Chapter Twenty-Five
Hiding in the Shadows
The next day was, as surprising as it was, good. Hermione was as happy as ever and Ron and Ginny thanked Harry over and over again every two minutes for saving their dad. As it is, it seems they had gotten an owl from Mrs. Weasley telling them about their father's awaited death Sunday at sun down and not even an hour after that, they got another owl saying that their father had broken out.
Harry, more than ever, was uneasy around Neville. Harry had seen his parents. not just his own, but Neville's also. He messed with his hair a bit.
After they ate Harry and Ron played a game of wizarding chess. Ron still kicked Harry's butt, but over the years, Harry had gotten better and the game was at least lasting longer.
And then 10 o'clock rolled around, and Harry was dreading it. He couldn't look Angel. Seri. in the eyes after what they had gone through. and more than ever, Harry was feeling guilty about Sirius's fate. Perhaps, he was better dead.
The Defense Against the Dark Arts room was different. The window drapes where thrown open and sun light flooded in. Seri was sitting on her desk, legs swing, humming to herself, flipping threw a magazine.
Ron sat down next to Harry, and looked as confused as Harry looked. Hermione and Neville were sitting in front of them; head's spinning around the room.
"Good morning class!" Seri sang, as she jumped off her desk.
Harry's mouth kind of dropped open. She was different; much different. It seemed Harry was the only one that notice, a lot of people gasped at her.
Seri's hair was down and tightly curled at the ends and she was wearing her black family robes. But there was something uniquely different about her. She was smiling. a true smile, one they made her look like she was 18 and not some old maid. And her eyes, they weren't hiding or dark, but smiling and laughing.
Harry grinned.
"Angelica?" Malfoy gasped.
"No," Seri corrected, "You can call me Professor Black, Black or Seri. but Angelica was my mother's name."
Malfoy grunted. "Her name was Jasmine."
Seri tilted her head sweetly and stared down at him and shook her head. "Today we are going to be studying Phoenixes."
The class moved in their seat, pulling out parchment and quills.
"Phoenixes are the one breed of birds. living things. that can not die." Seri said slowly. "When they do die, they burn, turn to ashes and then are born again from the ashes."
Her eyes gave a twinkle.
"A Phoenix as strong healing powers. it's song can rejoice any heart and soul, any that still has love enough for it to do so. and it's tears have healing powers."
Hermione and Ron looked at Harry before writing this down.
"A phoenix is a very power creature indeed, and also one of the most feeling. Its tears alone will not heal. but the tears it shed in pure sorrow, grief or happiness. When a phoenix cares enough about someone to cry for or over them. then the tears work.
"A phoenix's song is like that also. When it sings, it sings for its owner's enjoyment or to give someone hope and self confidence. No one can really understand how or why and phoenix thinks this way."
Harry had stop taking note somewhere in the middle of this. His quill leaned on his hand, no longer touching the parchment and he stared out into space. Fawks had cared enough about him to cure in the Chamber of Secrets. in the grave yard when Harry was against Voldemort, and phoenix song was singing to him. He gave a week smile.
Lost in thought, the rest of the class went on and was over.
"Remember, DA meeting tonight!" Seri called after them.
The rest of the day was a blur. Harry only remembers thinking about the Order, the rescue form Azkaban, Sirius and what had happened to him and what he saw beyond the veil.
Before he, or Ron and Hermione knew it, it was time to go DA.
The whole sixth year crowded into the Great Hall. Seri was standing on the high table. She was pacing, like she always did, hand behind her back and smiling down as the mass below her.
"Hello everyone!" She called. "Today we are going to practice out counter curses!"
They went on practicing their counter curses. Ron and Harry got pretty good at it. but Neville was so torn up, Hermione knocked him off his feet with a tickling charm.
"Neville, come on. this might save your life some day." Seri said calmly, putting her small hand on his shoulder. Neville pressed his lips together and nodded.
The Slytherins thought it was great fun though, as they always did, messed up, knocking out their Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw partners. It seemed that Slytherin was out to get Seri.
"Okay, okay." she said with a great sigh, after unjinxing a red headed Ravenclaw girl. "You all may leave."
In a great rush, everyone fled the Great Hall.
