"It was the day she broke me heart", Jack began dramatically. Making it
difficult to tell whether he was being serious or not. Now it was
Julianne's turn to roll her eyes and huff.
"Now this goes way back, this one does", Jack continued ignoring her sounds of protest. Before both of them last two you 'eard. Wasn't quite a year after I'ad become cap'n o' the Pearl, and both our ships were docked at Tortuga."
~~~
Julianne lay awake in her bed in her father's house staring into the blackness of night. Next to her, Jack lay curled up against her, his head below her's. She absentmindedly ran her hand back and forth across his exposed arm as she thought to herself. This trip to Tortuga was the first time they'd been together since both becoming captain of their respective ship. The only problem was, Julianne knew Jack was captain, but Jack didn't know she was.
She didn't like lying to him, but things were more complicated than Julianne would have liked. In the recent months since taking command of the Renegade, Julianne's had made some uncomfortable discoveries about her new position. As if being a woman pirate wasn't hard enough, being a captain seemed nigh impossible. When it came to being a crewmember, she had had the advantage of her father. Even without it, she had worked hard and proved her worth one hundred times over, in turn gaining her place on the ship and the respect of her crewmates. There wasn't one man on the Renegade that wouldn't go to the depths for her. Or one woman for that matter.
But when it came to the rest of the pirating world, Julianne soon found that everyone else was not so readily accepting of her. She learned quickly that even at the expense of a few other ground breaking women out there, while woman pirates could be tolerated by some, women captains surely could not. She would change all that, Julianne vowed to herself. Julianne Amaris would make a name so great for herself, that it would instill fear into the very hearts of those that heard it. She would be a legend, a pirate captain so fierce, she would rule by reputation alone. She would conquer the world, but it would take time. Time, effort, and something else. It would take deceit. So she made a decision. In order to achieve her goals she would disown her identity. In order to prove them wrong, she would hide the very thing she wanted them to see. It would not be Julianne Amaris who captained the Renegade, it would be Captain Jay Amaris. And she would stick to that until she had made such a name for herself that it wouldn't matter who she was.
It was a decision that ruled her actions uncharacteristically. She was proud, and it was against all her will that she concealed her true self when all she wanted to do was flaunt it unrelentlessly. But for her own safety, and that of her crew she carried on with it. Never referring to her real first name she always went by Captain Jay, nor did she ever walk off the ship like a true captain when they docked. For the first few years of her captainship, there wasn't a sole alive save for her crew that had any idea who she really was. And she ruled the seas with an iron fist. Preying on ships and settlements with a ferociousness greater than any before her. And it worked, everywhere they docked rumors flew and people wondered, who was this new young captain whom Mendoza had entrusted his ship to?
Within those few short first years Julianne was presented with more than enough opportunities to show herself, to prove her worth to the world. Yet she declined. Her identity, or lack thereof, had become like a security blanket for her. And the mystery of it all only added to the awe that surrounded her ship. In time, through business deals and 'professional contacts', most of the other pirate captains came to know her true character, but to the commoner and lowly crew members, she remained a mystery for years.
And so it was that she lay there in bed that night, Jack's one arm wrapped around her, that she turned all of this over in her head. She wondered why she hadn't told Jack. It wasn't that she couldn't trust him. He was probably the one person she trusted of all. She trusted him with her life, she trusted him with her heart. But, therein lay the problem. She was the captain of a pirate ship. And while it was true that most captains got away with bending the rules a bit, if Julianne had any hopes of achieving the reputation she had planned, she could not afford to be having people thinking she was the strumpet of any man, regardless of the actual facts of the matter.
It was a tough spot that she now found herself in. With each passing visit she and Jack shared, she found herself falling more and more in love with him, despite her best efforts to deny it in favor that he was just another bed partner. She wondered how long they could go on like this, spending every waking moment together when it worked out, and pretending Jack didn't exist when they were apart. Until recently, it was a good system, but now, as her solid façade began to crack, Julianne knew it was time for another decision to be made in her life that seemed to revolve around these decisions.
