[18 July 2013] Edited, because I notice people are still reading this old, old story, and I'm horrified at the grammar of my old self. -_- Also taken the opportunity to straighten out warnings in Author Notes.

Author Notes:

Here is the first of the yaoi scenes I warned you about in the prologue. And uh, a dubious-consent one at that. Intense angst, emotional torture throughout. *wince*

Italics are thoughts and flashbacks.

A Wing Short of Flying

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I love you, but you are all I know. Forgive me.

- October Project, "Ariel"

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Chapter Four: The Fall

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Tsuzuki awoke to the sound of the door being opened.

Who, at this time…?

In the dark, he heard footsteps approaching his bed. Then a curious rasping sound.

"M-master!" It was Hisoka's voice. Muraki is here?

"Why were you sleeping? I told you to watch him."

The hushed voices became more distant as steps rattled away from his bed towards the other side of the room.

"He is asleep, and he won't…"

"I don't care what you think. You will not question my orders." A very cold tone.

"…Yes, Master. I'm sorry."

A rustle of clothes. Tsuzuki squinted. The room was too dark.

"…Master, what…"

A squeak, and the sound of something hitting the wooden floor. Tsuzuki tried hard to adjust his vision to the darkness.

"M-master, not here…"

"I will decide where we do this." More rustling of clothes.

"But he hasn't taken a sedative! He may wake up and hear…"

"Not if you keep quiet. Or do you want me to gag you?"

Now wait a—

"No!"

"Then just do as I say. Spread your legs."

…What?

"Master, we really can't…"

"You've been resisting me more and more lately. Do you think because you find someone of your kind, you could now be redeemed?"

"I never think of leaving you, really!"

A snicker. "Do not forget, boy. Now that I've found the perfect subject for my research, this is the only use you have left for me."

A choked sound.

"Did I tell you to cry?"

A stifled gasp, and then silence.

"Good." A mocking tone. "You can scream for me another time. Not tonight."

Tsuzuki's eyes were accustomed to the darkness now, and he could make out the shapes in the corner of the room.

The sight made his stomach churn.

Hisoka's eyes met his, as the boy had undoubtedly sensed his emotion. The eyes were wide with fear and shame, and Tsuzuki read a silent plea in them.

Don't look, he said? Tsuzuki clenched his fists under the blanket. How does he expect me to turn away from that?!

He saw Muraki swung a hand, and heard a slap.

"Where are you looking?"

"M…master… can we just… go to your room, please…?"

The trembling form was pushed down with force.

"I told you not to leave this room. We would want to know if Tsuzuki-san suddenly decided to take his own life again, wouldn't we?"

Tsuzuki recalled the bruises on Hisoka's hands. Now he knew what caused them.

This was far worse than the beating he thought it was.

Tsuzuki made a move to get up. But his muscles were stiff as wood.

Stupid limbs! Move!

He could kill Muraki, he knew he could. With all his unearthly power he could tear him to parts and burn the remains to ashes.

Hisoka stole a glance at him again, a frightened one, before he suddenly gasped in pain, his back arched in a jerked motion.

Tsuzuki could barely bear the sight. Hisoka's eyes were brimming with tears he dared not shed, but still they pleaded to him in despair: look away, just look away…

He managed to shift his leg off the edge of the bed. I couldn't care less what he—

—Please don't hurt him…—

Tsuzuki froze. What was that?

—Don't come over… Don't hurt him…Please…—

Tsuzuki pressed hard on his forehead. He was talking in my mind!

He stared across the darkness to Hisoka, the owner of the voice. He never knew the boy could transfer his thoughts like that!

Hisoka's eyes were tightly shut, though Tsuzuki couldn't tell if it was due to the pain or the telepathy. His hair was stuck on his face, wet with sweat, and he was panting hard. Then he opened his eyes and saw Tsuzuki in his frozen state.

"…Please," he said, in a quiet, quivering voice.

Tsuzuki knew it was meant for him, but it was Muraki who responded. The doctor chuckled. "I'm just starting."

"…Please," he whispered again, and closed his eyes in silent surrender.

Tsuzuki's eyes regained focus, and he was aware of the burning sensation in them. Why does he always protect that vicious doctor? How can I free him when he doesn't want to be freed!

He bit his own lips so hard they bled. All this accursed power and I can do nothing!

He laid back in frustration, forcefully turned his face from the tangled forms on the floor. Still he saw them, the sickening sight of the willing rape; still he heard the stifled gasps, the bodies writhing on the floor. He shut his mind from all that his senses told him, not comprehending, not caring. It had been so easy before he came to this room.

Yet he was no longer capable of that.