"Wait!" Seri called, standing on tip to, trying to see over the crowd. "Harry, Hermione, Ron, Neville, stay here a bit."
Confused, the four of them let the crowd mold around them.
"What is it Professor?" Hermione piped.
"Well, since you four seem to find yourself in trouble." She smile kind of smiled. "Dumbledore and myself think we should teach you a few. extra. curses."
"Like what?" Neville said nervously.
"Well, not to harm anyone. but in your defense see." Seri explained. "Like I said the first day of class. knowing what's coming your way is the first step to fighting it."
Hermione gasped, bring a hand to her mouth.
"I'm going to teach you all the Unforgivable Curses."
"But Professor." Ron started, flabbergasted, "Those are. Unforgivable!"
"Only when used for improper reasons." Seri said softly. "If you use them against Death Eaters or anyone who has half the mind to put them on you, you may."
"But." Neville said, whiter than Harry had ever seen him.
"Neville, you can't live your life afraid of anything. Being afraid only proves that you have no self confidence." Seri placed a hand on his shoulder. "You have to know who and what you are. and Neville. you're not afraid."
There was silence.
"Anyway, we very well can't do it here." Seri said. "My office then."
The five of them left the Great Hall. Neville was gripping and re- gripping his hands as though his was waiting for something very important. His eyes looked glazed over and his skin looked colorless.
"Come on now," Seri said, the sweetness draining from her voice. "Now, Weasley, you first."
"Why. me." Ron gulped.
"Because I said so!" Seri ordered. "The words are Crucio. You have to mean it and you have to want, really want to watch the person squirm in pain!"
"Who?" Ron said shortly.
"Me." Seri said firmly.
Harry, Hermione and Neville all backed away into a corner, leaving Ron on one end and Seri on the other.
"N.nn.now?" Ron said.
"Now."
"Cr.cru.crui.o" Ron stuttered.
A flash flew at Seri and hit her softly in the chest.
"Ron, don't make me do it the hard way," Seri mumbled under her breath. She straightened up and fixed her eyes on Ron. Her eyes were no longer what they were that morning; they were hard, mean and full of hatred. "Come on Weasley. I taught your brother that one and he got it first try."
"Which brother?" Ron asked innocently.
"I knew you were the youngest one, but I didn't know you were the dumbest." Seri piped bitterly. Ron dropped his mouth open in horror. "Is that all you got! I told you to curse me, not send off fireworks for my enjoyment!"
"Seri?" Neville asked softly.
"You always were the worst of them all. Bill's got style. Charlie's got talent. Percy's in crowd. Fred and George are funny. and what are you? Famous Harry Potter's little side kick." Seri sneered.
Ron was shaking, staring at her in disbelief.
"A disgrace!" Seri shouted. "You are a lanky, red headed git, with no proper parents to buy you new robes! What are those second hand or did your mother pull them out of a trash can."
"Seri. please." Harry said.
"Oh, I see. You are proud of your father. Think it is noble for him to work with filthy muggles and get paid barely enough for his family. If you ask me, the whole lot of you isn't worth one of his measly pay checks."
"CRUCIO!" Ron shouted.
A bust of a flames hit Seri straight in the chest, hard and fast. She stumbled and was against the wall. An inch of pain shown on her face, but then praise.
"Granger." She bellowed, totally throwing the curse off.
Ron was shaking. His face was white and when he got beside Harry, he collapsed onto the floor, his hands in his hair.
Hermione looked at Neville than to Harry. She gulped, and stepped forward into Ron's place.
Seri had straightened herself up. She was grinning mischievously and staring at Hermione.
"Going to make it hard Granger?" She said.
"Professor, honestly, why can't we do it on something else; an animal or a dumpy?" Hermione suggested.
"If I wanted your opinion, I would have asked for it. Now, do what you are told."
"Fine," Hermione said airily. "Crucio."
A stronger than Ron's first time, but not as powerful as his second hit Seri. An evil frown came on her face.
"You filthy mudblood!" She cried.
"Give it up," Hermione whined.
"Anything you can't read out of a book, you can't do. I'll be surprised if you couldn't walk without reading how to first." Seri had pure hatred on her face. "You can't do anything! All you know if what you read from a book. You don't know love, or bravery and you sure as hell don't know power! You are a dirty, little, moppy headed girl with big teeth and a bad breeder."
