11/6/03: The final chapter sniffle  Finished exactly three weeks after I began.

17. A New Beginning

"Harry?  Harry?  C'mon man, wake up!"

Harry opened his eyes, his vision slowly coming into focus.  He blinked rapidly as full consciousness took force.  He realized he was lying down, surrounded by a sea of anxious faces.  Gryffindor faces.

"Are you alright Harry?" Ron asked, helping him to a seated position.  Harry put his hand to his temples, rubbing gently.

"Yeah, I think so.  What happened?"

"We were just talking, celebrating our win over Slytherin, when you just collapsed.  No warning, you just fell down and collapsed," he heard Ginny say, the worry evident in her voice.

"I'm fine," Harry said wearily.  So, it worked, he was back.  Harry sighed heavily, a moment of grief for the life he left behind.  All of sudden, his face shot up.  "Hermione!  Where's Hermione?" 

Ron looked around.  "I'm not sure…I think she mentioned something about studying in the library before the celebration starts."

"So…she's alright then?  I mean, she's not hurt or anything?"

Ron gave him a quizzical look.  "Of course she's fine.  Why?"

Harry breathed a sigh of relief.  That worked as well.  "Nothing.  I just need to see her."  And he did need to see her.  Now.  Harry was afraid if he waited, he would lose his nerve.  He had to act while the Slytherin part of him was still fresh.  "I need to see her," he repeated, getting to his feet.  Ron looked at him worriedly.

"Alright mate, I'll give you hand," he said, sharing a worried look with the other Gryffindors.  "C'mon."  Ron helped Harry stagger through the portrait hole and down the hall until Harry regained full use of his legs.  They walked in silence for a bit, Ron obviously worried about his best friend's behavior.

"Ron?" Harry asked. "Has anything…odd happened lately?"

Ron's eyebrows furrowed.  "Odd?  What do you mean?"

Harry shrugged.  He was facing that familiar feeling of having two memories, but this time it was the memory of the past three months as a Gryffindor that was missing.  "My memories just a bit fuzzy," he said.  Upon seeing the alarmed look on Ron's face, Harry quickly added, "It's nothing to worry about; it'll come back.  I just want to know if anything…strange has been going on.  With You-Know-Who, or between us, you, me, and Hermione."

Ron shook his head.  "Nothing odd, Harry.  You-Know-Who's been quiet, what with everyone on the lookout for him.  Hermione's actually been nicer about studying this year, without OWLs to bug us about, which I suppose could be considered as odd.  But that's it."

Harry nodded with a sigh of relief.  He had been afraid that bad things might have happened in the two months he'd been "gone."  Soon after, they reached the library and Harry spotted Hermione within, partially hidden by a stack of books.  Ron made to go in, but Harry stopped him.

"There's something you should know, Ron."  Harry took a deep breath, dreading this conversation.  He'd suspected that Ron might have feelings for Hermione, and he wasn't sure how Ron would react, whether with anger, jealousy, resignation, or all of the above.

"What's that, Harry?"

"I've been doing some…thinking ever since we got back to school.  I…I think I love Hermione."

"Well, sure Harry, we all love Hermione-"

"No Ron, I don't just love Hermione, I'm in love with her, as in 'til death do us part,' love"

Though Ron looked confused by the 'death do us part' statement (clearly not part of a wizarding marriage ceremony), he clearly understood the first part.  He gulped.  "You…love Hermione, like you want to date her?"

Harry chuckled.  "Yes, date and more.  I think I want to spend the rest of my life with her."

"Oh," Ron said and was silent for a minute.  Harry gave Ron the time to let his brain process the startling news.  "And, how does she feel about you?"

Harry shrugged.  "That, I don't know.  I'm planning on telling her now."

"Oh," Ron repeated. 

"Listen Ron, I know that you like her too-"

That seemed to break Ron from his stupor.  "Hang on a minute.  You know what?"

Harry grew uncomfortable, hoping that he wouldn't have to spell out this part.  "I know that you like her too, that you want to date her-"

"Back up a minute there, Potter.  What on earth gave you that idea?" Ron asked, confusion all over his face.

"Well, you were awfully jealous when she went with Krum to the Yule Ball…"

Ron's face cleared, and he raised his eyebrows as he remembered.  Then, surprising Harry, he laughed.

"What?" Harry asked.

"I don't like Hermione in that way, Harry," he said between chuckles.

"What?  Then why were you acting so jealous?"

Ron sobered.  "It wasn't that I liked her…" He looked distinctly uncomfortable.

"What was it, then?"

