Never Say Never
Chapter 13 - Sad Realizations
Disclaimer: I don't own anything except the lovely[?] plot =P
Hermione's POV
I shivered, sitting up abruptly in my warm bed, feeling utterly cold even when my toasty sheets were surrounding me. The memories of what had happened in the corridor were just too sharp to forget. I couldn't sleep, I couldn't think; the only thing I could do was remember.
The feeling of his pale, soft, beautiful skin under my finger was still haunting me and I didn't even know what had compelled me to do it in the first place, and then I acutely remembered that he was the one who had pulled me closer to him, making our bodies ever so slightly brush against each other..
I shook my head furiously, trying to clear out the feeling of his strong arms clutching me gently, the way he breathed those powerful words into my ear, the way that he looked me in the eye like an equal..
When had I last felt like this? When I had I last remembered every little detail of time that was spent with a person? When had I had these raging emotions that I couldn't control?
Emerald eyes came to light in my mind and chuckled softly to myself, realizing with a start that the last person that had made me really feel special and get that warm fuzzy feeling was Harry himself. But compared to the feelings that I had at the moment, I wasn't too sure if they were as intense. And trust me that was quite worrying.
I collapsed back onto the comfy blankets and turned over distractedly in the bed, trying to figure out my thoughts. But suddenly, without warning my mind just shut down and exhaustion overtook me and let me drift into a dreamless blissful sleep.
Draco's POV
I had made up my mind. I was going to talk to that stubborn girl sometime soon, in private without those apes following her everywhere. Honestly I couldn't remember a time where I was more annoyed at Potty and the Weasel, they just couldn't let Hermione out of their sight.
I had really done a lot of thinking last night, even my nightmares didn't seem to bad. I had actually thought about her so much that half my homework was still left undone and I had to bribe Blaise to do it for me this morning, but the main point was that she was occupying my thoughts like hell.
It just seemed so wrong though, just such a hopeless fantasy that someone that had loathed me for as long as I could remember, would have such a sudden change and like me too. I mean, of course my feelings for her had obviously changed, but..it was just too much to hope that she would feel the same way too.
Geez, what has happened to my huge ego?! And my endless amounts of confidence in myself?! Ha, gone down the drain with a stupid Muggle girl. Ugh! The feeling of her in my arms was too hard to forget, it just felt so right at the time, she fit perfectly into my frame and the way that she had let her fingers trace their way down my neck was definitely arousing..
Wait a minute. Here I am sitting in History of Magic class with that old geezer of a teacher listening to him droning on and on about one goblin or another and my thoughts are focused on what happened yesterday. What on earth was wrong with me?! I had actually admitted to myself that I wanted her..dear lord! And I could still feel her finger on my skin, Draco! Get a grip on yourself!
I took a deep breath and resolved that I would try as hard as I could to stop liking her. Or at the very least, stop thinking about her 24/7. Suddenly someone caught my eye and I realized that Dumbledore was standing at the doorway to the classroom with a beautiful young girl next to him. Suddenly all thoughts of Hermione were washed from my brain.
"Professor Binns, I hope you don't mind me interrupting your lesson." Said Dumbledore in that deep voice of his. Mind you, it annoyed me to no end but today I was ignoring it, that girl standing next to him was very attractive. There was just something about her that I couldn't put my finger on.
"Of course not, Headmaster. Now, what is it that brings you here?" replied Binns in a stuffy voice.
"Well, I am proud to introduce to the Slytherins their newest house member, Annika Debauche. She has just transferred here from Dourliwood, another school for witches and wizards in London itself. Of course I am sure that you will all do your best to let Annika feel right at home." Here he turned and beamed at Annika who smiled slightly back at him, she then stepped into the classroom gracefully, every move that she made was so elegant and as she settled herself into the spare seat next to Pansy, sitting so poised that Pansy looked like a clumsy elephant next to her.
