Author's note: This is my first Hey Arnold Fan Fic. I haven't been watching Arnold very long but after I saw "Helga On the Couch" I immediately fell in love with the show, and especially the Character Helga. I was also inspired to write this crappy Fan fiction, and fan art. Hopefully when I get time I'll color the pictures and update soon Fanfiction.net doesn't allow Hyperlinks in stories so please follow the link Under Homepage on my Profile if you'd like to view the Illustrations for this Fic.
Helga glanced at the gathering storm clouds, as she and Phoebe made their way into school. It was just her luck that Miriam would toss out her one and only Raincoat while cleaning the attic. How could her own mother throw away her only Raincoat like it was so much garbage? Of course she knew how, because she wasn't Olga. Olga's room, and all of her old clothes where kept clean and safe like some frigging museum. While her stuff gets tossed aside and forgotten much like her self.
"No coat today Helga?" Oh the voice, that beautiful melodic voice. Helga turned to regard her secret love since pre-school, Arnold. Like every one else but her, he and Gerald wore their heavy coats just incase it started raining before they got home.
Helga's Skin tingled and her heart raced as it always did when she saw her oblong-headed bow. "What's it too you football head?" Helga said in a hostile tone, then she cursed herself for not being able to express o him how she really felt.
"Well it'll probably rain today. I'll share my Umbrella with you on the way home if ya' like. We are going the same way after all." Arnold said with his usual good nature ness.
Oh, what valor, what consideration for his fellow human being, it was no wonder she worshiped and loved him so. But being true to her nature of, denial in the face of affection Helga responded. "Criminy! What am I some charity case? Get this through your football shaped skull I'd rather get rained on and catch Pneumonia then be seem with a weird headed dweeb like you!" then pushing past Arnold forcefully Helga stomped her way into the building.
"Man! She really hates you Arnold" Gerald remarked. "I told you, you should just give up talking to her."
"Yeah I know, I just don't get why she's mad at me all the time." Looking up at the clock on the wall he continued. "Maybe one day I'll figure it out, but lets get to class before we're late."
The two boys rushed through the halls, unaware of the pink clad figure watching from the janitor's closet. Plucking the heart shaped lock from her neckline, from it resting place next to her heart and between where her bosom would some day be Helga mused, "Oh my sweet Arnold! Why can't I show you my true self? Why must I forever persecute you in order to hide my love, my honey haired Adonis." Then hearing the heavy asthmatic breathing of Brainy invading her space and privacy. Helga punched him in the face like normal
Helga made her way though the school day much like every other, Board out of her mind. Her Sixth grade year had been the worst of her elementary school experience. The classes where too easy, the teachers walking jokes and her fellow students, giggling clothed sheep following any trend or fad that came down the turn pike. She didn't give two damns about anything thing in this place beside her one and only friend Phoebe, and of course *shivers and tingles* Arnold. The final bell rang signaling her release from the hell that was elementary school. This would be her last year at PS. 182. Of course middle school wouldn't be any better just a totally different type of hell.
"Helga just a moment of your time please," Her teacher Mr. Simmons said before she could successfully make her escape.
Sigh, "What is it?" Helga huffed. Her teacher was a nice guy, and a bit wimpy but an ok Joe.
"I have a surprise and the most wonderful news for you." A deep foreboding feeling filled her. Whenever teachers had "Wonderful news" it was trouble.
"Ok spill it Teach," she said looking bored.
"Well your last creative writing assingment was so wonderful…. so compelling
. It stirs so much emotion in the reader.."
Ugh Her teacher did tend to go on, when it came to her writing. It was embarrassing, but a little flattering that some one noticed her for anything. "Oh come on! Spit it out all ready!"
"Well,.well Helga like I said I thought it was so good I sent it to a friend of mine. She publishes a creative writing journal," He said nervously.
"YOU WHAT?!" Helga yelled, "You had no right! We agreed that what I write would be kelp anonymous! Now I have total stranger looking at my stupid writing?"