"I…I guess I was afraid of losing her.  I mean, the two of us, we'll always be best mates.  No woman could split us up.   But Hermione's different.  She could find a guy who will take her away from us.  With the two of us, we'll always have Quidditch and guy things to do; but Hermione's a girl….it's not the same.  I was just afraid she would like Viktor better and then leave us."

"So…you don't like her?"  Harry had to be sure.

Ron laughed.  "No Harry, I don't like her.  I mean I like her, she's our best friend, but I don't like her like you like her.  Actually, I'm happy that you do like her.  If you two get together, then we'll never be rid of her."

"You aren't worried that we'll…you know…exclude you?"

Ron shrugged.  "I've always known that someday you'll find a girl and exclude me in some way.  I mean, I do have five older brothers, you know.  It'll be an adjustment, especially having to watch the two of you snog, but I can handle it."

Harry smiled.  "Thanks Ron."

"Good luck mate," he said, clapping him on the back.  "But keep in mind that if you hurt her feelings, I'm going to have to kick your arse."   Ron laughed then walked away, leaving Harry to his fate.

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For a long moment, Harry considered running away.  He could always retreat and regroup, circling with Ron to figure out a way to brooch the subject, see if they could figure out what Hermione was feeling instead of Harry just blurting his own feelings out.  But then, Harry's Slytherin side piped up, reminding him of time they spent over the past three months in his other version of reality.  It's now or never.  Harry squared his shoulders and marched up to her.

"Hi Hermione," Harry squeaked.   He cleared his throat, knowing that things weren't starting off well.

Hermione looked up. "Oh!  Hi Harry," she said, with a glint of amusement in her eyes.  She caught his squeak, unfortunately.

Harry looked around, noticing the emptiness of the library.  Good, less people to witness his possible humiliation.  "Mind if I sit?"

"Of course," Hermione said, smiling as she moved a stack of books aside.  Oh, how Harry loved that smile, those teeth, those lips…the way her eyes danced-

"Harry?  Were you going to sit?"

"Er, yeah," Harry said, feeling foolish at being caught staring.  "Anyways.  Hermione."

"Yes?"

"So…how are you?" he asked, clearly chickening out at the last moment.

Hermione chuckled at Harry's obvious discomfort.  Little did she suspect that the reason was her.  "I'm fine Harry.  Nice catch earlier, by the way."

Catch?  Ah yes, the Quidditch match.  "Thanks.  So, anyways, I was hoping to talk to you…"

Hermione gave him a wry smile.  "Isn't that what we're doing?"

"Well, yeah, but…I mean talk about something important."

"Sure Harry, anything.  What is it?"

"Well…" Harry said, at a loss of where to start.  'Try at the beginning,' suggested Hermione's voice in his head.  Harry grinned.  "Something happened to me-"

"Oh no!  What is it?  Voldemort?"

Harry took her hands in his own, trying to calm her down.  "No, nothing like that, I've just-" Harry looked down at her hands and stopped talking.  He was suddenly reminded of the last time he had held her hand, covered with blood.

"What is it Harry?" Hermione asked, concern evident on her face.

"I…" Harry started, but he found he couldn't continue.  Hermione had been killed because of him, because of their relationship.  Voldemort kidnapped her specifically because they were together.  Harry suddenly realized that he couldn't tell her how he felt – it would place her in too much danger.  As long as Voldemort was alive, he would have to keep his feelings to himself, even if it meant that Hermione found someone else in the meantime. 

"Harry?"

Harry forced a smile.  "It's nothing Hermione.  Just something I need to tell you and Ron about later."

"Oh…okay.  Is that all?  It seemed like there was something else…?"

Harry shook his head, standing.  "That's all.  Oh, and I wanted to make sure you're coming to the party later."

Hermione smiled at him.  "Of course Harry.  I'll see you there."

"Okay, see you later, Hermione."  Harry waved and then left the library.  As he walked away, Harry found that he was filled with a sense of resolve – if it took defeating Voldemort for him and Hermione to be together, well, then that's just what he'd have to do.

A/N: And so ends my second story ever.  Yay, thanks to everyone for reading!  Kinda threw you for a loop at the end, with Harry changing his mind?  Not a very satisfying way to end it, right?  Well, just as an innocent observation, I'm sure by now everyone knows that at the end of Matrix: Reloaded, after the credits, there was a preview for Revolutions.  I think that maybe you should read through my thanks sections and see if there's anything interesting at the end.

So, thanks to everyone who reviewed so far!  I had a lot of fun writing the story and reading all the reviews, and even more fun responding to them!  I'm not sure I would do anything different if I had the chance.  Maybe write some more scenes about Harry and Hermione dating early on and the Slytherin's reactions, but I had an urge to get to the action. 

