Part 7: Author is MIA.
Why must you all encourage this author? Really? Are you all just gluttons for punishment? Are you angry at the guys? Look at them. ::Camera pans on the huddled crying forms of the four lead characters:: They may never recover. Kyle is wanting to become a professional stripper, Alex is considering becoming Kyle's Pimp, Michael is about to join a monastery and Max… poor Max is freaking out wondering what Liz thought of "little Yoda".
I've kicked the author off this part of the story. Don't worry, he'll return for the next part. But I decided to write myself some. Since his friend wanted to have Max and all, so, I'm exercising my option of radically messing with stuff.
So, here's what happened. They got the money and paid off for the car repairs with a lot to spare. Okay, hold on. *Story steps away and smacks around the little paper clip dude in Microsoft Word* Okay, that guy was bugging me. As I was saying, they decided to drive all night to put distance between them and the girls. Unfortunately, they let Kyle drive. So they found themselves in Texas. I'm not going into how he drove.
The guys woke up and saw where Kyle landed them. It was then decided he would not be allowed to drive anymore. So, to have fun… Excuse me again. SHUT UP AUTHOR, THIS IS MY SECTION. Anyway, they decided to join in a little pick up baseball game, having nothing better to do and since I had no better ideas on what to do to them. Yadda yadda yadda, playing baseball, yadda yadda yadda, Max is at bat, yadda yadda yadda, he swings, hits the ball, it hits the pitcher in the crotch and he's down.
Maybe I should let the Author fix this, nah, I'll do this first. He sucks anyway. Uh oh, and now he's mad and . . . Okay, the Author just took back over.
So Max feels bad for him, he would heal him but, you know, doesn't want to touch the injury. So he's feeling bad as they take the guy away in an ambulance. Then Max gets punched in the gut. "YOU DORK, THAT WAS MY PROM DATE." Moral of the story, don't mess with Texas women or their Prom dates. As she was pretty much beating the stuffing out of him, and his friends were just watching in fear of her she continued to yell. "NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO? I HAVE A BEAUTIFUL DRESS BUT NO DATE AND I WILL" kicks Max, "NOT", another kick, "GO", he's getting hurt, "STAG!" By now Max is in the fetal position crying like a baby.
As Max lay there sobbing he choked out "I could escort you." And then he covered himself and hoped she wouldn't hurt him anymore.
"Really? Oh that'd be great. Meet me here at 6 o'clock and wear a tux hon. See you then." With that she smiled and skipped away.
"Mommy?" Max then passed out.
At six o'clock Maxwell Evans stood at the entrance to the field where he mortally (or so it felt) wounded a girl's prom date. So, in a tux (and wearing a cup) he was met by a limo and the girl in a stunningly romantic crimson prom dress. "Hi, I'm Jen. And this is a special night for me, so if you screw it up in any way after having hurt my escort, I will play baseball using your personal balls. Got that?"
"Yes Ma'am." Max was very afraid, and suddenly wished he was at home facing his hormonally unbalanced soul mate. So, he went with her and was very frightened. "Um, I'm Max, by the way. I'm sorry about what happened."
"It was an accident, but smile and look handsome like I know you can. You are going to make me the belle of the ball, understand? Now, let's have fun."
And fun they had, she even drug him to have her prom pictures taken with him. Several of the other ladies there were jealous because of how he looked, so she didn't feel so bad about her previous escorts' balls. So, she got his address and as the conclusion of the night dropped him back off at the field and thanked him for his help. He thanked her for not hurting him. He went back to his friends, crawled in the back and slept. And Michael drove, while listening to his special brand of music.
"Hey Max how's it hanging?" Kyle decided to be mean.
"They're still hanging, right? Ah, I'm just kidding Max, I'll let you alone." Alex got in on the action.
"I tell you right now, I'm not helping to heal anything she did. Understand?" Michael did not want to touch Max or any other guy there, no matter what.
"I will make sure that your girlfriends hurt you all very painfully when we get home." Max wanted to sleep. Really, really sleep.
"Sure Max, but, then we'd tell Liz that you took another girl to the prom." Kyle was having too much fun.
"I hate you all, I really do. I will get revenge. Kyle, Michael, I will destroy you. So sayeth the King."
"Thank you, thank you very much." Kyle did his Elvis impersonation.
"Elvis has left the planet." Michael said in a mock announcer voice.
"Remember, I'm behaving now Max." Alex kissed butt before it's too late.
"I shall have my revenge!" Max then let out an evil laugh and passed out in the backseat.
Blame the story for the suckiness of this part, not me, the oh so great Author.