"Yes, I did and perhaps I over stepped myself a bit" he laughed nervously, it was hard to stay mad at such a timid guy." But she absolutely loved it! And was shocked that such prose could come from an 11 year old girl. She's going to publish it in this months issue.".
'Oh hell!' Helga thought
"Of course per our agreement it would be publish under Anonymous"
"Well I guess that won't be so bad"
"But that not the best part!" Her Teacher gushed. "She knows some very important people in the writing community, that Run the "Future writers of America scholarship", It kind of like a year long writing camp where young writers travel together and learn together and develop there creative voice. Normally this scholarship is open only to high school aged students but she wants to make a exception in your case!"
To say the lest, Helga was floored. Her writing was just her way of dealing with the torture that was she home and school life, And of course to pay tribute to her own flaxen haired love god Arnold. "Come again? You mean somebody want to send me on a trip because of the crap that I write?"
"Indeed Helga but we must act now. A last minute slot opened up and we need you parents permission by tomorrow and have you packed and on a plane by tomorrow evening!" He then reached into his desk and pulled out a small stack of paper. "She faxed me the paper work this morning" Then taking on that extra surgery sweet tone of his. "I know you don't like sharing your gift, but please think of this as a once and a life time opportunity for grow and exploration of your inner self Helga." God this guy was overly dramatic.
"Err… I'll talk to my folks and let you know." Helga looked down at the permission papers apprehensively.
Helga finally made he way out of the building reading the details of the scholarship. Free room and board, travel to exotic places, round table discussions of great works of literature. "It dose seem like and a life time chance to travel on someone else's dime." She said sarcastically. "But a whole year away? How can I leave the only place I've ever called home, my family, my Arnold? Ok My family wouldn't be so hard to leave but Arnold would be." She mused. Between her mothers 30 proof smoothes and Big Bob mind always on his Beeper and cell business. Helga had grown accustomed to running her own life. If she hadn't become so independent as a young age, she may have starved to death by now. But this decision was just too big, too life changing to make on her own. Helga looked up at the dark clouds, the rain seemed to be holding back long enough to make her way home. Maybe her luck was changing. Then a proud smile came across her face. "Yeah maybe this scholarship is a good thing. Maybe for once my parents will sit up and take notice of me ." Helga said triumphantly, "My oh so perfect sister never won a writing scholarship at 12. Maybe for once Big Bob and Miriam will see me for who I am and wont compare me to….."
"Baby sister!" the older beautiful blonde girl cried as she hugged her.
"Olga…" Helga finished dryly.
Helga looked on at her Mom and Dad gushed and smiled like hyenas on laughing gas. Olga buzzed about the room perfectly, telling them about her perfect grades and Perfect overseas school and her perfect plan to surprise them all with a perfect visit. "Perfect…" Helga grumbled.
"Oh Mummy and Daddy I missed you so much!" Olga cooed hugging them for the 57th time."
Well no one, not even Olga was going to steal Her thunder today. Helga fished scholarship papers out of her pocket ready to drop her great news on her parents. "Mom , Dad I have news!
"Oh Olga you need to come visit us more often!" He mom said a lot more sober then normal. She didn't seem to drink her "Smoothies" as much when Olga visited.
"Like I was saying, something great happened today.." Helga continued only to be cut off again.
'Yeah Olga" her Dad said not seeming to hear Helga, 'Not that he ever did when his first born was about' Helga thought. "And I sure do miss all of those fancy dishes you always cook when your here as a matter of fact don't I smell something great now?"
Helga counted to ten backwards trying to calm her self, for once she wish that they would listen to her. She had Life changing news. "Listen to me. My teacher liked one of my short stories and……"
"Mhhmmh.. That nice dear" her mother patted her on the head like she was pacifying a child, "Yeah what is that? It smells wonderful Olga."
"Ggrrrrrrrr" Helga snarled and clenched her fist
"Well it a little something I learn form a master chief at the Cordon blue' in Paris'" She smiled sweetly revealing the perfectly made dish of sweet looking pastries.
