Part 13, Ver. 3.0 You Were Purttier When I Was Asleep
(Story) Before I allow us to start this part, I must say I am severely hurt by how few of the followers came over, you all don't write anymore, you don't call or sacrifice. It hurts. I'm having to whine here about this, I feel like withholding parts of myself from you all. I should, I really should.
(Author) Story, I'm ashamed of you. You know the rules, you shouldn't do things like that. You'll get us in trouble.
(Story) But you told me to…
(Author) Shush, don't try and shrug off your blame, you shouldn't have done this. I sincerely apologize for the Story's actions, she had no right to do this.
(Story) You sonuva…
(Author) STORY! Watch your mouth, I'm so ashamed of you. Really, just behave and let's get on to the story.
(Story) I'm not going to let you screw me over, you know full well you…
(Author) Padawan.
(Story) Eep. Yes, I'm sorry, I never should have done this. *mutters*Iwillhaverevengeonyou,stupidredneck.*mutter*
(Author) Yes, now on to the story.
Outside the SUV a young woman hung her head violently vomiting, holding on to the SUV to keep her balance. Looking in the back window she saw two men, both naked, spooning in a loving embrace with many odd things scattered beside them. The young woman looked on, smiled and said aloud. "I've been that trashed a few times." Before she again puked.
Suddenly four men in dark suits rushed to her side and began walking her to a tinted and bullet proof limo with little American flags on it. One of them men said "Miss Bush, we must get you home. Your father is expecting you, and you know if you're not there he may do something rash and declare war on California."
"Ya ya, just get some more hooch for me. I'm Jenna Friggin' Bush after all." She said with a large ear shattering belch before exiting the story.
(Story) Oh man, great, now the Secret Service is going to be on our ass.
(Author) Hey, why? I just made a bad joke about Jenna, it's not like it's a threat or a lie or anything.
(Story) Still, when they haul you in and do a full body cavity search I don't want to be blamed.
(Author) Ah, shut up. After your display earlier you should be glad I'm letting you here.
(Story) I hate you, I really do. I hope a cat claws your crotch.
(Author) Owwwww…
Inside the SUV, the two naked, very naked, very naked and.. well, there's this thing that happen to men while they're asleep that is still there when they wake up.. so… They're VERY naked and way too close for comfort when Kyle mumbles "Mmmm, good morning sweetheart."
That sound, of course, woke up Michael. Who quickly discovered that the naked flesh pressed to his back wasn't Maria. In fact, according to one distinct… impression, it wasn't female.
(Story) Oh man, you are so crossing the line.
(Author) That's what I do.
Realizing it was a man who had his arm around him, Michael quickly rolled over, the sudden movement caused Kyle to awaken also. So they both got to look each other in the eye, then down their bodies to see themselves naked, then back to the eyes… and then…
"WHAT THE ****************!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!????????????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!???????????????" was chorused.
Quickly separating, Michael grabbed the inflatable alien sex doll and held it in front of his… well, let's just say it looked very inappropriate. Kyle, on the other hand, grabbed the still slightly frozen chicken to cover up with, which, feeling the cold, he quickly abandoned for the abnormally large zucchini.
(Story) Are you saying he's well endo…
(Author) Shhhhh, watch what you say. And maybe he is, maybe he's not. I'm not going there right now.
(Story) Thank Heaven's for small miracles.
(Author) It wasn't small.
(Story) *weeping* I should have known better.
"What the hell is going on?" Kyle said, as he took in the nudity and all of the odd things scattered around them.
"I have no clue. I remember dancing with Maria, having a drink and them… this…" Michael was not happy, of all the guys to wake up next to it had to be Kyle and not Max.
(Story) Huh?
(Author) Shameless ass kiss to the slash fans of Max and Michael.
(Story) I need Prozac.
"I remember dancing with Tess, having a drink… Oh god, I remember more." Suddenly Kyle remember him and Michael… doing things… things which cannot be mentioned if this fic is to be kept on the board… things that were put in his and Michael's minds by Tess. Michael began remembering too.
"Oh god. We… I mean, you put that… And I did… And the zucchini… And the alien doll with snowballs…" With that, Michael collapsed into a crying heap.
Kyle, soon joined him.
Twenty minutes later, they stopped, found their clothes and got dressed and refused to look at each other. Without saying another word, Kyle drove Michael home and then went home himself. Once there, he took a nice long hot shower, as did Michael at his place
(Story) Why are you breaking the paragraph there?
(Author) Giving them time to imagine Kyle and Michael naked and soaping themselves up.
(Story) You need mental help.
(Author) Everyone says that.
Kyle, having finished his shower walked around the house in nothing but a towel and started wondering just why he did what he did last night. Sitting down he kept running over the images in his mind, as he unconsciously drummed his fingers. Suddenly, the Author had him realize something.
(Story) That's cheap.
(Author) Hey, I like cheap things. Look at you.
(Story) That was rude.
(Author) Aw, you know I love ya.
(Story) You only love me when you want…
(Author) Don't go there.
(Story) Well, technically I'm your typing, and your typing comes from your hands and you…
(Author) You want to try that TPM fic?
(Story) Shutting up sir.
Kyle quickly grabbed the phone and called Michael over to his house, after a little convincing he agreed and was on his way.
Once the two were together Kyle smiled evilly and said the words that men fear, no matter what context. "We need to talk."
(Story) You're ending it there?
(Author) Yep, the next part will be really good.
(Story) Now that's a lie.