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The hushed noises subsided a little before dawn. Tsuzuki knew it exactly because he had stayed awake all through it, waiting for the noises to stop just as he'd been waiting for his death— with no end in sight. He hadn't even bothered to close his eyes, keeping them trained on the dark sky outside the window.

He was aware of Muraki leaving the room, and couldn't help feeling worried when Hisoka had not gotten up from the floor soon after that.

He did, eventually. Tsuzuki watched from the corner of his eyes as the boy sat up in broken movements, then proceeded to stand on his terribly shaking legs. He picked up his clothes, admiringly managed not to fall whenever he bent down, and painstakingly dragged himself to the shower room next door.

He didn't glance once towards Tsuzuki.

Tsuzuki was still looking outside the window when the washroom door opened. The boy's hair was wet from shower, the blood stains Tsuzuki had glimpsed on his body earlier had disappeared. But the bruises remained, and hatefully, so did the images of him under Muraki in Tsuzuki's mind.

He was carrying a pail and a piece of rag, with which he cleaned the floor on the spot where the intercourse had taken place.

Tsuzuki felt his anger raging inside to a suffocating degree. He hated Muraki for enslaving the poor boy, hated himself for not being able to stop that. But presently, more intense than those was his overwhelming anger at Hisoka for allowing himself to be violated so.

At that blinded moment he didn't care that Hisoka could feel his anger, didn't care that it caused the boy's hands to tremble even more as he continued scrubbing the wooden surface.

They didn't look at each other until Hisoka finished his chore and returned the pail and rag to the washroom.

Tsuzuki exhaled deeply, letting out the building tension.

Why do I have to be so angry anyway? He thought bitterly. He adores that doctor. If he chooses to be used by that bastard like that, then let him.

Hisoka emerged from the washroom. Tsuzuki glanced at him. For a brief second their eyes met.

The green eyes were clouded, troubled. Tsuzuki couldn't see the reflections of his emotions in them anymore. The boy lowered his gaze quickly, but Tsuzuki continued to stare in a sudden revelation.

You are jealous, Tsuzuki!

Yes, he was jealous that the doctor meant so much to Hisoka even though he was the one the boy called 'someone like me'. He was jealous that Hisoka still chose to remain in the existence that his master had created for him. He was jealous, because after the boy had convinced him to start living again, he had left him alone.

You need me just as much as I need you.

It was too late for him to resort back to indifference now.

Hisoka sat down quietly in the far corner, away from Tsuzuki. The boy had been there when he first opened his eyes in this room, but after that he'd always sat beside Tsuzuki's bed. That was how close they had grown to be… and how far they had been torn apart.

"Hisoka," he called softly, and the boy jumped at that. He didn't answer, nor lifted his head to face Tsuzuki.

At one moment we were sharing everything, and the next we're hurting each other like this.

"Hisoka!" he called again, more desperately. Hisoka clutched his knees in an effort to ignore him.

Tsuzuki sighed in frustration. He started to move his legs down the bed, painfully pulled his back to sit up.

Hisoka stole uneasy glances at him. As Tsuzuki bent forward and lost his balance, the boy couldn't ignore him any more. He sprang across the room, his knees sliding along the floor as he caught Tsuzuki before the man hit the floor. He could barely support Tsuzuki's weight, but with great effort finally managed to push him back on the bed.

Tsuzuki leaned on the headboard, slightly out of breath.

"Don't try to get up yet!" Hisoka muttered. It was the closest to a scolding that Tsuzuki had ever heard from him.

"But you wouldn't come." Tsuzuki put a hand on Hisoka's cheek, gently forcing him to meet his eyes.

Hisoka closed his eyes as emotions rippled through him. He couldn't identify them.

"All of the nights that I was sedated?" Tsuzuki asked.

Hisoka turned away, withdrawing his face from Tsuzuki's touch in the process.

"Hisoka."

"I wish you never knew," he whispered, his voice broken.

"I do now," Tsuzuki said quietly. "And I wish I had known earlier."

Hisoka clutched on his own sleeves, crossing his arms in front of his chest as if he suddenly felt naked.

"Don't hurt him." The voice quivered, but the resolution was firm.

"He's using you! Can you say you enjoy how he treats you?"

Hisoka chewed his lower lip. "…I don't mind being useful."

Tsuzuki couldn't believe such an irrational thought could possibly exist. He gripped Hisoka's shoulders, startling him.

"You said we had the right to live. This is not living, Hisoka!"

"Why not? I've been living like this for half of my years."

The tone was cold, as though he was trying to hide how he was actually hurting. Tsuzuki clenched the thin shoulders in frustration. "I can't believe you can be this fool—"

"Ah, so energetic today, Tsuzuki-san."

