Interlude 45.976-HOT-NUDE-ROSWELLIANS
Alex: When the hell did Joss start writing Roswell?
Max: Oh come on, it's not that bad.
Michael: Yeah, they're writing me pretty well.
Kyle: Aren't we just supposed to make fun of the fic?
Alex: Yeah, usually. But I'm so pissed off this week, man, what the hell are they doing?
Michael: Your actor wanted to go make movies probably.
Alex: The prick, ******* Tom Hank's wannabe (rest of Alex's rant on the status of the actor who portrays him has been removed due to the explicit content and graphic nature, this rant also went on to include the actor's parents, the network, the writers and random people Alex thought of)
Kyle: I had no idea you knew that kind of language.
Michael: I had no idea you'd use that kind of language.
Max: What did that one word mean?
Alex Takes Some Deep Calm Soothing Breaths
Alex: @#&(&@$!*($&!$(&#!%(#(!&$(!@*$(*!)#$*#!($&(!%(!#$*(&%!(*^)_$)@^&!#(&$(
Other Three Get Scared And Back Away
Alex: It's okay, I'm calm now. Just when we help Spike hurt Joss, we have to pay a visit to the Roswell people that's all.
Max: Okay…
Kyle: Yeah…
Michael: Uhhuh…
Alex: Really, I'm better now. So, what's this stuff about us crossdressing and singing RHPS songs?
Michael: I don't know, but I hope it's not me. I've done enough humiliating things this fic.
Kyle: Same here.
Max: What, and we haven't?
Kyle & Michael Together: No.
Alex: Shuddup you two. It should be funny to see what Tess and Maria do to you two.
Michael: You know of course that you will get yours.
Kyle: Even if we have to arrange it. This goes for you two Max.
Max: Anyone else notice our interlude here is just us threatening each other?
Alex: Maybe the Author is spiking the air or something. Or we're all just pissed about the last ep.
Michael: I didn't mind it really, Amy liked me.
Alex Hits Michael
Michael: Ow, why am I always getting my ass kicked?
Max: You bring it on yourself.
Kyle: You really do.
Alex: You're our whipping boy. You're a lot like Daniel on Stargate SG-1, you get beat up on and get into trouble get rescued.
Michael: But you all have been in scrapes too.
Max: True, but you're also a good target because you're the most relationshiply challenged one among us.
Michael: So because I'm a crappy boyfriend I'm a target for pain and humiliation?
Kyle, Max & Alex: Yup.
Michael: I'm so screwed.
Kyle: But you look good getting screwed.
Max, Michael & Alex Look At Kyle Oddly
Kyle: NON-SLASHY.
Other Guys Unconvincingly: Uh huh.
Kyle: REALLY.
Other Guys, Still Not Convinced: Sure.
Kyle Pouts
Michael: ANYWAY, what was the Author talking about? What parody of "No Sex In The Champagne Room"?
Alex: Oh, actually that is my and Kyle's fault. We were writing it, I guess the Author is taking credit since in his world we're just fictional characters.
Kyle: The bastard.
Max: So what is it?
Alex: Well, okay, we'll sing it to you. But you need to sing along like was with Chris Rock's version, okay? And don't hurt us until it's done.
Michael: I think I'll regret this, but okay.
Alex: Okay. Kyle, you ready? Let's start.
Alex: Ladies and Geeks with passing marks of the Starfleet Entrance Exam of 2001.
Kyle: We have one piece of advice for you.
Alex: No matter what an alien tells you, there's no lube on the anal probe.
Kyle: None. Sure, your ass is going to get probed, but there's no lube.
Alex: And you want lube, believe us.
Kyle: Don't go with aliens with no corporeal form.
Alex: Sure they look cute and foggy, but they'll probably take over your body.
Kyle: You can fight them on the outside.
Alex: But once in, you just ain't got a chance.
Kyle: If an alien looks 17, and says he's 17, his genetic material is well over 50.
Alex: If a part crazy girl says she 17 and aliens are after her, she's your grand kid.
Kyle: Take off that silly Star Trek t-shirt.
Alex: Aliens couldn't possibly have done all those crop circles.
Kyle: Drunk-ass rednecks did some of that sh*t.
Alex: Young human men out there, if you're dating an alien and she has a mood swing.
Kyle: Don't tell her that her Alien PMS must be kicking in.
Kyle: Tabasco - Ain't nothin' wrong with that.
Alex & Kyle: Remember this one thing, there's no lube on the anal probe.
