and Tamahome, alone with the enemies. He was going to retrieve the two-captured Seishi, especially Chichiri since it was he who put him as temporary emperor. It surprised him, in the very least that the empire did not fall yet, that he was still able to be inside the shrine and sob his feelings out. He laughed silently. He was going to have revenge, revenge for Miaka, for his friends, his companions, his empire, and for himself.
Slowly he reached out, and grabbed the holy sword. It was perfect, made to perfection in every way. He swung it a few times and found it very fit indeed. If he hadn't know better, he would have though that this sword was especially made for him, for his use only, made by Taiitsukun or Suzaku himself. Hotohori held the sword respectfully, bowed to his God, and then left the Shrine.
* * *
"Heiki!" a voice called out to him. Hotohori stopped seeing that his advisors had spotted him. The group came over, bowing low to the ground. Hotohori nodded, and they all rose.
"Heiki, when did you come back. You left without a sound, without a trace…we were all worried about you." The head advisor spoke. "Lord Nuriko went out….." "Nuriko!" Anger blazed inside of him.
How dare he show his face here. How dare he step foot in this palace.
"Yes, he, he went out to look for sire, with a small group of troops…" "Bastard…." Hotohori mumble. The advisors exchanged looks, sensing that the emperor was extremely angry at him. "Where is he? Where is Nuriko now?" he ask, shaking the sword slightly. "Back, came back two days ago…." "Bring him to see us NOW!!!!" No one moved. "We said NOW!!!" he swung his sword at the thin air before him. Without another glance at the emperor, the group left.
* * *
Nuriko stared out at the pond. Just two weeks ago, he and Miaka had been sitting here, talking, before Tamahome attacked. Now, he realized it was his fault, his fault that Hotohori was missing.
Baka! If I had stopped Tamahome in the first place, Miaka wouldn't be injured. Then she wouldn't have to have gone through all that pain. Hotohori-sama, he wouldn't be missing all this time.
He had been sent out to search for Hotohori, Tasuki, and Chiriko, but no such luck, he couldn't find them anywhere.
Hotohori-sama where are you?
"Lord Nuriko…." "Yes," he stood up surprised that guards surrounded him. "Yes," he asked skeptically at the head advisor. "Will you please come quietly with us…." He paused, "the emperor requested to see you." "Why, Come with you, I didn't do anything wrong…Hey wait, did you say Hotohori-sama was back and wanted to see me?" They nodded. "Come now, otherwise, we'll force you to…" Nuriko glanced at the spears that were pointed towards him. "Alright…." He mumbled as he was escorted to see the emperor.
What's wrong with Hotohori anyways? Why does he need to escort me away like this. Does he still have a grudge against me; after all I did, after risking my life for them.
* * *
Hotohori sat inpaiently on the throne. There was no need to explain, no need to forgive. He was going to execute Nuriko here and now. Nothing he could do, nothing he could say that would prevent the sentence that Hotohori had decided on.
* * *
Nuriko entered the throne room alone, surprised that only Hotohori sat there. No one else was inside. He studied the emperor, noticing that fire blazed in his eyes, notice the solemn atmosphere created by his white outfit. In his right hand was a sword, it's shaft nowhere to be seen.
* * *
How dare he! How can he walk in so casually, so innocent looking. How can what happened, have no effect on him at all. How can Miaka's death, betraying your own emperor, your own empire, betraying the God that protected you all along have no effect on you at all? Nuriko, what is it, how did you change so quickly. How could you do this to me, how could you do this to Miaka.
Nuriko did a bow, so formal, that nothing seemed to be wrong. "Sire, I'm glad to see, you've returned unharmed." Hotohori only grunted. What he added next made Hotohori even angrier. "Did someone die…"
"Did someone die?" he reapeated, mocking Nuriko. "Don't play dumb with us. We know very well, that you know perfectly well, who we are addressing to."
We and us? When did he start using that towards the Seishi. What were these accusations.
