Growing Up

The Barbics, Glens and any other Disney characters are copyrighted to Disney and we claim no ownership. However, any new characters are copyrighted to Ulisa, Silver Fox and Cheetah the Furry. This plot is a collaboration of Ulisa, Silver Fox, and Cheetah the Furry.

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More than anything, Sunni felt guilt. She and all the rest of them had been so selfish. They had looked over a very probable danger because it was easier than facing it. Gruffi was the only one that had had that strength and his impulse towards the rest of them had not been enough.

She hated herself. That was one reason why she had been so melancholy lately. Her mind and heart was a mess with what ifs and if onlys. She knew that such thoughts would achieve nothing but…

The girl sat up, wiping at her moist eyes. She lit her candle and with enough light to see, she turned her gas lamp on low. It was actually more of a oil lamp she supposed but the name stuck because that was what Barbics referred to them as, because Buddi said that the flame flicked the way some natural gas they used did.

Sunni kept still a mere moment. That faded swiftly and she climbed to her feet, unable to sleep. She wanted to talk about her feelings but she didn't dare do it with Gruffi. Or any of the other Glens for that matter; it was a first time for all of them and their pain was still fresh.

Opening her door, Sunni stuck her head out. A few Barbics were still patrolling the city's walls but for the most part the city was silent and asleep. Sneaking out, Sunni crept along the halls. She left the Glens' quarters and made her way towards the Barbics.

Buddi's was where she was headed. She knew it was inconsiderate of her, especially this late,(the clock had just recently chimed one) but she needed answers to this guilt and other feelings and felt that any more waiting would burst her like a balloon. She shifted to walk upon the balls of her feet as she passed the adult Barbic rooms, especially Ursa's. Ursa had keen hearing, Buddi had told her.

As she finally managed to reach her best friend's door, it opened.

Buddi was still awake.

He pulled Sunni into his room and then shut the door. Standing on a chair, he lit the overhead lights. Sunni saw that although his lights had been off, he had never fallen asleep. He said nothing a moment and then turned to face his best friend.

"What are you doing up?"

Sunni sighed deeply and then collapsed upon the bed, slumping her shoulders. She suddenly felt foolish but she was here now. She decided to ask the other thing on her mind,

"Are you alright?"

Buddi nodded. "yeah. Ursa, Grubbi and I are going on a haiana in the morning though."

"A…what?"

"Kinda like a soul search. Ursa thinks I need one."

"How long?"

"A month."

"A month?" Sunni didn't want to sound like she was whining but she couldn't help it. "A whole month?"

Buddi nodded, "I don't like it anymore than you but that's the way it is."

Sunni nodded; she didn't want Buddi to go but she also knew that he was probably disliking this just as much as she was, probably more. If he had a way to get out of it, he would have already used it. Since he was still going, she guessed that there was no way he could get outta it. So she decided not to complain and simply offer her support.

Buddi and her were silent a moment before Buddi said as he started to twirl his flute.

"Sunni, that's not why you came. What is it? I know you wouldn't have risked waking me up for that."

Sunni growled. She sometimes wished that Buddi didn't know her so well. But she couldn't deny that…well, she could but it would make her look like an idiot. She took a deep breath. But she couldn't. she buried her face into her hands and cried. She did this for a time but then found someone embracing her and immediately recognized Buddi's scent.

"Well…if that you didn't come in here to find out how I was, why did you come in here? And what's with the waterworks?"

Sunni wiped at her eyes and laid her temple against her best friend's chest. She shifted her eyes upward and sighed,

"I came to you because I figured you'd be able to relate."

Buddi froze and started to realize what Sunni was aiming at. It made his heart freeze but he told himself that she was right. He was probably the one person she could relate to. He took a breath.

"It's the Glen, isn't it?"

Sunni nodded. "I…I….Cubbi was hysterical for a few weeks, remember?"

Buddi nodded.

"So was I, Buddi." She continued, sitting back and pushing her blond tresses behind her neck. Her eyes fell and then she spoke, but her eyes never left her hands, neatly folded in her lap. "I tried not to be. But now…all these different emotions are conflicting and I….I hate myself! How could-"

"It wasn't your fault," Buddi told her gently, knowing precisely the type of emotions she meant. "I know you're feeling angry: angry at yourself, angry at Gum, angry at the world. You blame yourself, you blame Igthorn, you blame the others. You're lost, confused…no clue what else to do. Am I right?"

Sunni smiled, "On all accounts."

Buddi nodded. Sunni grabbed his hands,

"Buddi, I won't ask you tell me about…"

"No, it's okay."

"You're sure-"

"Yeah."

"Well…" she hesitated and then blurted, "How did you get over it?"

"I never did. I just learned to cope,"

He read her pained face, "The emotions of loss won't leave but they'll fade. And talk to Grammi, anyone…the one thing you do need to get outta your mind is that it was your fault. Because it wasn't."

"Buddi…did you-"

"Uh-huh. For a few weeks actually."

"What happened?"

Buddi closed his eyes, "You really wanna know?"

"I know it hurts you Buddi. But…I really need to know. Please?"

Buddi knew comparing his experience with hers would help. But…it still burned, still hurt. But he gazed into those beautiful eyes and he caved.

"All right."

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