As she bent down to put her bag on the ground she caught me looking at her and she smiled graciously at me before taking out the books that were needed for this lesson. God, her eyes were so brilliant, those golden brown eyes that seemed to radiate sincerity and comfort, you could just lose yourself in the depths of those exquisite perfectly shaped ovals.
I let myself sneak another glance in her direction and studied the rest of her face, that porcelain skin that was flawless and shiny light brown hair that cascaded down her back and her luscious lips that were curved in an almost perpetual smile. And, of course she was a Slytherin, so basically she had everything over Hermione, she was perfect.
I couldn't tear my eyes away from her, she was so goddamn attractive and I was having difficulty concentrating on the lesson, her face was occupying my thoughts fully now and I smirked a little when I realized that Hermione was out of my mind for a temporary amount of time.
Thank god I'm not thinking too much about that Mudblood anymore, I thought to myself with contempt, trying to bring back my old attitude. The bell suddenly sounded loudly and Hermione was now completely erased from my brain, all thoughts about other girls utterly dismissed at the sight of Annika smiling gently at me, looking expectant.
"You must be Draco Malfoy." She said as I neared her, she was standing close to the exit with her eyes studying me carefully making me stop in my tracks. I was taken aback a little but recovered my composure quickly.
"I sure am. So, what is a pretty girl like you doing in Hogwarts, Annika?" I asked nonchalantly leaning a little bit closer to her.
"Oh, I wish I was pretty." She laughed lightly, her face turning a little more rosier.
"Don't wish for what you already are." I replied with a grin, making her look away quickly a small smile gracing her features, a pink blush spreading on her cheeks.
"Well, I've heard a lot about you, Draco. And about your family, you're all very highly thought of by society." She said quietly, looking at me shyly again.
"Really? That's nice to know, always does good for my ego." Here I grinned again making Annika smile back, god that smile was really dazzling, it lit up her whole face, "Yeah, so anyway back to my original question, what are you doing here? Why did you change from.. Dourliwood was it? To this good for nothing school?"
"Oh, well it's a long story I'm not sure you'll want to hear about it.." She said softly looking at me, "Anyway, I'm really looking forward to the rest of the year, I mean Hogwarts is such a prestigious school..and of course I'll be looking forward to making friends with more people like you."
"And I look forward to making friends with you." I winked at her and took her arm, "Cmon, we'll miss out on Charms if we stay around here any longer!"
Together we walked through the now deserted corridor and I was aware of her every move, her head turning to get a good look at the portraits hanging on the wall, or her amazement at seeing someone slip through a trick step and the way her slim hand had subconsciously made its way into my own hand.
Gee, Annika sure was a welcome distraction from Hermione, I wasn't so sure that she could completely replace her but I was definitely captivated by this beauty standing next to me. But the problem was how could someone take away the feelings that I had had for Hermione so quickly? I mean only around half an hour ago had I felt that all I wanted was that quiet, intelligent, strangely beautiful girl, but now..
"Draco?" said Annika mildly.
"Yes?" I replied, willing myself to stop thinking about Hermione, for Annika's sake.
"I've also heard a lot about Harry Potter, you know the one who defeated the Dark Lord. Are you friends with him?" she asked.
"No, not exactly. Not with that brat I'm not." I growled, "What do you want with him?"
"Oh, nothing much, it's just that he goes to Hogwarts as well and I was hoping to catch a glimpse of him sometime - "
"Annika. You are pureblood aren't you?" I suddenly said, thinking that this was a fantastic opportunity to figure out whether I wanted to know more about her or not and perhaps have a relationship with her..
"Yes, I am. Why do you ask?" she replied, puzzled.
"Well if you are, then I advise you not to hang around with trash like Potter and his friends." I sneered, Hermione's face coming to light in my mind again. I angrily pushed the image out of my mind and instead concentrated on Annika.
"Whatever you say, Draco." She replied, a distant look coming into her eyes.
"Alright, the Charms classroom is right here." I said as it came into view, breaking the awkward silence that had come between us. Now Annika just nodded and went into the classroom sitting next to Pansy again.
I sighed, wishing that I knew what was going on in those girls' heads.