Climbing slowly out of bed, making sure not to wake Jack, Julianne crept slowly to the closet and got dressed in the dark. She exited the bedroom and sat herself down at the kitchen table, lighting a single, small candle. Grabbing a piece of parchment and some ink, she stared thoughtfully at the paper for a minute before scrawling out a short note. Upon finishing, she got back up, put on her jacket and grabbed her affects. She walked back into the bedroom and set the note on the pillow next to Jack's head. Giving him one last kiss on the forehead, she walked back to the table, extinguished the candle, and silently exited through the front door. By the time Jack woke a few hours later, the Renegade was miles from the Tortuga harbor.
***
Jack awoke to bright light shining in his face from every window. Rolling over with a groan, he opened his eyes when he realized something was quite amiss. He was alone. Looking around, he peered out into the kitchen to see if Julianne had gotten up already but found the house silent. Perplexed, he rested his chin in his hand in wonder, and then saw the parchment folded up on what had been Julianne's pillow. He snatched up and tore it open unceremoniously. He smiled at the note's opening, but his grin quickly faded.
Jack, correction CAPTAIN Jack Sparrow-
I've loved every minute that I've spent with you, but the Renegade calls, and I have had to choose, you or her. I should have told you the truth so many years ago. I'm sorry Jack, please understand that I did not mean for things to end up this way, I was just trying to protect myself in a harsh world. And now I have no choice, I am bound to her as you to the Pearl.
Goodbye Jack- Captain Julianne Amaris
Jack stared at the letter in shock for several minutes, reading and rereading its contents. He could not believe it, any of it. Not just that she had left, but that in all the years he had known her he had never once questioned her allusiveness when it came to her background and any business regarding the Renegade.
Now, as he continued to stare at the scrap of paper in his hand, everything began to come together. He had heard the rumors of the Renegade's new captain. Jay something or other. He had meant to ask Julianne about it while they were both here, but they had been too busy with other things that he'd forgotten. Now it hit him like a ton of bricks. J Amaris, Julianne Amaris. Why didn't he see it before?
As he lay there brooding over it, another thought began to plague him as well. So what if she was captain, why didn't she just tell him? She could trust him after all couldn't she? And why did she have to pick between him or the ship? All pirates had personal exploits, especially captains. So maybe they weren't usually with other pirates, but it was all in good fun. Wasn't it? The more Jack thought about it, the more confused, hurt, and angry he got.
***
Jack stomped onto the main deck of the Pearl and looked around. Much to his luck, most of his crew was already assembled there, attempting to recover from the previous night's activities.
"Hey William", the young captain called to the older man, his mentor as it were.
"Aye Jackie?"
Jack rolled his eyes slightly at this but did not protest. Had it been any other man on deck and he would have socked them right in the mouth.
"Round up the rest o' the crew. I want to be out o' 'ere within the hour."
"Aye Cap'n. Where're we goin, if I might ask?"
"I've got some business to take care of. Won't take long. We should be back within a day or two to plan our next adventure."
Bootstrap nodded and headed down the plank to carry out his captain's orders. Surveying his crew once again, Jack sighed at their sorry state, then headed for his quarters. For his part, he really had no idea what he planned on doing. All he knew was that he was going after Julianne. What he would say or do when he found her he was not sure, but she was not leaving him.
True to his word, within less than an hour Bootstrap was back on board, every crew member accounted for. Many of them less than happy at their captain's sudden call. A few grumbled with annoyance, first mate Barbossa among the loudest. Purposefully, he strode to the helm where Jack stood guiding the ship along through the calm waters.
"This is ridiculous Cap'n, if I may be so bold", he barked at the younger man. "You mean to send us off, with no direction or course of action, and for apparently no reason whatsoever."
"Mate", Jack said turning to him with narrowed eyes. "Just because ye don't know me reasons or course of action, doesn't mean I'aven't got em."
