Ranma & Kaneda
By Ron Dow75
From an idea by James M. Zema,
Unauthorized, but allowed.
02: Ranma's Girl Problem
Kaneda dropped his do-gi pants in the laundry
basket. He paused to look at the familiar door that
had taunted him all of his life. Everybody else
could take hot soaks in the furo/tub, but not him.
He had to take cold showers. If he didn't, he would
be changed into a girl the minute he touched hot
water.
But he was raised to be a guy, the man who would
inherit the Tendou legacy and property. Every time
he did not live up to his dad's expectations, Dad
went weird. Every time his sister Nabiki discovered
him as a girl, she would make comments that made him
feel little. But worse, every time Kasumi found him
as a girl, she would treat him as if he WERE a girl!
By the time he was old enough to think there might
be some benefits to his problem, he'd met his
friends. Hiroshi and Daisuke made it clear what you
were supposed to do with a girl's body. Meanwhile
there were girls around him having a variety of
female problems. His pubescent doubts and anxieties
were multiplied. That's when he stopped taking hot
baths altogether.
Kaneda the heir to the Tendou School of Anything-
Goes Martials Arts lost his nerve.
But now the moment of truth had arrived. Hot water
made him a girl because he really was....
His headache went from dull to throbbing! He'd had
it since the girl Ranma'd socked him and he whacked
his head on the floor of the dojo. It was different
from anything he'd felt before.
Little did he suspect he then he was but the first
of a number of people who would receive the
"Juusenkyo Blow to the Soul".
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Nabiki, then the new girl knelt down at the living
room table, and waited across from each other for
the big explosion from the bathroom.
Kasumi offered, "I'll go fill the kettle again and
we can have tea."
The little Ranma watch the older sister get the
teakettle from where Nabiki'd left it, and leave for
the kitchen. "Is she serious?"
Nabiki said, "Try oblivious. Daddy doesn't want to
deal with Kaneda's change, so Kasumi doesn't want
to, either."
Ranma got the creeps, "So, you mean Kaneda's been
free to play her sick games all a her life?!"
Big sister slapped her hand down on the table, "Try
the other way around, Saotome! Whatever else Kaneda
may be, he has family feeling. He knows it how
upsets everybody and the neighbors when he changes."
Then she leaned forward to level her eye at the
strange girl making insinuations. "Kaneda does NOT
become a girl out of choice." Nabiki realized she
hadn't readjusted how SHE thought of her little
'brother', yet.
"H, hel, hello," a voice at the door said.
Ranma looked, and said to the older sister, "Make
that past tense."
Standing in a blue terrycloth bathrobe was a 5'4"
girl with long black hair. Beyond that Ranma was in
no mood to judge.
Nabiki looked, and commented, "You haven't changed a
bit since the last time I teased you, Kane-chan."
Kane-chan frowned, "Thanks for reminding of another
reason I don't like having this body."
Though remaining sympathetic, Nabiki couldn't resist
saying, "Once you get used to being a girl, I can
always tease you by turning you into a guy."
Kane-chan came over to the table, "You don't tease
Kasumi!"
Nabiki, still smiling said, "I guess it's just more
fun to kid your kid brother."
It was Ranma's turn to level her eyes, " ' Sounds
like you're jealous."
Nabiki give her a bemused look, "Me? Jealous?"
Kane-chan fell to her knees on the side between
them, "Oh, great! If a girl who's been a girl all of
her life thinks it's better to be a guy, why do I
want to be a girl?"
Nabiki said to her sibling, but putting an edge to
it for Ranma, "I didn't say I didn't like being a
girl. Look what's suggesting it!"
Kane-chan bowed her head towards her breasts.
"Someone who knows what it's like to be both."
Ranma said, "You got that right! Bein' a girl
sucks!"
Kane-chan flinched at the unfortunate choice of
word. Ranma didn't notice the implications, but,
then, he didn't have friends like Hiroshi and
Daisuke.
Big sister said, "You're NOT helping, Saotome. You
KNOW I don't just have Kaneda I can tease now."
Ranma thumbed her fist towards herself, "Try it, and
you'll wish you hadn't!"
Nabiki said, "Is that a challenge?"
Kane-chan cried, "Stop it!! Isn't there enough
conflict going on inside me, without having to hear
it outside!?!" She was fighting to keep from crying.
She had sworn never to cry like... Dad.
To Ranma it was just like a girl. She snorted. "I
had expected more rage and furry at findin' out you
weren't a guy."
Kane-chan rested her forearms on the table, "I
always knew I could change into a girl. I just
didn't know I was a girl." She slumped over the
table. She felt her breasts try to dangle within her
robe. {Do girls get used to the feeling?}
Kasumi appeared at the door, "I thought I heard
company. The tea will only be a few minutes more.
But why don't you invite the girl to dinner. We'll
have more than enough, seeing as Father and his old
friend seem to have decided to dine out together.
They have SO much to catch up on."
Ranma leaned her weight on an arm while she studied
the oldest sister. "No reality check there." The to
her, "Aren't you interested in WHO this girl is?