Max: Ahhhhh…
Michael: No lube on the anal probe
Max: No lube on the anal probe
Michael: No lube on the anal probe
Max: No lube on the anal probe
Michael: No lube on the anal probe
Max: No lube on the anal probe
Together: Noooo….
Alex: If a stranded alien has a funny sign
Kyle: He hasn't been stranded very long
Alex: Really stranded aliens are too busy hiding to be funny
Kyle: If an alien girl groupie has a pierced tongue, she'll probably suck your ****
Michael: That'd be great.
Alex: If an girl Alien has a pierced tongue, she'll probably suck out your brains.
Max: Oh, don't want that, no…
Kyle: Here's a horoscope for everyone.
Alex: Aquarius: You're going to be abducted ya crazies.
Kyle: Capricorn: You're going to be abducted.
Alex: Gemini: You're going to be abducted TWICE.
Kyle: Leo: You're going to be abducted.
Alex: Scorpio: You're going to be abducted and be an Alien Goddess' sex slave.
Michael: Oh yeah…
Alex: No one goes to the Crashdown for hooters.
Max: Hey! Hey! Hey!
Kyle: If you've been dating an older human for months
Alex: And haven't met any of his friends, he's possessed by an Alien.
Kyle: Some of the things may not apply to you
Alex: Some of the things may be too late for you
Kyle: But no matter who you are, you must remember this one thing.
Alex: No matter what an Alien tells you
Kyle & Alex: There's no lube on the anal probe.
Kyle & Alex: NONE!
Michael: No lube on the anal probe
Max: No lube on the anal probe
Michael: No lube on the anal probe
Max: No lube on the anal probe
Michael: No lube on the anal probe
Max: No lube on the anal probe
Michael: Can't get none
Max: No…
Michael: Say there's absolutely
Max: Say there's positively
Max & Michael Harmonizing: No lube on the anal probe…
Michael: No lube..
Max: No lube…
Max & Michael: No lube no lube no lube…
Alex: And that's it.
Max: That's scary, and you two wrote that parody together?
Kyle: Yep.
Michael: Not bad.
Alex: Thanks. Well, end of this interlude I guess.
Max: And no Smurfs.
Kyle: Until you mentioned them you dumbass!
Alex: What do you have against Smurfs?
Michael: Just don't like them. And Max had to mention them, for that, he must be ridiculed for his massive man boobs and his Dumbo ears.
Max: Hey.
Michael: Blame it on the Author.
Alex: When the hell did Joss start writing Roswell?
Max: Oh come on, it's not that bad.
Michael: Yeah, they're writing me pretty well.
Kyle: Aren't we just supposed to make fun of the fic?
Alex: Yeah, usually. But I'm so pissed off this week, man, what the hell are they doing?
Michael: Your actor wanted to go make movies probably.
Alex: The prick, ******* Tom Hank's wannabe (rest of Alex's rant on the status of the actor who portrays him has been removed due to the explicit content and graphic nature, this rant also went on to include the actor's parents, the network, the writers and random people Alex thought of)
Kyle: I had no idea you knew that kind of language.
Michael: I had no idea you'd use that kind of language.
Max: What did that one word mean?
Alex Takes Some Deep Calm Soothing Breaths
Alex: @#&(&@$!*($&!$(&#!%(#(!&$(!@*$(*!)#$*#!($&(!%(!#$*(&%!(*^)_$)@^&!#(&$(
Other Three Get Scared And Back Away
Alex: It's okay, I'm calm now. Just when we help Spike hurt Joss, we have to pay a visit to the Roswell people that's all.
Max: Okay…
Kyle: Yeah…
Michael: Uhhuh…
Alex: Really, I'm better now. So, what's this stuff about us crossdressing and singing RHPS songs?
Michael: I don't know, but I hope it's not me. I've done enough humiliating things this fic.
Kyle: Same here.
Max: What, and we haven't?
Kyle & Michael Together: No.
Alex: Shuddup you two. It should be funny to see what Tess and Maria do to you two.
Michael: You know of course that you will get yours.
Kyle: Even if we have to arrange it. This goes for you two Max.
Max: Anyone else notice our interlude here is just us threatening each other?
Alex: Maybe the Author is spiking the air or something. Or we're all just pissed about the last ep.
Michael: I didn't mind it really, Amy liked me.
Alex Hits Michael
Michael: Ow, why am I always getting my ass kicked?
Max: You bring it on yourself.
Kyle: You really do.
Alex: You're our whipping boy. You're a lot like Daniel on Stargate SG-1, you get beat up on and get into trouble get rescued.
Michael: But you all have been in scrapes too.
Max: True, but you're also a good target because you're the most relationshiply challenged one among us.