Defeated, the first mate turned, and angrily stalked back down to the main deck. *How long must we suffer his incorrigible idiocy*, he wondered to himself.
***
It did not take long for the Pearl to catch up to the Renegade. As Jack had guessed, Julianne sailed without urgency, heading for the northern mainland where she often liked to spend time ashore. Sighting her ship in the distance, Jack pulled out his telescope and surveyed the ship. Sure enough, Julianne stood at the helm, though were it not for her blonde hair he never would have known. She had traded her typical garb for a long blue jacket much like his own, and a worn leather hat, looking completely unlike he had ever seen her.
Adrenaline surging through him at the realization that he had made it, he called to the crew to put out the oars and get them up to the Renegade.
"Run out the sweeps mates", his voice bellowed across the decks.
On the deck of the Renegade, Dipst caught sight of a ship approaching in the distance. "Cap'n, we've got company", he yelled to Julianne pointing behind her.
Turning around, she felt the pit of her stomach twist into a knot at the sight of the Black Pearl. Turning back to face her crew, she took a deep breath to calm herself and analyzed the situation. There was no hope of outrunning the Pearl, and she was gaining on them fast. She knew they were in no danger of attack, but surveying her crew, she grimaced at the thought of Jack embarrassing her in front of them.
"Not to worry mates, just the Black Pearl."
They all looked at her in confusion.
"How d'ye know they don't mean to be aggressive", Dipst asked curiously. Thankful that none of them were aware of the nature of her and Jack's acquaintance, she answered casually.
"What reason would they have to be so? Captain Sparrow knows we've just left port and are quite empty of any loot. Can't very well be gettin anything from us now can he?"
Dipst nodded, accepting her answer somewhat skeptically.
"Back about yer business ya scallywags", Julianne now barked to those who were still looking at her. "Slow us up a bit but don't drop anchor." They all obeyed and hurried to work. Turning back to the Pearl, Juliann's face hardened as she prepared for the worst. She was angry, no angry was an understatement. She was furious. Hadn't he gotten the message? Why was he following her now when it had been hard enough to go in the first place? Did he understand the delicate position she was in?
Back on the Pearl, Jack smiled eerily as his ship reached her's.
"Turn your ship back Captain, you seek what you cannot have!" Julianne's voice yelled menacingly at him. But Jack paid no heed to the warning, and as the Black Pearl pulled up to the Renegade, he jumped from the deck of one ship to the other. Swaggering up to the helm where Julianne stood with her sword drawn, Jack flashed a gold and white smile.
"And who's to stop me from having what I seek?" he asked confidently giving her a wink.
Captain Amaris stared at Jack with contempt but after a backwards glance toward her crew, her look changed to one of pain and pleading. "Please don't do this Jack", she said softly, her gaze shifting towards the ground. "It's already 'ard enough."
The confident smile on Jack's face began to fade into a look of concern. "Just tell me why, why did you do it?"
Her mind reeled as pain tugged at her heart, and she stood silent for several minutes. She opened her mouth to speak, but choked on the words. Finally, raising her head, she looked straight into Jack's eyes and answered. "Because I was falling in love with you."
Captain Jack Sparrow could remember every occasion in his life where he had been left speechless, and this time definitely topped them all. At once he was over come by almost a hundred emotions which he could make no sense of at all. He opened his mouth attempting to piece together something intelligible or even slightly charming to say but was too overwhelmed and lowered his gaze.
Juli took advantage of the situation and continued.
"Please, don't do this to me. Just understand and let it be. Just leave and forget about it. It's what's best, we both know it."
At this his head shot up defiantly. "Just forget about it", he said raising his voice, and causing Juli to turn around and make sure her crew was still at work. Those who had stopped to watch, quickly averted their attention under her gaze.
"Just forget about it", he repeated quieter. "I might 'ave been able to do that if ye 'and't just said that first part, the part about bein in love with me."
