ACT TWO
FADE IN:
INT. HAUNTED HOUSE – ANONYMOUS ROOM
The kids are reclined in various positions in the room. Sitting in a chair, standing by a fireplace, on the floor, etc. They are apparently taking a break from trying to find a way out of the house.
Matt and Lanny have dug into their trick-or-treat bags and are munching on their candy. Miranda has 'appropriated' Gordo's and is eating its contents.
Lizzie is visibly frustrated.
LIZZIE
Tell me Gordo, what happened to that brilliant theory of yours that somebody lived here?
GORDO
Eh, I was wrong. So sue me.
LIZZIE
Ugh! There's got to be a way out of here!
GORDO
Of course there is. We just haven't found it yet.
LIZZIE
We can't keep searching rooms all night.
MIRANDA
Not to mention that our parents will kill us if we're out too late.
GORDO
(sarcastically)
All right, all right. Here's the new plan. Matt, you shimmy up the fireplace here and get out on the roof. From there you leap in the branches of a neighboring tree, and then slide down and get help.
(beat)
There, happy?
MIRANDA
Not particularly.
GORDO
Yeah, well, too bad.
LIZZIE
Look guys, fighting isn't going to get us anywhere. Let's just keep looking.
MIRANDA
(de sotto voice)
Like I haven't heard that for the umpteenth time…
LIZZIE
Miranda!
MIRANDA
Sorry, sorry.
Matt and Lanny pick up their bags and the group makes its way out of the room.
CUT TO:
INT. NANA AND GRANDPA CHUCK'S HOUSE – LIVING ROOM
Sam and Jo are taking a brief rest from helping Nana and Grandpa Chuck.
SAM
You think we should call the kids?
JO
They're probably still out trick-or-treating. Let them have some fun. We'll be home soon enough.
SAM
(smiling)
Yeah, they're probably having the time of their lives.
CUT TO:
INT. HAUNTED HOUSE – HALLWAY
Miranda and Matt are in a tug of war match over his trick-or-treat bag. She's already polished off Gordo's.
ANIMATED LIZZIE
Either we get out of here soon or we'll be putting on our own production of "Alive"!
GORDO
We've searched downstairs. We've searched upstairs. We've searched bedrooms, and living rooms, and bathrooms, and closets. We've searched high and low.
ANIMATED LIZZIE
And I've seen enough cobwebs to last me a lifetime.
GORDO
All that is left is the attic.
MIRANDA
The attic? What are we going to find up there? It's the highest point in the house!
GORDO
I know, I know. But it's the only place we haven't tried yet. You have a better idea?
MIRANDA
No.
GORDO
There you go.
LIZZIE
It's worth a shot.
GORDO
(to Lizzie)
After you.
Lizzie leads them down to the far end of the hallway where the next flight of stairs are located.
MATT
Lanny and I'd just like to go on record as not liking this idea.
LIZZIE
Well, none of us do. But it's the only one we've got.
CUT TO:
INT. HAUNTED HOUSE - STAIRWELL
The gang climbs the stairs only to stop before a door.
GORDO
The attic.
MIRANDA
You don't say…
Lizzie turns the doorknob and opens the door slowly. The kids peer into the room before filing in.
CUT TO:
INT. HAUNTED HOUSE – ATTIC
LIZZIE
Stick together.
MIRANDA
You don't have to tell me twice.
They creep along cautiously—all the while the door is slowly swinging shut behind them until finally it does so with a faint 'click'.
MATT
(hearing the door shut)
What was that?
GORDO
It sounded like the door.
He goes to check it out.
MIRANDA
Don't tell me. Don't tell me…
GORDO
It's locked.
MIRANDA
I told you not to tell me!
ANIMATED LIZZIE
This cannot be happening!
LIZZIE
That just means we have to find a way out up here.
ANIMATED LIZZIE
Or it could mean that we're doomed!
They all start searching around.
GORDO
See if you can find a ladder, or some rope or something.
MATT
Here's a ball of string.
ANIMATED LIZZIE
Great. We can knit our way out of here.
LIZZIE
Oh! Here's something!
She pulls out what looks to be part of a pair of stilts.
LIZZIE (CONT'D)
It looks like a stilt.
MIRANDA
If we have to we can always pole vault our way out of here…
Lizzie shoots her a look and continues rummaging around.
Unnoticed, Matt leans back against the wall to wipe his brow. When he does so the wall swings open behind him—causing him to fall back into a secret passage. Before he can say anything, the wall swings back into place trapping him behind it. After a little while Lizzie notices Matt is gone.
LIZZIE
Where's Matt?
Confused, they all look around.
LIZZIE
Lanny, did you see where Matt went?
Lanny shakes his head.
LIZZIE
(calling out)
Matt!
A pounding sound begins behind the walls—the kids all jump as one.
MIRANDA
(scared)
What's that?
LIZZIE
I don't know.
(beat)
Matt!
The pounding sound increases in tempo.
GORDO
Matt, is that you?
The pounding picks up another notch.
LIZZIE
It must be him. Matt, where are you?
Nothing but more pounding.
GORDO
Sounds like it's coming from the walls.
Gordo starts feeling the walls.
LIZZIE
Matt, can you hear me?
More pounding.
GORDO
Wait. I think it's coming from over here.
Gordo presses himself closer to the spot on the wall when the wall swings open again, surprising him and Matt.
LIZZIE
Matt! How did you get in there?
MATT
I don't know. One second I'm leaning against the wall, and the next I'm back here.
GORDO
It's a secret passage.
He starts to inspect it.
GORDO (CONT'D)
It looks like a hallway. We should explore it.
MIRANDA
Uh, uh. I'm not going in there. It's creepy, it's dark—
GORDO
(interrupting)
It's maybe a way out.