Michael: So because I'm a crappy boyfriend I'm a target for pain and humiliation?
Kyle, Max & Alex: Yup.
Michael: I'm so screwed.
Kyle: But you look good getting screwed.
Max, Michael & Alex Look At Kyle Oddly
Kyle: NON-SLASHY.
Other Guys Unconvincingly: Uh huh.
Kyle: REALLY.
Other Guys, Still Not Convinced: Sure.
Kyle Pouts
Michael: ANYWAY, what was the Author talking about? What parody of "No Sex In The Champagne Room"?
Alex: Oh, actually that is my and Kyle's fault. We were writing it, I guess the Author is taking credit since in his world we're just fictional characters.
Kyle: The bastard.
Max: So what is it?
Alex: Well, okay, we'll sing it to you. But you need to sing along like was with Chris Rock's version, okay? And don't hurt us until it's done.
Michael: I think I'll regret this, but okay.
Alex: Okay. Kyle, you ready? Let's start.
Alex: Ladies and Geeks with passing marks of the Starfleet Entrance Exam of 2001.
Kyle: We have one piece of advice for you.
Alex: No matter what an alien tells you, there's no lube on the anal probe.
Kyle: None. Sure, your ass is going to get probed, but there's no lube.
Alex: And you want lube, believe us.
Kyle: Don't go with aliens with no corporeal form.
Alex: Sure they look cute and foggy, but they'll probably take over your body.
Kyle: You can fight them on the outside.
Alex: But once in, you just ain't got a chance.
Kyle: If an alien looks 17, and says he's 17, his genetic material is well over 50.
Alex: If a part crazy girl says she 17 and aliens are after her, she's your grand kid.
Kyle: Take off that silly Star Trek t-shirt.
Alex: Aliens couldn't possibly have done all those crop circles.
Kyle: Drunk-ass rednecks did some of that sh*t.
Alex: Young human men out there, if you're dating an alien and she has a mood swing.
Kyle: Don't tell her that her Alien PMS must be kicking in.
Kyle: Tabasco - Ain't nothin' wrong with that.
Alex & Kyle: Remember this one thing, there's no lube on the anal probe.
Max: Ahhhhh…
Michael: No lube on the anal probe
Max: No lube on the anal probe
Michael: No lube on the anal probe
Max: No lube on the anal probe
Michael: No lube on the anal probe
Max: No lube on the anal probe
Together: Noooo….
Alex: If a stranded alien has a funny sign
Kyle: He hasn't been stranded very long
Alex: Really stranded aliens are too busy hiding to be funny
Kyle: If an alien girl groupie has a pierced tongue, she'll probably suck your ****
Michael: That'd be great.
Alex: If an girl Alien has a pierced tongue, she'll probably suck out your brains.
Max: Oh, don't want that, no…
Kyle: Here's a horoscope for everyone.
Alex: Aquarius: You're going to be abducted ya crazies.
Kyle: Capricorn: You're going to be abducted.
Alex: Gemini: You're going to be abducted TWICE.
Kyle: Leo: You're going to be abducted.
Alex: Scorpio: You're going to be abducted and be an Alien Goddess' sex slave.
Michael: Oh yeah…
Alex: No one goes to the Crashdown for hooters.
Max: Hey! Hey! Hey!
Kyle: If you've been dating an older human for months
Alex: And haven't met any of his friends, he's possessed by an Alien.
Kyle: Some of the things may not apply to you
Alex: Some of the things may be too late for you
Kyle: But no matter who you are, you must remember this one thing.
Alex: No matter what an Alien tells you
Kyle & Alex: There's no lube on the anal probe.
Kyle & Alex: NONE!
Michael: No lube on the anal probe
Max: No lube on the anal probe
Michael: No lube on the anal probe
Max: No lube on the anal probe
Michael: No lube on the anal probe
Max: No lube on the anal probe
Michael: Can't get none
Max: No…
Michael: Say there's absolutely
Max: Say there's positively
Max & Michael Harmonizing: No lube on the anal probe…
Michael: No lube..
Max: No lube…
Max & Michael: No lube no lube no lube…
Alex: And that's it.
Max: That's scary, and you two wrote that parody together?
Kyle: Yep.
Michael: Not bad.
Alex: Thanks. Well, end of this interlude I guess.
Max: And no Smurfs.
Kyle: Until you mentioned them you dumbass!
Alex: What do you have against Smurfs?
Michael: Just don't like them. And Max had to mention them, for that, he must be ridiculed for his massive man boobs and his Dumbo ears.
Max: Hey.
Michael: Blame it on the Author.