There was a short silence.
"Are you done?" Hermione asked arms crossed.
"Haven't even started." Seri said with a grin. "You know, I believe your parents are next on the list. The Dark Lord as been wiping out streets after streets of muggles. He thinks he needs to get rid of your parents. Oh, don't think it's because of you. it's because of Potter. Your parents, your grimy muggle parents will be a piece in his Lord's chess game."
Hermione was glowing pink now.
"One by one, your family will die. and for no reason. They will die simply because of what they are. and you are no better. Your breeding was wrong. and the only think you got was a book and a once of magic from it."
"Crucio!" Hermione said firmly.
Again, flames hit Seri in the chest. Her face turned in anguish, but then that died and she threw the curse off. She straightened up and Harry swore her saw a grin twinkle in the corner of her mouth.
"Longbottom."
Hermione, looking sort of pleased with herself, leaned against the wall next to Harry and glared down at Seri with I-showed-you-so-ha grin on her face.
"Sirius. I don't. please. don't." Neville stuttered.
"Say the words."
"I won't."
"Say the words that drove your parents crazy!" Seri sneered.
"Stop," Neville put his hands to his ears and started shaking his head.
"You want to say them. You want to kill someone, anyone. It isn't fair. you were robbed."
"Stop."
"They didn't even know who you were Neville."
"Please."
"They didn't remember you. they didn't want to."
"No."
"A half squib son. who would want to. Frank and Alice Longbottom were brave, smart and witty Aurors. how did they get a."
"It's."
".son like."
".Not."
".you!"
"TRUE!" Neville fell to his knees.
"Lestrange told me how it was. She said your father came on bending knees, praying them not to harm him. Praying to them that he didn't know anything."
"He did not."
"Your mum cried. she told them to leave her alone."
"Stop."
"Bellatrix said it was easy to drive your mum crazy. She said it was so quick with her that all she had to do was smack her."
"Stop."
"Your mum was crazy, Neville. She was a loony old bat. was and is!"
"Shut up!" Neville screamed. "CRUCIO!"
A fire ball of flames knocked Seri off her feet, sending her crashing into the wall. Her face was coiled in throbbing. Her eyes grew tender and pleading, before she lifted the cruse off her self.
She was gasping for breath. Neville dropped his wand and dropped to the floor were he was. "Come on Neville," Harry was kneeling beside him. He picked up the wand and handed it to Neville.
"Thanks Harry," Neville said breathless. Harry helped him up.
"No," Seri said, helping herself up. "Potter, you next."
"Some other."
"Now."
"Fine."
Neville helped himself to the wall and collapsed next to Ron, pale and beady eyed.
"You've got to learn Potter."
"Learn what?"
"That just because your father was a slimly little git you can't be one."
"My father wasn't a git. not as slimly as yours." Harry barked, before catching his words.
Seri smiled, "Do you believe that? No, you don't. I see it. You are ashamed of your father. hiding in his shadow. You can't get out of it. it looms around you."
"Shut up," Harry said.
"It's true though. You hate your father almost as bad as you hate me. You hate the truth. You like thinking your father was a hero. a strong, gallant hero. but he wasn't. he was a die hard fool!"
"Stop it!"
"No matter how fast you run, his shadow is always casted on you. He was smart Harry. you barely make passing grades. he was handsome. you have a scar on your forehead. he was brave. and you crumble at the mere thought of him."
"I DO NOT!"
"You wish Sirius was your father. Sirius was always there. Sirius helped you. Sirius is the only father you have." Seri snarled.
"JAMES POTTER IS MY FATHER!"
"Only by blood. At night you curse him for leaving you alone. at times you hate him. because all along. Snape was right about him."
"NO!" Harry yelled. His fist tightened around his wand. She was getting under his skin. She was trying to boil his blood and make him curse her, but he wouldn't do it.
But what got him the most. everything she was saying. it was true..
"Stop living a lie Harry! He was the father you never had. and the father you never wanted."
"It's not true!" Harry was on the blink to tears, but choked them back.
It wasn't true. he had met hi father behind the veil... and he was everything Harry knew he would be. He was funny. witty. and loving. he was the dad Harry always wanted. and no matter how much he thought he wanted Sirius as a father. Sirius could never be what James Potter could have been.