This confused Nuriko. "Well, I don't, even if someone did die, it has nothing to do with me." "NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU? HOW COULD YOU SAY THAT! AFTER ALL, YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR CAUSING HER DEATH! AM I CORRECT? SHE DIED BECAUSE OF YOU!" Nuriko took a few steps back. He didn't like the way things were going. For some reason the emperor was extremely angry with him, for what reason, he did not know. He was clueless of everything that was happening.
Hotohori stood up, griping his sword. "DO YOU DENY BEING WITH MIAKA WHEN TAMAHOME ATTACKED." "No" "MIAKA WAS INJURED, BUT YOU DID NOT SEEK HELP, INSTEAD YOU FOLLOWED HIM." "yes…"
So this is what it is, right. He's blaming me for everything that happened. Yes I did do all the stuff that he mentioned, but I am innocent. I never killed a single sole.
"THEN THAT NIGHT, THAT FATEFUL NIGHT, YOU, AND TAMAHOME WATCHED AS I WAS HEAVILY WOUNDED. YOU DI D NOT DO ANYTHING, BUT WATCH THE DUEL BETWEEN ME AND NAGAKO." "yes…but that's not true…I did do some….."
This was it; the emperor had heard a confirmation of the events. That was all he needed to know. He didn't need explanations, more lies to add on. "There you have it. For the crimes you have committed, we sentence you to death!" Without another word, the emperor suddenly rushed forward. Before he knew it, Nuriko saw the sword swing down from the top of his head.
Red light suddenly flickered above Nuriko's head. The sword hit something hard, and Nuriko glowed brightly red. "How dare you, just because you have Suzaku's protection, it doesn't mean we won't kill you." Hotohori whispered angrily.
"That would be me no da." The red light disappeared. Chirichi's smiling face stared into his own. The staff had repelled the sword.
"You got to be more careful, at where you swing that sword of yours sire, no da. If that hit Nuriko, you would've killed him for sure no da." "Chi…Chirichi…." He stammered. The monk looks at him up and down. "How did you escape? How did you come back out alive…." "Ah, I never left, never set foot in Kuto, stayed here as you ordered me to…." Hotohori looked sideways at the monk. "But, but…I saw it with my own eyes, I heard it myself, Nagako said so himself…." The monk smiled. "Hai, so I heard already, from Tasuki and Chriko. They told me stories of illusions that you have had." He surveyed the emperor. "Sometimes, it is best to trust in ourselves, not information that comes form the outside world…." He paused. "Miaka is alive no da…." "A…. alive, she's alive…Miaka, Miaka's alive…"
At that moment a figure ran up to him, and buried herself in his chest. The figure was crying hard. Hotohori looked down, and gave a squeal of joy. Indeed, in his hands held his beloved Miaka. Behind her, stood, Tasuki, Mitsukake, and Chiriko, all smiling at him.
Hotohori looked at the group, confused but happy all the same. He did not understand anything that had happened, but it did not matter, Miaka was alive. Miaka , his beloved was not dead.
"Miaka, you're not dead, you're not dead…." That was all he could manage to say. Miaka only murmured his name, over and over again. Finally the two released each other, both realizing that this was not the appropriate time for a reunion. That could be done later, when they would be alone, in his private chamber. Right now was the time for explanations, explanations for everything that he thought had occurred.
Hotohori sat back on the throne, leaning back, so that he was in a comfortable position. He glanced at everyone, pausing at Nuriko, who confused him the most. "Nuriko, we placed you in a terrible situation. We made our decision without all the information needed. We apologize for our harshness, accusing you of a crime you did not commit. Please forgive us…." Nuriko only nodded, unable to decide what to say or do.
"Now, I am confused." Hotohori began. "How, why, what happened. Was everything that I believed in just an illusion." "Hai…" The emperor looked at Nuriko, giving him the explain-everything-that-happened-and-don't-think-about-keeping-anything-a-secrect look. Nuriko nodded, and began to tell his side of the story.
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