They turned abruptly to the door to find Muraki standing there. Hisoka paled.

Tsuzuki felt his hatred boiling. He dropped his hands from Hisoka's shoulders.

"Shall we resume the therapy?" Muraki asked cheerfully.

Tsuzuki kept his gaze neutral, but didn't care to respond. Hisoka still stood beside his bed, not moving to Muraki's side as he usually did.

"Boy, go and get a pot of warm water ready."

Hisoka made a sound, apparently still too stoned to speak. He nodded, hastily walked past the doctor to the door, and disappeared.

"Tsuzuki-san."

Tsuzuki waited. The warm water was no more than an excuse to get Hisoka out of the room.

"You seem to talk a lot to my boy while you're always reserved in my presence."

"My boy"! He'd said that on purpose. Tsuzuki glared.

Muraki smiled, and approached the bed.

"That makes me jealous, you know," he said as he sat on the edge of the bed, leaning closer.

Tsuzuki edged away uncomfortably.

"Tsuzuki-san, you have a fascinating body. I can study it for years and it will still amaze me." Muraki brushed his fingers over Tsuzuki's cheek. They were cold. "And you are also very beautiful."

…What did he say?

Muraki smiled again as his hand trailed down Tsuzuki's neck, taking in the feel of the skin.

"So perhaps you were awake when we were here last night," he continued, and Tsuzuki stiffened. He… intentionally…

"A devoted slave he is, and he delights me. But the one I'm obsessed with is you."

That made Tsuzuki's fury burn anew. This bastard…!

He shot an icy glare at Muraki. "Take your hands off me, Doctor."

Muraki paused, seemingly surprised. But his hand persisted, and his face moved closer still.

"Ah, these beautiful violet eyes. They are even more brilliant when they shine in anger…"

Tsuzuki was losing his temper. "Do you hear me—"

Muraki moved to kiss him, and Tsuzuki barely avoided it when they heard a loud rattle from the door.

Hisoka stood there, his green eyes shocked wide. The loud rattle had come from the pot of water as its cover jolted up, due to the boy's sudden halt.

"Hisoka?" Tsuzuki called, worried.

Muraki waved absently at the boy. "Put it on the table," he ordered. "We'll start after I'm done talking to Tsuzuki-san."

"Hi—" Tsuzuki started, then realized that the boy was not listening. He walked stiffly to place the pot on the table, and retreated to the corner.

Muraki advanced again, and Tsuzuki tried to push him away. "I said get off me!"

The doctor sneered. "Now, now, don't be so shy. It's not as if our audience is new to this kind of thing."

"You—!" Tsuzuki raged. He threw a quick glance at Hisoka. My goodness, how awful he must be feeling right now…

Hisoka's eyes were lowered, occasionally glancing towards the door as if longing to escape from the room.

"…this is the only use you have left for me."

Before him now was his master's plain proclamation that even for that use he could be easily abandoned.

Tsuzuki's fury was burning him alive. That kind of use, I would gladly take it away from you!

His right hand was hanging limp beside the bed, hidden from Muraki's view. Slowly, slowly as he let Muraki brush his lips along his face, he focused energy on that hand. Control… control…

Hisoka looked up as he heard the crisp crackling of the energy, and so did Muraki. But there wasn't time enough to do anything, as the next moment energy exploded in a huge circle of light around them.

Hisoka let out a startled cry. Muraki was thrown onto the floor. The blast had seared his chest and his left arm, where his coat now bore gaping holes.

"Master!" Hisoka ran towards Muraki.

"Leave him!" Tsuzuki glared venomously.

Hisoka hesitated, his legs slowed down slightly as he turned to Tsuzuki.

Muraki made an effort to get up, which failed miserably. Tsuzuki was about to aim another blast at him when Hisoka shot him a final nervous glance and ran to the doctor's side.

"Hisoka!" Tsuzuki warned. He couldn't risk sending the energy to their direction.

Hisoka pretended he hadn't heard. He helped Muraki to his feet, staggering under the doctor's weight, but managed to carry him to the door. Tsuzuki had always admired his determination, but he couldn't detest it more at this moment.

The boy turned a sad glance at him, and then they were gone from the room.

Tsuzuki looked down at his right hand. It still felt hot after the blast. To think that this power can actually be useful…

He profusely regretted that the attack hadn't killed Muraki. He needed to work harder on his control, and soon.

The thought didn't excite him, however. Tsuzuki sighed.

Even if I kill the doctor… he will not start living if I don't make him see the path that he should take.

He leaned back and contemplated the piece of sky on the window.

The path for us to live… starts from outside of this room.

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