"It's not true." Harry said softly. He dropped his wand. "I won't do it. I don't want to hurt you."
Seri smiled, and it wasn't evil or mischievous, but a smile. "Very good Harry."
"What?" Ron said, finally regaining his voice.
"This was your fist test. Though all three of you did the spell, very, very well. you forget my first instruction. you have to know who and what you are. self confidence. You three let me get under your skin. bring out the deepest fears in you and say what you are afraid to say."
"I don't understand." Harry said, picking up his wand.
"Ron is afraid of being the worst of all his brothers. and the fact that his family isn't rich. Hermione is scared of being nothing but a book worm and for her family. Neville is troubled by his parent's fate."
"And I'm frightened of my dad's memory." Harry continued.
"Right." Seri said, nodding. "Knowing your fears and facing them is the first step. when you are fighting a death eater or Voldemort himself. they will know how to make you crack. they'll know what scares you most and will turn it against you. That's why you have to know yourself enough to over come that and control it."
"So control our fears." Hermione said softly.
"Exactly." Seri said. "I'm not going to teach you any farther. you know enough. but when the times comes for you to use it. think of every foul thing about the person. imagine them saying the things I just said to you and punishing them for it. Use the only weapon they have against you. against them."
"Our fears." Ron completed.
"Your fears." Seri copied.
There was a slight nervous sense around them. Neville was shaking. and it was no wonder to Harry. Their deepest fears and taunts had just been revealed and they could no longer imagine them not being there.
The rest of the week was slow going. The next day, Harry was like a robot. talking and goofing around, but still not having his whole self in the day. That afternoon, when he had Occlumency, it was terrible. They were now at the stage, where Seri was using Legilimency on him. The only memories she got out of him were ones of his father. from when he was alive, from behind the veil and from Snape's memory.
And so on it went, Ron, Hermione and Neville were acting the same way as Harry. They had nothing hiding anymore, at least not from themselves. Katie was wearing Ron and Harry out with Quidditch practice, which they had every night. Before they knew it. Friday had rolled around. And that afternoon, Harry found himself traveling down to the dungeons for his animagius lesson.
He had been thinking about this since that day in Azkaban. Why couldn't he keep a stag? Why didn't it feel right? What was going on?
And when he entered the room, it seemed Seri had been asking herself the same thing.
"Oh, Harry. there you are. please, please, sit down." She motioned toward the seat in front of her. "We need to talk."
Harry took a deep breath, "I don't want to be a stag any more."
"What?"
Harry looked up at her, she was sitting on the desk, totally dumb founded. He gulped and looked back down at his feet. "Being a stag had something to do with my dad. but I'm not my dad. and I'm sick and tiered of trying to be."
"Harry." Seri started.
"Don't, please don't." Harry cut in, "I want to be something different. not a stag."
"Harry, I know." Seri said softly.
"You do?" Harry said, taking a breath from talking so fast. "But why did you let me chose a stag?"
"Did you learn anything from being a stag?" Seri asked sweetly.
"Well." Harry thought of this. nothing productive he was going to change animal anyway. "Not really."
"Oh come one Harry. think. what did you learn?"
Harry sighed and became thinking about this. What did he learn? He learned he wasn't supposed to be a stag and that when you weren't supposed to be that animal your body threw it off. He learned. "I learn I wasn't my father." He said softly.
"Exactly!" Seri called cheerfully. "You learn something about your father!"
"No I didn't." Harry trailed off.
"Yes you did. you learn one very, extremely important thing! You are not James Dean Potter!" Seri yelled, throwing her hands in the air. "And you learned that no matter how much you love you father, following in his foot steps does not make you love him any more. You and your father are two different people completely and just because you found out your father isn't exactly what you pictured him as."
"Seri." Harry said, looking at her.
"I sent it Harry." She said childishly. "I found it half written on his desk and thought you might believe Sirius if you didn't Remus or me."
Harry took a gulp. she had sent Sirius's letter. it all made sense now. it all made sense.
"Why didn't you tell me before?" Harry finally said.
"Because I thought it would mean more coming from an invisible person." Seri said, nodding in agreement. "An invisible person to help from hiding under an invisible shadow."