Hermione's POV
"For the final time, Ron, I swear that I'm fine!" I exclaimed as he came over and worriedly asked me if I was all right.
"Yeah well Lavender said that she heard you crying yesterday night." He mumbled.
"Well, obviously Lavender has hearing problems." I snapped back furiously, gathering my Transfiguration things up and putting them neatly back into my bag as the bell sounded for lunch.
"No, she would never lie to me, Mione." Replied Ron desperately, clutching my arm in an effort to hold me back from escaping from him at lunch.
"And I would never lie to you, Ron!" I cried rolling my eyes as I saw Parvati and Harry walking happily, hand in hand out of the classroom in a daze, "Listen I have something really important to do this lunchtime, so I would appreciate it if you left me alone!"
"Hermione!"
"Oh, get lost!"
I stomped huffily away from him and headed towards the Charms classroom to ask Professor Flitwick about the Mesmerizing Charm that he had mentioned in class last week. I was still miffed about how Ron could believe Lavender fully when it was so obvious that she was just trying to have a conversation with him by making up ridiculous rumours about me crying!
I sighed and picked up my pace, nearing the classroom sooner than I had expected. I waited patiently just outside the door as the Slytherins poured out of the classroom and I suddenly realized that Draco must be in this class as well, because Pansy had just left with her group of twittering girls.
So I waited now with anticipation at seeing him again, knowing that I felt something for him and -
I gasped softly as I saw him leaving the room with a stunning looking girl that I had never seen before, but the problem was, they were holding hands. My stomach plummeted and the rage that gripped me was so intense that it was all I could do to stop myself from whipping out my wand and cursing him.
Wasn't it just last night that he had pulled me close to him and told me that he wanted for us to start over again, to be friends and god knows what else..well he had never exactly said that he had felt something for me as well but it was just that something indescribable had passed between us when he had held me in his arms and I was so sure that he had felt that too..
Or maybe it was just me. Maybe I had imagined all this, everything that had happened in the past month or two, when I had thought he had changed for the better was just my wishful thinking and overactive imagination. I sighed again, now tears were really welling up in my eyes and I tried to keep them in, I wasn't going to start crying now in the middle of the corridor.
I don't need him, I told myself firmly, all the feelings that I had for him must go, because he doesn't want me and he'll always think of me as that Mudblood who he had hated since first year. Oh, why had I ever thought that he would really change for me? Why had I ever thought that we could maybe start over again, and that we could stop hating each other?
The feelings that I had kept suppressed came rushing back to the surface again and anger overtook logic and I turned around to find myself standing face to face with a certain redheaded person.
"Ron!" I exclaimed as I buried my face in his chest, hugging him tightly.
"Whoa, that one with Malfoy was a pretty good catch even for him eh?" replied Ron, securely holding me to him, looking down on me with twinkling eyes, thankfully not asking me why I was suddenly hugging him.
"Sure Ron, why don't you go after her and fight with Malfoy over her." I stated bluntly, feeling a bit of déjà vu coming on, remembering the time when Ron had fell for a certain half Veela's charms.
"Nah, I got someone even better here.." He replied smiling at me, tightening his grip on me, "But if she asked me out I guess I wouldn't say no, she's pretty hot.."
"Go away." I mumbled letting go of him and then studying him for a second, I realized that two could play at the game that Malfoy was playing. And anyway, Ron wasn't too bad at all as a person..his looks were definitely welcome and his personality very sunny..
"Actually on second thoughts, Ron stay right here.."
Hey guys,
I just thought I would introduce another character into the story to spice up things a bit and add some interest, I'm sorry to people about the long wait, because I had writer's block..but I promise that something special will happen soon coz we all know that Hermione still likes Draco right? =)
Oh yeah, and just to clear up things - what Hermione means in the last few sentences of this chapter was that Malfoy was just toying around with her and she wants revenge.