That WOULD be the polite thing to ask."
Kasumi started to fidget. "Well...yes. That WOULD be
the proper amenity when meeting a new person..." She
was beginning to perspire. "I try to be the proper
hostess. I don't know where..."
Her back to her motherly sister, Kane-chan could
hear how uncomfortable she was. She was being forced
to face something she had been trying to avoid all
of her life, and it tore Kane-chan up inside, too.
Nabiki hissed at Ranma, "That WASN'T a smart move,
martial artist!"
Ranma shot back at her, "It ain't gonna keep naggin'
at her WHY there's a strange girl in her house that
isn't going away?"
Nabiki saw Ranma was, unfortunately, right. Kaneda
the girl would not be going away as before. To learn
to be a girl, he--she(!) had to remain a girl.
She took a deep breath, and faced the sister still
stuck in a dither, "Kasumi, this i...uh, Akane."
Ranma rolled her big blue eyes. She couldn't come up
with a more original name? A-Kane-d-A, really!
Immediately, Kasumi was back to her normal self,
"Akane! Such a nice name for a girl."
Kane-chan took her head off the table to look at the
one who liked to think she was the smart one. "
"Akane"??" Her skin crawled. Kaneda was a shield
that kept her from fully recognizing the femaleness
threatening to overwhelm her.
Nabiki said, "Trust me." She then continued for the
benefit of Kasumi, "Akane Saotome."
Ranma leaped to her feet, "What!?!"
Kane-chan leaped to her feet, "I WAS thinking it
would be Ranma TENDOU!" Obviously he WASN'T ready to
admit which was the girl.
Nabiki put her right arm on the table, and tried to
stare the two down, "Akane is Ranma-kun's kissing
cousin. She can marry HIM." SHE certainly didn't
want him!
Ranma-kun stomped her bare foot on the table, "I
don't want to be ANYbody's fiancee!!"
Kane-chan blinked at her sister. "Why would I want
to marry a guy?"
Nabiki turned to Kane-chan, "Symmetry. Ranma-chan
can still be the fiancee of Kaneda."
She added, "And everything would be legal. Almost."
All they needed was a fake birth certificate.
Ranma lifted the table up, "If I don't want a girl..."
There was something about this guy-girl that got on
his last nerve! He flipped the table behind her and
strode to center stage. She DEMANDED their
attention! "...I damned well WON'T marry guy! A real
guy or not, I've got my pride: I'm a GUY!!"
Startled, Kaneda looked at the girl martial artist.
There was nothing like danger to concentrate the
mind, {Ranma's not a girl. She's the guy I chased
around the house...." Revelation! "That's it!!" she
cried, leaping into her arms before Ranma had the
chance to do anything else. "I have to be a girl to
win over Ranma!"
Ranma cried, "Let go of me!!" She was trying to
shake the larger girl from her. Kane-chan had her
mitts around the redhead's neck, and her legs were
bent trapping her arm. "Get off!! I told you I ain't
gettin' hooked up to a freak!!"
Nabiki watched Ranma-chan spin them around the room.
Ranma-chan would go into this contortion or that
somersault trying to dislodge Kane-chan. "Well,
well. Saotome has a weak point." When Ranma-chan got
close enough, Nabiki casually tripped her with a
hand.
Ranma-chan fell; Kane-chan landed on her. Only Kane-
chan cried, "Ah-ch, ch! Boobs hurt!"
Ranma yelled, "And they don't feel too good when
somebody else's land on them, either!"
Kasumi was blushing, "That sort of thing might be
alright for a man and his woman, but between TWO
women?"
Nabiki told her, "Akane wants Ranma to become a guy
again."
Kasumi nodded, "Oh! Then it would be alright!"
Nabiki said, "See, Ranma? You have to become a guy
when Akane acts this way. If you don't, you will
cause a scandal."
Furious now, Ranma looked at the girl on top of her.
"The Code don't say nothing about a GIRL not beatin'
up a girl!!"
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Nabiki ran from the shouting and clashing, and
banging in the family room. She went straight into
the kitchen and to the kettle on the stovetop. She
tapped it with her fingernails as a test. "A good
thing there was already some hot water in it!" she
said, rushing back to the rescue.
She found Rana-chan's arms crawling their way out
from under the table, and Kane-chan struggling lift
the armoire. She commented, "Don't be ridiculous.
You couldn't even move that when you were a guy."
Kane-chan made one last attempt, muttering something
about "Shinobu the Might Desk-throwing Girl".
Nabiki said, "Try Ryuunosuke." Would Kane-chan have
any more luck than that martial arts girl did in
overcoming her guy-conditioning?
She looked at Ranma-chan's head and shoulders come
out in the open. Of course, Ryuunosuke ALSO married
a cross-dressing guy.
A douse of hot water, and Ranma had black hair.
Ranma-kun's fist hit the floor in further
frustration, "Now, I can't do anything to her!" He
pushed the table away as he moved his legs free.
