My sincerest apologies for being a lazy writer and taking forever with this chapter. Thank you to all the people who reviewed: Lady Sundig of the Wired, The Demonic Duo, A.L. Lorraine, Kitsuna-Ri, Lady DeathAngel, Ambika-san, q, Uozumi, SB for Me, tinuavial42, madkornfan, Jasini, Fade to Black, Mistress of the Manuscript, Destiny Bunny, xMadgirlX, Mr D. Grey (Lord, is he manly!) violentstrorm32, fuzzyfishbowl, freakyfairy, Liver Beazard, Gypsy Lupin-Black, Big BlackDog, warriorGl, Emerald Moony, bard (Yeah, I love Alberta! Not that I've actually been there since I moved away…), jadewerewolf, dillydally, Gibe the Worl for Mr.Black, flamingo, Chloe Wagner, BaYer04rulz, Mordecai, nekohebi, kk, holly, Demus (much love), lil' Hp FAN, Liz, nightpearl, Robby Moon, Betsy Crandell, Jaime, , kayloo, Kura, Lauren (*bows down to fellow Sean Bean fan*), Atiannala (thanks for so many kind reviews), No 1 you wanna no and shimmeryrainbowgrrl. 

A couple of individual notes:

The counter: Doesn't everyone think that someone who goes down a whole page of fanfics submitting this review, 'There is 20 romances on this page. This page holds 25 stories. Is your romance just one in many?', is quite sad. And it should be 'there are twenty romances'…

{*mariatortia*}: Am very upset that you called Sean Bean a minger. Insult Sean Bean, darling; insult me.

Aidenfire: Sean Bean is definitely hot. Trust me.

~Remus' POV, Saturday 18th October~

I sit perched on the window ledge, looking out over James' garden. It's quite early, about eight O'clock, and the house is utterly silent. Sirius is sprawled across the bed, with the white sheets wrapped roughly round his waist, and the first precious rays of sunlight tracing a pattern across his naked torso.

          In my hand I have a bunch of letters. My hand trembles as I open the first. It is addressed to myself but dated from many weeks ago when I first went to Beauxbatons. I'm tempted to forget about the letters; to burn them, or rip them up. I don't want to know what Sirius went through when we were apart. I don't want to remember what I felt when we were apart. At the same time, I have this immense desire to know that Sirius suffered as much in my absence as I did in his…    

Remus,

                   You've been gone thirteen hours. I feel empty. Do you understand what I mean? Maybe you think I'm pathetic. I probably am.

          I feel like I'm missing something. It's like I've gone to a duel without my wand. I know I'm missing something- even when I'm not thinking about you, I know something is missing- and I don't know what to do.

                                                                   Sirius.

          P.S. I'm wearing your ring.

          I turn to the next letter in the pile.

          Moony,

                   This is only the second day since you left and I still don't know what to do. I took James' new broom out for a ride and the wind in my face as I soared across the country made me feel better for a while. It's a pity I ever had to come back down to earth.

          This isn't even a proper letter. It's too short. But what can I say to make it longer?

          How about 'I love you'?

                                      Padfoot.

          I know I should stop reading the letters. I wish Sirius had never given them to me. This doesn't stop me picking up another letter and starting to read.

          Darling Remus,

                   I'm not posting these. I don't even know why I'm writing them. James says I should move on. What does he know?

          I keep dreaming about you. Sometimes I wish I didn't have to do to sleep, so I wouldn't be disappointed when I wake up and you're not there. At other times I can't wait to go to bed, if only to see your face again.

          Dreams are all I have, Remus-love.

                                                          Sirius.

          I look up from the third letter and take a deep breath. Then I tear up all the rest of the letters. I don't need to read anymore. I'm back with Sirius and nothing else matters.

          "Why did you tear them up?" asks Sirius, who has just sat up in bed, leaving smudges of eyeliner behind on his pillow.

          I ignore his question. "Why didn't you send them?" I ask.