Thanks to you all and I'm sorry if I'm confusing you guys! ^.^
[please please please review, I'm getting discouraged by the lack of them! =(]
love,
psychohart
Chapter 13 - Sad Realizations
Disclaimer: I don't own anything except the lovely[?] plot =P
Hermione's POV
I shivered, sitting up abruptly in my warm bed, feeling utterly cold even when my toasty sheets were surrounding me. The memories of what had happened in the corridor were just too sharp to forget. I couldn't sleep, I couldn't think; the only thing I could do was remember.
The feeling of his pale, soft, beautiful skin under my finger was still haunting me and I didn't even know what had compelled me to do it in the first place, and then I acutely remembered that he was the one who had pulled me closer to him, making our bodies ever so slightly brush against each other..
I shook my head furiously, trying to clear out the feeling of his strong arms clutching me gently, the way he breathed those powerful words into my ear, the way that he looked me in the eye like an equal..
When had I last felt like this? When I had I last remembered every little detail of time that was spent with a person? When had I had these raging emotions that I couldn't control?
Emerald eyes came to light in my mind and chuckled softly to myself, realizing with a start that the last person that had made me really feel special and get that warm fuzzy feeling was Harry himself. But compared to the feelings that I had at the moment, I wasn't too sure if they were as intense. And trust me that was quite worrying.
I collapsed back onto the comfy blankets and turned over distractedly in the bed, trying to figure out my thoughts. But suddenly, without warning my mind just shut down and exhaustion overtook me and let me drift into a dreamless blissful sleep.
Draco's POV
I had made up my mind. I was going to talk to that stubborn girl sometime soon, in private without those apes following her everywhere. Honestly I couldn't remember a time where I was more annoyed at Potty and the Weasel, they just couldn't let Hermione out of their sight.
I had really done a lot of thinking last night, even my nightmares didn't seem to bad. I had actually thought about her so much that half my homework was still left undone and I had to bribe Blaise to do it for me this morning, but the main point was that she was occupying my thoughts like hell.
It just seemed so wrong though, just such a hopeless fantasy that someone that had loathed me for as long as I could remember, would have such a sudden change and like me too. I mean, of course my feelings for her had obviously changed, but..it was just too much to hope that she would feel the same way too.
Geez, what has happened to my huge ego?! And my endless amounts of confidence in myself?! Ha, gone down the drain with a stupid Muggle girl. Ugh! The feeling of her in my arms was too hard to forget, it just felt so right at the time, she fit perfectly into my frame and the way that she had let her fingers trace their way down my neck was definitely arousing..
Wait a minute. Here I am sitting in History of Magic class with that old geezer of a teacher listening to him droning on and on about one goblin or another and my thoughts are focused on what happened yesterday. What on earth was wrong with me?! I had actually admitted to myself that I wanted her..dear lord! And I could still feel her finger on my skin, Draco! Get a grip on yourself!
I took a deep breath and resolved that I would try as hard as I could to stop liking her. Or at the very least, stop thinking about her 24/7. Suddenly someone caught my eye and I realized that Dumbledore was standing at the doorway to the classroom with a beautiful young girl next to him. Suddenly all thoughts of Hermione were washed from my brain.
"Professor Binns, I hope you don't mind me interrupting your lesson." Said Dumbledore in that deep voice of his. Mind you, it annoyed me to no end but today I was ignoring it, that girl standing next to him was very attractive. There was just something about her that I couldn't put my finger on.
"Of course not, Headmaster. Now, what is it that brings you here?" replied Binns in a stuffy voice.
"Well, I am proud to introduce to the Slytherins their newest house member, Annika Debauche. She has just transferred here from Dourliwood, another school for witches and wizards in London itself. Of course I am sure that you will all do your best to let Annika feel right at home." Here he turned and beamed at Annika who smiled slightly back at him, she then stepped into the classroom gracefully, every move that she made was so elegant and as she settled herself into the spare seat next to Pansy, sitting so poised that Pansy looked like a clumsy elephant next to her.
As she bent down to put her bag on the ground she caught me looking at her and she smiled graciously at me before taking out the books that were needed for this lesson. God, her eyes were so brilliant, those golden brown eyes that seemed to radiate sincerity and comfort, you could just lose yourself in the depths of those exquisite perfectly shaped ovals.