"Why!?! Why couldn't I fight her!? A girl can fight
a girl!?!"
Nabiki said, "Well, there's your answer. To fight a
girl, you have to accept that you are a girl, too."
Luckily, Kaneda didn't have Ranma's rigid standard
of manliness. She would know.
Ranma-kun tried to rise to his feet, "You don't
think I'm a girl when I get wet!?!" His fingers
touched the floor to steady himself.
Kane-chan came over, "Oh, she's a girl!"
Ranma told her, "He: HE!"
Nabiki turned a scornful eye to her younger sibling,
"Only physically." Her gaze returned to Ranma-kun,
"Until there's a break-through in his mental block,
you should be safe. As long as you remain a girl."
Kane-chan said, "There's a motivation to stay cool."
Ranma felt solid enough to stand. "I thought you're
SUPPOSED to be a martial art!?! What were you doing
throwing things at me, and hitting me with a bamboo
sword!?!!"
Kane-chan told him, "When I'm a girl, I can use girl
tactics: Anything-Goes!"
Ranma-kun shouted, "Anything-Goes MARTIAL Arts!
Martial!!"
Nabiki almost smiled. She was surprised that Kane-
chan had figured it out. The best way to give Ranma
his break-through was to use martial arts on him.
Ranma's martial arts training would logically
trigger martial arts responses, eventually. In a
fair fight, Kane-chan didn't stand hardly a chance
against a guy who'd spent all of his life doing
little else BUT train.
But by sticking with things girls did, or at least
things her idiot brother (and hopefully Ranma-kun,
too) THOUGHT girls did, she put Ranma at a severe
disadvantage. His code against fighting girls had
been too well drilled into him.
And, Nabiki suspected, other techniques, as well,
had him conditioned to save his potency for battle.
Ranma wasn't just a virgin: He was incapable of
responding like a normal man.
So much for Nabiki's own frustrations.
Nabiki looked at her sibling. Akane may have a
chance to find the key. But Kaneda? She shook her
head. Not unless inside Ranma's girl form there was
a normal girl that could be released.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Ranma-kun stormed out of the living room, headed for
the upstairs.
Kasumi called out, "Good night! Sleep well!"
Kane-chan dropped to the floor and sat like a guy,
legs apart. "I'm so confused. I like her, but then
she does something that sets me off."
Nabiki said, "It only means you have feelings for
her. The question is do you have them for HIM, the
guy?"
Kane-chan was visibly repulsed, "Like a guy--Like
THAT!?"
Standing by her, Nabiki put her hands on her knees,
"But you're a GIRL. Remember the scandal factor.
Remember how important a reputation is to a martial
artist."
Kasumi went, "Oh, My!" as if to underline her point.
Kane-chan became serious. "...Reputation is all a
school of martial arts has." They, like Ranma, had
been kept in the dark about the Anything-Goes
School's true reputation. (Luckily just vague rumors
after all these years.) That more than anything else
accounted for the number of students enrolled at the
dojo. It was also why honor was so important to both
families.
Kasumi tried to smile, "I'm glad to see the young
lady does have modesty. Today's episode was an
aberration."
(Nabiki said, "I doubt that.")
Kasumi smiled when she thought she'd found an
explanation, "Akane was just glad to see her cousin
after he'd returned from China!" Nabiki wondered how
creative Big Sister would be able to be.
Kane-chan blinked. "She can accept that Ranma can
change, but not me?"
Nabiki told her, "Ranma's not family." She smiled,
"Yet."
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Kasumi announced, "Dinner's ready."
Kane-chan frowned, "I'm not in the mood." Ignoring
the gurgling in her stomach, she got up, "I'm going
to bed."
Kasumi said, "Oh, my, now where are we going to put
you? The Saotomes are in the guest room."
Kane-chan got exasperated, and looked towards the
ceiling, "I'm going where I ALWAYS go after I
disappear out of sight, out of mind."
Nabiki waved a finger, "Unh, unh, uhn! You're not
that mysterious girl any more. You have an identity.
You're Akane Saotome. Kasumi isn't going to be
forgetting about you now." She smiled, "Are you,
Kasumi?"
Kasumi smiled sweetly for the guest, "Of course not!
I could never forget the fiancée of man who's the
girl my brother's engaged to."
It took a moment for Kane-chan to understand what
Kasumi had said, "Can you repeat that again? That
sounds just too weird."
Nabiki said, "That's what happens when you have
people that change." She walked towards her.
Kane-chan suggested, "Wouldn't it be simpler on you,
Kasumi, to think of Ranma as being two people, too?"
Nabiki gently took her by the shoulders and directed
her out, "Let's not go there. Then Kasumi would have
to find a place for Ranma-chan to stay."
Kane-chan smiled, "She could stay with me."
Nabiki shook her head, "Not after that little
display just now." Pushing Kane-chan along towards
the upstairs, she said to her older sister, "Kane-
chan will stay with me, Kasumi. She has a sleeping
bag. Don't you?"
Kane-chan nodded. "If I can find it."