"Dad listen to me…" Helga half pleaded. "Please, just this once…"
Unfortunately Bob and Miriam were eating their cream filled puffs with gusto. saying, "Oh Olga! This it wonderful , this is great this is just.. just."
"Perfect…." Helga said her voice mixing with both sadness and anger, not that anyone noticed.
"PERFECT!" they both agreed at the same time as bits of fluff and cream covered Big Bob's mouth.
Helga had finally had enough, 'I will get noticed this time.' She thought angrily, 'Just this once my accomplishments will be seen! I will not get over looked for Olga and her cream filled pieces of shit!' she cursed in her head. Helga stomped up to her father and yanked hard on his shirt. Big Bob's pudgy, cream smeared face looked down at her. "Here!" she said though clinched teeth. Helga fist thrust the papers into his face. The Permission slips and the sheets detailing the scholarship details and why Helga at such a young age would be giving this once in a life time chance. Helga held in her hand definitive proof that she did matter and she did exist. Those papers symbolized her emergence out of her Perfect sisters shadow.
Big Bob looked that the papers and said "Wow!" then preceded to use them to wipe his the cream off his mouth. "Thanks honey I needed some napkins. You're becoming more and more considerate. Just like Olga!" then handed the cream smeared papers back to Helga.
It would be very poetic to say something deep in side Helga's heart broke. But that would be a lie and Helga was many things, but a liar wasn't one of them. No, what was once in side her heart was fractured along time ago, but she could never fully accept it till just this moment. The young girl looked at the soiled papers and the cream smudges on the acknowledgment of her abilities. Helga watched the lovely heartwarming scene for a minute. Loving parents, happy to see their loving, considerate perfect daughter as she hugged them for the 58th time. And she suddenly understood why this was such a wonderfully perfect picture, because she wasn't in it. Helga backed away. It was so simple she totally missed it for the first eleven years of her life. As she watched Olga hand feed her father a sweet pastry she finally understood why she felt so out of place, because she didn't belong. "Nether necessary, needed, or wanted." She said with a sad chuckle while tossing the small stack of papers on the desk she headed towards the door. "I'm going out." She said softly. The volume at which she said it wouldn't matter, they wouldn't hear her regardless. She understood it clearly now but they were her parent and it was protocol to announce your leaving the room whether or not they cared. Helga opened the door and the chill night air slid across her thin frame. With no coat to grab she walked out into the chill night as a fat raindrop hit her nose. An emotionless soulless smile crossed her lips, a smile not of amusement, but of acceptance of the inevitable. "Of course." She said at the dark rain clouds choice this precise moment to let loose their deluge. The rain soaked her, but that was one thing good about it as she disappeared into the night. If the rain could hit her, she wasn't totally nonexistent, regardless of what her parents might think Helga doesn't remember picking any particular direction or having any ideal where she was going, but as the rain and her own tears became indistinguishable from each other, she knew she didn't belong at home, she really didn't belong anywhere.
Arnold picked up the cordless phone so he could continue his conversation with Gerald, while he went to the kitchen for a snack. As he made him a sandwich he glanced out of the small window over the sink. Sheets of rain battered the window and the wind moaned its strong presence across the window seal. "Wow its totally pouring outside. I haven't seen it rain this hard in a long time. Anyway did you see Lila today? God could she be any cuter?" Arnold continued on his favorite topic.
"Oh man! You don't know when to quit do you Arnold?" Gerald laughed over the other end of the receiver. "Remember she," Then using his best Lila accent and voice. "Ever so certain that she only like you, not like, like you."
"Ha, ha, very funny." Arnold said very un-amused." Before Arnold could explain his ten-part one-year plain to get Lila to "Like, like him" he heard something. "Hold on Gerald," Arnold stood in the kitchen quietly hoping to hear it again, and he did. It was a very soft almost faint knocking at the front door. Look at his watch and the display reading 10:00 pm He wondered who it could be at this time of night? Cracking the door only a bit to see a dark figure about his height standing there, Arnold opened to door fully and stood in shock.