Why must you all encourage this author? Really? Are you all just gluttons for punishment? Are you angry at the guys? Look at them. ::Camera pans on the huddled crying forms of the four lead characters:: They may never recover. Kyle is wanting to become a professional stripper, Alex is considering becoming Kyle's Pimp, Michael is about to join a monastery and Max… poor Max is freaking out wondering what Liz thought of "little Yoda".
I've kicked the author off this part of the story. Don't worry, he'll return for the next part. But I decided to write myself some. Since his friend wanted to have Max and all, so, I'm exercising my option of radically messing with stuff.
So, here's what happened. They got the money and paid off for the car repairs with a lot to spare. Okay, hold on. *Story steps away and smacks around the little paper clip dude in Microsoft Word* Okay, that guy was bugging me. As I was saying, they decided to drive all night to put distance between them and the girls. Unfortunately, they let Kyle drive. So they found themselves in Texas. I'm not going into how he drove.
The guys woke up and saw where Kyle landed them. It was then decided he would not be allowed to drive anymore. So, to have fun… Excuse me again. SHUT UP AUTHOR, THIS IS MY SECTION. Anyway, they decided to join in a little pick up baseball game, having nothing better to do and since I had no better ideas on what to do to them. Yadda yadda yadda, playing baseball, yadda yadda yadda, Max is at bat, yadda yadda yadda, he swings, hits the ball, it hits the pitcher in the crotch and he's down.
Maybe I should let the Author fix this, nah, I'll do this first. He sucks anyway. Uh oh, and now he's mad and . . . Okay, the Author just took back over.
So Max feels bad for him, he would heal him but, you know, doesn't want to touch the injury. So he's feeling bad as they take the guy away in an ambulance. Then Max gets punched in the gut. "YOU DORK, THAT WAS MY PROM DATE." Moral of the story, don't mess with Texas women or their Prom dates. As she was pretty much beating the stuffing out of him, and his friends were just watching in fear of her she continued to yell. "NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO? I HAVE A BEAUTIFUL DRESS BUT NO DATE AND I WILL" kicks Max, "NOT", another kick, "GO", he's getting hurt, "STAG!" By now Max is in the fetal position crying like a baby.
As Max lay there sobbing he choked out "I could escort you." And then he covered himself and hoped she wouldn't hurt him anymore.
"Really? Oh that'd be great. Meet me here at 6 o'clock and wear a tux hon. See you then." With that she smiled and skipped away.
"Mommy?" Max then passed out.
At six o'clock Maxwell Evans stood at the entrance to the field where he mortally (or so it felt) wounded a girl's prom date. So, in a tux (and wearing a cup) he was met by a limo and the girl in a stunningly romantic crimson prom dress. "Hi, I'm Jen. And this is a special night for me, so if you screw it up in any way after having hurt my escort, I will play baseball using your personal balls. Got that?"
"Yes Ma'am." Max was very afraid, and suddenly wished he was at home facing his hormonally unbalanced soul mate. So, he went with her and was very frightened. "Um, I'm Max, by the way. I'm sorry about what happened."
"It was an accident, but smile and look handsome like I know you can. You are going to make me the belle of the ball, understand? Now, let's have fun."
And fun they had, she even drug him to have her prom pictures taken with him. Several of the other ladies there were jealous because of how he looked, so she didn't feel so bad about her previous escorts' balls. So, she got his address and as the conclusion of the night dropped him back off at the field and thanked him for his help. He thanked her for not hurting him. He went back to his friends, crawled in the back and slept. And Michael drove, while listening to his special brand of music.
"Hey Max how's it hanging?" Kyle decided to be mean.
"They're still hanging, right? Ah, I'm just kidding Max, I'll let you alone." Alex got in on the action.
"I tell you right now, I'm not helping to heal anything she did. Understand?" Michael did not want to touch Max or any other guy there, no matter what.
"I will make sure that your girlfriends hurt you all very painfully when we get home." Max wanted to sleep. Really, really sleep.
"Sure Max, but, then we'd tell Liz that you took another girl to the prom." Kyle was having too much fun.
"I hate you all, I really do. I will get revenge. Kyle, Michael, I will destroy you. So sayeth the King."
"Thank you, thank you very much." Kyle did his Elvis impersonation.
"Elvis has left the planet." Michael said in a mock announcer voice.
"Remember, I'm behaving now Max." Alex kissed butt before it's too late.
"I shall have my revenge!" Max then let out an evil laugh and passed out in the backseat.
Blame the story for the suckiness of this part, not me, the oh so great Author.