Nabiki made a motion towards the back of Kane-chan's
head. "It's times like this I wish I were more
physical."
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
The clock said it was 10:39 pm. Kane-chan had STILL
not gotten to sleep. And despite how tired she was
it was looking like she wouldn't get any sleep. "At
least not until I get out of this body. It's too
lumpy! I can't get comfortable with hips, ass and
boobs!" Her stomach's growl added another argument
for getting up.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
She was in Kaneda's now oversized 'Star' pajamas.
They were blue with yellow crossing lines and
shorter diagonal ones. Over its one breast pocket it
had a small tiger's head.
She walked with her thighs getting closer together.
As she passed the lav, she wondered how she'd
managed to go this long without going in there.
Inside she realized she would have to go as a girl.
She had memories of a few experiments at that long
ago, and Hiroshi and Daisuke's pictures of girls
doing it for the camera. But there was a sink with
hot water in the lav.
By the time the water had run long enough to raise a
steam, Kane-chan could no longer endure the wait.
It was as bad as she thought it would be. She missed
his manhood.
He wasn't ready to think of himself as a girl!
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Kaneda went to the kitchen. His stomach was loud
enough to echo in the inner hallway, now.
He turned on the light. The guy Ranma was there!
Kaneda's underdeveloped martial arts' sense warned
him of the danger too late.
Ranma got up, "I see that you're finally a guy."
Kaneda needed an idea: "Shh! You'll wake everybody
up! You ARE a guest in my house!"
Ranma glared, growled, and sat back down.
Kaneda was about to make his escape, but his stomach
made its own growling noises.
He did his best to ignore the gaze burning into the
back of his head. He had heard legends about those
kinds of attacks.
Luckily, Ranma hadn't learned how to do that yet.
After taking out the salad bowl to look behind it,
Kaneda found a couple of eggs and a bowl of red bean
rice. Like most Japanese, Kasumi shopped regularly,
and brought home what she could carry. There was
little else in the fridge he felt like eating. Of
course, it could've just been his instincts deciding
for him.
Kaneda looked over at Ranma, "Did you eat ALL of the
abalone?!"
Ranma said, "There's just this one left," picking it
up. He bent his head back, and opened his mouth.
Distracted by the image, he put the eggs and soup in
the salad bowl. Annoyed, Kaneda asked, "Do you want
some seaweed to go with that?"
Ranma said, "Sure! You got some?"
Frowning deeper, now, Kaneda said, "You know the
abalone and kombu seaweed are supposed to be brought
by the GROOM?"
Ranma nearly choked.
Kaneda came over, "Are you okay? Hey, I'm sorry.
You're the guest." {What am I now, a guy or a girl?}
Ranma recovered by saying, "I'm also the man here,"
referring to the custom of men being served first.
Though it galled him, which, no doubt, was why
Ranma'd said it. But Kaneda decided not to argue.
Kaneda sat down with what was left him.
Ranma eyed the bowl. "You eat salad?"
Kaneda noticed what he'd done. Ranma already thought
he was an idiot. He needed a cover-up, "Sure! Do you
think only girls eat salads?" Of course, there WERE
two girls in the house. Kaneda wasn't ready to be
the third. "Greens are good for your body. You sure
know that as a martial artist."
Ranma told him, "Produce are bulky when you're
travelin'. Rice-and-protein is the essential." Then
he added, "Oh, and some cabbage against scurvy."
Kaneda poked his fork around in the mess, "No
cabbage in here."
The reasonably well-fed Ranma smelled, then looked
what the fork had come up with. "Is that red bean
rice. You DO know that's definitive girl food?"
Ranma knew that much about the Japanese custom, but
he didn't know it was served to celebrate a girl's
first period.
Kaneda got red, embarrassed and angry. He DID know
about it being used to acknowledge that the
threshold into womanhood had been crossed. He didn't
remember, though, Kasumi had bought three cans of
red beans seven years ago. This was the last one.
The best defense is an offense, "And I suppose just
because I like eggs, that ALSO makes me a girl?"
Ranma was about to make a comment, but was stopped
by a strange feeling. Food was another of Ranma's
weak points, not quality, quantity. He liked eating.
An association had been formed between food, Kaneda
and girl.
The guy he saw was just the cursed form. Kaneda was
really a girl. Kaneda had fought like a girl. And
now Kaneda ate like a girl. Ranma wasn't able to
figure why he was feeling the way he was, but he did
feel the snare closing in around him.
Ranma escaped back upstairs.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
The early spring morning had fog on the town.
Despite a few hours lost sleep, Kaneda was out on
his jog. He would do a left/right combination punch,
sometimes bending to get in an uppercut, and
occasionally he would throw in a side kick. Working
out always made him feel better. He was able to turn
off other thoughts, and worries and get into the
zone of his movements.
By the time he entered the fortress-like gate of the
Tendou compound he was so into his comfortable
familiar routine he'd forgotten that the body he was
using was the wrong one.
BERNGZZ!, "HHAA!", "Ranma!"