"I did not say I was in love with you", she snapped back. "I said I was fallin for ye. There's a difference. Falling can be stopped before any harm's done, and that's my plan. Savvy?"
Hurt, shocked, and confused, Jack put his hands together, gave Julianne a little bow, turned on his heel and headed back for the Pearl.
The crew of the Renegade stood bewildered as they watched at the receding ship sail away without so much as an idea of why it had come at all. Still standing at the helm, Captain J. Amaris gripped the wheel as she stared off at the Pearl, and felt her heart breaking.
~~~
When Jack finished recounting his tale, no one spoke. Will and Elizabeth looked at each other while Julianne concentrated intently on the little bit of rum that she swirled around in her bottle. Taking in everyone's uncomfortable reaction, Jack rose and walked over to the desk where he sat on its edge. Reaching inside his jacket, he fished around for a moment before pulling his hand out. Looking up, Julianne noticed that he clutched a small, tattered piece of paper. Taking it from him gingerly, her eyes grew wide when she realized what it was.
"Jack", she exclaimed in barely a whisper, looking up at him.
Exchanging a knowing glance, Will and Elizabeth took this as their cue to leave. Getting up, they quietly made their way to the door.
"Where're ye goin", Julianne asked, tearing her attention from Jack.
Elizabeth opened her mouth to answer, but Will cut her off before she said anything too misgiving.
"We're going to call it a night. It's getting pretty late. Though we hope to continue this conversation tomorrow if you'd be so obliged."
"Aye, we'd be."
"Goodnight then."
"Goodnight kiddies", Jack called as they shut the door behind them.
Julianne now turned her attention back to Jack. "Why did you keep this?"
"Considered it me motivation."
"Motivation for what?"
"Motivation to keep it from comin true."
At this, a change came over Julianne. For a rare moment, the harsh and commanding look of her weather touched and tanned face melted away, revealing a softer, young woman. It was the Julianne Jack had known all those years ago before the hardships of being a pirate had made her callous and stern. She stood up from her seat, paper still in hand, and came to stand in front of where Jack still sat on her desk. Looking straight into his eyes, she bit her lip unconsciously, trying to decide what to say. Words failed her, and she felt tears beginning to form in the corner of her eyes.
Whether it was to hide her tears or for lack of the right thing to say, Julianne gave up on explanations and threw her arms around Jack in a tight hug.
"I'm so sorry Jack", she began after a minute.
"Sorry for what luv", he asked into her hair.
"I've been so horrible. I've never once let you forget the shitty things you've done, and I 'aven't been any better. I left you like that so many times, and you came after me every single one of them. How could you even put up with me?"
"Stop being ridiculous", Jack answered softly. "You act like I've done no wrong. It's been equal between us, with everything. I come after you when you leave, and you take me back when I mess up royally."
Pulling back, she looked at him unconvinced.
"Besides", he added with a grin. "Ye usually only leave me when I've done something to deserve it anyway."
His comment achieved its goal when she smiled. "Now enough of this", he continued, wiping underneath both of her eyes. "As much as I'd like to cherish the moment because it's such a rare thing, I can't say I'm entirely used to this whole sentimental side of ye. Buck up Cap'n", he barked taking her firmly by both shoulders.
Julianne sighed with a small smile and punched him lightly in the stomach.
"Oh, you'll pay for that", Jack threatened. Pulling her to him roughly, he looked at her with a grin for just a moment before his lips touched hers.
"It's not a punishment if the person enjoys it Jack", she laughed at him afterwards.
"Call it what you will", he replied jumping up. Taking the piece of paper back from her, he carefully folded it back up and put it in the pocket from whence it came. Turning back to Julianne, he smiled mischievously. Julianne raised her eyebrows in suspicion, but they grew wide when Jack unexpectedly swung his arms around her and picked her up.
"Jack", she exclaimed with a laugh.
"Ye want to see punishment", he asked lightly. "I'm all for showing ye luv", he finished as he walked from the front of the cabin to Juli's bedroom and dropped her lightly on the bed.
