That Legolas, Man!

by leggy-stinks

Sam hates Legolas Green-Eggs-and-Ham-style! Caution: Not as tame as the Green Eggs and Ham rhyme

Disclaimer:  I do not own Legolas, Sam, OR his frying pan.  And I'm certainly no Dr.     Seuss, nor do I own the rhyme Green Eggs and Ham.  I simply borrowed it. :)

That Legolas, Man!

I am Sam.

Sam I am.

I do not like that Legolas, Man.

I'll hit him with my frying pan!

Would you like him here or there?

I would not like him here or there.

I would not like him anywhere.

I do not like that Legolas, Man.

I'll hit him with my frying pan!

Would you, could you, on a horse?

If it means he'll leave…of course!

Would you, could you, in the rain?

If it'll damage his puny brain.

Would you like him here or there?

I would not like him here or there.

I would not like him ANYWHERE!

I do not like that Legolas, Man.

I'll hit him with my frying pan!

You do not like him.

So you say.

Think about him!  Think about him!

And you may.

Think about him and you may, I say.

I think about hitting him with my pan.

And I realize I do like that Legolas, Man.

I do!  I like him! And Sam I am!

And I would like him here or there.

I would like him ANYWHERE!

I do so like that Legolas, Man!

So I raise my frying pan,

And I hit Legolas on the head.

I like Legolas

…when he's dead.

MWAA-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

MWAA-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

MWAA-HAHAHAHAHAHAH-*cough cough cough cough*

A/N:  Poor, deranged Sam.  But he was right, wasn't he?  I mean, c'mon…that Legolas, Man!  Who wouldn't want to hit him with a frying pan?  Hehe :)  Well, I hope you enjoyed that rhyme.  Thanks for reading!  And an extra thanks to those who review! :)