Illustration 1Helga Pitaki stood in his darkened doorway. Her black solute was brightened only for a moment by a flash of lighting, but he could see her pink dress was soaks and clinging to her thin frame. Her normally bouncy pigtails hung heavy and limp with rainwater. Straggles of blonde hair were plastered to her face and neck. He arms where folded tightly in a vain attempt to keep warm in the torrential rain and wind, but the most Disturbing about Helga was not her wet shivering form but her eyes. Arnold has known Helga, for a long time, and her eyes where always fierce, angry, and indomitable. These eyes where not the eyes of the Helga G. Pitaki he's grew to fear and respect. Besides looking wet and cold Helga seemed somehow lost, lost and alone.
"H…Helga?" was all Arnold could ask.
Helga expression nether did not change nor did she speak Arnold noticed again how totally lost she looked.
Bringing the receiver back to his ear Arnold said "Gerald I'll call you back."
Illustration: 2Arnold walked back into his room carrying the hot cup of Coco his Grandma made. Helga was wearing a very large old t-shirt's of Arnold's as her wet clothes dried. Arnold handed the warm cup to the still silent Helga. She did manage a small weak smile in Arnold's general direction but she still said nothing as to why she was here or why she seemed so sad. He's first impulse was try and get Helga to talk. But his Grandpa in his 'round about' way told him not to push her. Helga never was very nice to Arnold, but deep down, he knew she was a nice person and he counted her as one of his friends. Seeing Helga like this, none of her spirit and so lost looking, and hurt touched Arnold deeper then thought it would. After taking a few sips of the hot coco she set it aside and folded her hand in her lamp. Arnold got the impression she wanted to say something but something was holding her back. Arnold sat down on his bed next to Helga. For sevral long moments they sat in silence. Helga turned her head and her eyes tugging upward on their on looking into Arnolds own eyes.
Illustration: 3The next few minutes would become a blur in her memory. She clearly remembers feeling sorry for her self. Then she was looking into Arnold beautiful caring eyes, and the next moment her face was buried in his shirt bawling her eyes out. She'd never ever wanted to look weak, and never in front of her beloved Arnold. She wanted so much to stop, to feel that fierce fire she had always had, but years of repressed sadness and anger bubbled its way to the surface, liquefied and manifested as tears. Helga had never felt so weak so vulnerable, but never once did Arnold mock her or make fun of her. She only remember him taking her hand his and holding it genially. Helga cried on Arnold's shoulder for what seemed like an eternity. After while Helga regain both her composure and a bit of her attitude. "God that was embarrassing." she admitted blushing.
"I don't think you have anything to be ashamed of Helga. We all get sad every now and again." Arnold wanted very much to help her but he was glad Helga wasn't crying any more. Like any male he didn't know what to do with a crying female. "Do you want to talk about it?" He asked after a while
"Err… Talk about what." Helga said still somewhat embarrassed
"I mean the reason your was crying, the reason you was trying to freeze to death in the rain without a coat and why you came here of all place. I mean it's no secret that I'm not your favorite person in the world.
Helga wanted to profess to him how she loved him. But not wanting to make yet another ass of her self she told a half true. "To be honest Arnold I don't even remember walking in this direction. I guess I had a little emotional breakdown or something and the next thing I know I'm standing in your door."
"But why are you so sad? Your parents must be worried sick about you!" He asked. "They're probably calling the police right now."
"HA what a joke! With Olga back in town I 'm like, invisible to them.'
Arnold shook his head. "I find that hard to believe. Helga"
Helga merely grinned at him." Of course you can't understand Football head. Your too nice a guy and have family that cares about your general well being." Helga said with a hint of envy in her voice. And suddenly realized she was very jealous of Arnold's loving home family. Once again her eyes where over flowing with hear tears. Arnold seemed to produce a napkin from nowhere and begin to mop her wet face. "God! I can't believe I keep braking down in fount of you like this. You would think I would be use to big Bob and Miriam's neglect by now. "
Arnold could almost see the hurtful memories play across her face. "Well we should call them. So they can pick you up. It still raining out, and I'm not about to let you walk out into that storm again."