By Ron Dow75
From an idea by James M. Zema,
Unauthorized, but allowed.
02: Ranma's Girl Problem
Kaneda dropped his do-gi pants in the laundry
basket. He paused to look at the familiar door that
had taunted him all of his life. Everybody else
could take hot soaks in the furo/tub, but not him.
He had to take cold showers. If he didn't, he would
be changed into a girl the minute he touched hot
water.
But he was raised to be a guy, the man who would
inherit the Tendou legacy and property. Every time
he did not live up to his dad's expectations, Dad
went weird. Every time his sister Nabiki discovered
him as a girl, she would make comments that made him
feel little. But worse, every time Kasumi found him
as a girl, she would treat him as if he WERE a girl!
By the time he was old enough to think there might
be some benefits to his problem, he'd met his
friends. Hiroshi and Daisuke made it clear what you
were supposed to do with a girl's body. Meanwhile
there were girls around him having a variety of
female problems. His pubescent doubts and anxieties
were multiplied. That's when he stopped taking hot
baths altogether.
Kaneda the heir to the Tendou School of Anything-
Goes Martials Arts lost his nerve.
But now the moment of truth had arrived. Hot water
made him a girl because he really was....
His headache went from dull to throbbing! He'd had
it since the girl Ranma'd socked him and he whacked
his head on the floor of the dojo. It was different
from anything he'd felt before.
Little did he suspect he then he was but the first
of a number of people who would receive the
"Juusenkyo Blow to the Soul".
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Nabiki, then the new girl knelt down at the living
room table, and waited across from each other for
the big explosion from the bathroom.
Kasumi offered, "I'll go fill the kettle again and
we can have tea."
The little Ranma watch the older sister get the
teakettle from where Nabiki'd left it, and leave for
the kitchen. "Is she serious?"
Nabiki said, "Try oblivious. Daddy doesn't want to
deal with Kaneda's change, so Kasumi doesn't want
to, either."
Ranma got the creeps, "So, you mean Kaneda's been
free to play her sick games all a her life?!"
Big sister slapped her hand down on the table, "Try
the other way around, Saotome! Whatever else Kaneda
may be, he has family feeling. He knows it how
upsets everybody and the neighbors when he changes."
Then she leaned forward to level her eye at the
strange girl making insinuations. "Kaneda does NOT
become a girl out of choice." Nabiki realized she
hadn't readjusted how SHE thought of her little
'brother', yet.
"H, hel, hello," a voice at the door said.
Ranma looked, and said to the older sister, "Make
that past tense."
Standing in a blue terrycloth bathrobe was a 5'4"
girl with long black hair. Beyond that Ranma was in
no mood to judge.
Nabiki looked, and commented, "You haven't changed a
bit since the last time I teased you, Kane-chan."
Kane-chan frowned, "Thanks for reminding of another
reason I don't like having this body."
Though remaining sympathetic, Nabiki couldn't resist
saying, "Once you get used to being a girl, I can
always tease you by turning you into a guy."
Kane-chan came over to the table, "You don't tease
Kasumi!"
Nabiki, still smiling said, "I guess it's just more
fun to kid your kid brother."
It was Ranma's turn to level her eyes, " ' Sounds
like you're jealous."
Nabiki give her a bemused look, "Me? Jealous?"
Kane-chan fell to her knees on the side between
them, "Oh, great! If a girl who's been a girl all of
her life thinks it's better to be a guy, why do I
want to be a girl?"
Nabiki said to her sibling, but putting an edge to
it for Ranma, "I didn't say I didn't like being a
girl. Look what's suggesting it!"
Kane-chan bowed her head towards her breasts.
"Someone who knows what it's like to be both."
Ranma said, "You got that right! Bein' a girl
sucks!"
Kane-chan flinched at the unfortunate choice of
word. Ranma didn't notice the implications, but,
then, he didn't have friends like Hiroshi and
Daisuke.
Big sister said, "You're NOT helping, Saotome. You
KNOW I don't just have Kaneda I can tease now."
Ranma thumbed her fist towards herself, "Try it, and
you'll wish you hadn't!"
Nabiki said, "Is that a challenge?"
Kane-chan cried, "Stop it!! Isn't there enough
conflict going on inside me, without having to hear
it outside!?!" She was fighting to keep from crying.
She had sworn never to cry like... Dad.
To Ranma it was just like a girl. She snorted. "I
had expected more rage and furry at findin' out you
weren't a guy."
Kane-chan rested her forearms on the table, "I
always knew I could change into a girl. I just
didn't know I was a girl." She slumped over the
table. She felt her breasts try to dangle within her
robe. {Do girls get used to the feeling?}
Kasumi appeared at the door, "I thought I heard
company. The tea will only be a few minutes more.
But why don't you invite the girl to dinner. We'll
have more than enough, seeing as Father and his old
friend seem to have decided to dine out together.
They have SO much to catch up on."
Ranma leaned her weight on an arm while she studied
the oldest sister. "No reality check there." The to
her, "Aren't you interested in WHO this girl is?