I let myself sneak another glance in her direction and studied the rest of her face, that porcelain skin that was flawless and shiny light brown hair that cascaded down her back and her luscious lips that were curved in an almost perpetual smile. And, of course she was a Slytherin, so basically she had everything over Hermione, she was perfect.
I couldn't tear my eyes away from her, she was so goddamn attractive and I was having difficulty concentrating on the lesson, her face was occupying my thoughts fully now and I smirked a little when I realized that Hermione was out of my mind for a temporary amount of time.
Thank god I'm not thinking too much about that Mudblood anymore, I thought to myself with contempt, trying to bring back my old attitude. The bell suddenly sounded loudly and Hermione was now completely erased from my brain, all thoughts about other girls utterly dismissed at the sight of Annika smiling gently at me, looking expectant.
"You must be Draco Malfoy." She said as I neared her, she was standing close to the exit with her eyes studying me carefully making me stop in my tracks. I was taken aback a little but recovered my composure quickly.
"I sure am. So, what is a pretty girl like you doing in Hogwarts, Annika?" I asked nonchalantly leaning a little bit closer to her.
"Oh, I wish I was pretty." She laughed lightly, her face turning a little more rosier.
"Don't wish for what you already are." I replied with a grin, making her look away quickly a small smile gracing her features, a pink blush spreading on her cheeks.
"Well, I've heard a lot about you, Draco. And about your family, you're all very highly thought of by society." She said quietly, looking at me shyly again.
"Really? That's nice to know, always does good for my ego." Here I grinned again making Annika smile back, god that smile was really dazzling, it lit up her whole face, "Yeah, so anyway back to my original question, what are you doing here? Why did you change from.. Dourliwood was it? To this good for nothing school?"
"Oh, well it's a long story I'm not sure you'll want to hear about it.." She said softly looking at me, "Anyway, I'm really looking forward to the rest of the year, I mean Hogwarts is such a prestigious school..and of course I'll be looking forward to making friends with more people like you."
"And I look forward to making friends with you." I winked at her and took her arm, "Cmon, we'll miss out on Charms if we stay around here any longer!"
Together we walked through the now deserted corridor and I was aware of her every move, her head turning to get a good look at the portraits hanging on the wall, or her amazement at seeing someone slip through a trick step and the way her slim hand had subconsciously made its way into my own hand.
Gee, Annika sure was a welcome distraction from Hermione, I wasn't so sure that she could completely replace her but I was definitely captivated by this beauty standing next to me. But the problem was how could someone take away the feelings that I had had for Hermione so quickly? I mean only around half an hour ago had I felt that all I wanted was that quiet, intelligent, strangely beautiful girl, but now..
"Draco?" said Annika mildly.
"Yes?" I replied, willing myself to stop thinking about Hermione, for Annika's sake.
"I've also heard a lot about Harry Potter, you know the one who defeated the Dark Lord. Are you friends with him?" she asked.
"No, not exactly. Not with that brat I'm not." I growled, "What do you want with him?"
"Oh, nothing much, it's just that he goes to Hogwarts as well and I was hoping to catch a glimpse of him sometime - "
"Annika. You are pureblood aren't you?" I suddenly said, thinking that this was a fantastic opportunity to figure out whether I wanted to know more about her or not and perhaps have a relationship with her..
"Yes, I am. Why do you ask?" she replied, puzzled.
"Well if you are, then I advise you not to hang around with trash like Potter and his friends." I sneered, Hermione's face coming to light in my mind again. I angrily pushed the image out of my mind and instead concentrated on Annika.
"Whatever you say, Draco." She replied, a distant look coming into her eyes.
"Alright, the Charms classroom is right here." I said as it came into view, breaking the awkward silence that had come between us. Now Annika just nodded and went into the classroom sitting next to Pansy again.
I sighed, wishing that I knew what was going on in those girls' heads.