          Sirius shrugs. "They'd have only upset you." My eyes linger on his bare shoulders- the skin is drawn tight over bone and I wonder if he's been eating properly.

          I climb off the window ledge and get into bed with him. "I have a question for you," I say. There's something been bothering me about a certain piece of jewellery.

          "I expected you would," Sirius says gently.

          "You know I have a star-shaped earring?"

          Sirius nuzzles me neck. "Yes," he murmurs, kissing my hair.

          "I bought it off your cousin. You said her name was Carmen. How come-"

          Sirius cuts me off. "She's a werewolf," he says flatly. "The earring is platinum. It just looks silver."

          "YOUR COUSIN'S A WERWOLF!" I cry. "Why haven't you ever told me that before now?"

          Sirius shrugs again. "It wasn't important."

          We both stay quiet for a while.

          "It's started snowing," says Sirius to break the silence.

          "James will be happy," I reply. James loves snowball fights. So does Sirius, as it happens.

          "Let's go for a walk?" blurts out Sirius suddenly.

"What! In the snow?"

"Yes!"

And within a few minutes we're both dressed- Sirius is wearing the most indecently tight jeans I have ever seen, black denim and flared at the bottom, coupled with a purple shirt, some heavy purple robes and his 'highwayman' boots (minus the spurs). He holds my hand as we creep down stairs and out through the front door, and then Sirius is laughing and leaping through a curtain of falling snow, and all I can see of him is this patch of purple and black, brilliant against the whiteness.

            ~Later~

            James' mother is everything I could ever wish for in a mum. She's kind and caring, a damn good cook, fond of massive hugs and motherly in a way my own mum could never be.

          And more to the point, she's invited me to spend Christmas with Sirius and James.

          Right now, she's in France, explaining to my parents that I'm safe and well, and trying to acquire me some clothing or money for new clothes. James, Sirius and I are sat round the kitchen table sipping cups of red-hot cocoa.

          "It's really kind of your mum to go to France, James. I don't think I could have faced seeing my parents right now."

          James shrugs. "It's the least we could do after what you've been through."

          Sirius puts an arm round me. "It's going to be a great Christmas!" he says enthusiastically.

          James frowns. "It hasn't been the same without you, Remus. I wish there was something-" he finishes abruptly, as if unsure what to say to me.

          Sirius is smiling. "And it's going to be the best New Year ever!!!" he enthuses.

          "Sirius…" hisses James. "I thought you'd be a bit more bloody sensitive!"

          Sirius and I look at each other. "I'm not going back to Beauxbatons in the New Year, James," I say eventually. 

          James starts to grin broadly. "You're coming back! To Hogwarts? That's fabulous! Brilliant news! I can't believe-"

          "No, I'm not going back to Hogwarts, James."

          "We're leaving school," explains Sirius, happily.

          The grin has vanished from James' face. He sits looking desperately unhappy for a few seconds, then he gets up and walks out of the room. The kitchen door slams shut behind him.

          "Bugger him," says Sirius looking shocked. "We tell him out good news and-"

          "HOW THE HELL CAN YOU BE SO BLOODY INSENSITIVE?" I shout. Sirius looks completely taken aback and more than a little hurt. I continue in a quieter tone. "You're James' best friend and you're leaving him all alone."

          "He's got Peter…" says Sirius guiltily. Then he also gets up and looks at me, ashen-faced. "I'll go and talk to him," he says but doesn't get past the door because at that moment James reappears and Mrs. Potter apparates into the room. She smiles at me and hands me a bag of clothes.

          "I shouldn't have walked off like that," says James to Sirius and myself.

          Sirius shakes his head. "You had every right to. I was being a complete Pratt and I'm sorry."  He tentatively holds out his arms and, much to my surprise, James steps forward and hugs him tight.

          Mrs Potter smiles at her son for a second then turns to face me. "Your parents weren't in, Remus. But I left them a note and took some clothes from upstairs." She gestures at my bag of clothes, many of which are sparkling softly. "I see you're into this glam pop malarkey as well."

          "Glam Rock," corrects Sirius, grinning at Mrs Potter.