The next day was, as surprising as it was, good. Hermione was as happy as ever and Ron and Ginny thanked Harry over and over again every two minutes for saving their dad. As it is, it seems they had gotten an owl from Mrs. Weasley telling them about their father's awaited death Sunday at sun down and not even an hour after that, they got another owl saying that their father had broken out.
Harry, more than ever, was uneasy around Neville. Harry had seen his parents. not just his own, but Neville's also. He messed with his hair a bit.
After they ate Harry and Ron played a game of wizarding chess. Ron still kicked Harry's butt, but over the years, Harry had gotten better and the game was at least lasting longer.
And then 10 o'clock rolled around, and Harry was dreading it. He couldn't look Angel. Seri. in the eyes after what they had gone through. and more than ever, Harry was feeling guilty about Sirius's fate. Perhaps, he was better dead.
The Defense Against the Dark Arts room was different. The window drapes where thrown open and sun light flooded in. Seri was sitting on her desk, legs swing, humming to herself, flipping threw a magazine.
Ron sat down next to Harry, and looked as confused as Harry looked. Hermione and Neville were sitting in front of them; head's spinning around the room.
"Good morning class!" Seri sang, as she jumped off her desk.
Harry's mouth kind of dropped open. She was different; much different. It seemed Harry was the only one that notice, a lot of people gasped at her.
Seri's hair was down and tightly curled at the ends and she was wearing her black family robes. But there was something uniquely different about her. She was smiling. a true smile, one they made her look like she was 18 and not some old maid. And her eyes, they weren't hiding or dark, but smiling and laughing.
Harry grinned.
"Angelica?" Malfoy gasped.
"No," Seri corrected, "You can call me Professor Black, Black or Seri. but Angelica was my mother's name."
Malfoy grunted. "Her name was Jasmine."
Seri tilted her head sweetly and stared down at him and shook her head. "Today we are going to be studying Phoenixes."
The class moved in their seat, pulling out parchment and quills.
"Phoenixes are the one breed of birds. living things. that can not die." Seri said slowly. "When they do die, they burn, turn to ashes and then are born again from the ashes."
Her eyes gave a twinkle.
"A Phoenix as strong healing powers. it's song can rejoice any heart and soul, any that still has love enough for it to do so. and it's tears have healing powers."
Hermione and Ron looked at Harry before writing this down.
"A phoenix is a very power creature indeed, and also one of the most feeling. Its tears alone will not heal. but the tears it shed in pure sorrow, grief or happiness. When a phoenix cares enough about someone to cry for or over them. then the tears work.
"A phoenix's song is like that also. When it sings, it sings for its owner's enjoyment or to give someone hope and self confidence. No one can really understand how or why and phoenix thinks this way."
Harry had stop taking note somewhere in the middle of this. His quill leaned on his hand, no longer touching the parchment and he stared out into space. Fawks had cared enough about him to cure in the Chamber of Secrets. in the grave yard when Harry was against Voldemort, and phoenix song was singing to him. He gave a week smile.
Lost in thought, the rest of the class went on and was over.
"Remember, DA meeting tonight!" Seri called after them.
The rest of the day was a blur. Harry only remembers thinking about the Order, the rescue form Azkaban, Sirius and what had happened to him and what he saw beyond the veil.
Before he, or Ron and Hermione knew it, it was time to go DA.
The whole sixth year crowded into the Great Hall. Seri was standing on the high table. She was pacing, like she always did, hand behind her back and smiling down as the mass below her.
"Hello everyone!" She called. "Today we are going to practice out counter curses!"
They went on practicing their counter curses. Ron and Harry got pretty good at it. but Neville was so torn up, Hermione knocked him off his feet with a tickling charm.
"Neville, come on. this might save your life some day." Seri said calmly, putting her small hand on his shoulder. Neville pressed his lips together and nodded.
The Slytherins thought it was great fun though, as they always did, messed up, knocking out their Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw partners. It seemed that Slytherin was out to get Seri.
"Okay, okay." she said with a great sigh, after unjinxing a red headed Ravenclaw girl. "You all may leave."
In a great rush, everyone fled the Great Hall.
"Wait!" Seri called, standing on tip to, trying to see over the crowd. "Harry, Hermione, Ron, Neville, stay here a bit."