"Now this goes way back, this one does", Jack continued ignoring her sounds of protest. Before both of them last two you 'eard. Wasn't quite a year after I'ad become cap'n o' the Pearl, and both our ships were docked at Tortuga."
~~~
Julianne lay awake in her bed in her father's house staring into the blackness of night. Next to her, Jack lay curled up against her, his head below her's. She absentmindedly ran her hand back and forth across his exposed arm as she thought to herself. This trip to Tortuga was the first time they'd been together since both becoming captain of their respective ship. The only problem was, Julianne knew Jack was captain, but Jack didn't know she was.
She didn't like lying to him, but things were more complicated than Julianne would have liked. In the recent months since taking command of the Renegade, Julianne's had made some uncomfortable discoveries about her new position. As if being a woman pirate wasn't hard enough, being a captain seemed nigh impossible. When it came to being a crewmember, she had had the advantage of her father. Even without it, she had worked hard and proved her worth one hundred times over, in turn gaining her place on the ship and the respect of her crewmates. There wasn't one man on the Renegade that wouldn't go to the depths for her. Or one woman for that matter.
But when it came to the rest of the pirating world, Julianne soon found that everyone else was not so readily accepting of her. She learned quickly that even at the expense of a few other ground breaking women out there, while woman pirates could be tolerated by some, women captains surely could not. She would change all that, Julianne vowed to herself. Julianne Amaris would make a name so great for herself, that it would instill fear into the very hearts of those that heard it. She would be a legend, a pirate captain so fierce, she would rule by reputation alone. She would conquer the world, but it would take time. Time, effort, and something else. It would take deceit. So she made a decision. In order to achieve her goals she would disown her identity. In order to prove them wrong, she would hide the very thing she wanted them to see. It would not be Julianne Amaris who captained the Renegade, it would be Captain Jay Amaris. And she would stick to that until she had made such a name for herself that it wouldn't matter who she was.
It was a decision that ruled her actions uncharacteristically. She was proud, and it was against all her will that she concealed her true self when all she wanted to do was flaunt it unrelentlessly. But for her own safety, and that of her crew she carried on with it. Never referring to her real first name she always went by Captain Jay, nor did she ever walk off the ship like a true captain when they docked. For the first few years of her captainship, there wasn't a sole alive save for her crew that had any idea who she really was. And she ruled the seas with an iron fist. Preying on ships and settlements with a ferociousness greater than any before her. And it worked, everywhere they docked rumors flew and people wondered, who was this new young captain whom Mendoza had entrusted his ship to?
Within those few short first years Julianne was presented with more than enough opportunities to show herself, to prove her worth to the world. Yet she declined. Her identity, or lack thereof, had become like a security blanket for her. And the mystery of it all only added to the awe that surrounded her ship. In time, through business deals and 'professional contacts', most of the other pirate captains came to know her true character, but to the commoner and lowly crew members, she remained a mystery for years.
And so it was that she lay there in bed that night, Jack's one arm wrapped around her, that she turned all of this over in her head. She wondered why she hadn't told Jack. It wasn't that she couldn't trust him. He was probably the one person she trusted of all. She trusted him with her life, she trusted him with her heart. But, therein lay the problem. She was the captain of a pirate ship. And while it was true that most captains got away with bending the rules a bit, if Julianne had any hopes of achieving the reputation she had planned, she could not afford to be having people thinking she was the strumpet of any man, regardless of the actual facts of the matter.
It was a tough spot that she now found herself in. With each passing visit she and Jack shared, she found herself falling more and more in love with him, despite her best efforts to deny it in favor that he was just another bed partner. She wondered how long they could go on like this, spending every waking moment together when it worked out, and pretending Jack didn't exist when they were apart. Until recently, it was a good system, but now, as her solid façade began to crack, Julianne knew it was time for another decision to be made in her life that seemed to revolve around these decisions.