~Sunday 19th October~

            "This is our flat, darling." Sirius leads me into the tiny flat. I gasp. Inside the flat looks about five times bigger and is all painted purple. We walk hand-in-hand down the hallway. The purple carpet is soft underfoot.

          "I can't believe this is all ours," I say incredulously as we enter an extravagantly furnished salon. Sirius releases my hand and sprawls seductively on a purple chaise-lounge. "How did you afford this?" I ask.

          Sirius beckons me nearer and when I'm within his reach he pulls me down on top of him. "I knew you'd never want me if I wasn't rich. This is my way of showing you how much money I have."

          What?!

 It suddenly dawns on me that I'm in a dream. And for the first time I realise that dream-Sirius is naked. "Of course I'd want you if you were poor." I say, trying to wake up.

          "Not like this," Sirius replies and I realise he's unbuttoning my shirt. I know I'm dreaming but I don't want to wake up. I want this. I want Sirius. "You're so beautiful," he whispers and his breath is hot in my ear as he unbuttons my jeans. "So very-"

          "Remus Lupin!! Where are you, Remus? REMUS!!!" screams my mother.

          "I'll not stand for this!" shouts my father.

          "He's still asleep," says Mrs Potter, her voice coming from the hallway. Of the Potters home. Not some fantasy flat I was dreaming of.

          "If we catch him with that filthy Black bastard then-"

          Mr Potter interrupts my father angrily. "I'll have no talk like that in my house. I demand that you leave at once."

          I pull the covers over my head and hope my parents won't come up. Sirius wakes up and moans sleepily. "What is it?" he mumbles.

          "It's my parents!" I hiss. Downstairs I hear the front door slam shut and I relax. "They've gone."

          "What did they want?" asks Sirius.

          "I'll go and see." I pull on a dressing-gown and head downstairs. James' dad, a tall, pale-faced man of about fifty, looks at me gravely when I enter the kitchen. It appears he was in deep discussion with Mrs Potter.

          "Your parents were just here, Remus," he says formally.

          "What did they want?" I croak.

          Mr Potter clears his throat and looks awkward. "It appears Beauxbatons sent the belongings you left behind to your parents. These included your diary."

          Oh God. My parents have read my diary. They know about Sirius.

          Hell.

          ~Back Upstairs ~

          "You know I'd love you if you weren't rich," I tell Sirius, relishing the sight of him trying to do up one of his stupidly tight pairs of jeans.

            He laughs. "Whatever brought this on, darling?"

          "It's just a dream I had," I explain but Sirius frowns at me.

          "What sort of dream?" he asks.

          God, this boy asks too many questions. "A dream. I had last night. Just a dream," I mumble sheepishly.

          Sirius finally manages to fasten his jeans and turns to face me. "This wouldn't be a fantasy we're talking about would it?"

          I blush furiously. Sometimes I have to remind myself that I'm truly madly deeply in love with this boy. Right now I'm trying hard not to strangle him.

          "What was I wearing in this fantasy, sweet-pea," teases Sirius.

          I give in. "OKAY! FINE! It was a fantasy, Sirius. A full-blown sexual-fantasy! Or at least it would have been if I my parents hadn't woken me up!!! And for the record, you weren't wearing anything, sugar-plum!"

          Sirius turns a slight shade of pink. He looks at me sheepishly. "We're seventeen, Remus. We've left school. If it's sex you want, then…"

          "I don't know!" I say and wonder how this conversation ever got onto sex, and how to explain to Sirius about my problem. "Sex isn't that simple," I start.

          "No?" asks Sirius, still blushing.

          "Werewolves mate for life."

          Sirius stands and stares at me. Then he starts to laugh again. "That's what you're scared about?" he chuckles.

          I nod.

          He stops laughing and takes my hands in his. "Christ Almighty, Remus! I'm wearing your wedding ring! Do you think I don't want to spend the rest of my life with you?"

          "I know but-"

          "I Love you, you flaming idiot! Forever! They'll never be anybody else!"

