Chapter 3: You Never Do

             Remy LeBeau was raking leaves out of the front yards of the mansion, despite the excruciating pain in his back, he needed something to take his mind off of things, he needed something to distract himself.  The last remnants of light were shining down, it would soon be evening.  Two Jack O' Lanterns grinned cruelly at him from the porch, he'd almost forgotten how close it was to Halloween, it was only two more days away, which meant it was only three more days until his twenty-first birthday.

             It brought new things to realisation, October thirty-first was the day that Rogue and Remy had first learned about MutantX.  Now, almost a year since that night, and there was still supplies of it on the street.  He only hoped this would die out quickly, now that he'd managed to cut the chemical supply off at the source.

             "Aren't you meant to be recuperating?" he heard a soft voice near his back.

             Remy turned, glancing over his shoulder, surprised to see Rogue standing there, hugging herself against the October chills.  "As if you care," he mumbled, he continued to rake leaves, the pain in his back growing with every movement.  He glanced at her out of the corners of his eyes, she looked more Vampire-like than usual, and Remy found himself wondering if she'd even need to make effort to dress up for Halloween. 

             "Kitty seems to be better," Rogue said, changing the subject suddenly.  She felt very out of place standing there, watching him.  A large sweat-stain formed on the back of his grey T-shirt, and with every moment he made, Rogue could see he was having trouble with.  She stepped down the porch slowly.

             "Kitty is still in a bad mood with me," Remy shrugged, this causing him pain, he made a face, drawing his breath sharply through his teeth.

             "Here, let me do that," Rogue took a hold of the rake from him and she began to rake the leaves herself, "Why is Kitty in a bad mood with you."

             Remy shrugged again, wincing at the pain, "Because I kissed her."

             Rogue made a face, remembering it so vividly, as after all, it was only yesterday, "what's the problem with that?" she asked.  "I thought she wanted to be kissed, isn't that why she was going out with you in the first place?"

             "She thought it was insensitive of me to kiss her in front of you, I guess," Remy took the rake back, their hands touched briefly, her thick lace glove under his bare hand, they looked at each other.

             "I wasn't bothered by it," Rogue lied, she held onto the rake still, her hand near his.  She quickly glanced towards his red and black eyes, and felt strangely entranced.

             Remy gave another shrug, wishing the pain in his back would just go away. 

             "Kitty's in a bad mood with me too, I guess she's just a bit messed up from having her brain scrambled," Rogue shrugged.

             "Speaking of scrambling, did you find Jared?" Remy asked coldly, he pulled the rake from her grasp and began to work at the leaves again, still recoiling at the pain.

             "I didn't look…" Rogue trailed off, she watched Remy, "aren't you getting sore?" she asked, "You're not meant to be working yet…"

             "Pain doesn't bother me…" he retorted, still raking.

             Rogue reached out to touch his back in a comforting gesture, she needed to be gentle with him, he seemed on edge, "Remy…"

             He pulled away almost as quickly as her fingers had brushed against the fabric of his t-shirt, "don't," he said coldly, he wanted to tell her to never touch him again, because it only gave him false hope.  Instead, the words came out differently, "it's sore…"

             Rogue moved over to his back, "let me see…" her voice was slight, she took a hold of the hem of his t-shirt and raised the fabric up, she wasn't prepared really, for how bad the bruise on his back actually was, it was slightly yellowing, but for the most part, it still looked pretty painful, "oh my god," she whispered.

             "Just goes to show how human I am," he mumbled, leaning against the rake for support.  "I get hurt like everyone else."

             Rogue felt tears sting at her eyes, it looked so painful, she couldn't imagine how much it must have been hurting him.  She'd been ready to hand over the necklace still hanging around her throat, but now, seeing the contusion before her very eyes, it made her feel so different, almost protective of him, she couldn't explain it.

             "Remy, you shouldn't be raking leaves like this…" Rogue gently brushed the tips of her gloved fingers against his bruised flesh, a tender and loving touch.

             It was that touch that made Remy so weak, and he pulled away, "don't…" he whispered, "don't touch me that way…" he turned towards her, pulling his T-shirt back down slowly.  "If you got no intentions of comin' back to me, I don't want your touch remindin' me of that…"

             Rogue blinked her tears back, "it's not that simple…"

             "I love you, you love me, can't get any simpler than that.  Anything else is just minor details," he commented, still leaning on the rake.

             Rogue looked away, "I also love Jared."

             "Because he can offer you MutantX?" Remy sneered, his dark eyes found her dark green eyes for one moment, before she looked away.  He watched her expressions change, she was brooding, her black and white hair stirred in a gentle October breeze.