That WOULD be the polite thing to ask."
Kasumi started to fidget. "Well...yes. That WOULD be
the proper amenity when meeting a new person..." She
was beginning to perspire. "I try to be the proper
hostess. I don't know where..."
Her back to her motherly sister, Kane-chan could
hear how uncomfortable she was. She was being forced
to face something she had been trying to avoid all
of her life, and it tore Kane-chan up inside, too.
Nabiki hissed at Ranma, "That WASN'T a smart move,
martial artist!"
Ranma shot back at her, "It ain't gonna keep naggin'
at her WHY there's a strange girl in her house that
isn't going away?"
Nabiki saw Ranma was, unfortunately, right. Kaneda
the girl would not be going away as before. To learn
to be a girl, he--she(!) had to remain a girl.
She took a deep breath, and faced the sister still
stuck in a dither, "Kasumi, this i...uh, Akane."
Ranma rolled her big blue eyes. She couldn't come up
with a more original name? A-Kane-d-A, really!
Immediately, Kasumi was back to her normal self,
"Akane! Such a nice name for a girl."
Kane-chan took her head off the table to look at the
one who liked to think she was the smart one. "
"Akane"??" Her skin crawled. Kaneda was a shield
that kept her from fully recognizing the femaleness
threatening to overwhelm her.
Nabiki said, "Trust me." She then continued for the
benefit of Kasumi, "Akane Saotome."
Ranma leaped to her feet, "What!?!"
Kane-chan leaped to her feet, "I WAS thinking it
would be Ranma TENDOU!" Obviously he WASN'T ready to
admit which was the girl.
Nabiki put her right arm on the table, and tried to
stare the two down, "Akane is Ranma-kun's kissing
cousin. She can marry HIM." SHE certainly didn't
want him!
Ranma-kun stomped her bare foot on the table, "I
don't want to be ANYbody's fiancee!!"
Kane-chan blinked at her sister. "Why would I want
to marry a guy?"
Nabiki turned to Kane-chan, "Symmetry. Ranma-chan
can still be the fiancee of Kaneda."
She added, "And everything would be legal. Almost."
All they needed was a fake birth certificate.
Ranma lifted the table up, "If I don't want a girl..."
There was something about this guy-girl that got on
his last nerve! He flipped the table behind her and
strode to center stage. She DEMANDED their
attention! "...I damned well WON'T marry guy! A real
guy or not, I've got my pride: I'm a GUY!!"
Startled, Kaneda looked at the girl martial artist.
There was nothing like danger to concentrate the
mind, {Ranma's not a girl. She's the guy I chased
around the house...." Revelation! "That's it!!" she
cried, leaping into her arms before Ranma had the
chance to do anything else. "I have to be a girl to
win over Ranma!"
Ranma cried, "Let go of me!!" She was trying to
shake the larger girl from her. Kane-chan had her
mitts around the redhead's neck, and her legs were
bent trapping her arm. "Get off!! I told you I ain't
gettin' hooked up to a freak!!"
Nabiki watched Ranma-chan spin them around the room.
Ranma-chan would go into this contortion or that
somersault trying to dislodge Kane-chan. "Well,
well. Saotome has a weak point." When Ranma-chan got
close enough, Nabiki casually tripped her with a
hand.
Ranma-chan fell; Kane-chan landed on her. Only Kane-
chan cried, "Ah-ch, ch! Boobs hurt!"
Ranma yelled, "And they don't feel too good when
somebody else's land on them, either!"
Kasumi was blushing, "That sort of thing might be
alright for a man and his woman, but between TWO
women?"
Nabiki told her, "Akane wants Ranma to become a guy
again."
Kasumi nodded, "Oh! Then it would be alright!"
Nabiki said, "See, Ranma? You have to become a guy
when Akane acts this way. If you don't, you will
cause a scandal."
Furious now, Ranma looked at the girl on top of her.
"The Code don't say nothing about a GIRL not beatin'
up a girl!!"
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Nabiki ran from the shouting and clashing, and
banging in the family room. She went straight into
the kitchen and to the kettle on the stovetop. She
tapped it with her fingernails as a test. "A good
thing there was already some hot water in it!" she
said, rushing back to the rescue.
She found Rana-chan's arms crawling their way out
from under the table, and Kane-chan struggling lift
the armoire. She commented, "Don't be ridiculous.
You couldn't even move that when you were a guy."
Kane-chan made one last attempt, muttering something
about "Shinobu the Might Desk-throwing Girl".
Nabiki said, "Try Ryuunosuke." Would Kane-chan have
any more luck than that martial arts girl did in
overcoming her guy-conditioning?
She looked at Ranma-chan's head and shoulders come
out in the open. Of course, Ryuunosuke ALSO married
a cross-dressing guy.
A douse of hot water, and Ranma had black hair.
Ranma-kun's fist hit the floor in further
frustration, "Now, I can't do anything to her!" He
pushed the table away as he moved his legs free.