Climbing slowly out of bed, making sure not to wake Jack, Julianne crept slowly to the closet and got dressed in the dark. She exited the bedroom and sat herself down at the kitchen table, lighting a single, small candle. Grabbing a piece of parchment and some ink, she stared thoughtfully at the paper for a minute before scrawling out a short note. Upon finishing, she got back up, put on her jacket and grabbed her affects. She walked back into the bedroom and set the note on the pillow next to Jack's head. Giving him one last kiss on the forehead, she walked back to the table, extinguished the candle, and silently exited through the front door. By the time Jack woke a few hours later, the Renegade was miles from the Tortuga harbor.
***
Jack awoke to bright light shining in his face from every window. Rolling over with a groan, he opened his eyes when he realized something was quite amiss. He was alone. Looking around, he peered out into the kitchen to see if Julianne had gotten up already but found the house silent. Perplexed, he rested his chin in his hand in wonder, and then saw the parchment folded up on what had been Julianne's pillow. He snatched up and tore it open unceremoniously. He smiled at the note's opening, but his grin quickly faded.
Jack, correction CAPTAIN Jack Sparrow-
I've loved every minute that I've spent with you, but the Renegade calls, and I have had to choose, you or her. I should have told you the truth so many years ago. I'm sorry Jack, please understand that I did not mean for things to end up this way, I was just trying to protect myself in a harsh world. And now I have no choice, I am bound to her as you to the Pearl.
Goodbye Jack- Captain Julianne Amaris
Jack stared at the letter in shock for several minutes, reading and rereading its contents. He could not believe it, any of it. Not just that she had left, but that in all the years he had known her he had never once questioned her allusiveness when it came to her background and any business regarding the Renegade.
Now, as he continued to stare at the scrap of paper in his hand, everything began to come together. He had heard the rumors of the Renegade's new captain. Jay something or other. He had meant to ask Julianne about it while they were both here, but they had been too busy with other things that he'd forgotten. Now it hit him like a ton of bricks. J Amaris, Julianne Amaris. Why didn't he see it before?
As he lay there brooding over it, another thought began to plague him as well. So what if she was captain, why didn't she just tell him? She could trust him after all couldn't she? And why did she have to pick between him or the ship? All pirates had personal exploits, especially captains. So maybe they weren't usually with other pirates, but it was all in good fun. Wasn't it? The more Jack thought about it, the more confused, hurt, and angry he got.
***
Jack stomped onto the main deck of the Pearl and looked around. Much to his luck, most of his crew was already assembled there, attempting to recover from the previous night's activities.
"Hey William", the young captain called to the older man, his mentor as it were.
"Aye Jackie?"
Jack rolled his eyes slightly at this but did not protest. Had it been any other man on deck and he would have socked them right in the mouth.
"Round up the rest o' the crew. I want to be out o' 'ere within the hour."
"Aye Cap'n. Where're we goin, if I might ask?"
"I've got some business to take care of. Won't take long. We should be back within a day or two to plan our next adventure."
Bootstrap nodded and headed down the plank to carry out his captain's orders. Surveying his crew once again, Jack sighed at their sorry state, then headed for his quarters. For his part, he really had no idea what he planned on doing. All he knew was that he was going after Julianne. What he would say or do when he found her he was not sure, but she was not leaving him.
True to his word, within less than an hour Bootstrap was back on board, every crew member accounted for. Many of them less than happy at their captain's sudden call. A few grumbled with annoyance, first mate Barbossa among the loudest. Purposefully, he strode to the helm where Jack stood guiding the ship along through the calm waters.
"This is ridiculous Cap'n, if I may be so bold", he barked at the younger man. "You mean to send us off, with no direction or course of action, and for apparently no reason whatsoever."
"Mate", Jack said turning to him with narrowed eyes. "Just because ye don't know me reasons or course of action, doesn't mean I'aven't got em."