             "I never took it," she stated calmly

             "Must be love though, huh?  'Say it with drugs'," he shot at her viciously.

             "Don't stand there and talk to me about drugs, Remy.  It was YOU who handed me liquid MutantX in the first place."

             "I wasn't thinking straight," Remy responded, turning away to rake more leaves.

             "You never do."

             "And Jared does, does he?  Of course, he thinks straight enough to psychically scramble your best friend," Remy responded, "and I swear, if that fucking cunt walks into this place again, I'm not gonna be responsible for my actions."

             Rogue frowned, "what is that supposed to mean?!"

             "It means if he sets foot in these grounds, I'll kill him," Remy stated, he held on tightly to the pole of the rake, knuckles turning white.

             "You're not capable of murder," Rogue stated.

             "Am I not!?  You seem to forget I almost killed the guy who raped you, and if you and Kitty hadn't come to stop me…" Remy reminded.

             "Then you'd be dead too!" Rogue pointed out.

             "Look, Rogue, I don't have time to argue, it's getting dark!" he gestured, "I still have a lot of ground to cover," He looked away from her, eyes glassy.

             Rogue looked up to him, "I know about Carmel."

             Remy spun around and looked at her, "what?" his voice faltered.  The mention of Carmel's voice brought to life the dread in himself he had not thought of since yesterday. 

             "I…I have your email password, you never changed it when I gave it to you, and I logged in to your email…" Rogue drew her breath.

             Remy's mouth dropped, eyes wide.  He couldn't believe it.  She'd been in his email, she'd been sneaking around his personal email…wasn't this the very thing she wasn't meant to do?  How could she have preached about trust in the past and then gone and done this?

             "She wrote you…she seemed mad because you fucked her and left," Rogue said, "and you've had opportunity to tell me about it – but you didn't."

             "Why should I?  You're Jared's girlfriend, not mines," Remy retorted, feeling it was more or less right, how could Rogue tell him off for having slept with someone while she was cavorting with Jared.

             "See, shit like this is exactly why I don't want to take you back, Remy…" she said, "I knew you had to have fucked someone else, I just knew it, because you can't keep your hands to yourself for two minutes.  And it would have happened even if we hadn't broken up!"

             Remy turned and looked at her, "Shit like that happened because YOU more or less ditched me for someone else.  And I assure you if we Hadn't broken up it would have NEVER happened…I value your love more than a quick romp with a stranger."
             "You made me leave!" Rogue said, one tear escaped, she swiped it away before he had time to see it.

             "And I'm sorry!" Remy yelled at her, his voice so loud it hurt as he shouted, "I'm sorry I fucked up!! I'm sorry I slept with Carmel, I'm sorry I kissed Kitty, I'm sorry I made you leave and I'm sorry I'm in love with you!  I'm just really sorry, okay!?" he threw the rake down, "I don't know how many times I can say I'm sorry, and mean it, and make you realise I am!" he yelled at her, spittle flying from his mouth, "I'm SORRY, okay?!" he was so mad he was shaking.

             Rogue looked slightly alarmed, her green eyes wide, catching the last remnants of sunset, a slight orange-pink light beaming on her face, lighting her eyes so that they seemed deeper than he'd ever seen them.  "Why…with any other girl but not me…" she trailed off, "why some stranger, why not me?" her eyes began to tear up again.

             "Because its you!" Remy turned away, he leaned on the rake for support, the pain becoming so excruciating he could barely stand anymore, "when you're with me I'm sated!"

             Rogue held her breath, she could see he was having trouble standing, she wanted to help him, but right now she knew if she went near him it was going to end up in an explosion of emotion from him that she'd never be able to handle.  "Remy…" she said, in a very timid voice.

             Remy turned and looked at her, eyes seeming empty, and dull, the red glow almost seemed to vanish to a dingy dark brown, he swallowed, trying to control his temper with him.  All he wanted was her back, and his anger wasn't helping things.  He was concerned that maybe the pain in his back was making him use anger to negate the agony.

             Rogue slipped the cross necklace off of her neck, and she walked over, took his hand, and dropped it into his open palm, the chain making a soft chink as it landed.  He looked down to the cross, then to her, but she'd already turned and begun to walk away, up the porch and disappearing into the mansion.

             Words couldn't have expressed the despair he felt right then.  He silently pocketed the necklace, and forced himself to rake the leaves again, deciding he wouldn't stop until complete darkness fell, and was in so much pain that he collapsed.