"Why!?! Why couldn't I fight her!? A girl can fight
a girl!?!"
Nabiki said, "Well, there's your answer. To fight a
girl, you have to accept that you are a girl, too."
Luckily, Kaneda didn't have Ranma's rigid standard
of manliness. She would know.
Ranma-kun tried to rise to his feet, "You don't
think I'm a girl when I get wet!?!" His fingers
touched the floor to steady himself.
Kane-chan came over, "Oh, she's a girl!"
Ranma told her, "He: HE!"
Nabiki turned a scornful eye to her younger sibling,
"Only physically." Her gaze returned to Ranma-kun,
"Until there's a break-through in his mental block,
you should be safe. As long as you remain a girl."
Kane-chan said, "There's a motivation to stay cool."
Ranma felt solid enough to stand. "I thought you're
SUPPOSED to be a martial art!?! What were you doing
throwing things at me, and hitting me with a bamboo
sword!?!!"
Kane-chan told him, "When I'm a girl, I can use girl
tactics: Anything-Goes!"
Ranma-kun shouted, "Anything-Goes MARTIAL Arts!
Martial!!"
Nabiki almost smiled. She was surprised that Kane-
chan had figured it out. The best way to give Ranma
his break-through was to use martial arts on him.
Ranma's martial arts training would logically
trigger martial arts responses, eventually. In a
fair fight, Kane-chan didn't stand hardly a chance
against a guy who'd spent all of his life doing
little else BUT train.
But by sticking with things girls did, or at least
things her idiot brother (and hopefully Ranma-kun,
too) THOUGHT girls did, she put Ranma at a severe
disadvantage. His code against fighting girls had
been too well drilled into him.
And, Nabiki suspected, other techniques, as well,
had him conditioned to save his potency for battle.
Ranma wasn't just a virgin: He was incapable of
responding like a normal man.
So much for Nabiki's own frustrations.
Nabiki looked at her sibling. Akane may have a
chance to find the key. But Kaneda? She shook her
head. Not unless inside Ranma's girl form there was
a normal girl that could be released.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Ranma-kun stormed out of the living room, headed for
the upstairs.
Kasumi called out, "Good night! Sleep well!"
Kane-chan dropped to the floor and sat like a guy,
legs apart. "I'm so confused. I like her, but then
she does something that sets me off."
Nabiki said, "It only means you have feelings for
her. The question is do you have them for HIM, the
guy?"
Kane-chan was visibly repulsed, "Like a guy--Like
THAT!?"
Standing by her, Nabiki put her hands on her knees,
"But you're a GIRL. Remember the scandal factor.
Remember how important a reputation is to a martial
artist."
Kasumi went, "Oh, My!" as if to underline her point.
Kane-chan became serious. "...Reputation is all a
school of martial arts has." They, like Ranma, had
been kept in the dark about the Anything-Goes
School's true reputation. (Luckily just vague rumors
after all these years.) That more than anything else
accounted for the number of students enrolled at the
dojo. It was also why honor was so important to both
families.
Kasumi tried to smile, "I'm glad to see the young
lady does have modesty. Today's episode was an
aberration."
(Nabiki said, "I doubt that.")
Kasumi smiled when she thought she'd found an
explanation, "Akane was just glad to see her cousin
after he'd returned from China!" Nabiki wondered how
creative Big Sister would be able to be.
Kane-chan blinked. "She can accept that Ranma can
change, but not me?"
Nabiki told her, "Ranma's not family." She smiled,
"Yet."
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Kasumi announced, "Dinner's ready."
Kane-chan frowned, "I'm not in the mood." Ignoring
the gurgling in her stomach, she got up, "I'm going
to bed."
Kasumi said, "Oh, my, now where are we going to put
you? The Saotomes are in the guest room."
Kane-chan got exasperated, and looked towards the
ceiling, "I'm going where I ALWAYS go after I
disappear out of sight, out of mind."
Nabiki waved a finger, "Unh, unh, uhn! You're not
that mysterious girl any more. You have an identity.
You're Akane Saotome. Kasumi isn't going to be
forgetting about you now." She smiled, "Are you,
Kasumi?"
Kasumi smiled sweetly for the guest, "Of course not!
I could never forget the fiancée of man who's the
girl my brother's engaged to."
It took a moment for Kane-chan to understand what
Kasumi had said, "Can you repeat that again? That
sounds just too weird."
Nabiki said, "That's what happens when you have
people that change." She walked towards her.
Kane-chan suggested, "Wouldn't it be simpler on you,
Kasumi, to think of Ranma as being two people, too?"
Nabiki gently took her by the shoulders and directed
her out, "Let's not go there. Then Kasumi would have
to find a place for Ranma-chan to stay."
Kane-chan smiled, "She could stay with me."
Nabiki shook her head, "Not after that little
display just now." Pushing Kane-chan along towards
the upstairs, she said to her older sister, "Kane-
chan will stay with me, Kasumi. She has a sleeping
bag. Don't you?"
Kane-chan nodded. "If I can find it."
