Part 5: Add Flour And Stir To Thicken The Plot.
Hi, this is the story again. In case you haven't noticed, the Author is a male. Yet, I'm female. Because of this fact I want to say straight out that all of this part is not my fault. It is the MALE'S FAULT. Ladies, we all know that this is not an accurate representation of PMS. That's our story and we're sticking to it. Now, on to the Author truly goes and alienates his fans.
"Men suck."
"They really suck."
"They're only good for a few things, and there are mechanical tools that can take their place."
*silence*
"I meant for lifting and moving things. Not that, I don't have an adequate comparison."
"Seeing who you date I understand the inadequacies you are encountering."
"That's so mean! The loathsome scum deserves it though."
"I can't believe they ran out on us. And they even mentioned PMS as the reason! We should kill them."
"No, death is too good. We give my mom a newspaper and let her attack."
"Mind warp them into kissing light sockets."
"Complain about how he has a better rack than me."
"Grab him and cuddle him."
"Isabel! We're male bashing here, no drooling."
"But he's so cute. And he danced for me, and he has those adorable ears."
"A moment ago you wanted to kill."
"I changed my mind. Now I want to cuddle."
"Me too, he does have some good qualities."
"His rack isn't that much bigger."
"NO, we are not letting our bodies decide we let them survive. They ran out, they must pay."
"But Maria…"
"NO! First we hurt them, then we make them crawl back to us, then we cuddle. After we take them shopping."
"Ohhhhh, that's cruel."
"Exactly."
"Is there more chocolate ice cream?"
"And fudge?"
"Can I just have an IV drip of chocolate?"
"Okay, let's go get some more chocolate."
Hi, story here. This is the Author's fault, you all encouraged him. Are you happy now? Anyway, segue to, and I'm quoting the Author here, "after the hormonally insane women have been heavily dosed with chocolate". So, that's where we are. I can't believe I have to be this story, I could have been a nice Spike/Angelus fic by Saber Shadowkitten, but nooooooo, I just had to come here. What will my Applications think… Oh, sorry, back to the story and such.
The now sated hormonally infused foursome sat around basking in the afterglow of se.. sorry, chocolate. If it were sex that would be a really different fic, though, that might not be a bad one to write. Anyway. Having eaten enough chocolate to kill most men, they were now slightly more sane (figuratively speaking since they are women).
WHOA, please direct all hate mail to Drake at [Address Removed Because Of Frightening Repsonse By Women] if you wish I can give you his home address for mail bombs. Or male bombs.
Tess, having killed several chocolate Easter bunnies by boiling them in honor of Kyle and then eating them with chili pepper, was now ready to have a brilliant idea despite her hair color. (Again, send all hate mail to Drake.) Sitting up swiftly and clutching a flyer for a Nevada strip club which found it's way to her through a plot hole (a.k.a. the Author is feeling lazy). Waking the others from their chocolate induced euphoria she showed them the flyer.
"The guys ran off to have fun, so why don't we go have our own kind of fun? I missed Alex stripping, so why don't we go see some real men stripping?"
"I don't know, you think our parents will let us go?" Liz didn't want to go, she wanted to stay at home and do that Pining Soulmate thing laced heavily with PMS driven homicidal tendencies.
"They let the guys go, they better let us. If not I'll scream double standard." Isabel was now in the Angry PMS mode, not the Cuddle PMS mode.
"I'm sure my mom will let me go. As long as it's not with Michael or any other hormonal males, she'll let me have free reign."
Skipping past them all working it out, since, you know, if they didn't this part would be pointless, they are now on the road. And, since they, unlike the guys, will stop and ask for directions, they'll be there in time for the guys show where it took the guys days to get there.
"Now, you all have singles to shove in their g-strings, right?" Maria was ready. They all were. They were going to get a show. They just didn't know how good of one yet.
"Tess, you think you could mind warp the strippers into taking off the thongs too?"
"LIZ! I'm impressed, and of course I can. We are going to see some sights tonight. We'll show the guys, who needs them, we can have lots of fun without them."
And the Author cackled with glee. Then, realizing he was about to post the story and how he painted PMS and the girls, decided to hide someplace safe as soon as he posts.