"Look Arnold I can't go home right now. I just can't deal with that place. I'll call big Bob and explain things and I'll stay here for the night." Then suddenly her face felt really flush, "I mean if that ok with you that is. I'll understand if you wouldn't want me here. I mean, I know you don't like me."
"No that fine Helga you clear it with your folks and I'll get some blankets for the fold out down stairs." Arnold said giving her hand a warm squeeze. Then he said, "And I don't hate you Helga, never did. You my friend and I like you."
Helga didn't think it was possible but she fell even deeper in love with him that moment. But she tried not to let it show too much. "Your sweet Arnold. Don't ever change."
Arnold explained as best he could to his Grand parents as he left the room to let a Helga call her mom and dad. Of course Helga wouldn't really call them, she just couldn't emotional take talking to her parents. Besides Helga also know she wouldn't be missed. And was positive that her Mom and Dad didn't even realize she was gone.
True to his word Arnold set up a nice comfortable make shift bed and wished Helga sweet dreams. Not that any came but the very ideal that she slept under the same roof, as her beloved was enough to set her soul ablaze. As comfortable as she was sleep never came to her. All she could think about was hw screwed up her life was. The best thing she had in her life was the odd shaped headed boy sleeping peacefully up stairs, blissfully unaware of the passion she felt for him. Maybe loving Arnold for afar was enough to get her through the day once, but now she just felt empty. Helga knew she had to find other things to love and other thing to inspire her other then Arnold, or she would wither up and die inside. That scene tonight with her Mom and Dad finial convinced her of this fact. Helga listened to the rain letting the soothing sound comfort her wounded spirit. She knew what she had to do. She had to get away from everything, even her beloved Arnold in order to find her self. Maybe then she'll be ready to not only feel, but to act on that burning passion in her breast. "One year away from everything, and everybody, traveling and discovering my inner voice….. Not a bad deal." But there was one thing she had to do first.
Arnold was very worried for Helga, but things tended to look better in the morning and after while he did drift off to sleep. Sometime during the night Arnold felt a presence near. Not fully asleep but not totally awake, his eyes opened only slightly. Sitting on his bed haloed but soft moonlight was Helga, or he was dreaming about Helga he wasn't really sure.
"Arnold I don't know if your awake but I want to tell you something. I'm sorry for every rotten thing I ever did to you. I'm glad I have you as my friend and maybe when I get back I can tell you how I really feel about you, but till then, please take this, and keep it in that place, between asleep and awake."
The shadowy feminine figure placed the soft hand on his shoulder and then he felt the most wonderfully soft, feeling on his lips. He could even smell the intoxicating aroma of her hair. Drifting deeper into unconsciousness 'What a great dream' he remember thinking.
Then as his dream came to a close, almost in whisper he heard. "I love you football head."
Illustration: 4Arnold woke in the morning and rubbed the sleep out of his eyes. "Man I can't believe I had a dream about Helga." It was a bit confusing seeing as how Lila was the star of most of his dream as of late. His touched his lips. That kiss felt so real. "Was it a dream?" he asked him self. An ominous feeling that something was wrong swept him. Jumping out of bed Arnold rushed down stairs to check on Helga. The pullout bed he left her on was folded back into a couch as if no one was ever there. Then a small glimmer of gold caught his eye. It was a locket. With a quick look he saw Helga's name on it and upon opening it he found his picture inside with the words "My love" inscribed. Arnold raced into the Kitchen, where his Grandmother was making breakfast and his Grandfather was replacing alight bulb. "Where's Helga?" Arnold asked in a near panic.
"Who your little friend with the eye brow? Oh she left early this morning, she said she had something to do at home."