Defeated, the first mate turned, and angrily stalked back down to the main deck. *How long must we suffer his incorrigible idiocy*, he wondered to himself.
***
It did not take long for the Pearl to catch up to the Renegade. As Jack had guessed, Julianne sailed without urgency, heading for the northern mainland where she often liked to spend time ashore. Sighting her ship in the distance, Jack pulled out his telescope and surveyed the ship. Sure enough, Julianne stood at the helm, though were it not for her blonde hair he never would have known. She had traded her typical garb for a long blue jacket much like his own, and a worn leather hat, looking completely unlike he had ever seen her.
Adrenaline surging through him at the realization that he had made it, he called to the crew to put out the oars and get them up to the Renegade.
"Run out the sweeps mates", his voice bellowed across the decks.
On the deck of the Renegade, Dipst caught sight of a ship approaching in the distance. "Cap'n, we've got company", he yelled to Julianne pointing behind her.
Turning around, she felt the pit of her stomach twist into a knot at the sight of the Black Pearl. Turning back to face her crew, she took a deep breath to calm herself and analyzed the situation. There was no hope of outrunning the Pearl, and she was gaining on them fast. She knew they were in no danger of attack, but surveying her crew, she grimaced at the thought of Jack embarrassing her in front of them.
"Not to worry mates, just the Black Pearl."
They all looked at her in confusion.
"How d'ye know they don't mean to be aggressive", Dipst asked curiously. Thankful that none of them were aware of the nature of her and Jack's acquaintance, she answered casually.
"What reason would they have to be so? Captain Sparrow knows we've just left port and are quite empty of any loot. Can't very well be gettin anything from us now can he?"
Dipst nodded, accepting her answer somewhat skeptically.
"Back about yer business ya scallywags", Julianne now barked to those who were still looking at her. "Slow us up a bit but don't drop anchor." They all obeyed and hurried to work. Turning back to the Pearl, Juliann's face hardened as she prepared for the worst. She was angry, no angry was an understatement. She was furious. Hadn't he gotten the message? Why was he following her now when it had been hard enough to go in the first place? Did he understand the delicate position she was in?
Back on the Pearl, Jack smiled eerily as his ship reached her's.
"Turn your ship back Captain, you seek what you cannot have!" Julianne's voice yelled menacingly at him. But Jack paid no heed to the warning, and as the Black Pearl pulled up to the Renegade, he jumped from the deck of one ship to the other. Swaggering up to the helm where Julianne stood with her sword drawn, Jack flashed a gold and white smile.
"And who's to stop me from having what I seek?" he asked confidently giving her a wink.
Captain Amaris stared at Jack with contempt but after a backwards glance toward her crew, her look changed to one of pain and pleading. "Please don't do this Jack", she said softly, her gaze shifting towards the ground. "It's already 'ard enough."
The confident smile on Jack's face began to fade into a look of concern. "Just tell me why, why did you do it?"
Her mind reeled as pain tugged at her heart, and she stood silent for several minutes. She opened her mouth to speak, but choked on the words. Finally, raising her head, she looked straight into Jack's eyes and answered. "Because I was falling in love with you."
Captain Jack Sparrow could remember every occasion in his life where he had been left speechless, and this time definitely topped them all. At once he was over come by almost a hundred emotions which he could make no sense of at all. He opened his mouth attempting to piece together something intelligible or even slightly charming to say but was too overwhelmed and lowered his gaze.
Juli took advantage of the situation and continued.
"Please, don't do this to me. Just understand and let it be. Just leave and forget about it. It's what's best, we both know it."
At this his head shot up defiantly. "Just forget about it", he said raising his voice, and causing Juli to turn around and make sure her crew was still at work. Those who had stopped to watch, quickly averted their attention under her gaze.
"Just forget about it", he repeated quieter. "I might 'ave been able to do that if ye 'and't just said that first part, the part about bein in love with me."
"I did not say I was in love with you", she snapped back. "I said I was fallin for ye. There's a difference. Falling can be stopped before any harm's done, and that's my plan. Savvy?"