Hi, this is the story again. In case you haven't noticed, the Author is a male. Yet, I'm female. Because of this fact I want to say straight out that all of this part is not my fault. It is the MALE'S FAULT. Ladies, we all know that this is not an accurate representation of PMS. That's our story and we're sticking to it. Now, on to the Author truly goes and alienates his fans.
"Men suck."
"They really suck."
"They're only good for a few things, and there are mechanical tools that can take their place."
*silence*
"I meant for lifting and moving things. Not that, I don't have an adequate comparison."
"Seeing who you date I understand the inadequacies you are encountering."
"That's so mean! The loathsome scum deserves it though."
"I can't believe they ran out on us. And they even mentioned PMS as the reason! We should kill them."
"No, death is too good. We give my mom a newspaper and let her attack."
"Mind warp them into kissing light sockets."
"Complain about how he has a better rack than me."
"Grab him and cuddle him."
"Isabel! We're male bashing here, no drooling."
"But he's so cute. And he danced for me, and he has those adorable ears."
"A moment ago you wanted to kill."
"I changed my mind. Now I want to cuddle."
"Me too, he does have some good qualities."
"His rack isn't that much bigger."
"NO, we are not letting our bodies decide we let them survive. They ran out, they must pay."
"But Maria…"
"NO! First we hurt them, then we make them crawl back to us, then we cuddle. After we take them shopping."
"Ohhhhh, that's cruel."
"Exactly."
"Is there more chocolate ice cream?"
"And fudge?"
"Can I just have an IV drip of chocolate?"
"Okay, let's go get some more chocolate."
Hi, story here. This is the Author's fault, you all encouraged him. Are you happy now? Anyway, segue to, and I'm quoting the Author here, "after the hormonally insane women have been heavily dosed with chocolate". So, that's where we are. I can't believe I have to be this story, I could have been a nice Spike/Angelus fic by Saber Shadowkitten, but nooooooo, I just had to come here. What will my Applications think… Oh, sorry, back to the story and such.
The now sated hormonally infused foursome sat around basking in the afterglow of se.. sorry, chocolate. If it were sex that would be a really different fic, though, that might not be a bad one to write. Anyway. Having eaten enough chocolate to kill most men, they were now slightly more sane (figuratively speaking since they are women).
WHOA, please direct all hate mail to Drake at [Address Removed Because Of Frightening Repsonse By Women] if you wish I can give you his home address for mail bombs. Or male bombs.
Tess, having killed several chocolate Easter bunnies by boiling them in honor of Kyle and then eating them with chili pepper, was now ready to have a brilliant idea despite her hair color. (Again, send all hate mail to Drake.) Sitting up swiftly and clutching a flyer for a Nevada strip club which found it's way to her through a plot hole (a.k.a. the Author is feeling lazy). Waking the others from their chocolate induced euphoria she showed them the flyer.
"The guys ran off to have fun, so why don't we go have our own kind of fun? I missed Alex stripping, so why don't we go see some real men stripping?"
"I don't know, you think our parents will let us go?" Liz didn't want to go, she wanted to stay at home and do that Pining Soulmate thing laced heavily with PMS driven homicidal tendencies.
"They let the guys go, they better let us. If not I'll scream double standard." Isabel was now in the Angry PMS mode, not the Cuddle PMS mode.
"I'm sure my mom will let me go. As long as it's not with Michael or any other hormonal males, she'll let me have free reign."
Skipping past them all working it out, since, you know, if they didn't this part would be pointless, they are now on the road. And, since they, unlike the guys, will stop and ask for directions, they'll be there in time for the guys show where it took the guys days to get there.
"Now, you all have singles to shove in their g-strings, right?" Maria was ready. They all were. They were going to get a show. They just didn't know how good of one yet.
"Tess, you think you could mind warp the strippers into taking off the thongs too?"
"LIZ! I'm impressed, and of course I can. We are going to see some sights tonight. We'll show the guys, who needs them, we can have lots of fun without them."
And the Author cackled with glee. Then, realizing he was about to post the story and how he painted PMS and the girls, decided to hide someplace safe as soon as he posts.