MIRANDA
Out of my way.
She shoves her way through to the forefront.
ANIMATED LIZZIE
As if this place wasn't scary enough as it is. Now it's got secret passageways? Normal people don't build secret passageways into their homes!
The gang walk down the darkened hallway huddled together.
CUT TO:
INT. HAUNTED HOUSE – SECRET PASSAGEWAY
MATT
Do we know where we're going?
GORDO
Not a clue.
MIRANDA
Well, it better lead to a way out. I can't stand much more of this.
ANIMATED LIZZIE
She can't stand much more? What about me?
GORDO
Hey, does anyone else feel that?
LIZZIE
Feel what Gordo?
GORDO
It feels like a breeze.
MIRANDA
It must be coming from outside!
Miranda pulls farther ahead.
LIZZIE
Miranda! Wait!
Lizzie and the others hurry up to catch up with Miranda.
They all come out into some sort of laboratory, all cobweb strewn. Typical 'Mad Scientist' set up. Test tubes, electrodes, etc.
CUT TO:
INT. HAUNTED HOUSE – SECRET LABORATORY
MIRANDA
(re: laboratory)
Oh, I know this can't be good.
GORDO
(fascinated)
It looks like some kind of laboratory.
LIZZIE
We can see that Gordo. The question is what is it doing here?
MATT
Who cares? Is it a way out?
GORDO
Doesn't look it. Though that explains the breeze.
Gordo points to a large overhead fan set into the ceiling. They can see the night sky behind the screen mesh.
MIRANDA
Ugh!
In frustration, Miranda stomps her foot. In doing so she triggers a trap door beneath her to spring open—leaving her to fall down a shoot to depths unknown.
MIRANDA
Ahhhh!
LIZZIE
Miranda!
They all rush to the edge of the trap door and peer down, but it's too dark to see anything.
GORDO
Miranda! Are you all right?
They wait anxiously to hear some sign of their friend. A weak groan reaches their ears.
LIZZIE
Miranda?
MIRANDA
I'm okay.
LIZZIE
Where are you?
MIRANDA
I don't know.
GORDO
Hold on, we're coming down.
Gordo positions himself over the hole and slides down. The others follow suite. They all land in a pile of old sackcloth. The room itself looks to be some sort of old stable.
CUT TO:
INT. HAUNTED HOUSE – OLD STABLES
LIZZIE
What is this place?
GORDO
An old stable. It's where they kept the horses before there were cars. This house must be old. I guess they must have built over it over the years.
MIRANDA
Well, if it's a stable, then that must mean there's a way for the animals to get out, right?
GORDO
Mmmm, no. Did any of you see a stable outside?
They all shake their heads.
GORDO (CONT'D)
My point exactly. This place has been built over.
LIZZIE
But there must be some opening to the outside. After all, we have enough light to see by.
GORDO
(pondering)
Good point.
MIRANDA
Alright then. Let's get looking.
They all start looking around. Lanny moves a broken crate, which hits an old sweeper broom, which in turn disturbs a bat that had been roosting. The bat flies out and all sorts of commotion ensues.
GORDO
It's a bat!
LIZZIE
A bat?
CUT TO:
A SHORT MUSCIAL MONTAGE:
The gang is running to and fro trying to get away from the bat.
Finally, the bat flies out through an old drain of some sort at ground level. It's small, but just large enough for some kids to fit through.
End of Montage
CUT TO:
INT. HAUNTED HOUSE – OLD STABLES
GORDO
It's gone. It's gone.
He notices the drain it flew out.
GORDO (CONT'D)
Hey, look! It's a drain hole!
LIZZIE
And it looks like it opens out on ground level!
MATT
But is it big enough for us to fit through?
MIRANDA
Only one way to find out!
She rushes over to the drain.
MIRANDA (CONT'D)
Someone give me a boost.
Gordo and Lizzie help Miranda up to the drain.
GORDO
See anything?
MIRANDA
I can see stars!
ANIMATED LIZZIE
That's encouraging!
MIRANDA
There's some kind of grate, but it looks loose. I think I can lift it.
GORDO
Great!
MIRANDA
There, got it!
Miranda climbs out through the drain.
CUT TO:
EXT. YARD – NIGHT
Miranda helps Lizzie out, followed by Gordo and the rest.
MATT
Freedom!
LIZZIE
Whew! Am I ever glad to be out of there.
MIRANDA
Let's vamoose before something else happens!
GORDO
Didn't this experience teach you anything?
MIRANDA
Yeah, not to go into spooky old haunted houses!
GORDO
Miranda, there's no such thing as ghosts and goblins.
LIZZIE
I don't know Gordo. We all saw things we can't explain.
GORDO
That's ridiculous. We allowed our imaginations to run away with us. There were perfectly logical explanations for everything that went on in there.
MATT
Then what about all those secret corridors and hidden rooms?
GORDO
So the person who built the house was paranoid. That doesn't make it 'supernatural'.
MIRANDA
Okay Gordo, maybe it wasn't haunted. But still, even you have to admit things weren't normal.
GORDO
I'll admit that it was a bit… out of the ordinary. But there are no monsters. Okay?
MIRANDA
(reluctantly)
Okay.
LIZZIE
Okay.
MATT
Okay.
Lanny motions his acquiescence.
GORDO
Finally. There are no such things as monsters.
At that moment a horrible bug headed monster rounds the curb coming straight for the kids, beckoning to them.
LIZZIE/MIRANDA/GORDO/MATT
AHHHHHHHH!
They all scream and run off as fast as they can.
The 'creature' takes off its head to reveal LARRY TUDGEMAN in a costume.
TUDGEMAN
(confused)
Guys?
FADE OUT:
END OF EPISODE