Disclaimer: Don't own anything.

Chapter 11

Rinoa Calls Squall

"Hello, Squall?"

"You have reached the Leonhart residence. No one is here right now to receive your call. Please leave a message when you hear the beep, and we'll call you back as soon as we can."

Beeeep

"Come on, Squall. I know you're home. Pick up the phone. Come on. I'm calling to apologize. I'm throwing myself at your feet to beg for forgiveness. The least you can do is pick up the phone. I know you're there."

"You're throwing yourself at my feet?"

"I knew you were home. You creep!"

"Creep? This is how you beg for my forgiveness?"

"Well, we each have our own special ways."

"Rinoa, I'm really ticked off at you."

"I know. And you're right. I was terrible last night. I was half asleep, but you were absolutely right to get mad at me. I wasn't a very good friend. That's why I'm calling. To apologize. I'm really sorry. You were in pain and all I did was make fun of you. I feel awful about it, Squall. I really do. I hope you'll accept my apology."

"Well, okay. Let's just forget about last night. Wow. I wish I could forget about all of last night!"

"Why? What happened?"

"Well, Quistis Trepe--"

"I told you so!"

Click.

Chapter 11-part 2

Rinoa Calls Squall Back

"Hello?"

"I'm sorry."

"Yeah. You're real sorry, Rinoa."

"It was a joke. Have you lost your sense of humor entirely?"

"Yes, I have. I've lost all my self-respect, all my dignity, and my sense of humor."

"You never had any self-respect or dignity. That's why you needed a sense of humor!"

"I guess that's your idea of an apology."

"I'm just trying to make you laugh. I'm just trying to cheer you up."

"Forget it."

"Well, what happened last night? What was so horrible?"

"You really want to know?"

"Yes. Of course I want to know. I won't make any more jokes. I promise. And I won't say I told you so. Even if it kills me."

"Well, I went over to Quistis Trepe's."

"Yes. Go on."

"I was waiting for you to say 'I told you so.'"

"I promised. I won't say it. Go on."

"Just testing."

"So you went over to Quistis Trepe's house to study chemistry, right?"

"Right. She came on all sexy over the phone in this whispery voice, saying how her parents would be away for the whole night and how she wanted to get to know me better."

"So you ran over there like an eager puppy with your tail wagging and your tongue hanging out."

"Rinoa!"

"Sorry. It just slipped out. Go on."

"What a house! I've driven by it before, but I never realized how immense it is. It's a real mansion."

"I told you. It has wings."

"I walked up the drive but I didn't know which door to go to. There were so many of them, and they all looked like front doors! It was weird."

"Is that your embarrassing story? You couldn't figure out which was the front door?"

"Shut up, Rinoa."

"Okay."

"Anyway, Quistis met me at one of the doors. She acted real glad to see me, like we were close friends or something. She was wearing this sexy sweater and these real tight jeans and--"

"You can skip the description. I already know what Quistis looks like."

"Yeah. Right. So she took my arm and kinda snuggled against me and led me down this long hall to the den. It was a great den. All these dark paneled walls and soft leather couches, and a big, warm fire going in this amazing fireplace."

"Sounds real romantic."

"I'm ignoring your sarcasm. I sat down on the couch in front of the fire, and she sat down real close to me and kept smiling at me, these real warm, meaningful smiles. And she kept saying how she's wanted to get to know me better and how she's wanted to invite me over for months and months. I couldn't believe it!"

"I'll bet."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing. Nothing at all. I was just being sympathetic. Go on."

"Well, I got out my chemistry notes. But she said there was plenty of time for that later. She told me to get comfortable, to take off my shoes. So I did. Then she told me to stretch out on the couch and make myself at home. Then she started to unbutton my shirt."

"She what?"

"She unbuttoned my shirt. She said it was too warm in the den and I'd be more comfortable that way. Then she got up and said not to move, that she would be back with a nice surprise for me."

"A surprise?"

"Yes. A nice surprise. Then she gave me this real sexy, meaningful grin, and left the room. I was in shock. I was in heaven! I was ready to float to the ceiling."

"Don't get disgusting."

"I just lay there on the couch, imagining what the nice surprise was going to be."

"And what was it?"

"Wait. Wait. What it was was a disaster. You're not going to believe this."

"I'm not going to live long enough to believe it! Will you go on?"

"So I'm lying there on the couch in front of the fire with my shoes off, just gazing into the fire, feeling real warm and cozy, waiting for Quistis to return. I don't know how much time went by. Maybe five minutes, ten minutes. I don't know. I guess I was in this dreamlike state."

"Barf."

"I hear someone come in, so I look up from the fire. And it's Quistis's dad!"

"He was home?"