Confused, the four of them let the crowd mold around them.
"What is it Professor?" Hermione piped.
"Well, since you four seem to find yourself in trouble." She smile kind of smiled. "Dumbledore and myself think we should teach you a few. extra. curses."
"Like what?" Neville said nervously.
"Well, not to harm anyone. but in your defense see." Seri explained. "Like I said the first day of class. knowing what's coming your way is the first step to fighting it."
Hermione gasped, bring a hand to her mouth.
"I'm going to teach you all the Unforgivable Curses."
"But Professor." Ron started, flabbergasted, "Those are. Unforgivable!"
"Only when used for improper reasons." Seri said softly. "If you use them against Death Eaters or anyone who has half the mind to put them on you, you may."
"But." Neville said, whiter than Harry had ever seen him.
"Neville, you can't live your life afraid of anything. Being afraid only proves that you have no self confidence." Seri placed a hand on his shoulder. "You have to know who and what you are. and Neville. you're not afraid."
There was silence.
"Anyway, we very well can't do it here." Seri said. "My office then."
The five of them left the Great Hall. Neville was gripping and re- gripping his hands as though his was waiting for something very important. His eyes looked glazed over and his skin looked colorless.
"Come on now," Seri said, the sweetness draining from her voice. "Now, Weasley, you first."
"Why. me." Ron gulped.
"Because I said so!" Seri ordered. "The words are Crucio. You have to mean it and you have to want, really want to watch the person squirm in pain!"
"Who?" Ron said shortly.
"Me." Seri said firmly.
Harry, Hermione and Neville all backed away into a corner, leaving Ron on one end and Seri on the other.
"N.nn.now?" Ron said.
"Now."
"Cr.cru.crui.o" Ron stuttered.
A flash flew at Seri and hit her softly in the chest.
"Ron, don't make me do it the hard way," Seri mumbled under her breath. She straightened up and fixed her eyes on Ron. Her eyes were no longer what they were that morning; they were hard, mean and full of hatred. "Come on Weasley. I taught your brother that one and he got it first try."
"Which brother?" Ron asked innocently.
"I knew you were the youngest one, but I didn't know you were the dumbest." Seri piped bitterly. Ron dropped his mouth open in horror. "Is that all you got! I told you to curse me, not send off fireworks for my enjoyment!"
"Seri?" Neville asked softly.
"You always were the worst of them all. Bill's got style. Charlie's got talent. Percy's in crowd. Fred and George are funny. and what are you? Famous Harry Potter's little side kick." Seri sneered.
Ron was shaking, staring at her in disbelief.
"A disgrace!" Seri shouted. "You are a lanky, red headed git, with no proper parents to buy you new robes! What are those second hand or did your mother pull them out of a trash can."
"Seri. please." Harry said.
"Oh, I see. You are proud of your father. Think it is noble for him to work with filthy muggles and get paid barely enough for his family. If you ask me, the whole lot of you isn't worth one of his measly pay checks."
"CRUCIO!" Ron shouted.
A bust of a flames hit Seri straight in the chest, hard and fast. She stumbled and was against the wall. An inch of pain shown on her face, but then praise.
"Granger." She bellowed, totally throwing the curse off.
Ron was shaking. His face was white and when he got beside Harry, he collapsed onto the floor, his hands in his hair.
Hermione looked at Neville than to Harry. She gulped, and stepped forward into Ron's place.
Seri had straightened herself up. She was grinning mischievously and staring at Hermione.
"Going to make it hard Granger?" She said.
"Professor, honestly, why can't we do it on something else; an animal or a dumpy?" Hermione suggested.
"If I wanted your opinion, I would have asked for it. Now, do what you are told."
"Fine," Hermione said airily. "Crucio."
A stronger than Ron's first time, but not as powerful as his second hit Seri. An evil frown came on her face.
"You filthy mudblood!" She cried.
"Give it up," Hermione whined.
"Anything you can't read out of a book, you can't do. I'll be surprised if you couldn't walk without reading how to first." Seri had pure hatred on her face. "You can't do anything! All you know if what you read from a book. You don't know love, or bravery and you sure as hell don't know power! You are a dirty, little, moppy headed girl with big teeth and a bad breeder."