To all future reviewers, check out the newest chapter of my latest story and I'll probably have a few words of response for you there.

I hate to thank only certain reviewers, since it might make it sound like I didn't appreciate everyone's reviews.  But some deserve special mention for reviewing many, many, many times:

My star reviewers are still ears91 and onkel.  You two kept it up from my first story, and I really appreciate it!  Starre was right up there too, but I'm afraid I lost her when I went evil!Draco :(

There are a bunch of prolific reviewers from my first story who followed me to this one that I want to thank: Romm, Maxx77, keebler-elmo, and Facade1 - though you too disappeared on me :(  Why Facade why?? throws self off cliff wailing

New reviewers to this story I want to thank are: A.M.bookworm247, naughty little munchkin, Narcissa-Malfoy-22, liseli vanida-kateb, Calen, zaraky, and ennui2.

If anyone is interested in a few H/Hr fluffy one-shots, I have four over in the H/Hr - Challenges forum at Portkey under Trick or Treat, 3 Minutes in a Closet, Stuck Where?, and 'Mione Stop Studying.  They're usually at the end, though Trick or Treat is in three posts.

ennui2: Harry does remember everything from his Slytherin reality, which does not encourage a "happily ever after" type ending (hint: scroll down past the responses).

Jeff b: Nothing really happened to all the other kids.  Only Harry remembers and knows about the other reality, for everyone else it's as if three months have passed as normal.

A.M.bookworm247: you make me blush; I don't think my head can fit through the door of my office anymore!

Squirrelface RAE: Hi! Almost didn't see you sneak in; thanks for giving this story a chance.

ears91: Because I don't like to leave people in suspense if I can avoid it, I'll tell you now that absolutely nothing of importance occurred during the three months that Harry "missed" in Gryffindor.

Honey Bee 80: Hi Honey Bee.  Your reviews are like bookends: one at the beginning and one at the end :)

naughty little munchkin: more exams?  STOP THE MADNESS!!  Good luck :)

Preview

Here's a preview of the sequel Harry Potter and the Decisions of Fate: Consequences of Choice (working title).  Keep in mind like all movie previews, the scenes may not be in order and some parts may be cut out.

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"I still can't believe you liked being a Slytherin!" Ron said, looking highly affronted.

"It wasn't that bad, Ron.  I mean, they're not so bad once you get to know them.  It's really Malfoy's fault that they're all so horrid."

"Still…they're Slytherins!"

"Well, I think Harry's right," Hermione said, sounding very businesslike.  "Not all Slytherins are destined to become dark wizards, Ron."

"Well, most are," Ron grumbled under his breath.

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"Daphne!  Daphne, wait!" Harry cried, running across the grounds to catch up with the Slytherin.

"Leave me alone Potter!" she said acidly.

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Harry rushed to her side.  This couldn't be happening, not again.  But it was: Hermione lay on her side, the blood slowly pooling from her body.  Harry reached her the same time as Ginny, and he quickly turned her over, fearing what he would see.

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"That's it," Harry roared, finally succumbing to the anger as he leapt to his feet.  "I've suffered through five years of your taunts and abuse, and I've had enough!"  An icy chill seemed to fill the room, and Snape looked upon Harry with wide, frightful eyes.

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But as Harry walked away, he couldn't help but feel like a liar, and a bitter one at that.  He had given up everything by breaking the gemstone to be with Hermione.  And here he was a Gryffindor again and miserable, and worst of all, he had lost the very reason for returning.

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Each day seemed to be harder than the one before it.  He spent every minute with her; attending classes together, studying together, eating together.  Each minute being with her and not being able to hold her, to touch her, to kiss her, was a slow torture.

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Something snapped deep within Harry.  He fixed Malfoy with a cold glare, waving his wand.  A dark mist seemed to surround the three Slytherins, gradually obscuring them from view.  He could hear their panicked voices crying out, he could see the fear growing on their faces as the mist enveloped them, and Harry felt glad.  Soon the mist overtook the even the large forms of Crabbe and Goyle, and only their cries of terror could be heard.

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"Harry," she cried, her voice fighting to be heard above the whipping winds.  "Please don't do this, it's not you, it's not who you are!"

But Harry just looked at her, his eyes cold and dead.  It was just too much, too much pain, too much anger.  He raised his wand again and muttered an incantation.

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Look for Harry Potter and the Decisions of Fate: Consequences of Choice to hit a website near you sometime in December or January '04.  The cast is currently on location on another story, the first chapter of which should be posted tomorrow.