(Author) Bite me.
(Story) Before I allow us to start this part, I must say I am severely hurt by how few of the followers came over, you all don't write anymore, you don't call or sacrifice. It hurts. I'm having to whine here about this, I feel like withholding parts of myself from you all. I should, I really should.
(Author) Story, I'm ashamed of you. You know the rules, you shouldn't do things like that. You'll get us in trouble.
(Story) But you told me to…
(Author) Shush, don't try and shrug off your blame, you shouldn't have done this. I sincerely apologize for the Story's actions, she had no right to do this.
(Story) You sonuva…
(Author) STORY! Watch your mouth, I'm so ashamed of you. Really, just behave and let's get on to the story.
(Story) I'm not going to let you screw me over, you know full well you…
(Author) Padawan.
(Story) Eep. Yes, I'm sorry, I never should have done this. *mutters*Iwillhaverevengeonyou,stupidredneck.*mutter*
(Author) Yes, now on to the story.
Outside the SUV a young woman hung her head violently vomiting, holding on to the SUV to keep her balance. Looking in the back window she saw two men, both naked, spooning in a loving embrace with many odd things scattered beside them. The young woman looked on, smiled and said aloud. "I've been that trashed a few times." Before she again puked.
Suddenly four men in dark suits rushed to her side and began walking her to a tinted and bullet proof limo with little American flags on it. One of them men said "Miss Bush, we must get you home. Your father is expecting you, and you know if you're not there he may do something rash and declare war on California."
"Ya ya, just get some more hooch for me. I'm Jenna Friggin' Bush after all." She said with a large ear shattering belch before exiting the story.
(Story) Oh man, great, now the Secret Service is going to be on our ass.
(Author) Hey, why? I just made a bad joke about Jenna, it's not like it's a threat or a lie or anything.
(Story) Still, when they haul you in and do a full body cavity search I don't want to be blamed.
(Author) Ah, shut up. After your display earlier you should be glad I'm letting you here.
(Story) I hate you, I really do. I hope a cat claws your crotch.
(Author) Owwwww…
Inside the SUV, the two naked, very naked, very naked and.. well, there's this thing that happen to men while they're asleep that is still there when they wake up.. so… They're VERY naked and way too close for comfort when Kyle mumbles "Mmmm, good morning sweetheart."
That sound, of course, woke up Michael. Who quickly discovered that the naked flesh pressed to his back wasn't Maria. In fact, according to one distinct… impression, it wasn't female.
(Story) Oh man, you are so crossing the line.
(Author) That's what I do.
Realizing it was a man who had his arm around him, Michael quickly rolled over, the sudden movement caused Kyle to awaken also. So they both got to look each other in the eye, then down their bodies to see themselves naked, then back to the eyes… and then…
"WHAT THE ****************!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!????????????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!???????????????" was chorused.
Quickly separating, Michael grabbed the inflatable alien sex doll and held it in front of his… well, let's just say it looked very inappropriate. Kyle, on the other hand, grabbed the still slightly frozen chicken to cover up with, which, feeling the cold, he quickly abandoned for the abnormally large zucchini.
(Story) Are you saying he's well endo…
(Author) Shhhhh, watch what you say. And maybe he is, maybe he's not. I'm not going there right now.
(Story) Thank Heaven's for small miracles.
(Author) It wasn't small.
(Story) *weeping* I should have known better.
"What the hell is going on?" Kyle said, as he took in the nudity and all of the odd things scattered around them.
"I have no clue. I remember dancing with Maria, having a drink and them… this…" Michael was not happy, of all the guys to wake up next to it had to be Kyle and not Max.
(Story) Huh?
(Author) Shameless ass kiss to the slash fans of Max and Michael.
(Story) I need Prozac.
"I remember dancing with Tess, having a drink… Oh god, I remember more." Suddenly Kyle remember him and Michael… doing things… things which cannot be mentioned if this fic is to be kept on the board… things that were put in his and Michael's minds by Tess. Michael began remembering too.
"Oh god. We… I mean, you put that… And I did… And the zucchini… And the alien doll with snowballs…" With that, Michael collapsed into a crying heap.
Kyle, soon joined him.
Twenty minutes later, they stopped, found their clothes and got dressed and refused to look at each other. Without saying another word, Kyle drove Michael home and then went home himself. Once there, he took a nice long hot shower, as did Michael at his place
(Story) Why are you breaking the paragraph there?
(Author) Giving them time to imagine Kyle and Michael naked and soaping themselves up.
(Story) You need mental help.
(Author) Everyone says that.
Kyle, having finished his shower walked around the house in nothing but a towel and started wondering just why he did what he did last night. Sitting down he kept running over the images in his mind, as he unconsciously drummed his fingers. Suddenly, the Author had him realize something.
(Story) That's cheap.
(Author) Hey, I like cheap things. Look at you.
(Story) That was rude.
(Author) Aw, you know I love ya.
(Story) You only love me when you want…
(Author) Don't go there.
(Story) Well, technically I'm your typing, and your typing comes from your hands and you…
(Author) You want to try that TPM fic?
(Story) Shutting up sir.
Kyle quickly grabbed the phone and called Michael over to his house, after a little convincing he agreed and was on his way.
Once the two were together Kyle smiled evilly and said the words that men fear, no matter what context. "We need to talk."
(Story) You're ending it there?
(Author) Yep, the next part will be really good.
(Story) Now that's a lie.
(Author) Bite me.