There was a short silence.
"Are you done?" Hermione asked arms crossed.
"Haven't even started." Seri said with a grin. "You know, I believe your parents are next on the list. The Dark Lord as been wiping out streets after streets of muggles. He thinks he needs to get rid of your parents. Oh, don't think it's because of you. it's because of Potter. Your parents, your grimy muggle parents will be a piece in his Lord's chess game."
Hermione was glowing pink now.
"One by one, your family will die. and for no reason. They will die simply because of what they are. and you are no better. Your breeding was wrong. and the only think you got was a book and a once of magic from it."
"Crucio!" Hermione said firmly.
Again, flames hit Seri in the chest. Her face turned in anguish, but then that died and she threw the curse off. She straightened up and Harry swore her saw a grin twinkle in the corner of her mouth.
"Longbottom."
Hermione, looking sort of pleased with herself, leaned against the wall next to Harry and glared down at Seri with I-showed-you-so-ha grin on her face.
"Sirius. I don't. please. don't." Neville stuttered.
"Say the words."
"I won't."
"Say the words that drove your parents crazy!" Seri sneered.
"Stop," Neville put his hands to his ears and started shaking his head.
"You want to say them. You want to kill someone, anyone. It isn't fair. you were robbed."
"Stop."
"They didn't even know who you were Neville."
"Please."
"They didn't remember you. they didn't want to."
"No."
"A half squib son. who would want to. Frank and Alice Longbottom were brave, smart and witty Aurors. how did they get a."
"It's."
".son like."
".Not."
".you!"
"TRUE!" Neville fell to his knees.
"Lestrange told me how it was. She said your father came on bending knees, praying them not to harm him. Praying to them that he didn't know anything."
"He did not."
"Your mum cried. she told them to leave her alone."
"Stop."
"Bellatrix said it was easy to drive your mum crazy. She said it was so quick with her that all she had to do was smack her."
"Stop."
"Your mum was crazy, Neville. She was a loony old bat. was and is!"
"Shut up!" Neville screamed. "CRUCIO!"
A fire ball of flames knocked Seri off her feet, sending her crashing into the wall. Her face was coiled in throbbing. Her eyes grew tender and pleading, before she lifted the cruse off her self.
She was gasping for breath. Neville dropped his wand and dropped to the floor were he was. "Come on Neville," Harry was kneeling beside him. He picked up the wand and handed it to Neville.
"Thanks Harry," Neville said breathless. Harry helped him up.
"No," Seri said, helping herself up. "Potter, you next."
"Some other."
"Now."
"Fine."
Neville helped himself to the wall and collapsed next to Ron, pale and beady eyed.
"You've got to learn Potter."
"Learn what?"
"That just because your father was a slimly little git you can't be one."
"My father wasn't a git. not as slimly as yours." Harry barked, before catching his words.
Seri smiled, "Do you believe that? No, you don't. I see it. You are ashamed of your father. hiding in his shadow. You can't get out of it. it looms around you."
"Shut up," Harry said.
"It's true though. You hate your father almost as bad as you hate me. You hate the truth. You like thinking your father was a hero. a strong, gallant hero. but he wasn't. he was a die hard fool!"
"Stop it!"
"No matter how fast you run, his shadow is always casted on you. He was smart Harry. you barely make passing grades. he was handsome. you have a scar on your forehead. he was brave. and you crumble at the mere thought of him."
"I DO NOT!"
"You wish Sirius was your father. Sirius was always there. Sirius helped you. Sirius is the only father you have." Seri snarled.
"JAMES POTTER IS MY FATHER!"
"Only by blood. At night you curse him for leaving you alone. at times you hate him. because all along. Snape was right about him."
"NO!" Harry yelled. His fist tightened around his wand. She was getting under his skin. She was trying to boil his blood and make him curse her, but he wouldn't do it.
But what got him the most. everything she was saying. it was true..
"Stop living a lie Harry! He was the father you never had. and the father you never wanted."
"It's not true!" Harry was on the blink to tears, but choked them back.
It wasn't true. he had met hi father behind the veil... and he was everything Harry knew he would be. He was funny. witty. and loving. he was the dad Harry always wanted. and no matter how much he thought he wanted Sirius as a father. Sirius could never be what James Potter could have been.