Hermione's POV
"For the final time, Ron, I swear that I'm fine!" I exclaimed as he came over and worriedly asked me if I was all right.
"Yeah well Lavender said that she heard you crying yesterday night." He mumbled.
"Well, obviously Lavender has hearing problems." I snapped back furiously, gathering my Transfiguration things up and putting them neatly back into my bag as the bell sounded for lunch.
"No, she would never lie to me, Mione." Replied Ron desperately, clutching my arm in an effort to hold me back from escaping from him at lunch.
"And I would never lie to you, Ron!" I cried rolling my eyes as I saw Parvati and Harry walking happily, hand in hand out of the classroom in a daze, "Listen I have something really important to do this lunchtime, so I would appreciate it if you left me alone!"
"Hermione!"
"Oh, get lost!"
I stomped huffily away from him and headed towards the Charms classroom to ask Professor Flitwick about the Mesmerizing Charm that he had mentioned in class last week. I was still miffed about how Ron could believe Lavender fully when it was so obvious that she was just trying to have a conversation with him by making up ridiculous rumours about me crying!
I sighed and picked up my pace, nearing the classroom sooner than I had expected. I waited patiently just outside the door as the Slytherins poured out of the classroom and I suddenly realized that Draco must be in this class as well, because Pansy had just left with her group of twittering girls.
So I waited now with anticipation at seeing him again, knowing that I felt something for him and -
I gasped softly as I saw him leaving the room with a stunning looking girl that I had never seen before, but the problem was, they were holding hands. My stomach plummeted and the rage that gripped me was so intense that it was all I could do to stop myself from whipping out my wand and cursing him.
Wasn't it just last night that he had pulled me close to him and told me that he wanted for us to start over again, to be friends and god knows what else..well he had never exactly said that he had felt something for me as well but it was just that something indescribable had passed between us when he had held me in his arms and I was so sure that he had felt that too..
Or maybe it was just me. Maybe I had imagined all this, everything that had happened in the past month or two, when I had thought he had changed for the better was just my wishful thinking and overactive imagination. I sighed again, now tears were really welling up in my eyes and I tried to keep them in, I wasn't going to start crying now in the middle of the corridor.
I don't need him, I told myself firmly, all the feelings that I had for him must go, because he doesn't want me and he'll always think of me as that Mudblood who he had hated since first year. Oh, why had I ever thought that he would really change for me? Why had I ever thought that we could maybe start over again, and that we could stop hating each other?
The feelings that I had kept suppressed came rushing back to the surface again and anger overtook logic and I turned around to find myself standing face to face with a certain redheaded person.
"Ron!" I exclaimed as I buried my face in his chest, hugging him tightly.
"Whoa, that one with Malfoy was a pretty good catch even for him eh?" replied Ron, securely holding me to him, looking down on me with twinkling eyes, thankfully not asking me why I was suddenly hugging him.
"Sure Ron, why don't you go after her and fight with Malfoy over her." I stated bluntly, feeling a bit of déjà vu coming on, remembering the time when Ron had fell for a certain half Veela's charms.
"Nah, I got someone even better here.." He replied smiling at me, tightening his grip on me, "But if she asked me out I guess I wouldn't say no, she's pretty hot.."
"Go away." I mumbled letting go of him and then studying him for a second, I realized that two could play at the game that Malfoy was playing. And anyway, Ron wasn't too bad at all as a person..his looks were definitely welcome and his personality very sunny..
"Actually on second thoughts, Ron stay right here.."
Hey guys,
I just thought I would introduce another character into the story to spice up things a bit and add some interest, I'm sorry to people about the long wait, because I had writer's block..but I promise that something special will happen soon coz we all know that Hermione still likes Draco right? =)
Oh yeah, and just to clear up things - what Hermione means in the last few sentences of this chapter was that Malfoy was just toying around with her and she wants revenge.
Thanks to you all and I'm sorry if I'm confusing you guys! ^.^
[please please please review, I'm getting discouraged by the lack of them! =(]
love,
psychohart