          "It's just-"

          "You and me. Always."

          His lips are pressed against mine when Mrs Potter enters the room. She shrieks and then recovers herself as we spring apart from each other. She clears her throat. "Well, I can see why your parents aren't too pleased, Remus," she says.

          "Do you mind, Mrs Potter?" I ask earnestly.

          Mrs Potter, a small plump woman with a dazzling smile and greying hair, shakes her head. "Not in the least, boys. Will you join us downstairs for breakfast?"

          "Of course!" cries Sirius, kissing Mrs Potter on both cheeks and grinning at me, with such a look of pure love on his face that I almost start to cry.    

            ~That Evening~

          It's seven O'clock and they still haven't gone to the cocktail party.      

James looks bored out of his mind. "You look beautiful, mum," he says for about the fifteenth time.

          "Are you sure?" coos Mrs Potter anxiously. She tugs at the hemline of her green dress. "This doesn't make me look too fat?"

          "No!" snaps James.

          "It's perfect!" cries Mr Potter.

          "My bum doesn't look too-"

          Mr Potter finishes his glass of whisky. "For God's sake woman! We should have left twenty minutes ago! There's scarcely any point in going now!"

          It's Sirius who saves the day. He pretends to scrutinize Mrs Potter, then nods approvingly. "Mrs Potter, you look very 'glam'. That dress perfectly compliments your skin colour! And did you know green is the most attractive colour there is? I fell in love with Remus when he was wearing emerald-green dress robes. And James," Sirius grins wickedly, "clearly only likes Lily for her bright green eyes!"

          Mrs Potter looks incredibly pleased. "That's very charming of you, Sirius." She beckons to her husband. "Come along, love. What on earth are you waiting for?"

          And with that, Mrs Potter disappears, followed seconds later by a very frustrated Mr Potter.

          "I'm going upstairs to put my green jumper on!" says James jumping up and sprinting to the hallway.

Sirius intercepts him. "Mate, the green stuff was a load of bullshit! Now get lost!"

          James grins at us, walks over to the fireplace, grabs a handful of floo powder and with a final cry of 'Lily's House!' is gone.

          Sirius comes and curls up next to me on the sofa. "I thought we'd never be alone," he says. Then he rests his head on my lap. I stroke his glossy hair absent-mindedly. "God, you're incredible…" I murmur.

          "I am aren't I?"

          I nip his nose playfully.

          "It's my birthday in three days," he says.

          I kiss his lips. "We'll you've got your birthday present from me."

          "I have?"

          "Well, James has," I say, remembering how I had given James, Sirius' birthday present expecting to be stuck in France.

          "What is it?"

          "Not telling." I lean down and kiss him properly. He tastes faintly of smoke. "Have you been smoking?"

          Sirius mumbles something that sounds like "Hmm…. well…. I occasionally… cigarette…yes…"

          I pretend to be cross but I don't really care. Then I can't think of anything to say and the silence becomes awkward. Even Sirius looks a bit embarrassed. And all the time something is forming in my mind, something I want to ask but am far too scared. Am I ready? What if he turns me down? 

          "I'll get us a drink," says Sirius, getting up. Go on! Say it!

          "Make love to me!" I cry.

          Sirius turns around in the doorway. "Pardon?" For a second I think he's teasing me, then I realise that he hasn't heard what I said.

          "Make love to me."

          Sirius stares at me blankly.

          "Sex, Sirius! Sex!"

          Then he grins. "I know what you meant and I did hear you the first time! You do realise what you're doing, Remus? Me, forever?"

          I growl at him.

          And he leads me up to our bedroom, where a faint trickle of star-light seeps in through the window and sparkles on the bed linen.

          ~~~

          Author's Note: One more chapter left, folks! One chapter for a happy ending!

          Also, if anyone likes LOTR slash please read my two recent fics (Sam/Frodo, Aragorn/Boromir)!!! There is also a very short collection of poetry called 'Love Drenched In Glitter' based on this fanfic. Though I'm certainly no poet…