"It's not true." Harry said softly. He dropped his wand. "I won't do it. I don't want to hurt you."
Seri smiled, and it wasn't evil or mischievous, but a smile. "Very good Harry."
"What?" Ron said, finally regaining his voice.
"This was your fist test. Though all three of you did the spell, very, very well. you forget my first instruction. you have to know who and what you are. self confidence. You three let me get under your skin. bring out the deepest fears in you and say what you are afraid to say."
"I don't understand." Harry said, picking up his wand.
"Ron is afraid of being the worst of all his brothers. and the fact that his family isn't rich. Hermione is scared of being nothing but a book worm and for her family. Neville is troubled by his parent's fate."
"And I'm frightened of my dad's memory." Harry continued.
"Right." Seri said, nodding. "Knowing your fears and facing them is the first step. when you are fighting a death eater or Voldemort himself. they will know how to make you crack. they'll know what scares you most and will turn it against you. That's why you have to know yourself enough to over come that and control it."
"So control our fears." Hermione said softly.
"Exactly." Seri said. "I'm not going to teach you any farther. you know enough. but when the times comes for you to use it. think of every foul thing about the person. imagine them saying the things I just said to you and punishing them for it. Use the only weapon they have against you. against them."
"Our fears." Ron completed.
"Your fears." Seri copied.
There was a slight nervous sense around them. Neville was shaking. and it was no wonder to Harry. Their deepest fears and taunts had just been revealed and they could no longer imagine them not being there.
The rest of the week was slow going. The next day, Harry was like a robot. talking and goofing around, but still not having his whole self in the day. That afternoon, when he had Occlumency, it was terrible. They were now at the stage, where Seri was using Legilimency on him. The only memories she got out of him were ones of his father. from when he was alive, from behind the veil and from Snape's memory.
And so on it went, Ron, Hermione and Neville were acting the same way as Harry. They had nothing hiding anymore, at least not from themselves. Katie was wearing Ron and Harry out with Quidditch practice, which they had every night. Before they knew it. Friday had rolled around. And that afternoon, Harry found himself traveling down to the dungeons for his animagius lesson.
He had been thinking about this since that day in Azkaban. Why couldn't he keep a stag? Why didn't it feel right? What was going on?
And when he entered the room, it seemed Seri had been asking herself the same thing.
"Oh, Harry. there you are. please, please, sit down." She motioned toward the seat in front of her. "We need to talk."
Harry took a deep breath, "I don't want to be a stag any more."
"What?"
Harry looked up at her, she was sitting on the desk, totally dumb founded. He gulped and looked back down at his feet. "Being a stag had something to do with my dad. but I'm not my dad. and I'm sick and tiered of trying to be."
"Harry." Seri started.
"Don't, please don't." Harry cut in, "I want to be something different. not a stag."
"Harry, I know." Seri said softly.
"You do?" Harry said, taking a breath from talking so fast. "But why did you let me chose a stag?"
"Did you learn anything from being a stag?" Seri asked sweetly.
"Well." Harry thought of this. nothing productive he was going to change animal anyway. "Not really."
"Oh come one Harry. think. what did you learn?"
Harry sighed and became thinking about this. What did he learn? He learned he wasn't supposed to be a stag and that when you weren't supposed to be that animal your body threw it off. He learned. "I learn I wasn't my father." He said softly.
"Exactly!" Seri called cheerfully. "You learn something about your father!"
"No I didn't." Harry trailed off.
"Yes you did. you learn one very, extremely important thing! You are not James Dean Potter!" Seri yelled, throwing her hands in the air. "And you learned that no matter how much you love you father, following in his foot steps does not make you love him any more. You and your father are two different people completely and just because you found out your father isn't exactly what you pictured him as."
"Seri." Harry said, looking at her.
"I sent it Harry." She said childishly. "I found it half written on his desk and thought you might believe Sirius if you didn't Remus or me."
Harry took a gulp. she had sent Sirius's letter. it all made sense now. it all made sense.
"Why didn't you tell me before?" Harry finally said.
"Because I thought it would mean more coming from an invisible person." Seri said, nodding in agreement. "An invisible person to help from hiding under an invisible shadow."