Hurt, shocked, and confused, Jack put his hands together, gave Julianne a little bow, turned on his heel and headed back for the Pearl.
The crew of the Renegade stood bewildered as they watched at the receding ship sail away without so much as an idea of why it had come at all. Still standing at the helm, Captain J. Amaris gripped the wheel as she stared off at the Pearl, and felt her heart breaking.
~~~
When Jack finished recounting his tale, no one spoke. Will and Elizabeth looked at each other while Julianne concentrated intently on the little bit of rum that she swirled around in her bottle. Taking in everyone's uncomfortable reaction, Jack rose and walked over to the desk where he sat on its edge. Reaching inside his jacket, he fished around for a moment before pulling his hand out. Looking up, Julianne noticed that he clutched a small, tattered piece of paper. Taking it from him gingerly, her eyes grew wide when she realized what it was.
"Jack", she exclaimed in barely a whisper, looking up at him.
Exchanging a knowing glance, Will and Elizabeth took this as their cue to leave. Getting up, they quietly made their way to the door.
"Where're ye goin", Julianne asked, tearing her attention from Jack.
Elizabeth opened her mouth to answer, but Will cut her off before she said anything too misgiving.
"We're going to call it a night. It's getting pretty late. Though we hope to continue this conversation tomorrow if you'd be so obliged."
"Aye, we'd be."
"Goodnight then."
"Goodnight kiddies", Jack called as they shut the door behind them.
Julianne now turned her attention back to Jack. "Why did you keep this?"
"Considered it me motivation."
"Motivation for what?"
"Motivation to keep it from comin true."
At this, a change came over Julianne. For a rare moment, the harsh and commanding look of her weather touched and tanned face melted away, revealing a softer, young woman. It was the Julianne Jack had known all those years ago before the hardships of being a pirate had made her callous and stern. She stood up from her seat, paper still in hand, and came to stand in front of where Jack still sat on her desk. Looking straight into his eyes, she bit her lip unconsciously, trying to decide what to say. Words failed her, and she felt tears beginning to form in the corner of her eyes.
Whether it was to hide her tears or for lack of the right thing to say, Julianne gave up on explanations and threw her arms around Jack in a tight hug.
"I'm so sorry Jack", she began after a minute.
"Sorry for what luv", he asked into her hair.
"I've been so horrible. I've never once let you forget the shitty things you've done, and I 'aven't been any better. I left you like that so many times, and you came after me every single one of them. How could you even put up with me?"
"Stop being ridiculous", Jack answered softly. "You act like I've done no wrong. It's been equal between us, with everything. I come after you when you leave, and you take me back when I mess up royally."
Pulling back, she looked at him unconvinced.
"Besides", he added with a grin. "Ye usually only leave me when I've done something to deserve it anyway."
His comment achieved its goal when she smiled. "Now enough of this", he continued, wiping underneath both of her eyes. "As much as I'd like to cherish the moment because it's such a rare thing, I can't say I'm entirely used to this whole sentimental side of ye. Buck up Cap'n", he barked taking her firmly by both shoulders.
Julianne sighed with a small smile and punched him lightly in the stomach.
"Oh, you'll pay for that", Jack threatened. Pulling her to him roughly, he looked at her with a grin for just a moment before his lips touched hers.
"It's not a punishment if the person enjoys it Jack", she laughed at him afterwards.
"Call it what you will", he replied jumping up. Taking the piece of paper back from her, he carefully folded it back up and put it in the pocket from whence it came. Turning back to Julianne, he smiled mischievously. Julianne raised her eyebrows in suspicion, but they grew wide when Jack unexpectedly swung his arms around her and picked her up.
"Jack", she exclaimed with a laugh.
"Ye want to see punishment", he asked lightly. "I'm all for showing ye luv", he finished as he walked from the front of the cabin to Juli's bedroom and dropped her lightly on the bed.