"Yes, he was home. And he wasn't expecting anyone else to be in his home. And he certainly wasn't expecting anyone to be lying on the den couch with his shoes off and his shirt unbuttoned. He was in his underwear. And when he saw me lying on his couch, he jumped almost up to the chandelier and turned bright red."

"That's how you could tell he was surprised to see you?"

"Right. He's a real big guy, built like a bear. It took him a while to be able to speak, but then he started sputtering out questions. You know, 'Who are you? What are you doing here?'"

"Good lord."

"Well, I sat up real quick and smiled at him. I tried to look like I didn't notice that he was in his underwear. I mean, I tried to be real casual. But it wasn't easy because I was surprised to see him, too. And I said, 'I'm with Quistis.'"

"And what did he say?"

"He said, 'No you're not.'"

"What?"

"I told him I came over to study with Quistis. And he said, 'That's impossible. Quistis isn't home.' And I said, 'What do you mean? Of course she's home.' And he said, 'She isn't home. She left more than ten minutes ago. I saw her go out the door and get into her car. She had a date with Irvine Kinneas. She went over to Irvine's house.'"

"You mean--"

"That's right. She left me there. It was all a setup. It was all a setup, a joke. She knew her parents would find me sooner or later and throw me out."

"I don't believe it!"

"I told you you wouldn't."

"So what did you do?"

"What should I do? I put on my shoes. I buttoned my shirt."

"He was standing there the whole time?"

"That's right. In his briefs. Staring at me as if I was some kind of intruder or something, making sure I didn't steal an ashtray or a paperweight off the desk."

"How humiliating."

"Tell me about it."

"Didn't you just want to die?"

"Well--yes. I guess I was even more embarrassed than disappointed. I just felt totally humiliated in every way. Not because Quistis's dad had caught me lying there on his couch like an idiot. But because Quistis, a girl I didn't even know, had played such a mean trick on me."

"Irvine put her up to it."

"I guess--"

"Well, I'm really sorry, Squall."

"Thanks."

"It was a rotten, low thing to do to you."

"Yes, it was."

"I can really understand how you must feel."

"Thanks."

"But I told you so!"

Chapter 11-Part 3

Squall Calls Irvine

"Hello?"

"Hello, Irvine?"

"No. This is his mother. I'll get him for you."

"Hello?"

"Irvine?"

"Yeah."

"It's Squall."

"Ha-ha-ha."

"I know why you're laughing, Irvine."

"Yeah?"

"I just don't know why you did it to me."

"For a joke, man."

"A joke?"

"Yeah."

"I've never been so embarrassed in my life."

"I heard. Ha-ha."

"You heard?"

"Yeah. From Quistis's dad."

"He told you about it?"

"We told him about the joke. He laughed so hard, he choked."

"You were all laughing, huh?"

"Yeah. We all had a good laugh."

"At my expense."

"Yeah."

"But, why?"

"I don't know."

"Come on, Irvine. Why'd you do it to me?"

"For laughs. You know. Same reason you had those girls call me."

"Now, hold on a minute--"

"That girl who came over without any tape in her tape player and pretended to interview me?"

"I didn't tell her to do that."

"She said you did."

"That was all a misunderstanding."

"A misunderstanding, huh? What about your sister? You told her to call me, didn't you?"

"Well, yes. But that wasn't a joke on you. It was a joke on her."

"Very funny. I don't get it."

"It's kind of hard to explain."

"That's okay."

"But I still don't see why you had to play such a dirty trick on me."

"It wasn't a tick. It was just a misunderstanding. Ha-ha-ha!"

"You're a riot, Irvine."

"Yeah. I know."

"So now we're even?"

"Yeah. Right, Squall. Now we're even."

"Well, glad I could give you a few laughs."

"A few? Don't say a few, Squall. We were hysterical for hours. I thought I'd just bust a gut."

"Thanks, Irvine. That's great. Very colorful way of putting it, too."

"But we're even now. No hard feelings, right?"

"What can I say? No hard feelings."

"Now I just have a little favor to do for your sister."

"My sister? What?"

"Uh--I guess that's between her and me."

"Oh, boy."

"I saw your sister in the lunchroom this afternoon. She's kind of cute."

"Yeah. I guess."

"She doesn't look like you at all. Guess that's why she's so cute. Ha-ha-ha!"

"Yeah. Well, I think I've taken enough abuse for one lifetime. I'm going to say goodbye now, Irvine."

"Don't think it hasn't been fun, because it hasn't! Ha-ha-ha!"

"Good one, Irvine. Another good one. You've got a million of 'em, huh?"

"I don't know."

"Well, okay. See you around."

"Not if I see you first. Ha-ha-ha!"

"Right."

"Oh, hey, wait--Squall."

"Yes?"

"About those chemistry notes. Remember? Think I could borrow them tomorrow night?"

"Uh--sure. No problem."

"Great. Thanks a lot, Squall. Later."

"Later, Irvine."