Well well well, I never would be writing this if Fanfiction.net hadn't DELETED FFX Characters In A RAndom Palace Room! I'm serious! It's gone! Man. Maybe it's 'Cause it didn't have a plot? Well now I have to make it up again from scratch since all my files were recently destroyed and I don't remember anything! THAT WAS MY MOST SUCCESSFUL STORY! BUT YOU'VE RUINED IT NOW! Anyhow, I guess I should get to the point, ya?
Everybody remembers that just before you leave Besaid, Yuna wants to take a suitcase that holds presents for the temples they're going to visit, right? If you don't you're stupid. You go now! Anyway, now that they're gone, I can get to the point. Again. Exactly where did that suitcase go? I walked back into Besaid straight after that scene, and it was GONE! So, I have made some crazy chronicles of the suitcases life. And don't you go stealing my idea! My muse is a slippery little bargainer, lending my ideas to everyone. IT'S MINE NOW!
Disclaimer: I don't own Final Fantasy X, but the suitcase has been utterly ignored and is now MINE! Unless you're thinking about taking me to court, 'cause in that case, it's Squaresofts!
Behind…The Suitcase!
Hello. My name is Gary, the suitcase. Everyone thinks of me as just a normal suitcase used to lug around whatever they like, without even asking! But now I'm going to go on a real adventure, on a Pilgrimage, with a summoner no less! I'll bet I'll be thrown at fiends, dropped on boats, people will trip over me, and best of all, and I'll carry things! If that suitcase man could only see me now, going places I've never dreamed!
" You really don't need all that luggage." Some lady yelled from the center of the village. Who are you to talk lady? We're on top of stairs, we're above you! Right Yuna?
" I-It's not mine, they are gifts for the temples we are to visit." She seems intimidated. I don't blame her, that lady in all black looks like a demon or a Goth or Satan's Wife, something like that. Yuna's grip on my handle loosened. No Yuna! Don't give in!
" This isn't a vacation Yuna." Shut up spike boy! Don't say her name like that! Respect her name with your tone of voice, because I'm in charge!
"I guess…I guess you're right." No! Don't leave me here! It stinks horribly and that dog keeps urinating on me! Please! No!
You can't get rid of me! I'll follow you to the ends of the Earth, I'll swim in the sea, I'll—ah to hell with it, I'll just stay here.
I watched them walk away silently, well, most of them anyway. Spike boy was singing some weird song about this girls boobs. I take it that Satan's wife was offended, because she hit him after a few lines. But as soon as they left, the village was quite again. Except for the murders going on in the temple behind me. They were quite loud. So, here I am, left on the steps by myself, when this weird guy in a black trench coat grabs me. Careful buddy! He's a smoker, NOT good for my leather. So I just sit still and let him drag me along. Crazy Ronsos. I mean, doesn't he even try to hide the fact he's with the Ronso Mafia? What the hell is the Mafia doing in Besaid? Besaid is obviously for the ' Smack Bang Ya's'. Watch yourself Mafia boy! Yevon, didn't I just say no smoking?
" Hey Yuna? Don't you think we should've put away that suitcase?" Tidus asked nervously while Wakka and Lulu took care of a nearby fiend. Yuna stood still for a moment. She blinked, and brought her eyes to meet his again.
" Huh? What suitcase?" she looked utterly confused, honey brown hair falling in front of her multi-colored eyes.
" The suitcase! The one you left on the temple steps!" his horribly annoying hand gesture made her smile. She was the only one who didn't feel like choking him when he did that. Little nerves in her head sparked as the wheels inside her head grinded against them, but the light bulb refused to light up. And the little hamster powering her thoughts was obviously starving for more knowledge. Brainpower was down to 0%.
" Yuna? You okay?" Tidus nudged her, and she just fell to the ground like a brick. He started to sweat, his feet twitched in the hope he would turn and sprint, his mind heated up with all the possible decisions, and his hands poured with sweat until even wiping them against his overalls wouldn't even help. His teeth started to chatter and his eyes began scanning the area for possible escape from the protective Wakka and Lulu. It was obvious he couldn't dodge magic, or Wakka's extremely accurate blitzball. So instead, he decided to do some thing that would make it look like he was more worried than he really was. Scream like a woman. That was definitely the wrong thing to do, because no sooner had he done so all hell broke loose with Wakka and Lulu and Kimahri. Wakka had an asthma attack, something strange for a blitzball player, Lulu stumbled and let loose a Fire spell on his yellow 'shirt', and Kimahri started to howl and ran into the forest to go eat some unsuspecting human.
" Waaaaaaah! Get it off! Get it off! It burns!"
" Roll on the ground, roll!" Wakka didn't seem to hear, because her took off screaming down the path. Tidus however, had taken to shaking Yuna.
" Uh, I'll help you two once I find Wakka." Lulu hurried off to find the burning hunk of lo- Bad thoughts Lulu! Must proceed to hurt Wakka's feelings in Kilika in revenge against brain.
Okay, I know how to fix this! Wait…no I don't! He thought to himself. So instead he continued screaming and fell to the ground.
Back With The Suitcase…
Man what is with this Ronso? Opening me up without my permission? This is killing me with embarrassment! Here I am, revealed in all my naked glory to an unruly Ronso hit man. Not o mention all that screaming I can hear in the distance. And all that smoke coming from near the beach? I hope that guys rolling. So anyway, here I am, with this Ronso sniping some guy from Luca. How can I tell? Ronso's would shoot the SBY, and this guy ain't a SBY. I can tell, 'cause anyone that says 'ya?' at the end of the sentence is a member. Ah, so many shootouts back in the day…I was the money suitcase! But now all I carry is nuclear bombs and rifles and weapons of murder. Life is so dull for a suitcase…
Wakka and Lu" Waaaaaaaah! Get it off! Get it off!" Wakka jumped up and down as Lulu tried to calm him down enough just to tell him to roll. Of course, people usually aren't calm while burning. So in the meantime, she thought of cruel things to do to him. Use water to purposely hurt him…laugh manically…throw rocks at him…Oh damn, too late. He'd jumped in the water already.
" Whoa. Man Lu, that's one hell of a strong magic spell, ya? Lucky you didn't fire up my bal-" he stopped when he noticed children listening nearby.
" uh…blitzballs, ya?" Lulu just watched him slide his shirt off his body. For her, it was like a strip show. Except with pants on, obviously. Oh, how she wanted to throw him down a feel those strong muscles grindi- BAD LULU! Wakka is friend. No sexual attraction. NONE. ONLY TOY.
Meanwhile, Yuna's wheels began to turn again. And the first thing she thought was…CRANBERRY SAUCE WITH BUFFALO RUMP!
So what'd ya think? After FF.net ripped my well faring previous story down mercilessly, I went into a depression. Actually, I got too lazy to start up a new story. But finally, after the last three months or so, I got off my ass and finished the last three paragraphs. And that is THAT! Now, just a question to ya'll. Can anyone NOT review? Did anyone have that problem? Because I can't review. I'd like to apologize to Auron's Lover, Qui-Ti, Aurons Mujan, be Nice To Wakka and anyone else's story I was previously reviewing and just...well…stopped. I tried! I really did! Is the problem with my Anti-Virus? I don't think so. Anyone got Norton Anti-Virus and can still review out there? If you can't, email me at Queenoffrench@hotmail.com
That's it for now, 'cept I'll try update more.
ADIOS AMIGOS!
That Cactuar Muse