Arnold didn't like the way this was all shaping up. Changing into his school clothes quickly He ran non-stop to Helga's house with all manner of horrible things running though his mind. In the emotional state she was in the night before Arnold began to think the worst. He tried to remind him self that Helga was a smart, strong girl and she wouldn't do anything stupid. Finally making it to The Pitaki's front door, He began to bang it hard hoping to get an answer.
Helga's mom answered the door looking like she already had one of her morning 'Smoothies' "Oh your Helga's little friend Ernie or something.
"Yes that Arnold ma'am. I just wanted to make sure Helga's all right."
Miriam looked a little confused or drunken Arnold couldn't tell. "Of course she is I think she's up stair. She stayed in her room all night. She dose that, sometimes. You know how moody she can get," she said with a grin
"What do you mean? Helga showed up at my door last night crying her eyes out and she slept there" Arnold was horrified Helga's parents really didn't notice she had left.
"What? Helga left the house?" She said seeming to sober up a bit.
Arnold was out of his mind with worry now. Pushing past Misses Pitaki Arnold ran up the Helga's bedroom.
"Hey who's that kid running through my house?" Big Bob could be heard yelling.
Arnold didn't pay him any mind; he's only thoughts were for Helga. Finding her room Arnold made his way in only to find Helga gone and possibly a few of her things. But a single sheet of page on her bed caught his eye.
"What's the meaning of this? " Mr. Pataki yelled finding a strange boy in his daughter room reading something.
Arnold looked sadly at the Note and handed it to Mr. Pataki "Here this is for you." Arnold said with just a hint of disgust in his voice.
Mr. Pataki read the note:
Dear Bob and Miriam Don't worry about me, not that you ever do.
I'm going on a trip, and No you don't have to pay for it. Please see My Teacher Mr. Simmons for the details. I don't Ask much of you two, and I've gotten even less but PLEASE, If my feelings ever meant anything to you, nether send for me or come get me. I'm in a Safe supervised environment and hopefully I'll be a better and saner person when I get back.
Love~ Helga G. Pataki
Arnold made his way past the large stunned man. "After you read it, ask your self this. How long would it have been till you realized Helga was gone if I hadn't shown up here?" Arnold made his way out of the building and towards school. "Please be safe Helga" he prayed. Then he touched his lips wondering if that was a dream or a wonderful good bye. Arnold zipped his coat up as small drops of rain made their marks on the hard concrete. "It's going to be another rainy day" he say wistfully
Forging Big Bobs and Miriam's signature on the permission slips and release forms was easy enough; Helga's been doing it for years. At those times when her mother made her smoothies too strong and forgot to pay the bills, Helga had plenty of practice sighing their names on checks and things. The hardest part was that first step onto the plane knowing she was leaving everything she was familiar with behind. Helga sunk into her set looking lazily out the plane window at the fluffy and wind streaked topside of clouds feeling sick. She was nether Home sick or even Air sick, but good old fashion Lovesick. Her finger touched the spot she once to keep her locket but even that was gone as the plane carried her swiftly away. If you asked the Pilot where there was coming from and where they were going, Helga was sure he'd tell you they where heading from New York and towards California. And that was one answer but the Helga new their true flight path. Traveling from her Home her friends and her one true love. And heading towards a better Helga G. Pitaki. She was sure her parents wouldn't try and force her back home. Hopefully they would come to understand how much she truly needed some time away. Who knows maybe they all will be batter people at the end of this journey.
"Oh my fair haired prince you will be close to me heart till the day we meet again I love you Arnold." She said quietly. She thought about the possibility that after her little trip of self-discovery she may not be in love with Arnold any more. Helga closed her eyes and remembers how she kissed her sleeping prince last night, and knew she'd always love him forever and true.
Author's note: I had planed to write a Epilog for this store when Helga shows back up one year later. But as I wrote it, it was truing out WAY longer then a Epilog should. So I'm turning it into a separate chapter. I should update soon,