Nabiki made a motion towards the back of Kane-chan's
head. "It's times like this I wish I were more
physical."
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
The clock said it was 10:39 pm. Kane-chan had STILL
not gotten to sleep. And despite how tired she was
it was looking like she wouldn't get any sleep. "At
least not until I get out of this body. It's too
lumpy! I can't get comfortable with hips, ass and
boobs!" Her stomach's growl added another argument
for getting up.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
She was in Kaneda's now oversized 'Star' pajamas.
They were blue with yellow crossing lines and
shorter diagonal ones. Over its one breast pocket it
had a small tiger's head.
She walked with her thighs getting closer together.
As she passed the lav, she wondered how she'd
managed to go this long without going in there.
Inside she realized she would have to go as a girl.
She had memories of a few experiments at that long
ago, and Hiroshi and Daisuke's pictures of girls
doing it for the camera. But there was a sink with
hot water in the lav.
By the time the water had run long enough to raise a
steam, Kane-chan could no longer endure the wait.
It was as bad as she thought it would be. She missed
his manhood.
He wasn't ready to think of himself as a girl!
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Kaneda went to the kitchen. His stomach was loud
enough to echo in the inner hallway, now.
He turned on the light. The guy Ranma was there!
Kaneda's underdeveloped martial arts' sense warned
him of the danger too late.
Ranma got up, "I see that you're finally a guy."
Kaneda needed an idea: "Shh! You'll wake everybody
up! You ARE a guest in my house!"
Ranma glared, growled, and sat back down.
Kaneda was about to make his escape, but his stomach
made its own growling noises.
He did his best to ignore the gaze burning into the
back of his head. He had heard legends about those
kinds of attacks.
Luckily, Ranma hadn't learned how to do that yet.
After taking out the salad bowl to look behind it,
Kaneda found a couple of eggs and a bowl of red bean
rice. Like most Japanese, Kasumi shopped regularly,
and brought home what she could carry. There was
little else in the fridge he felt like eating. Of
course, it could've just been his instincts deciding
for him.
Kaneda looked over at Ranma, "Did you eat ALL of the
abalone?!"
Ranma said, "There's just this one left," picking it
up. He bent his head back, and opened his mouth.
Distracted by the image, he put the eggs and soup in
the salad bowl. Annoyed, Kaneda asked, "Do you want
some seaweed to go with that?"
Ranma said, "Sure! You got some?"
Frowning deeper, now, Kaneda said, "You know the
abalone and kombu seaweed are supposed to be brought
by the GROOM?"
Ranma nearly choked.
Kaneda came over, "Are you okay? Hey, I'm sorry.
You're the guest." {What am I now, a guy or a girl?}
Ranma recovered by saying, "I'm also the man here,"
referring to the custom of men being served first.
Though it galled him, which, no doubt, was why
Ranma'd said it. But Kaneda decided not to argue.
Kaneda sat down with what was left him.
Ranma eyed the bowl. "You eat salad?"
Kaneda noticed what he'd done. Ranma already thought
he was an idiot. He needed a cover-up, "Sure! Do you
think only girls eat salads?" Of course, there WERE
two girls in the house. Kaneda wasn't ready to be
the third. "Greens are good for your body. You sure
know that as a martial artist."
Ranma told him, "Produce are bulky when you're
travelin'. Rice-and-protein is the essential." Then
he added, "Oh, and some cabbage against scurvy."
Kaneda poked his fork around in the mess, "No
cabbage in here."
The reasonably well-fed Ranma smelled, then looked
what the fork had come up with. "Is that red bean
rice. You DO know that's definitive girl food?"
Ranma knew that much about the Japanese custom, but
he didn't know it was served to celebrate a girl's
first period.
Kaneda got red, embarrassed and angry. He DID know
about it being used to acknowledge that the
threshold into womanhood had been crossed. He didn't
remember, though, Kasumi had bought three cans of
red beans seven years ago. This was the last one.
The best defense is an offense, "And I suppose just
because I like eggs, that ALSO makes me a girl?"
Ranma was about to make a comment, but was stopped
by a strange feeling. Food was another of Ranma's
weak points, not quality, quantity. He liked eating.
An association had been formed between food, Kaneda
and girl.
The guy he saw was just the cursed form. Kaneda was
really a girl. Kaneda had fought like a girl. And
now Kaneda ate like a girl. Ranma wasn't able to
figure why he was feeling the way he was, but he did
feel the snare closing in around him.
Ranma escaped back upstairs.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
The early spring morning had fog on the town.
Despite a few hours lost sleep, Kaneda was out on
his jog. He would do a left/right combination punch,
sometimes bending to get in an uppercut, and
occasionally he would throw in a side kick. Working
out always made him feel better. He was able to turn
off other thoughts, and worries and get into the
zone of his movements.
By the time he entered the fortress-like gate of the
Tendou compound he was so into his comfortable
familiar routine he'd forgotten that the body he was
using was the wrong one.
BERNGZZ!, "HHAA!", "Ranma!"